Reading Reviews for Twelve Steps from You
14 Reviews Found

Review #1, by ANightingaleInAGoldenCage On the Train

23rd April 2017:
Hiya! Here for CTF!

Interesting start you've got going here. I'm not sure if I fully dig the entire chick thing, but hey, if it works, it works. It can be used as a bit of a slang so I can see why you did it, at least!
I am curious as to who Selina is and what she said to make the Marauders so hostile to Adria though. It can be a multitude of things, but it must be bad if it garners such a strong reaction from them, especially James and Sirius. I hope it's explained soon, really! At least from their POV at least, as I don;t think it'll make full sense if it's being said in front of Lily yet.
I am also wondering when James is gonna grow up a bit and be more mature, as we all know this is The Year They Got Together. There must be happening something and very soon at that to make Lily's opinion of James change drastically. I wonder how you're going to go at that.
I do like how Adria and Lily are close enough for the former to have an immediate and full on hatred for the latters sister. Not that we can blame her, because we all know how Petunia is. But that is some sheer loyalty there, I must say. I wonder if the Hat ever debated putting her in Hufflepuff...
Regardless, interesting chapter to begin with and I love to know how you take this further!

Author's Response: Hey :)

Adria is based on my bestie so she and Lily have a very similar relationship to ours (even calling each other 'chick' when we were at uni together!) and would naturally have that reaction to Petunia (who wouldn't, really??) Interesting thought about her maybe being Hufflepuff.
I have some thoughts as to where it's going, just not the time to formulate and write properly lol
Thank you so much for the review xxx

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Review #2, by AbraxanUnicorn On the Train

23rd April 2017:
Hello! I'm here for CTF #1. We 'Claws are keen to get our hands on a flag. Is it lurking amongst your stories?

Hurrah, a marauder era story!! And already there seem to be tensions between the OC, Adria O'Donnell, and James Potter. Doesn't help that Adria barges her trolley into James, I suppose, but they haven't even got to school yet! You would think they could hold back their bickering until term actually started? I mean, they are all 17 going on 18 and almost adults..

Heh! The animosity between James and Lily, typical of what we know from canon, and I think it's well-portrayed here. I take it Adria and Lily are good friends? It's just as well if they have to share a dormitory, I guess.

Appalling relations between Lily and her older sister, Petunia! That's not particularly nice language, Lily, and sending your sister dragon dung is a little bit over-the-top, don't you think?! Wow. I knew things weren't great between them, but didn't suspect they were this bad.

Gosh. Lots of hostility in the first chapter. I'm grateful for the voice of reason that comes in the form of Remus, who is clearly trying to exercise some control over all these war-like situations on the Hogwarts Express. I'm really glad there's someone who isn't hated and despised by everyone else!

Hmm. Interesting nod towards Adria's vulnerability. I wonder what Lily could mean by that?

Great opening chapter!

Brax X

Author's Response: Hey, Thanks for reviewing!
Adria is based on my best friend (for an old challenge) so she's written from that perspective (so yes, she and Lily are very good friends lol) So they would have a 'your enemy is mine' type thing and would not like Petunia's attitude at all!
And Remus is always the voice of reason!! lol

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Review #3, by Leent On the Train

24th May 2008:
Oooo, a cliffie...I don't think I like this Selina.

However, I really do like this story! 'Pickled in a jar...' I was dying with that, oh, the mental imagery you have inflicted, ha!

I am liking Adira, especially during her hostile banter with Sirius - 'then I'll kick your arse next Thursday!' - priceless! I like that she stands up to a point, but is sensitive to the confrontation and not just full of that explosive anger I often read. Well done! And now I have another fave story :))

Author's Response: Aw thanks. I love that people like Adria cos she's based on my best friend (the pickle jar comment is actually hers!!!!). I'm a bit stuck on chap 2 of this fic and want to get Thatl posted, but I'll update asap.

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Review #4, by sasuke4naruto On the Train

9th May 2008:
omg. Poor adria!. What happend? when, how? where? why?. I can totally imagine Sirius doing that. usually i dont support Sirius's gfs in other stories but in this one i actually feel whats shes feeling if you get what i mean..
Love it 100/10 :D

Author's Response: Ahhh- that may come up in chap 2 which is WIP. I'm glad you empathise with her as she is based on one of my best friends. Thanks for reviewing.

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Review #5, by siobhan_malfoy On the Train

28th March 2008:
I really want to know what Adria is supposed to have done now lol, update soon!
I love your banner by the way, can you tell me how to get into contact with Alora? because I really need a banner for my story

Author's Response: Thanks. I put in a request in The Dark Arts

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Review #6, by crazy chick On the Train

27th March 2008:
i like it good job
update soon. plz
pretty please with
a cherry on top or
whatever you like

Author's Response: Its being written but poss when the queue opens as you asked so nicely :-) Thanks xx

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Review #7, by MoonlightDeceptions On the Train

19th March 2008:
very good cant wait for more do update soon :)

Author's Response: Thanks- chapter 2 is being written...

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Review #8, by skateskate9 On the Train

19th March 2008:
Excellent so far. Keep up the good work. I hope Sirius and Adria can patch it up. Although, I think they probably will. Update soon, please.

Author's Response: Thank you- writing chapter 2 at the mo...

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Review #9, by CJ_Black On the Train

17th March 2008:
*feels happily distracted from work rubbish* Hi there! Let me just say, this was a fabulous start, and it’s absolutely convinced me that I want to keep reading this story. It was light, humorous and refreshing, and I enjoyed every bit of it. The humor especially was extremely well placed and very tasteful (I’m really not the person who enjoys all kinds of humor). I’ve rarely come across stories that have made me laugh, but this was definitely one of them. Adria is a very funny and interesting character, not like most annoying OCs (and yes, I have a thing against OCs – too many MS probably), and I liked reading about her. I already have some suspicions about the misunderstanding between her and Sirius, but I’m looking forward to reading the juicy details. I know there will be plenty of them. Adria/Sirius was very well written, as was James/Lily. And…*offers cookie* - that’s for not making James call Lily “Lily Flower”. Cause that’s just…wrong. *gag* I have spotted the Heads’ Dorm Cliche, but oddly enough, I didn’t mind it. There’s plenty of lovely qualities in this story to make up for that. I would recommend paying a little attention on the spelling – you’ve skipped a few letters here and there – and the spacing. I loved the way you wrote the characters – Peter was awesome, I laughed my -***- off every time he said/did something. I just love clumsy Peter. Sirius was also well written, I can picture him doing/saying everything he did/said. James was great, Remus was also very good. Lily was a tad OOC, but since I hate canon Lily, I enjoyed Lily in this story. Much more pleasant than the actual Lily. I also liked the relationships you developed between the characters. Sirius/Adria is very interesting, seeing as there aren’t many stories that start with a break-up. Most of them are just “girl falls for boy, boy falls for girl, they live happily ever after”. The friendships are well portrayed, nothing forced down the reader’s throat or anything. There isn’t much I can criticize overall, except for the spacing, which is a little pet peeve of mine. The dialogue was excellent, I’ve rarely seen dialogue flowing so naturally in a story. The sarcasm was great, not too much but not too little, most of it was very original, and all of it was funny and entertaining. I’m really looking forward to more of this story, and I WILL be back to read the following chapters. This story is just too enjoyable not to read. Besides, I want to know who Selina is and what happened between Adria and Sirius. All in all, this story was funny and interesting, and a lovely distraction from the evil work. I’ll give you a 9/10, and congrats for the awesome, awesome humor. Hugs! CJ

Author's Response: Thanks so much- I'm so glad you liked Adria cos she's based on my best friend from uni (yes she is that sarcastic and random- much of her dialogue was a direct quote, all done with her permission though!). I wrote Lily like that because she fits in with Adria more, and I also don't particularly like 'Lily-flower' unless James is using it to deliberately annoy her.
With the spacing, I find it easier to write like that I'm afraid and my computer seems to space it more when pasting. I've gone back and changed a couple of s.p.g mistakes I've noticed so hopefully that should validate soon.
I'm not sure when it'll update cos I'm focusing on another story at the mo, but once I know more where this is going I'll post. :-) Thanks for what is officially my longest (and one of my nicest reivews). Oh and thanks for the cookie. Yumxxx

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Review #10, by Midnight Ink On the Train

17th March 2008:
New story to distract me from my law work =) yay!
I wondered what she is supposed to have done, that I am sure she never actually did- you've got me on the girls' side already! Great start.

Author's Response: He he this is all part of the plan...though James and Sirius might not be entirely yo blame...
Glad to have been of assistance lol

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Review #11, by carlysue22 On the Train

15th March 2008:
I love it! Sirius is I'm a little confused though. Why don't they like each other...I guess I'll just have to wait. I love the line, "The atmosphere in the compartment could be cut with a knife." In that one line I got a perfect picture of how it looked in there. Really excellent

Author's Response: I love Sirius!!! He he. You'll just have to wait and see, there might well be some history.... Thanks for reviewingx

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Review #12, by marinahill On the Train

15th March 2008:
oh the tension! great first chapter *sigh* i will be checking back for me, of course. and who's Selina? crikey, a lot to think about there :)

Author's Response: Aha... you will just have to wait and see who Selina is... Thanks, I'm glad you like it.

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Review #13, by Natascha Rey-Barry On the Train

14th March 2008:
Great beginning there would love to see more on this storyline and the relationship. She's a fiesty one

Author's Response: I'm on it don't worry!!! Hmmm...I wonder where I can get some ideas from....

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Review #14, by Andromeda Black On the Train

11th March 2008:
Oh, I love this story? I wonder what it was that Selina said...but I don't like her already! Another fab chapter by my favourite author in my favourite era!!

Author's Response: *blushes* Thank you so much again. I have an inkling it wasn't very nice....

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