Wow. This story may be old and this review may be a little overdue but wow. This was just, amazing. It was beautifully written and really quite touching. I suppose the fact that I was listening to quite a sad song whilst reading the end of it didn't help and I found tears brimming in my eyes. Keep up the good work because you are really quite good.Author's Response: Haha thank you! It's nice to go back and see how far I've come from this. :) Report Review
Was this your first piece on HPFF?! Your writing has changed so much! I'm not saying this was bad because I had tears in my eyes towards the end. I'm just saying that your writing style is different now from this.
I really didn't get that she was going to die in the end. I knew something was going to happen but to have Draco kill her? I actually gasped out loud and then wiped a few tears away.
I found this to be really funny though:
Our tongues danced a fiery salsa.
^ Couldn't stop laughing. I'm horrible. I'm sorry but it was really funny to me and now I want some salsa and it's cinco de mayo! I want to eat some salsa and dance a salsa. :DAuthor's Response: This was my first one-shot, but I had a novel before this one that I completed and have since deleted.
I really hate this piece haha. It's awful, at least in my mind, but I'm keeping it up for the memories, and the fact that it has oodles of reviews ;) I'm looking forward to when it gets pushed onto page 2 when I have that many stories.
Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed it despite its age. It's nice for you to see where I started out.
Thanks so much! Report Review
This was beautifully written!! Rose/Scorpius are one of my favourite pairings and I think this captured the ups and downs of their relationship perfectly. The storyline was captivating and smooth, I really enjoyed reading this!Author's Response: thank you so much :) Report Review
This actually made me cry it was so believable! I love how detailed and the way you have set it out with flashbacks it is absolutely brilliant! ROSE CAN'T DIE D:Author's Response: Thanks so much :) Report Review
:O OMG! T.T So wasn't expecting that ending! So sad!
It was a wonderful story though. Very well written. I really enjoyed it :)Author's Response: thank you so much :D Report Review
This story was tragically beautiful! I could tell there was an edge to this story, one of regret...of sadness, but I wasn't really sure where it was coming from until the end, which just added to the beauty. And before I go on to more likes, I'm going to point out a couple things I noticed that you may want to look at.
"He was resentful that he had been saved by the very people he had sworn to hate. I suppose that's one thing we have in common. Father thinks pure-bloods are as good as royalty, the best of the best." ~I'm a bit confused here. I don't know what exactly Scorpius is suggesting he has in common with his father...
"So you must be wondering how Rose humiliated me. I had stolen something of hers before a transfiguration lesson, when her back was turned." ~You may want the word 'well' at the start of the second sentence. Just so it's easier to tell he's starting to tell the story.
But other than those few things, I absolutely loved this story! My first complement has to be that this is written from Scorpius' point of view! I can honestly say I have not found a Rose/Scorpius stories from his point of view, but I loved it. You seem to have a really good understanding of Scorpius as a character, and it makes this story easy to read.
Also, the way you have this story written, I didn't realize Rose was going to die until that short passage before the last flashback, about the time turner. And even then, I didn't want to believe she'd die by Draco's hand. Even though I knew. But honestly, it was beautiful! The description, the characterization, and the plot...wonderful! Great Job! Report Review
Aw...so bittersweet...Wonderfully crafted, though. Great job!Author's Response: thank you! Report Review
This is really good; I like it. It reminds me of how I felt when Snape died.Author's Response: thank you! Report Review
I cried. Stupid Draco malfoy people can be soo cruel sometimes. Well I loved this story I read it like three thousand timesAuthor's Response: Aw thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it so much :) Report Review
Ohmygosh. This was beautiful, and heartwrenching. Someone reccomended me read this and I'm glad I did now!
i love how you've tied things together - eg. the roses, thats a beautiful touch at the end.
I also like how you've made me hate Draco again, I think too many people portray him as suddenly "a new man" after the war.
xxAuthor's Response: oh wow, someone recommended it? that makes me smile so much, it's such an old fic. glad to see someone still loves it haha. I think this piece has a special place in my heart because it's the first one-shot I wrote, no matter how much I cringe at it now :P thank you SO much for reviewing, this was such a lovely surprise! Report Review
*sniff* so sad.
but so nicely written. good job.Author's Response: thanks so much! Report Review
Oh my god, that was fantastic. Your use of flashbacks to give the readers a sense of the whole story was phenomenal. I loved how you tied in the yellow roses after her birthday to the last paragraph. Scorpius was characterized so well, you made me go from hating him for his prejudices to loving him for turning his back on his to wanting to cry for the pain and guilt he is feeling. So well written, I loved it!Author's Response: thank you so much! I really appreciate it :D Report Review
Thats so sad.
=( Stupid Draco.Author's Response: thanks so much for reviewing! Report Review
I just L O V E D this story. It's got to be the best short-story Ive ever read. Rose really changed his life by showing him true love. Draco is seriously the bad guy. I mean: it's Scorp's life. Anyway, this was an AWSOME story. 10/10Author's Response: thanks very much :) Report Review
I knew draco would kill her... ugh and the last sentence of every sad story always makes me cry. and yours was no acception... exeption.? oh well.
I loved itAuthor's Response: exception :P thanks so much! Report Review
That has to be one of the most beautiful one shots I have ever read. It was just...lovely. As soon as Draco showed up, my heart started beating really fast because I knew what was coming but I did not want it to happen. But it did. Wow. Amazing job. Author's Response: thanks so much! Report Review
Wow. That was kinda sad. I really liked it though.Author's Response: thank you so much! Report Review
amazing... really incredible. I loved it! :O)Author's Response: thank you so much :D Report Review
absolutely beautifulAuthor's Response: thank you :) Report Review
Oh, that was lovely, so unexpected too. I loved the aspect that Draco just as vile as during school. And that Scorpius was as well to begin with. But that ending, took me by such a surprise. Wasn't expecting that at all, I almost gasped.
But wonderful job, this was vary original and I really enjoyed it.Author's Response: thank you so much! I like to try my hand at originality :) Report Review
Wow. I really liked this. It's absolutely amazing. You're writing style flows with a poetry few can perfect. I'm a big Dramione shipper and now I hate Draco. Ugh. How could he?
Wow. I swear, that's all my mind is telling me to type. That's all that really comes to mind. It's really written beautifully. I like how you told the story; starting from the beginning, the occasional flashback, and then the last part in the graveyard. So sad. You made the reader really feel everything Scorpius felt.
You did an amazing job. Really. Few can write as well as you can. This was absolutely wonderful.
10/10, no doubt.
-Mrs Roonil WaslibAuthor's Response: *blushes* thank you ever so much! Actually, the fact that you're a bit lost for words is flattering... I honestly can't thank you enough. This was the first one-shot I did, and now I find it hard to get back into the rhythm of writing them.
thank you :) Report Review
Oh gosh...that was...wonderful. There was so much emotion. The feel you give the reader is just amazing. I loved the whole thing, it was all in tact. The character you give Scorpius is excellent, like you can really see him in the story. I like the plot line, and how you keep your flow and situations together. Great job! 10/10
--ron.weasleyxo from the forums :DAuthor's Response: thank you so much! i loved writing Scorpius, so I'm glad you liked him too :) thanks so much for the review!!! :D Report Review
Oh, I suspected the end since he asked her to marry him.:)
This a pretty good story, especially the end, but I'm just too biased on Draco Malfoy to see him a younger version of Lucius. This looked more like a Dramione to me, than a Rose/Scorpius. But a good story nonetheless.
I believe it was a little bit hard to present their whole story in a one-shot, but you managed that pretty well.
All in one, a very sad, but beautiful story. I would have liked you to give us more details about Rose, though.Author's Response: A lot of people have a strong opinion on Malfoy... unfortunately I'm not his biggest fan so I was biased as well. I wrote this before I had fully understood his character, so if I was to write it again I maybe would have been a bit softer on him!
I'll work on Rose, I just didnt want it to be too long. I've been considering splitting it up for a while.
Thank you so much for the feedback :D Report Review
A very unlikely pairing, written marvellously.
Liked your style of mixing past and present.
Two thumbs up.
P.S. It's "tranquil" but "tranquillity".Author's Response: thank you - i actually dont think it's so unlikely, after writing it. Before i did, I too thought it was unlikely. But i find that i can only believe in a ship after writing it. You should give it a go :)
thanks for the review - i'll go check up on that error. :) Report Review
*blows nose into hankerchief* That was so sad and wonderful, 10/10!
-RAuthor's Response: don't cry!! thanks for the review :) Report Review
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