Okay I just gotta say good chappie but James and Lily were both Gryffindor and they were heads. Report Review
yeah this is really cool please finish it make some sort of pot hogwarts job its really good. Report Review
Wow. That was so close. Death Eaters and Hogwarts, but why they stopped there?Author's Response: i dont actually know just did lol kinda went that way, thanx 4 the review
Great! Riley came up with a great idea. ^-^, although i bit disappoint that you didn't write the answers. ^-^, just my naughty thingsAuthor's Response: OK LOL thankyou Report Review
brilliant, i love the whole story!hope all the difficult stuff wasn't too bad. plz write more soon.Author's Response: Thankyou very much.. i will try to post more soon
I Love this story,I love everything about story,the kids, the setting, I just love it.Repost soon.
You deserve better then a 10/10,but that's all I can give you sorry. :)Author's Response: Im glad you liked it, i try to bring my life into the story by thier feelings towards things. and 10/10 is FANTASTIC! Report Review
I was wondering how long Hermione would go before her parents came into the picture. Nicely done, the story is progressing well.Author's Response: Thankyou, you seem to be enjoying the story so i hope that it stays that way thankyou for all your reviews Report Review
Very nice cliff hanger, again. Dumbledore should fear an irate Hermione defending her kids more than Voldemort.Author's Response: Yea lol thanx Report Review
nice save on the kiss question by Hermione. a nice story moving along. a bit surprising that Harry didn't react stronger to seeing something outside the window, thoughAuthor's Response: It's building and also Harry thinks his safe at hogwarts Report Review
This story seems to be getting off to an interesting start. I haven't read one that had Harry and Hermione as babysitters before (unless it is one of their kids they're watching). It was a little short, though, so I'm not really sure where you're heading.
I do have one note of (I hope) constructive criticism for you. You have quite a few spelling/grammar/incorrect capitalization and punctuation errors scattered throughout.
"Well isn’t it obvious Hermione you’ll get Head Girl you’re the smarts witch of your age and you are loved by all the teachers” He said rolling his eyes
Smarts = I think you mean smartest. Also, "he" shouldn't be capitalized in this sentence, and you don't have any punctuation at the end.
I'm not wanting to be overly critical, but paying more attention to the details will make your story easier for the reader to enjoy.
Keep it up!Author's Response: Thanx for the review iam trying to improve Report Review
This is very cute. keep writing. Report Review
This whole story line is great. I can't wait for the next chapter. The only complaint i have is with the spelling. Thare are several rather anoying errors, but overall the story is very readable. unlike quite a lot of fan fiction that is nearly unreadable. with some refinement this would be a novel worthy of rowlings herself.Author's Response: Thankyou very much for this review, im trying to improve my writting skills and its an honner for sum 1 too say that Report Review
Hope your ok hun, and wow what a chapter.Oh no, Riley saw them *giggles* That was awesome. post more soon pleaseAuthor's Response: Thanx 4 ur concern, things r getting better. Im very happy u enjoyed this chapter, i got the idea for riley idea from someone who that happened too. i'll try to get more soon Report Review
wow! awesome. i would love to see how this turns outAuthor's Response: Thankyou, for ur wonderful review Report Review
oh this is so good please keep up the great workAuthor's Response: Thankyou very much :D you have made my day Report Review
First of all.. I’m really sorry for not reviewing the 2nd chapter because I’m really curious about your story.. I do really think you might some points with the other story I told you before. In the other, those kids have great powers so the Heads acted as their parents but their real parents were still alive.. In your story, those kids heve something special too and I can’t guess what those special thing because I’m not good detective ^_^.. but their parents were dead.. That are things I concluded.. I hope I’m not wrong. And for chapter I read. I do really think you wrote too fast. I mean like you just conclude everything in three days. Well, I’m really surprised about Dumbledore acted as Grandpa. That idea was really great. I think you can detail in some areas, like Dumbledore, which I said before; not conclude all in just three days. Maybe, other is when Tonks came for lesson about family. You can describe the conversation. Just take your time. Don’t be so fast.
In the end, you gave me something to think. I thought the man/woman who was watching Riley was Malfoy. But, I don’t think so too. That was really easy. And don’t give me that. Just my demand. ^_^. Hope you don’t mind. Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you that in other story, some people did want the kids..
Lastly.. keep on writing ^_^..Author's Response: ok, Thats alkright 4 not reviewing. Ummm ok you have confused me abit and i will try 2 writing more than 10 pages in word. thankyou 4 the review i think LOL Report Review
i was really worried when tara was hurt, i cried, i actually cried, my daughter looked at me strange. lolThis is brilliant, really touches my heart, you have captured the spirit of love.Author's Response: Ive gotten the exact same look from my boyfriend lol im really glad u are enjoying this story and thanx i really wanted 2 put that sprit into the story wasnt sure completely if it was there but hearing u say it has made me sure. thankyou Report Review
oh so ugly lucious has found them. he needs his long hair to tangle up in a printing press with the words 'murderer' and 'i like to kiss moldy bottom's' stamped across his head.grAuthor's Response: Yes he does, i totally agree Report Review
Wow.Great.I just thought harry'll ask hermione after dumbledore's explanation.You delayed it.That's fine.Then next will involve Voldermort too or wedding.Author's Response: you'll just have 2 wait and see my good friend lol Report Review
Wow.That's great.Although,i still feel too fast.Or.Maybe because this's short story.First.I'm sorry for not reviewing 3 chapters before.Im glad that you had read the other story&dont mad at me.Well.Back to your story.The kissing's part,not really best describe,i mean,you can add the feeling first before that happen.I thought the black person is draco Malfoy.But,it turns out to be lucius.Just get close.Then about dumbledore,i'm angry like hermione and sad that you put him as bad,but i'm wrong,and really glad that he's still good man..I hope harry wont deny the adoption..I mean from the upcoming,i guess that comes from hermioneeAuthor's Response: Well thanx 4 the review, im glad u sorta understand where it comes from Report Review
I love your story please do continue Report Review
I want to be honest.. at first time I saw your title I was really curious about what was your story like because I read other story, which has same title with your story. After I read yours, I got conclusion yours has same points with the story that I told you before, like the title (I had already told you), Hermione was a Headgirl, the Headgirl and Headboy must took care of two kids, a boy and a baby girl. I think their age nearly same too with that story. The difference is the Headboy in your story was Harry, the other was Draco Malfoy. I don’t know, maybe you just came up with the same idea in your mind without knew there are similarity with other. If you have time check this story out: Baby of Mine by hermystwin. If you read this, you’ll know what I mean. Really, no offense about your story, just curious.
Beside about what I had talked to you earlier, I think you wrote too fast. You can slow down by detailing the scene, like more conversations. ^_^. Don’t angry with me, okay.Author's Response: i have actully read that story awhile back, i read it again and realised it has the same sort of plot but i did come up with this myself, i had the idea from being in hospital a little boy called me mummy all the time cause he didnt have one .. so i put it into my head and worked on it by putting it into my life and trying to think how i would react. i do try and add more detialing each time but in some sences i find it hard. Im not angry thanx 4 the comment Report Review
I love it. It was very sweet. I truly am enjoying your story. keep up the good work.Author's Response: Thanx im really glad people are enjoying it Report Review
is get in even more beutifull this history is great please continue .Author's Response: Thankyou Report Review
While I have nothing against the subject matter itself, it wouldn't hurt to do a little cleanup of spelling and grammar.
8/10, I'm afraid.Author's Response: thanks 4 ur comment and i will try Report Review
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