444 Reviews Found

Review #1, by gigi Planning and Quests

21st July 2015:
Every time I read a HP story whether JKR's or fanfic where they have to research something, I feel sorry that they don't have something like the internet and search engines, where answers are a click away. They may have faster ways of transportation, but with all the Muggleborns who have used the internet, can't they come up with a faster magical way of getting answers instead of spending days in the library?

And why do these kids not know about the Deathly Hallows? Was "Tales of Beedle the Bard" banned after the war? I thought all kids in the wizarding world would be familiar with the tale.

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Review #2, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap Caught

20th July 2015:
Albus was sitting in a dark empty room. A man in a dark cloak appeared next to him.

Iím telling you, Seer! They have something in that Potter blood. Iím convinced.

ďFine! I'll wait outside the door, but he will be punished!Ē

No, Washburn reminds me of nasty Umbridge. Lord knows how ol-Washy wants to punish Albus for real.

no one can come back from the dead.Ē

Never say never. Magic, you never know what it can do.

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Review #3, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap Mysteries

20th July 2015:
His dreams could be a foreshadowing of whatís to come, who knows, maybe Harry has some seer in him? I sort of thought so because yeah he had a connection to Voldemort as a Horcrux but you never know what other abilities he could have, sans Horcrux Harry. Maybe Iím thinking too much into it because it could just be nightmares from PTSD, which I strongly believe Harry would suffer from for a good portion of his adult life.

He set the professor on fire, thatís hilarious. Washburn (fitting, burn) reminds me of a teacher I had in middle school. She was so mean and used to yell at me for asking questions and not understanding the material that I became afraid to ask questions because of her and started to fear math. I legitimately have a math phobia and have struggled with it ever since then. It took a really amazing calculus teacher who was willing to spend numerous hours helping me to pass math in high school. Still though, the basics I cannot comprehend but I can do derivatives if you need me too. Haha. Anyway, I wonder whatís up with Washburn. Is it another Professor Quirrell or Snape we have on our hands? I canít even come up with a possible answer because Washburn isnít connected to Harry from the past so itís hard to say whatís the deal here.

I thought this was a really great chapter and I guess I spoke too soon about your dialogue and description because the writing was here in good olí chapter three.

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Review #4, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap A Big Surprise

20th July 2015:
Albus questions everything, when I was his age I know I did too but that was because I had anxiety and I worried about everything so I cried at the drop of a hat. Kind of like Albus but he has legitimate things to question and worry about. I was just a nervous kid.

Anyway, I liked the interaction between Albus and Harry. I thought it was great seeing him in father mode. James was great as well. Heís a little more at ease compared to Albus but I guess thatís because heís older. We donít really know if he struggled with the same things as his brother when he first started off at Hogwarts too.

So Matt is a werewolf. I knew it from the first time we met him.

Personally, I do think you need to work on your description and dialogue but I imagine since this is your first story youíve grown in that aspect. I know itís hard because we want to focus on our current work but sometimes itís great to show a little love to our original pieces. Itís just a suggestion!

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Review #5, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap The Sorting

20th July 2015:
It never hesitated for them. But it had for him. Albus stared glumly at his golden plate.

Because heís just like his fatherÖor is he? It would be such a twist if he was evil. No? Alright, alright.

Iím kind of surprised that he wouldnít have been sorted into Slytherin. For some reason my head canon is Slytherin but then again Iím working on a story post-Hogwarts and he says he was in Gryffindor.

ďDefense Against the Dark Arts,Ē the girl told him.

And so it begins. I wonder if Harry would have been aware of this and saw a missing DADA as a red flag but then again just because his scar doesnít twitch or whatever there are other evils out there.

I saw it coming that Harry was going to be asked to teach Defense, the most logical person because if something is happening for one, why wouldnít you want the Boy Who Lived to be there? It would be a plot twist if Harry is killed because the DADA position is cursed.

I did think this chapter was rather rushed though, especially when Harry was introduced into it. It kind of felt like whiplash.

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Review #6, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap On the Hogwarts Express

20th July 2015:
Hello! Your story was recommended to me on the forums. It looks like Iím way behind the times because youíre already up to this sixth year. No matter, I have a few hours left on my day off and a review goal that I would like to make a dent in. Letís see what youíve got here dear Gryffin_Duck.

ďSo, how'd you get all those scars?Ē

Do I sniff a werewolf in the mix? HmÖis that a hint?

A friend of my parents' was very clumsy, kind of a problem since she was an Auror. But she was killed in the battle at Hogwarts.

You know what I like so far? That youíre keeping the characters true to their age because when youíre younger you can say things like this rather bluntly and to you it isnít a big deal.

But Uncle Fred died in the Battle at Hogwarts, so after that my dad helped Uncle George with it

I kind of feel like thereís a lot of overexplaining, because wouldnít they know this already if they know about the battle? But then again whenever I read a sequel to a book thereís always that recap of explanations but I almost always skim through those sections.

Short beginning but arenít most introductions? Iíll be honest I stay away from first year stories but thinking about it I donít see too many people writing about first years anyway. I want to see where this goes because you obviously have a story here if youíre into his sixth year now. I canít wait to see what that is.

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Review #7, by Dawn Renaud  Occlumency and Potions

11th June 2015:
This is pretty good. Don't know if you knew that George actually married Angelina Johnson and they had twins. Percy married a girl named Audrey, but I forget her last name. JK revealed this in fan facts. Not everyone knows. Can't wait to keep reading!!

Author's Response: Yes, I do know that. Although she never said George and Angelina's kids were twins. People often assume, since George was a twin, but it's not canon. JKR didn't release the Weasley-Potter family tree until long after I started this series. I did not want to go back and edit two long novels. I'm glad you like the story. Thanks for reading and reviewing! :)

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Review #8, by Alex Home Again

3rd January 2015:
Hi there nice story you have here. Maybe you can answer me a two questions I have.
1. How did Washburn found out about the Hallows?
2. Where Harry's nightmares after the war the first attempts of reading his mind?

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Review #9, by Yvonne Surprise Visitor

19th October 2014:
Can have more chapters pls

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Review #10, by Jacqueline Secrets Emerge

25th September 2014:
Ooh... Exciting! Nice job!

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Review #11, by Jacqueline Planning and Quests

24th September 2014:
Wow... So exciting!!! Really nice story!

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Review #12, by Jacqueline Occlumency and Potions

24th September 2014:
Great story! Keep it up!

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Review #13, by Jacqueline A Big Surprise

24th September 2014:
Matt's a werewolf, right? Seems like it.

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Review #14, by Marc Home Again

7th August 2014:
What an amazing story! I was engrossed in it after like 1-2 chapters and I am so excited that it is already written up to the 6th year. It felt like something that Rowling would write. I cannot wait to start next book and see what adventures happen next.

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it so much! I hope you enjoy the next five as much. Thanks for reading and reviewing! :)

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Review #15, by Freda_and_Georgina Parties and Pranks

9th July 2014:
For the House Cup 2014 Review
*Educational Decree #6 *
Ah, yes, the infamous SLughorn Christmas parties. I wonder what quidditch players will be there. Also, I just realized: how does SLughorn sneak all those outsiders into the castle? I guess he has connections alright.
Hehee, Oh John. "You're kidding me!...Go introduce me!" And of course John would bring his own quaffle!
Love the Exploding Eclair; but I think I've told you that elsewhere before ;)
I like the idea of Harry visiting the graves on Christmas Eve. Seveth year it was a bit of an accident but still...
Rrgh, why doesn't Matt ever trust his friends?
That prank was James-admiration-worthy indeed. :)
GO HUFFLEPUFF!!
--Freda

Author's Response: I love writing the Slughorn Christmas parties. They're so hilarious. I'm sure Slughorn has to get permission from the headmaster for all his special guests.

I've used the Exploding Eclairs in other fics, I think, but this was the fic it first made an appearance, as this was my first fic.

I like the idea of Harry visiting the graves on Christmas Eve, too. I think it's fitting. Thanks for reading and reviewing! :)


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Review #16, by Sean Potter Christmas

29th April 2014:
mine as well get started on the presents!Ē ( Typo) LOL.

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Review #17, by Sean Potter.. ( for Privecy sake I Prefer not to give my  Dueling and Detention

29th April 2014:
I enjoyed it very Much. I get the distinct feeling that Albus is going to be a very Powerful wizard. You are a talented writer sir, God Bless you and your work.

That Washburn bugs me I think it is he that is doing Legilimency On the Potter,s and I want him squashed like a bug I don,t get the impression that Albus could cause that kind of
trouble. James yes Albus NO. Thank you

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Review #18, by Karou_Marauder Christmas Eve

18th February 2014:
This reminds me of something Ron and Harry were doing in around sixth year, fighting with fake wands.

Poor Lily. She must be feeling really sad - waiting for days and then having them throw snowballs and laugh at her...

"his kids were always behaved" To me this should be 'his kids were always well-behaved' or 'his kids always behaved well'.

This is such a sweet scene, and one I haven't seen before. You've written the visit really well, and described Harry's emotions exactly like I'd expect them to be - and the lilies were a great touch.

-Karou

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Review #19, by Karou_Marauder Caught

18th February 2014:
Maybe it's just me, but it feels like 'try-outs' is repeated too much in the first paragraph. I can't really think of any other words you could use except 'trials', but maybe you could word the paragraph differently.

The Slug Club! I had a feeling Albus wouldn't like this. I was right.

What? Matt's ill again? How strange... :P

Slug Club again! "My father high up at the Ministry" should be "My father is" or "My father's".

-Karou

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Review #20, by Karou_Marauder A Big Surprise

18th February 2014:
*grins at "pass out in the potatoes"*

I think the headmaster/mistress usually makes the Quidditch announcement at the Start-of-Term feast.

I forgot you gave us the biggest clue so early on. Ah, the joys of re-reading.

-Karou

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Review #21, by Karou_Marauder The Sorting

18th February 2014:
"cause of death was Avada Kedarva" It's Avada KedAVRA.

Hhmm, I wonder who the murderer is... I can't actually remember!

Yay, Harry is teaching. Harry is a great teacher, in my opinion. Although it would be good to have some OC teachers (but I know you have them later, so it's all good.)

-Karou

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Review #22, by Karou_Marauder On the Hogwarts Express

18th February 2014:
Hiya!

I'm re-reading this so I know why Matt has all those scars, but you say enough about them to create interest and little enough to create mystery, which is a great talent.

"she said Slytherin with a note of disgust in her voice." I know P. Patil (is it Parvati or Padma?) didn't like Slytherin as a student, and would have increased her dislike when many of them didn't fight against Voldemort, but it seems to me that a) Slytherin students can't all be bad, which leads to b) the house can't be all bad, and c) the teachers would be trying to encourage these views, rather like staying impartial at Quidditch matches. Just my two pence.

-Karou

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Review #23, by Kauel of Rock On the Hogwarts Express

4th February 2014:
Hi Gryffin_Duck you are a really good writer! I first heard of you through another author, so, yeah. And I really like the way you described the castle.
How long did it take you to write this book? I mean, Wow! 33 chapters? My highscore is extremely far off. I think you are an epic author - that is high praise, believe me. Well, from me it is. But maybe if I read the next chapter, you'll be EPICEPIC. And that's really high praise! Thanks a lot for writing this for us other readers. If you read one of my books, I'm sure you'd think it was bad! If you do actually want to read one, I would be really happy! They're called Weirdness in Hogwarts and Lily Potter and the Snowmen.
Thanks,
Kauel of Rock.
PS, please reply!

Author's Response: Hi! Aw, thank you! It only took me about six months to write this one, since I didn't have much going on in the way of school work at the time. They take me a bit longer now. I'm sure your writing isn't as bad as you think it is. Everyone always thinks their own writing isn't great. I hope you enjoy the next chapter! Thanks for reading and reviewing! :)

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Review #24, by Arianna Mischief Managed

30th January 2014:
Really good! I liked the part about the Marauders Map.

Author's Response: I'm glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for reading and reviewing! :)

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Review #25, by Arianna Birthday Stories and Suspicious Jobs

30th January 2014:
Awesome!Scorpius Malfoy sounds JUST like his dad. Keep on being awesome!

Author's Response: Yep, he's pretty similar. Thanks for reading and reviewing! :)

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