Fairly interesting chapter, I must say. I absolutely love Bette's character so far; again, she's not Mary-Sue-ish. I would just like to know more about her personality. I also like Ron and Hermione's first reactions to her. They weren't all extremely nice to her just because she's an OC, but rather themselves.
It's cool how this story is sort being parallel to Half-Blood Prince. So, I'm guessing Tonks knows about her visions and such too? Does the whole Order know too?
This was definitely my favorite part in the chapter:
"And he's quite good-looking," she said in an observational tone. "Don't you think?" Her gaze settled on Bette.
Bette bit her bottom lip, ordering herself not to smile. She turned and leant closer to her seatmate, as if examining him. "Hmm, yes. I can see where you might think that. Well done, Harry."
ROTFL, funny stuff... :) Overall, nicely done, I'll be waiting for chapter 3!Author's Response: Thank you again for your incredibly constructive review!
Yes, I am aiming this to be parallel to Half-Blood Prince. Obviously, I will be changing some event so things that I dreamed up will be able to happen.
And I didn't mention this in my first response, but I am so appreciative that you don't think Bette is a Mary-Sue, because I am always in total dread of creating one. So I'm glad she's passing... so far. :D Report Review
Nice chapter. I'll definately be checking back for more.Author's Response: Thank you so much for leaving a review! I'm so glad you're interested. The scene from chapter one just sort of appeared in my head one day while I was driving and I was wondering how I could get there - thus the story was born. I'm glad you'll be back, and I hope that you keep liking everything! Report Review
Nice start. I'll be moving the the next chapter now. Report Review
I really really like this. REALLY. :) I love how you've made this Harry/OC fic so different, in a way that I can't even imagine Bette being a Mary-Sue. The hostility at in this chapter has really peeked my interest. I mean, what is up with those two? It's weird seeing Harry so hateful; I suppose I'll find out why he is in the later chapters.
I didn't see any mistakes at all. And I've this to my favorites, so you know. :)Author's Response: Thank so so incredibly much! I've never started a story in the middle before, but it's very exciting because, as you said, little by little I get to let the story come from it's real beginning... to this sort of hostile!Harry. So what's made him this way?
I guess you'll find out. :D
And thank you for the favorite, by the way. It means a lot. Report Review
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