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Reading Reviews for Crush
11 Reviews Found

Review #1, by lunarocks14 Crush

13th October 2010:
Haha. I love it.

Okay. Gray-Box, hello! I like this story, don't you? Yes, it is amazing. I do love it. Huh? Yeah, Ron/Hermione is awesome and sweet. Yes... awesome. I give it 10/10!

That was my side of the conversation with Gray-Box ^ :D. I like him. :)

Author's Response: I like him too! xD

Thanks so much for reviewing! :D


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Review #2, by VampireKisses Crush

24th February 2010:
Hi, emmapotter! It's me, Kristen again with your review. Aww, I just want to say that your review response made me so very happy that you were happy and that I got you smiling! Even though I said I didn't want to read Trio-at-Hogwarts stories (since their story has been chronicled by Rowling already) I got to say I love Ron/Hermione. Always have, always will (which that, and a few other key factors, is why I HATE Harmony so much.) But this was a cute little story ^_^.
The lyrics of the song fit the mood of the story very well, and vice versa.

Although I do have to say that I sort of thought that the voice you used as Hermione's was a bit...off, personally speaking :(. It sounded just a tad bit more like Lavender Brown or Padma Patil than Hermione. I mean, I perfectly get you were conveying she was a girl in love (hell, I'm a girl very much like Hermione in manner and tastes and I'd probably react the same way as you portrayed, so kudos on making it relatable!) but all the "really really really"s and "Today was definitely...will not believe what happened" and other colloquialisms just didn't strike me as something Hermione Granger would say. Perhaps if she was either more awe-struck and at a loss for words, it would sit more right. I've always sort of seen Hermione as a VERY smart girl, but when it comes to two things - sports and boys - she's clueless. I like how you had that element of confusion with Ron's signals though! It made it more real.

The flow was fine ^_^, nothing to worry about there - I liked how it was little scenes we Ron/Hermione shippers have come to love! But I would have liked to have seen her reaction to Viktor Krum, since he did ask her to the Ball and Ron didn't. It would have added another layer to her, I think :). There was one sentence you could have cut from the fiction though because it just seemed so out of place and a bit of a bump. The one where Hermione talks about how Harry has changed etc. etc.; Harry just sort of popped out of nowhere and didn't really come back afterwards, so to smooth things out I'd recommend just cutting that part out completely :D. Also, the "After the Attack" paragraph is very good but you have some conventional errors; whenever a new person speaks, they have their own paragraph. With everything pushed together, it sort of made the scene a little cluttered :).

This was a very nice little pick-me-up after working on Sociology papers and dramatic Coming of Age memoirs, thanks!


Author's Response: Yes, when I wrote this, I was a Lavender Brown/Parvati Patil kind of girl, and re-reading, even I find it so not Hermione! But, when I get the time, I'll go back and change it! :)
Thanks for the crit! I'm in love with the way you review! It's so sweet! :) I'm requesting for another, right now, when I saw this review! :rollseyes:
I think I will add Krum's part though, he deserves that.he made Ron/Hermione more spicy! :P And more obvious too! :)

When I wrote this, about three years back, I think, I was very very young, about fourteen, and I honestly had no clue what I was doing, so this has got to be one of my worse ones! :-| I wil work on the little details you pointed out though! Thanks for that!
Glad yo could find time to give such a detailed review! I love it when people do that!

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Review #3, by kandekisses Crush

20th February 2010:
Hello Dear!

Well that was a very cute one-shot. I'm not really that big of a Ron/Hermione fan. I tend to lean towards Dramione's even if its not realistic lol. But this was cute.

I loved how you showed moments in her life that were significant to her feelings for Ron. The only suggestion I have is to maybe elaborate a bit more on the events, like more detail.

But yes, thanks for the nice read. I think I'm going to have to go find this song and listen to it. It tied in really good.

Very nicely done!

Author's Response: Aww. Thanks so much for the review!
I'm glad you liked R/Hr!
This is one of my first pieces so it's not that good. :)
I'll work on description, which I'm kind of scared of attempting since I ramble, so yeah. :P
Anyway, I'm writing a Dramione at the mo', so I'll request for you once it's up!
Thanks again

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Review #4, by chocolatelover314 Crush

19th February 2010:
*waves* I'm here as requested!!!

Okay, first things first: I LOVE Ron/Hermione!! Even though back in the day I used to ship Harmoine? (Harry/Hermione) this one-shot was so cute! Except I was a bit confused with the time jump. You should focus on just one year or something, because it confused me!

Anyway, does Hermione confess her love to Ron or not? ACK ACK ACK! I really wanted to know! Even though I know they end up marrying. (Possible sequel??? Hmm??)

Good with grammar and spelling, and I love Hermione in this story!


~Chocolatelover314 aka chocolateliz314~

Author's Response: Thanks so much for the review!

I don't know. I think Ron realised that he loved Hermione before Hermione could do anything about it! (DH!)
The time jump shows Hermione's feelings throughout the series which we read from Harry's POV, so it would be different take. Oh well, I'll work on making stuff like that clearer! :)
Thanks again for reviewing!

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Review #5, by Grapeback Crush

18th February 2010:
Dear, I must say that I like this story. A lot.

The plot was fantastic. Even though we have all (hopefully) read the HP books, it was from Harry’s perspective…not Hermione’s. As we travel from the beginning of the Yule Ball to The Final Battle, Ron and Hermione’s relationship takes tips and turns, even though we know their relationship will survive. The PoV was really nice. It wasn’t third person like it normally is, and we were allowed a little more insight into Hermione’s mind. Great job! It was on spot and I loved how the attitude was volatile and always changing. One minute she’s excited at the prospect of a relationship with Ron, and the next she’s fighting with him, hoping for it all to be over. Kudos!

Some people might try to diss Hermione, which they SHOULDN’T! It was completely spot on; I don’t care what anyone else says. Yes, Hermione is a bloody genius, but she is also a teenage girl who likes teenage girl things. There is more depth to Hermione than most people think, and you captured that with grace and intricate beauty. Throughout school, she hid behind layers of her logic because she was scared that being a Muggle-Born would make her not fit in (Hermione can be a rule-breaking, cool kid when she wants to be). Her thought processes were totally beautiful. Good job.

My only critique is that you don’t really show us what’s happening. While I lurve the thought you put into Hermione, it would be clearer if you added more detail, description, and dialogue. You can’t go wrong with it, and it would add life to the story. Perhaps some speaking lines between Ron and Hermione ;)

Besides this and some occasional typos (there was once when you left the ‘d’ off of and), I have no critique. I like what you did it and am definitely adding it to my favourites :)

If only there were more!


Author's Response: OMG! Thanks so much for the awesome review!
I'm stunned! I think of this as one of my worse works, I honestly was very young when I wrote this, like 14 or 15! Now when I read it I go like, 'Whoa! Did I ever write like this? EW!'
I'm my own worst critic and I'm very very harsh on myself! :P
Okay, that was random and wonder why I started rambling like that?! :P
Anyway, on to your review!
Thank you so so so much for such an amazing, I feel so much better about my writing right now! (I apparently have very low self-esteem, which turns out to be true. Damn, I'm rambling AGAIN! :sweat:)
I think Hermione is a great character to write as she seems so perfect but is so so flawed! I mean, she's a goody two shoes most of the time they're at Hogwarts but when it came to Harry and Ron she was anything but that! Talk about double standards! :P

As for more dialogue, I'm working on it. I suck horribly at dialogue.(though I LOVE talking, as you can see) Details, details. That's what I get most of the time! I'll work on that too!
Typos, ah, the bane of my existence. Since I've been writing fanfiction for a while, my typing speed has increased and so has the number of typos! :P I'll work on that too though!
Thanks for the encouraging(that's the word I was looking for!) and sweet revie that you've left me!
Hugs, (and cyber cookies and milk)

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Review #6, by Ilovefred Crush

22nd January 2010:
Nice Story. I normally am not a huge fan of Song-Fiction but this was great nice job!

Author's Response: Great that you liked it!

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Review #7, by saffy22100 Crush

7th January 2010:
aww that is sooo sweet!

i really like how this is written out. keep writing!



Author's Response: Yes, yes, I will!
Keep writing that is! It's great reviewers like you that keep me going! :)
thanks for stopping by!

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Review #8, by mhgdthfyu Crush

20th December 2009:
Yeah this story is great!

Author's Response: thanks! :)

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Review #9, by whisky Crush

18th December 2009:
i like it. i like it alot. specially cuz we never rly get to see how hermione feels, ya know?

Author's Response: Thank you so so much :) and yes, I KNOW..thats why I wrote this piece.. :)

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Review #10, by kkevv Crush

27th June 2009:
I was a pretty well wirtten piece, but I think you need to learn to show, not tell. Even if we are in Hermione's mind, there are ways of letting us see what she is thinking

Author's Response: I'll keep that in mind. :)
Thank you for the review! :)

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Review #11, by Harry and Ginny Crush

22nd March 2009:
cute fic. This was very interesting to read. keep up the good work.^_^


Harry and Ginny

Author's Response: OMG!! Thank You so much! I really appreciate the review!

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