sad but great keep writing please!Author's Response: thnx i know its sad but all snape/lily fics r glad 2 know u liked it XD Report Review
OMG ILY. Like, seriously. T~TAuthor's Response: oh wow thnx sooo much lol made my day Report Review
This is such a heartwrenching love. I absolutely adore Severus/Lily fanfictions. Your descriptions are beautifully done. I especially like how it ended with Severus smashing the rock. Excellent imagery and use of figure of speech. Unrequited love is extremely painful and I think that you portrayed that wonderfully. Great work!Author's Response: wow thnk u 4 ur lovely review it was very thoughtful, i 2 am a fan of sev/lily ficz (obviously) i find them so sad but so beautiful in a cruel way n i thought id give it a whiz im glad u liked it so much thnx again XD Report Review
Well can't say I'm much of a fan of Snape/Lily, guess I just don't really empathise with Snape at all -shrugs-
With that said, this is really nicely written. I think you captured Snapes bitterness and anger at the world nicely. On one note, Lucius wasn't actually at school with them, during the time you're writing. Also, I always imagined Snape as a bit of a loner.
It's worth checking your grammar over, just to get rid of small mistakes like "James potter".
You convey emotion very well though, would have been interesting to see this increased to a short-story/novella but it works nicely as a one-shot =]Author's Response: yer lol i've alwayz felt sorry for him
in most parts he's a loner but other parts it has him sticking to crowds lik Mulciber and all of them so i included that
i did toy with the idea that i should make it longer but in the end i left it as one-shot
thnx for the review i appreciate it an for the grammer quip in one of ur stories u did that and typed he instead of the lol i think it was finally i cant remember Report Review
awww poor james :( lily needs to give that boy another chance!! lol. great storyAuthor's Response: hey lol its snape not James lol still thnx 4 reading it XD
awe, lately i've been really into Severus/Lily pairings *shrugs* I don't know why...this was nice, you could of added a bit more detail in some parts, just to make it slow down and a bit longer for the reader as it seemed to go by really quickly.
Also, I thought Severus was a loner and got bullied and picked on by the Marauders and so the only person to stick up for him was Lily. Also, at the end, when you say "Pain ...It defines the feeling. Of loving Lily Evans."- would it not be better of as-" Pain- it defines the feeling, of Loving Lily Evans."
but all-in-all it was a lovely read.Author's Response: i know wat u mean with snape/lily's some of them r good but u hv to able to empathise with snape to really lik them, thank you very much for reading it and for ur advice (which i will b taking into account) im glad u liked it XD Report Review
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