Reading Reviews for Strange and Beautiful
  
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Review #1, by musicgirlhp14 Prologue

9th November 2008:
You have a pretty interesting plot line here. However there are a quite a few spots where the wording is awkward. For example Astoria says, "Well...I suppose it's because I don't like what people see in me and my family." It's not very fluent, you may want to say something like: "Well, I suppose the idea came to me because I was growing tired to the way people viewed my family." It sounds a little more dignified and flows better. Just go over what you've written and say it out loud to yourself and you'll be able to catch little things like that. Great story so far, it will be interesting to see where this goes.
~Alex

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