Wow. Best story ever.Author's Response: Short and sweet, but thank you! Report Review
You know what? Having reviewed 'Love Rhymes..' last night, I've realised that you've written loads of stories that I really like. Favourite author-ing? Think so.Author's Response: Thank you!!! :D You've just made my entire week! I'm so happy you liked my stories :) Report Review
Okay, I've decided that this is canon.In my mind, forever, this will be how it all happened properly. Excellent job, absolutely excellent oneshot...wonderful writing...I'm not absolutely convinced about the Sirius/Lily bit -but I suppose that's because I have her exhalted on to this virtuous pedestal that perhaps is a little unrealistic... wonderful writing, I look forward to reading more from you Thanks very much xxAuthor's Response: Oh wow! Well, thank you! Glad you thought it was canon. It's funny, I'm not even a Lily/Sirius shipper; this was sort of just a challenge for myself. Ah, Lily. I'm not sure even I'm convinced about that bit. Maybe one day I'll try to re-write it and see what I come up with XD Thanks for the review! Report Review
Oh the guilt. It's one thing to be in love with you're best friend's wife, another to sleep with her... but to be on your way to confess you're sins to find that they have been murdered, ow. If only Lilly had stayed with him a few hours longer she would have still been alive... but Harry wouldn't have.. no one would have been there to give their life for him...
A very well written story, the only CC I have is to watch (adjust) your spacing... the large gapes between sentances is a little distracting... and when you have numbers in a story (ie: 5 minutes) it is often better to write the word out (ie: five minutes)
All in all a wonderful read :)
~Moon~Author's Response: Thanks for the review :) Glad you liked! It's not exactly my best work; it fact I think it's definitely the worst hahaha. But glad you found something you liked about it. I'll be sure to fix the spacing no it; I haven't even looked at it for a while but I will tonight! Thanks again! Report Review
Great story. Firstly i would like to tell you all the good things and then come to the bad parts lol I loved the way you gave the details. The way you expressed Lily and Sirius's feelings was amazing.
Secondly your writing is amazing though you have little grammatical and punctuation mistakes that you need to correct.
Thirdly i found this story not very convincing ... i know this is fanfic but i think it was a little hard to convince me like ...
-You created such suspense of not telling the name of the "Woman" Sirius was with until the very end when you already have the pairing as S/L so i didn't really think that was necessary but still i loved the dramatic effect it gave. :)
-Also Lily and Sirus having an affair ... behind James back after Harry being born is a bit unrealistic to me at least because I always James and Lily will always have a happy.
-The plot line was actually a little unconvincing because i doubt Lily would risk her and her son's [before the night of their death when they were supposed to be in hiding] only to go and sleep with her husband's best friend.
Sorry for being harsh though the story is a little unconvincing... it is good and it was so sad. I especially loved this line "She grabbed my hips and I took that as a signal; a signal I knew all too well" that killed it lol
All in all an entertaining story 8/10Author's Response: Haha, yes, I'm not shining with pride on this story. This is the first dramatic piece I've ever written in my life, and I thought I did a ridiculously awful job. I'm glad you found at least two things you liked about it; frankly even that shocked me hahaha. But thanks so much for leaving a review nonetheless. Report Review
Oh my God. This was beautiful. I loved how you didn't state who the woman was until Sirius said," I love you for everything you make me feel. I love you for giving me so much hope that this war will end without even saying a word. I love you because when you look at me, I know you feel the same way I do. I love you for your lips, your eyes, your hair, your skin. I love you because you are unattainable. There are so many reasons why I love you and always will. I just… love you, Lily."
Aw. So gorgeous. I especially love how Sirius was going to go tell James about his affair with Lily, but how they had died, and how Peter had framed him. It all happened so fast, but it was definitely believable.
Excellent job. And this is on my favorites (too lol.) And yes, I am trying to read all your stories in one day - you ought to write more lol! Haha I'm joking. 10/10. You really are good at description. :)
~EstrellaAuthor's Response: Aw, wow thanks soo much! This story has been up for so long, and I thought it was complete rubbish because no one had ever reviewed it and I think I'm terrible at writing dramas. So glad you enjoyed it, it was very difficult to write. Thanks for wanting to actually read my stories! I'm very flattered! I'll have to return the favor :) Report Review
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