I think you have a great story but if I were you I would've done a few things differently.

"And now he is free. He finally escaped the bounds of Azkaban". I think that before that, it would be better if you had more text, or if you had a break and changed the sentence to "Now free, after escaping the bonds of Azkaban..." It just makes the break in time clearer.

Also, I understand this is a one shot but I think it would work better if you put more information on how Sirius escaped rather than listing what he'd done.

You do have a good story, I hope my review helped any.

Author's Response: Thank you for your review.
I like getting constructive critisim as it helps to make my writing better.
I agree that there should be more information. I read through the story not so long ago and realised just how much I felt it needed to be edited.
Most of my stories that I've read through, I feel need to be edited, so I won't be able to edit them all. And I also feel that if I leave it in the original form, I can see how I've grown as a writer from year to year. As 'One Shot' was one of the stories I enjoyed writing, I will probably go back and edit it at some point. This is because whenever I read it, it will probably annoy me.
Lollie :D

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Aw, that was great! I really enjoyed all of the descriptions here. You illustrate a perfect picture for your readers! That's wonderful. :)

Really, I enjoyed it very much! I'm so glad you entered the challenge with this fic! Be sure to drop by the thread in a week or so to see who the winner is!
10/10
- Rin

Author's Response: I really enjoyed writing this story and I'm glad I entered your challenge or this story might never have been written. I'm known to have several plots running amok that never get written. I love the fact that you enjoyed reading it.

I will drop by!
Lollie :D

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