461 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Olivia Abercrombie Full Circle

15th March 2013:
Oh, this is B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L! I'm sooo glad there is a sequel!

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Review #2, by Olivia Abercrombie Happy Christmas

14th March 2013:
Oh, it really IS a Happy Christmas if Hermione gets to spend it with her parents! I'm surprised Ron asked Viktor to help them, though, he used to be jealous of him. *wink*

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Review #3, by Olivia Abercrombie A New Day

13th March 2013:
Lockhart + Fudge = Trouble = LAWTON
This story = AMAZING

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Review #4, by Olivia Abercrombie Time to Say Goodbye

13th March 2013:
SUCH a sweet chapter! I mean, it was awesome except for the part Corner knocked her down. Even a troll would notice how much Harry loves Ginny. And a exceptionally dim one too.

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Review #5, by AsphodelMoon93 Full Circle

15th June 2012:
Hi!

I finally finished this story and I'll totally regret it if I didn't at least have a final opinion of what I thought of this story as a whole, so be prepared because this might be a long review... I'm not sure.


So, I really and tremendously enjoyed your fiction. And to think I finished this in two days, hehe.


You really stuck to canon which not everyone could do. Even I, as being a fanfic author, cannot achieve that. So I give you a lot of props.


You really know how to bring emotions out of me. It wasn't too dramatic but it wasn't too... I don't know, but you really didn't overdo anything. You provided a good mixture of action, suspense, romance and so forth.


I read a few comments that was left and this chapter and one specific person who pointed out your weaknesses, and saw that you said it was an old fic so I won't bother you about that.


In addition, I loved how you brought a whole different perspective of Post DH instead of being similar to others. I thank you for that, you gave me something new and refreshing to read, because I've been looking a good fanfic for months, and I'm not exaggerating. You don't know how many times I came onto my computer to search for a good one but my search was practically fruitless until I came across this one, which I'm glad I did.


All in all, I'm writing a fanfic of my own which I'm not finished yet but do know that you inspired me to keep going and write a post Deathly Hallows of my own which will be out soonv- but I'm not trying to propose my stuff onto my review... Anways, love it, and I'm glad you have a completed sequel to this which I'm going to read after this.


Keep up the good work and when I'm done with that one, I hope to see more works from you

-Asphodel

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Review #6, by AsphodelMoon93 Descent into Darkness

14th June 2012:
Wow, awesome well descriptive chapter.

Way different from others.

Can't wait to read more

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Review #7, by tinashe beni Full Circle

22nd December 2011:
wow!!u definately did justice.cnt wait to read the sequel.this rivals jkr s work but i real enjoyed ths thank you for continuing the harry potter legacy.

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Review #8, by rebeccanna Time to Say Goodbye

30th November 2011:
You had me with my eyes watering... very emotional chapter, and written exceptionally.

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Review #9, by Riverwind Full Circle

6th November 2011:
Thank you for a wonderful story, I look forward to reading other stories that you write.

River

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Review #10, by potterfan226 Full Circle

6th October 2011:
I just wanted to say, once again, that you are an amazing writer! I loved this story, and I loved how it was canon. It is so hard to find GOOD post-DH stories that stay true to the story. So I applaud you for that! :)

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Review #11, by potterfan226 Under the Oak Tree

6th October 2011:
Oh Rita Skeeter.

It was too good to be true!

Good chapter once again.

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Review #12, by potterfan226 Summer Days

6th October 2011:
Again, great writing! I am intriqued, Rita Skeeter ... helping out ... this should be interesting! :)

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Review #13, by potterfan226 Descent into Darkness

5th October 2011:
Great first chapter! You are a great writer and although the first chapter doesn't give away much, can't wait to see what the rest of the story has to offer!

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Review #14, by EmilyPotter2390 Full Circle

18th July 2011:
I loved this story. You are a great writer and I loved this version of what happened next. I am off to read another story by you.

Em

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Review #15, by R.R Descent into Darkness

15th May 2011:
The battle of hogwarts was May 8th 1997, not 98 by the way. I like the chapter all in all.

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Review #16, by Precious Rin Coming of Age

6th April 2011:
I'm already hooked on your story--your very beginning paragraphs were excellent. However, the pace of the story seems really fast. I think it might be the abundance of dialogue. A little more description would be lovely and help slow it down a bit. But I do love your characterization of Harry. I think you've hit him spot on the nose. I can't wait to read the rest of it!

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Review #17, by MichaelTurpin Things Change

7th November 2010:
Wait, that was the great, big, secret plan? First try to kill Ginny, then reconsider, planning to call out Harry - and when he comes, just stand around stupidly and having himself tied up?

Not only that, but even though he is apparently the mastermind behind this cruel scheme, he refers to his colleagues and attempts to die heroically? Isn't that out of character for any kind of deatheater, who followed Voldemort in his attempt on immortality?

Not to get me wrong - i really liked your story up to this point - but this kind of conclusion is just too cliché.

Author's Response: This story was written years ago. My style has changed a great deal since then.

Thanks for reading.


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Review #18, by MichaelTurpin Gryffindor vs. Slytherin

7th November 2010:
I think Ginny and Gwenog met at the Christmas Party in sixth year already, but that could be my mistake.

Author's Response: That's entirely possible, but I'm not sure what impression Ginny would have made on Gwenog at that point.

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Review #19, by MichaelTurpin The Seeker Returns

7th November 2010:
Good thing i didn't pay attention to the title of the chapter, or the surprise would have spoiled. I'm still waiting for that Gryffindor guy from the Sorting Ceremony to pop up again, the way you described him made it look like he was important XD

Author's Response: Um - I honestly can't remember if the "random Gryffindor" reappears in the story or not. Sorry.

N.E.P.


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Review #20, by MichaelTurpin Fireside Chats

6th November 2010:
That "firecracker for George and Fr..." part doesn't work that well... it's "Fred and George", and has never been the other way round. If you'd forget about Fred's death, you'd still name him first. Like the chapter, though.

Author's Response: Sorry I didn't word it correctly for you.

N.E.P.


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Review #21, by phoenix217 Full Circle

29th September 2010:
Hi NEP! I just finished reading your story, and I wanted to say -- job well done! It's a pretty good story, and you had a great rhythm (and, indeed, a style similar to JKR) that made this story believable enough to carry a plot that had some weaknesses. Overall, I did enjoy the story, and I just figured I'd offer my criticisms in case you ever continue to write more fanfiction (I see you have a work in progress) or even continue this story.

The major weakness I found in this story was the conflict that arose in the plot and the main antagonist. It was an okay idea and it was enough drama to carry you through the things you really wanted to do -- i.e. show how things get resolved post-war, bring the couples together, find hermione's parents, memorial, teddy, getting jobs, marriage, all of those loose ends that needed tying. But I felt that there were some general problems and some specific problems with the plot.

First, more broadly, the idea that death eaters are our out to destroy harry is far from original. Placing someone working at Hogwarts or in the ministry trying to destroy Harry is far from original. And using people he loves against him is also unoriginal. But even more than that, overall, there was a lack of believability or seriousness to me in terms of this big "problem" of Ginny being killed or Hermione being arrested. It seemed to me that as soon as they suspected Lawton, why didn't they interrogate him? Or atleast get Ginny out of there? Veritaserum, anyone? Or even before they had suspicions about him, as soon as Ginny had the fall and almost DIED, once they discovered someone had been out to get her (imperius, etc), why on earth would they let her just return to school ho hum without a full thorough investigation? That just seemed illogical to me.

More specifically, Kingsley was in a poor excuse for minister of magic and former head auror (and just general awesome dude) if he couldn't figure out that Greengrass was at least a little bit suspicious -- especially if he was a death eater??? Was this kept from snape or something? How on earth would they not know who all of the death eaters were? It's unbelievable that he'd just be allowed to work at the ministry, especially in such a sensitive position. Not only that, why in goodness name does it take Kingsley months to give Harry a simple list of employees? And why doesn't harry just go to HR or the secretary or something and get a list himself? It was like they weren't really taking it seriously or that he was just acting as if solving this case was a lot harder than it seemed. There weren't enough complications, it was extremely simple. Oh -- and at the end when Harry rescues Ginny, Kingsley was upset that Harry didn't call first? That was totally out of character and just seemed ridiculous. You don't call the minister of magic before you go rescue your girlfriend. And everything was fine anyway plus Ginny had been hurt so why would Kingsley bother being mad?

Plus, I didn't think Greengrass/Lawton was a very good villain in the first place. He was completely blah in the beginning, and then he was totally useless and uncreative at the end. It took him THAT long to capture Ginny? And then once he did he couldn't even properly kill her? And all he had was a silly speech about how Harry was a pathetic failure, no talk about the dark lord, mudbloods, etc. and that just made me question his motivation -- why does he hate harry so much if he, well, doesn't really seem like he does? He could have killed harry a million times throughout the year and if he were really so into the task as he was willing to do it poorly enough to get caught after all those months then why wouldn't he have just offed Harry first chance he got and disappeared for a while -- or even gone to azkaban, wouldn't it have been worth it? I just didn't really get a sense of who or why or what he was or why he even wanted Harry "destroyed."

Anyway, I think there was room for development in terms of the plot and how the characters behaved all the way through, with respect to the main problem at hand. However, I did like the characters and I thought they were all thoroughly believable which is hard to do and rare to find in fanfiction. There was one major exception in my mind which is Ron. Yes, it is possible that within a few months someone can undergo a major transformation, but is it likely? There were a few moments with Ron mostly dealing with Hermione that he just seemed silly -- like overly cheesy or suddenly suave and romantic and ...i dont know. It just wasn't Ron! Part of the appeal of the couple is that he's sort of quiet, bumbling, not good at expressing his feelings but she loves him anyway because she's a pretty no nonsense person herself and she's happier being the louder one of the group. The most adorable Hr/R moments are when you can see how subtle but strong their affection is, like when Harry notices their hands nearly touching when he went to sleep or when they get jealous and don't really say anything they just get sulky or even just how protective they are of each other. I didn't really see the point of either couple getting engaged this early on...there wasn't much of a buildup so it wasn't so heartfelt as it could have been, but especially hermione and ron, I think they would have been better off having a slower evolution of their relationship and just overall more subtlety (and cluelessness) for Ron's character.

Overall, good job! I hope my comments are helpful in some way. And good luck on your next stories.

Author's Response: Hi Phoenix!

Wow, you really spent some time on this review. This is my oldest story. I know it has some strengths and weaknesses. I've long since given up editing it, though.

Glad you enjoyed it - or at least I think you did. A few of your comments made me wonder just a bit.

-N.E.P.


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Review #22, by Catherine Coming of Age

26th August 2010:
... Still loving it!

Author's Response: I'm glad you're enjoying it. Thanks for letting me know.

-N.E.P.


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Review #23, by Catherine Descent into Darkness

26th August 2010:
I thoroughly enjoyed this chapter and i'm very eager to pursue the next one! Well done, it's wonderfully written and very intriguing.

Author's Response: I'm so pleased you enjoyed it!

-N.E.P.


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Review #24, by baletgir Descent into Darkness

13th July 2010:
Wait, is this a dream? No way could this piece exist. Have I finally found one? Yes, I think it is. A completed, Post-Hogwarts, what could have happened in the 19(ish) years, well-written novel? When I first joined HPFF, this is all I wanted to read. It was all I searched for. I found a lot that I started, but they were either abandoned by the author or by me. I gave up and broadened my horizons. And low and behold, I stumble across this! I am so thrilled you don't even know.

Now that I (hopefully) finished rambling...
This seems like a really great start to something with at least potential (hence my previous ramblings) and probably much much more. I cannot wait to see where you are going to take this in the following chapters, and I think it is time for me to go and find out!
:)BaletGir

Author's Response: So glad you seem pleased to find this story. I've had a couple of rocky reviews in recent weeks in regard to this one. Know that my writing gets better (or so I'm told) as you progress through my stories. The third novel in the trilogy is progressing slowly, but isn't abandoned.

I hope you enjoy your time spent with this one!

Thanks so much for your lovely words. I might even be inspired to write a chapter for Secrets Revealed before the closure.
-N.E.P.


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Review #25, by One of a kind The Truth

5th July 2010:
While I think you story is slightly interesting. The last few chapters leave much to be desired. Harry afraid of his girlfriend? Please. He has duties to the magical government and he is afraid of his girlfriend, again please. He signed up for them. As far as I can tell based on how you write you are a girl.

I have no idea what country you live in nor your age, nor do I wish to know. But a male or female put their duty and their business above others, and if other people do not like. They would say, "Leave, there is the door."

Sadly you, like so many other show harry strong in the face of hate/danger and other such things, but can not stand-up against a girl with his beliefs. I wonder, is this the type of male you want for a boyfriend or husband? One that bows and begs at your feet, while he is out chasing the bad guys due his job? Or more likely, you are wish to have a more thoughtful boyfriend or husband.

Thought-not! So why show this in your story? Keep your personal life - personal and your writing life your writing life. You can use your experiences to create some characters in your story. But you main character as to be exactly that, your main character without any of your own personal problems or desires. Why do you think they have what is called a "mary sue" it took years before JKR admitted Hermione was a 'mary sure'.

Now I am not being cruel or rude. I am not trying to put you down or tell you - you are stupid. Far from it all, I wish to see you improve. Just as I wish to improve. But hey, if you don't wish to listen or you wish to flag my email as being flame, your choice.

I am just pointing out one of many flaws in your story, listen or not, means little to me.

Author's Response: Sorry you didn't like this chapter. I think you might want to skip reading the rest of my stories. I wrote this one ages ago, and I'm not planning to edit it.

I do think it is odd that you're wondering if I should tag this as a flame. You obviously understand how you're coming across in your reviews. Good job of self-evaluation.

-N.E.P.


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