Reading Reviews for Dans Le Noir
  
51 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Little Blond Bellatrix Battle Grounds

27th June 2011:
Cute! I never suspected Pierre was a vampire. This novel was intresting and wonderful, as always.

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Review #2, by Shellee Battle Grounds

12th August 2010:
Awh, the two brothers are so precious. And Pierre! So, is he going to fall for a future Malfoy daughter then? Awh, that would actually be very very nice. I'm very curious and excited!
How much more awesome and sweet is Draco going to become in these stories? I love it!

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Review #3, by Shellee Mon Dieu

12th August 2010:
Awh, Pierre is claustrophobic. He's such an adorable thing. And so helpful! I hope they'll find out soon enough what's going on.. Those orbs seem rather nice!

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Review #4, by Shellee Sang Juenes

12th August 2010:
I have always liked Pierre. And there's so much one can do with vampires. Its amazing. I never thought it was him, though. He doesn't seem that bad.

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Review #5, by Shellee Of Dark Wizards and Dark Deeds

12th August 2010:
How I love the interaction between them all. Draco's concern. And Scorpius is such a doll. I wish I could keep him for myself. I do wonder why the sudden interest in naming their second son after Snape. They're such a great team. Amazing team. Even the anger fueled between them at times just sparks up.

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Review #6, by Shellee A Lost Bet Becomes Severus

12th August 2010:
I'm glad their relationship is still as happy as ever. Although I expected it. They're the perfect couple, and have the perfect baby. Scorpius is absolutely adorable, not wanting his bottle.
I wonder what's going on with Scorpius. Draco can sense everything about him, right? But if it were their baby, wouldn't Hermione see something as well?
UGH MICKEY! Why is he still around? Seriously, the twit. When is he going to stop coming between them? And why hasn't Draco even bothered to look anything up about him yet? Especially now with Lucius back in their graces. Poor Draco.
Awh, he is so adorable with his son. I don't like Mickey, blargh.
Hermione certainly has adapted to the Malfoy cunning and deviousness, that's for sure! Yay for a brother, though.

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Review #7, by ravenclaw_princess Battle Grounds

31st January 2010:
That was a nice ending to a moderately brutal story. There were some parts, especially around the battle scene that I thought needed some expansion but over all it was a nicely written chapter. The part with Lucius and Scorpius was nice, and the discussion of Draco's and Hermione's about life after death was really good. Well done. I can't wait to read further.

Author's Response: Thank you. That was my tribute to mystery and horror. Admittedly, action in a story to read and write is no where near as good as watching it in a movie. I am all about the fifteen minute sword fight or car chase. I just had to mix Lucius with a poopy diaper because I see him as not having done that with Draco but assigning it to Dobby. The life after death will come later on. The next one is comedy with implied slash but not really.

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Review #8, by ravenclaw_princess Mon Dieu

31st January 2010:
nice chapter. I liked the humour throughout it, especially the foot massage part.

Author's Response: Thank you. I love innuendo.

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Review #9, by ravenclaw_princess Sang Juenes

8th January 2010:
That was a good chapter. I always like it when they link back to previous stories. I also like the humour surrounding the 'horror movie' scene.

Well done.

Author's Response: Thank you. Scooby Doo totally inspired that one.

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Review #10, by ravenclaw_princess Of Dark Wizards and Dark Deeds

8th January 2010:
A vampire.interesting.

I can see where this story is heading now. After reading further I understand what was going on in the first chapter but it has also made the events of the first chapter seem a little detached. It just didn't seem to flow as nicely as this chapter has.

Draco seemed to over react in this chapter when he revealed his suspicions. I think with a little more internal monologue of what is going on in the characters minds, their reactions might not seem so dramatic.

There were some really comical lines though in this chapter which made me crack up. Nice work. And I want to know who this vampire is so I'm going to keep reading.

Author's Response: Thank you. This story is ear-marked for a rewrite. I think some things need to be added. Your input is really helping me with the ideas to plot out and lengthen the mystery.

For the one liners, Joss Whedon with Buffy and all really influenced me in that. He made me really that great dialog along with the plot of course can really make a difference. Until him, I cannot think of a whole lot of shows or books which contained much.



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Review #11, by ravenclaw_princess A Lost Bet Becomes Severus

8th January 2010:
That was an interesting first chapter. I'm not entirely sure where things are heading with this story yet though but I'm sure I will work it out soon enough.

I thought Hermione completely over reacted to what Mickey Said. I would have thought that she has spent enough time with Draco and Lucius to not so easily fall for his manipulations. I know she was annoyed with Draco at the time from keeping his thoughts from her, but this hardly seems like enough reason to for her to leave him like she did. I think some expansion is needed with this to make Hermione's reaction seem a little less over the top.

It was a nicely written chapter though and now I am off to read the next one.

Author's Response: Thank you. There are some ideas to expand and an inner monolog is a great idea. With Hermione, I will expound it is hormones and Mickey has a secret ability that will be revealed in New York and it will all make sense. Purposefully, I left that vague so that the reader will be ignorant as well as the character. To add to it, I think when she comes back, I will have her comment more and be completely dumbfounded as to why she ever fell for his words.

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Review #12, by NessaTelemnar Mon Dieu

4th January 2010:
Hahaha, - I can not believe you can do both of us at once. -
Brilliant :D

Nina x

Author's Response: Thank you. I love inuendo.

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Review #13, by alannalove2009 Battle Grounds

26th September 2009:
AW!!! I love this!! =]!! i love how the two lines with cross! YAY!

Author's Response: Thank you. You will see that evident even more.

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Review #14, by alannalove2009 Mon Dieu

26th September 2009:
OMG vampires YAY! im so happy right now!! =]

Author's Response: Thank you. Keep Pierre in mind for later chaps.

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Review #15, by alannalove2009 Sang Juenes

26th September 2009:
thamk God he didnt eat draco. hermionie would have died.

Author's Response: Thank you. You shall see.

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Review #16, by alannalove2009 Of Dark Wizards and Dark Deeds

26th September 2009:
OMG!! who is a vampire?!? i love you. my twilight side is so happy now!

Author's Response: thank you. check out fiction central for my original vamp fics

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Review #17, by alannalove2009 A Lost Bet Becomes Severus

26th September 2009:
i love this story SO much! absolutely amazing! =]

Author's Response: Thank you.

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Review #18, by ghostwriter1030 A Lost Bet Becomes Severus

26th June 2009:
Hi, it ChellDaBelle1030 here *waves*

I decided to review this in the end. I cannot resist vampires at all. My apologies for being rude. But on to the story.

Well, I fear that I am a bit confused as to everything that is going on. I believe that I might have to start from the very beginning to grasp the true nature of this piece. I see you have a series going on, I plan to start at the beginning.

But ,this first chapter was well written and I like the interaction between Draco and Hermione. If you don't mind, which story should I start with to begin the entire series?

Author's Response: Thank you. I would be quite honored. Note any reference to Pierre so you can spot the clues. I am quite subtle on that. There are a few other odd characters throughout as well. I hope you enjoy.

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Review #19, by Liana Battle Grounds

23rd June 2009:
Once again I'm crying happy tears. I loved the scenes of Lucius babysitting and changing diapers. The short exchange between Pierre and Lucius was great. I liked the description of the vampires fighting--that was very creative.

So is Pierre's sister the green-eyed youngster from early on in your writing?

Author's Response: Thank you. I laughed writing that. Lucius hates Pierre for many reasons but most of all bc he gets the last word in. In my Founders tale - you will see Pierre's ancestor. More fighting and the green eyed girl is yet to come in Of Wine and Revenge.

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Review #20, by Liana Mon Dieu

23rd June 2009:
The foot massage part was hysterical. What made you think of that? Wouldn't Arthur Weasley love the car ride? I liked how Draco compared it to riding a broom, with the broom being more exciting. The stereotypical, flirtatious French vampire is a hoot.

Author's Response: Thank you. A guy I know loved to give foot massages and he was a flirt. My bf saw it and flipped. The car chase was my tribute to the best car chase ever in an old movie called Bullitt. Yes - Arthur would have loved it. Pierre is my tribute to Frenchmen that I have met - arrogant but flirtatious.

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Review #21, by Liana Sang Juenes

23rd June 2009:
That was an interesting take on vampires--that they prefer the company of artists and scholars. I never thought of it that way.

I hope this isn't too personal, but what do you do for your day job? Is writing something you do for recreation or is it your profession?

Author's Response: Thank you. I just thought that if I lived for thousands of years, I would want the company of folks who were brilliant.

I am an executive assistant by trade. Writing is recreation for me. Thought of one day doing something professional.


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Review #22, by Liana Of Dark Wizards and Dark Deeds

23rd June 2009:
Interesting! I just want to keep on reading. I love seeing Lucius and family doing research just like they're a regular academic family.

Are there going to be any legal problems with you using JKR's characters?

Author's Response: Thank you. For fan fiction they have a disclaimer here.

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Review #23, by Liana A Lost Bet Becomes Severus

23rd June 2009:
Loved it! I was teary eyed again. Even though Draco was a "prat" in the books I always kind of liked him. It's nice to see his character grow so much. I have my usual criticisms: Watch spelling (I do a lot of editing so I'm a stickler for spelling) and there are some parts I think could use some building up--but I think you said you would do that eventually.

Author's Response: Thank you. I always felt sorry for DM bc he had to feel unloved to turn out the way he was. Plus the way Lucius acted it wouldn't be hard to believe. Both Harry and Draco had bad home lives but in different ways and one turned out for the better.

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Review #24, by Jellyman Battle Grounds

21st May 2009:
You're stories are so creative - the only thing I can suggest is EXPANSION! Desperately - you could go into so much detail for such a complex plot! Haha, but excellent work as per usual :)

Just one suggestion about your writing style: you tend to say things point blank, rather than building up. Building up creates tension which makes reading more interesting (though your stories are already interesting, what with the creative plots). I don't really know how to put this so I'll use an example:

From this (Lucius' internal monologue): I can do this. Besides, I can use gloves and a mask, since this is a hospital.

To this: I can do this. All I need is gloves...and a mask. Surely there's something like that around here? Or something to that effect.

I'm not trying to criticize your writing, I enjoy it immensely, I'm merely suggesting improvements - please don't take it the wrong way :(

Anyway, I really liked it! I loved the interaction between Pierre and Lucius - maybe we could get a one-shot of the ball? *hinthint* Haha, but, anyway, I hoped I've helped you out a little :)

Author's Response: Thank you. I'll definitely expound on that in the near future. It has to do with the war and dealing with death. On those two Pierre is more the physical while Gizelle is more mental so he could not achieve the sleep -€“ ADD of sorts but that is a great idea. Those two have a very elaborate background. While I won't tell their story in this one I'll give some clues. You already see Pierre's Closterphobia but there he also has a bizarre quirk that has a perfect explanation while Gizelle won't go near a corpse but I'll leave the why a surprise.

Thank you. Expansion noted - yes I am unafraid of a complex plot. In fact, I prefer them. Pierre and Lucius interact more in Of Wine and Revenge. The ball is in Mon Ange. Pierre also appears in Worthy and Wedding Jitters.


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Review #25, by Jellyman Mon Dieu

21st May 2009:
Why did the elder's suggest Pierre's sister sleep? You have a tendency to elaborate on things (like Pierre playing with Scorpius) not vital to the plot and not going into enough detail about things that are. While this isn't necessarily a bad thing, it's something to consider when you're expanding :)

I do like Pierre though - his flirting with Narcissa really is funny and Lucius is comical :D

Author's Response: Thank you. On vampires, I borrowed some elements on RPG's as well. DLN - Dance in the Dark and Sang Juene is blood relation. Did you see my subtle tribute to Scooby Doo and horror movies when they first go in there?

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