A very good start to your writing career, but concentrate on your chapter separation. 1whocares Report Review
really good chapter, but when Fred told George how he loves his family, he did not mention Ron. Still having problems with chapter separation. 1whocares. Report Review
Excellent, the Resurrection Stone. Good solution. 1whocares. Report Review
George is in really bad shape. Hope he gets over it. 1whocares. Report Review
Another good chapter, but you need to break up the paragraphs. 1whocares. Report Review
Not a bad start. 1whocares. Report Review
i liked the story alot please keep up the good workAuthor's Response: Thanks for your kind words, Milady.
I am delighted that you liked my little story. I do hope that you will read, and like my other stories just as much.
Robert Report Review
Ok Robert, now it is your turn.
I absolutely loved it! I have always loved George's character (as you already knew). This was such a good story. I loved how you used the Resurrection Stone to help George find the way again.
I have always been a Twin/Angelina fan as well :)
Emily GailAuthor's Response: Thanks Emily. I am so glad that you liked the story. Oddly enough, I dreamt the entire story one night, and wrote it when I woke up. To me, it was a natural.
Robert Report Review
This is a very good story and one that actually I am sure anyone who has lost a loved one can totally relate to. Nice job and keep up the good work I look forward to seeing more stories from youAuthor's Response: Davis, thank you for the kind words.
I am glad that you liked the story. I have one other completed story up, called "Loss" and another three in the works. "The Third Kind Of Magic" and "Penance" are on hold, for the moment. I am spending my time on "The Trial Of Vernon E. Dursley". It will remain the main focus of my writing until completed.
So, if you like, check them out.
Robert Report Review
Wow, what a great story and what a great chapter. I always wondered how George woul cope and come along with the death of Fred. Your story is very believable and I cried my eyes off. I think you are a great writer.
I especially like the idea with the stone.
And I liked the idea of Fred and Dumbledore as Pranksters in the afterlife ;)Author's Response: WOW! Thanks! >BLUSH<
I'm so glad that you liked my story.
As for Fred and Albus, Can you picture them as Dueling Pranksters? :-)
I can, and it scares me! >ROFL<
Robert Report Review
OMG. I was on the floor laughing. The image of a bunch of drunks oooing and ahhhing at fire works while they played in the snow was hilarious. Very good ending to a very good story. ^_^ ^_^ ^_^! I'm kinda sad it's over but it did have a good and happy ending, so I'm happy to say i do not have to chuck my computer through the wall! Yay! but the prospect of Fred with another woman, even if they are dead, haunts (no pun intended) me in my sleep. I'm beginning to think I have too much of an unnatural obssesion with Fred... hehehe.
Another random story suggestion but I'm in the mood to think about Fred; my friend and I have a story called "Truths Behind Facades" it's actually, in my opinion very good, so if you'd like to check it out... oh, it's the sequal to "Unraveling the Past", but that's only 4 chapters long and it's completed, so you might want to read that first... sorry, I'm rambling...
Once again very beautiful story! Oh and thanks for the review, chapter 2 is in validation now^_^.Author's Response: So, I take it that you liked the story, and how it turned out? :-)
Seriously though, I am really glad that you liked it. It came out better than I had hoped, especially for a first effort.
I'll check out that story tomorrow evening. It's late, and I have to go to work early in the morning. UGH!
Thanks again for your nice review. Report Review
I didn't reveiw for the other chapters,but now I will.This is a sweet story.NICE!Luved it.Author's Response: Thank you so much! It was an easy, fun story to write, because I knew before I started it that it would have a happy ending.
My next story, "Loss", is not going to be quite so pleasant, but it's one that needs to be written, I believe. I hope that you like it as well. Report Review
Aw, so cute. You can do it Georgie!
You know that I love your story very much, but there is just one thing I cannot stand for. WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY FRED SAYING HE HAS SOMEONE TO LOVE?!! Unless it's me, I'm sorry but I can't stand for that! ^_^ JK, JK. A very good chapter. I really enjoyed it and was very happy that you found a way to incorperate Fred into it. 100/10! (I usually don't ask this but maybe you can check out my story "Keys"? It's mature, but just for language^_^) Once again, wonderful!Author's Response: I'm delighted that you like it, Megan. But I'm sorry that I gave Fred someone to love in the "hereafter", but I feel that everyone should have love in their lives. (Or deaths, in this case.)
Love is something that we all need, and must have in order to survive.
I'm in the process of reading your story now, and I'll be sure to leave a review.
Oh, and tomorrow, I'll try to post a complete story, called "Loss".
HINT: Have plenty of Kleenex handy! :-) Report Review
FRED!!! One of my fictional loves! Very good (like always!). I'm off to read the next chapter! 100/10!Author's Response: Thanks. Enjoy it!
The last chapter is awaiting validation, so you should be able to read it tomorrow.
Thanks for the response! And, yes, I do really like the story, and look forward to reading more! I will also be sure to read the other stories when they come out. Keep it up!Author's Response: Thanks, Heather. I am delighted that you like it. I just uploaded the next chapter for validation, and according to the page, validation time is about 13 hours. so you should be able to read it by tomorrow.
I never knew until now, how much pleasure writing gives me, and how much enjoyment I get from everyones reviews.
Thanks to all. Report Review
I noticed that it says the story is completed, but it kind of ends abruptly. is it really done or were you planning on adding more chapters later when the site accepts them again?Author's Response: Heather, that was a screw-up on my part. I misunderstood what the submission form was asking me, so I marked it as "Complete", which it most certainly is not. There are another 3 chapters yet to go. As soon as the quque re-opens, I'll submit Chapter 4.
I hope that you like what I have written so far, and if you did, I really think you'll like what follows.
BTW, I also have two completed short stories that I will submit as soon as I am permitted to do so.
Thanks for your comments, and allowing me to explain my mistake. Report Review
Interesting. When did Fred talk to Harry? I'm dying to find out.
Keep writing.Author's Response: The night before he visited George. There, now you won't die because of this story.
Feel better now? :-)
As soon as chapters are allowed to be uploaded for validation, I'll put up the next chapter. For some reason, it appears that this won't happen until the first of next month.
So, hang in there, WF, and please don't give up on this story.
Thanks for the comments. Report Review
Okay, I'm gonna need a floatation device soon, the river is swelling quite rapidly. Beautiful chapter^_^! I can't wait to read more, but I know that it'll take awhile (stinkin queue closer). Random bit here but yesterday I saw that it only had a one day wait so I hurried up and typed a whole long chapter of a new story, it took me 4 hours of straight typing, only to go on and find that it was closed! Major lacking of enough common sense to read the big bolded phrase, QUEUE CLOSER . Enough random rambling, I'm sorry. Once again Marvelous chapter! I loved it, 100/10.Author's Response: It's THAT good? >shock< :-)
I'm really glad that you like it.
Well, there are only 2 chapters left, and if they ever allow me to post the next chapter, I will.
What the heck is the deal with this?
Anyway, the next chapter is the key chapter, and will bring the story to a head.
So stay tuned to Potterwatch for all the details!!
Thanks for you comments. They mean a lot to me as an aspiring writer. Report Review
Aww. Poor George! Even though his actual character wasn't in this chapter I still find myself crying a river for him. And by golly I sure hope Harry's plan works. Please update soon! Oh, and a kinda random tidbit, on the story's description it says COMPLETED, don't know if that's intentional or not but I just figured I'd point it out. Once again, wonderful story! 100/10!Author's Response: I'm updating as rapidly as the site allows me to. The next chapter is awaiting validation right now. And yes, I made a mistake when I noted the story as complete. The story has been written, but the final chapters haven't yet been posted.
And if I can make you "cry a river" for George, then I must be a better writer than I thought! >LOL<
But if you cry now, wait until you read my next story! :-)
Thanks for the review, and the rating. You just made my day. Report Review
Well written with good characters in canon. I wonder what Harry's plan is.
Keep writing.Author's Response: Thank you. I actually dreamed this story, and wrote it in one evening. (!) The 3rd chapter is awaiting validation, and I think that you will be a bit surprised. At least, I hope you be.
Actually, this was an easy story to write. I have a couple of more surprises in the next couple of chapters, so stay tuned! Report Review
great build-up, can't wait to see what happens nextAuthor's Response: Thanks, Laurinda. I think you'll like it. I hope so, anyway. :-) Report Review
For a first chapter of your first story this was good. George is going to feel Fred's death for the rest of his life, and just like in real life you do not get over things in a hurry.
I am looking forward to seeing how things progress.Author's Response: Thanks for your kind words.
Naturally, a twin is far more likely to feel the loss of his twin more intensely than a non-twin sibling, and this is what I wanted to explore.
I'm glad that you like the story so far, and will like the rest of the story as much. Report Review
no! poor george! i felt so bad for him after deathly hallows (poor fred, too. i cried) i really like how you're doing this from the end about george, i hope it has a happy ending though, because after the death of fred i threw my book at the wall, and i don't think im strong enough to throw my computer, nor would it go over well with the folks so... well yeah. wonderful story i can't wait to see where it's going!Author's Response: Oh, I think that you'll really like how the story winds up.
Please, don't throw your computer at the wall! How would you read the rest of the story if you did that? :-)
I felt that how George dealt with the death of his twin was being ignored or just glossed over by everyone, so I decided to do a little in-depth study into this emotional black hole.
Thanks for the review. Chapter 2 has been posted, and is just awaiting validation. Report Review
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