So. Twilight meets Harry potter?

Author's Response: Maybe it's wrong on my part but I feel offended and if that is the impression my writing gives out I might just have to reconsider my life choices.

 Report Review

wow I loved this. If you ever get more inspiration for this story that would be amazing. Though as an author like you. It is somtimes a pain. My stories just come to me. and somtimes i can go months before it suddenly dawns on me. THIS is where its supposed t go. or this is whats supposed to happen next. or somtimes I have to start a whooole new story because it wouldn't leave me alone. Anyway I do love this short story two shot thing that has potential to be more.

Author's Response: Thank you so much and it feels refreshing to find someone who understands how frustrating it can be.

 Report Review

very beautiful

Author's Response: Thank you.

 Report Review

would love to read more. please update!!

Author's Response: This is basically it for this story but you're welcome to read some of my other stories, thank you for your review.

 Report Review

Hi, I really like your use of language in this story. It is very artful, and i like that!
However, the only thing that ruined this story for me is the lack of punctuation. Commas are missing where they are needed, and it makes it hard to read.

 Report Review

5 star story. Brilliant.

Author's Response: Thank you.

 Report Review

I loved this chapter, it's very well written and descriptive. Well done.

 Report Review

I liked hearing Draco's thoughts. Well done!

Author's Response: Glad you like it, I thought he should really have a say in the whole affair and again thank you for taking the time to review.

 Report Review

This was really good. Poetic, and dark. I love Poe! Great job!

Author's Response: Thank you that's really what I was aming for you know trying to get some of that darkness that he does with such perfection, being a huge Poe fan , I'd never ever in a million years compare in any way my work to him but still I'm glad you enjoyed it and thank you so much for the review.

 Report Review

Um.. when's the next chapter coming up bruh ?

Author's Response: Not sure if there is going to be a next one at least not now but you're welcome to check out my other stories which I should be updating anyday now n_n and Thank you for the review.

 Report Review

Wow. I'm speechless. This was incredibly and heartbreakingly beautiful

Author's Response: Thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

 Report Review

very lovely.

this was just enough. i truly enjoyed what you did with this second chapter and the first, and understand your dilemma: i don't know where else it can really go. nevertheless, it was an incredible read. you have an amazing writing style and great talent. keep up the amazing work!! (:

Author's Response: Once agian thank you both for reading and for understanding XD

 Report Review

very lovely.

this was beautifully written and developed. short and sweet, but full of an emotion that exceeds most. wonderful job. i really enjoyed this! (:

Author's Response: Aww thank you so much, it really means alot that you guys enjoy what I write it makes me want to keep doing it. n_n

 Report Review

Awesome !
Must have more ! ;)

Author's Response: Thank you n_n I'm so glad you enjoyed it.

 Report Review

amazing make a continuation of it please!!!

Author's Response: I don't think I will I very much like the way it works as a one-shot at lest for now but thank you so much for reviewing n_n

 Report Review

love this! great job!

Author's Response: Thank you XD

 Report Review

AWWW i absolutely love it

Author's Response: n_n Thank you

 Report Review

We like this one, despite it's utter lack of punctuation. It almost made us cry. "Cry." So beautiful, Draco, so sensitive.

Author's Response: Lol well I'm glad you can forgive such a fault and still enjoy my writting thank you XD

 Report Review

Powerful, this one.

My favorite line... "Cry."

Wow... nothing else said, nothing else needed to be said. One word. I am baffled that your one word, carefully placed, meant so much.

When one word can mean so much, that is superb writing skill.

And then followed by the excellent description... "a gentle command." Draco as commanding, but gentle... Hot, hot, hot!

Who couldn't fall in love with this man?

Bravo!

Author's Response: n/n thank you so much. Just reading what you guys have to say gives me more and more confidence in my writing I'm aware that there are still many things to work on but Thank you so much none the less n_n

 Report Review

Wooow, this is sooo good!! The only one smal thing I dont understand is why Hermione feels that way...sorry, it might just be me, being a bot dumb. LOL
this is such an amazing story btw well done, great job :D

Author's Response: I didn't really have a reason I just think that there are time when we all feel as if the world is coming down on us and absolutely no one around us cares. It's dificult to explain and hard to understand if you've never felt that way n_n

 Report Review

I really really love this. I like how you gave hermione an almost 'dark side' I agree that adding more may ruin it, is perfect as it is:)

Author's Response: Thank you so much n_n

 Report Review

I like this story. I love the fact that you didn't outright say who the two people were, even though we knew it was Hermione and Draco.

You really brought out Hermione's most inner thoughts and feelings and did it quite well.

Fantastic job!

Author's Response: Thank you n_n

 Report Review

Wow! You did an amazing job with this!!! I wish that you could make this into a longer story, and not jut a one-shot, that's how good it is!!!
10/10

Author's Response: Thank you so much it means alot and I have tried it a couple of times but right now I simply can't find the right way to do it maybe farther along I'll give it another try but thank you so much for reviewing.

 Report Review

Oh My Lord!!! You have to make this into an actual story-it could be an amazing story, seriously!!

Author's Response: Thank you but I wouldn't know how to do it XD

 Report Review

I love this, the whole idea of them being in horrible torment, or 'burning' as you put it, and only being able to see it in each other. I think it is entirely plausible.

I think you could improve this a lot by expanding it - it is very short, and I think there is a lot of room to tell more of what was going on. You still don't have to get too specific, because that wouldn't fit with the story, but a little bit more detial would add to this greatly.

Also, grammatically, it needs a little work - commas, phrasing etc. But I think that could come with practice, and with spell check! :)

Other than that, I thought it was wonderful.
Very nice!

-Lily

Author's Response: n_n thank you and I'll take into account all of your advise thank you so much for it.

 Report Review