It was an okay story until Lily dyed her hair. I just can't read it anymore. Report Review
OH-MY-GODRIC! AMAZING! Report Review
Ur story is great I have been reading it for a while, sorry I haven't made any reviews yet... Keep weighting stories they r so good! Report Review
James was a chaser, the plaque was for his chaser abilities.the MOVIE got it wrong...read them again Report Review
Haha I love that Lily gets the bed and James gets the floor!Author's Response: Aw, thanks you. Report Review
I'm sorry, but... this was terrible. Sirius and Remus would have been yelling at James, not avoiding him.Author's Response: Thanks for such a lovely, kind review. This was my first storyâ¦. Report Review
Hot Stuff? Seriously? 1, it's just plain corny, and 2 she uses it eeevery sentence. Use it once as a joke every other chapter, then find a different pet name for James.Author's Response: â¦ Thanks! Report Review
Meh... Guys can't go up to the Girl's Dorm, Whenever they try the stairs melt and become a slide. Read Harry Potter #5 if you don't believe me.Author's Response: I read ALL the Harry Potter books more than once. I made it different in my own story. Report Review
You need sentence variety, the sentences are all of the same kind of structure and gets boring and slightly painful to read.Author's Response: okay, thanks. Report Review
1, Firewhiskey is an adult beverage that you cannot have unless you are 17 or older. And 2, okay so his name is Max, not Mark... but still, what the hell? If she doesn't like James, why in the bloody hell did she kiss him? And if the answer to that is that she really DOES like him, then why is she going out with MAX and not JAMES? There's no reason why Lily shouldn't go out with him, so unless she's afraid of her feelings, then this makes no sense.Author's Response: I'm sorry that you don't like this story. It is up to you whether or not to review. And I would think, that if you choose to review then you would give some more helpful criticism. Instead of just plan old being criticism. This doesn't help anyone. Report Review
Ok... so she's kissing James, and yet she doesn't like him? And now she's going out with Max?Author's Response: â¦ Thanks for reviewing. Report Review
The letter is too blunt. It says 'I hate you for the fact for you ever being a witch,' or something to that effect. Petunia wouldn't write that; she knows that Lily already knows. Reread it and pleeeaaase make it better.
Also, you told us what the letter said and then had Megan read it. I think that it would be better to have her run out crying, us clueless until Megan reads it.
But then again, that's just my opinion.Author's Response: One of the things that annoys me about your reviews, is the fact that you aren't telling me any of these things nicely. You're being too much of a critic. And if you learned how to rephrase them better, then maybeâ¦ just maybe, I will take them seriously. Report Review
Butterbeer isn't strong stuff; actually it has barely any alcohol in it. Probably the same kind of situation with soda, as all soda has unbelievably minute amounts of alcohol that comes from the distilling process. No way to avoid it. You'd have to drink around 200 liters to get tipsy. There may be slightly more in butterbeer than in soda, but the blunt of it is, you won't get drunk by drinking four or five of them. 'Tis clearly stated in Harry Potter #4, when Winky (a house elf not mentioned in the movies, which really pissed me off) gets drunk after drinking 20 butterbeers and Dobby has to explain to Harry that although it has little effect on humans, it has a great effect on house elves.Author's Response: â¦ Thanks for being so knowledgeable! I know who I will go to next time, when I feel as if I need to be put in my place! Report Review
The first time that Snape calls Lily a mudblood was in fifth year, right after their Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L. (the written portion of it).
If you haven't read Harry Potter #5, then you wouldn't know; it was in Snape's memory, but they cut it out, the idiotic muggles.Author's Response: I actually have read the fifth Harry Potter, thanks so much for making an assumption that I haven't. I have taken my own liberal creative way in this story, so I can change it if I want. Thanks though. Report Review
James calls Emily 'Kiddo' way too much, it gets repetitive and annoying...Author's Response: Thanks. I don't really think this is enough information to improve off of. But, thanks for your opinion. Report Review
Lily's nickname for Petunia as kids was 'Tuney,' not 'Pet'Author's Response: I can switch it up if I want too, can't I? Report Review
That is an amazing story!!! So intense at times but also really really sweet!! I loved it!! Are there more stories about James and Lily after graduation??? If not you should continue. You are an amazing writer. I'm planning on continuing my only story if I could ever finish it. So just wanted to say please please please write a sequel! Thanks soo much!!!Author's Response: Aw, thanks so much. This is my first fan fiction I have ever written. It's pretty rough actually. Report Review
This story is so amazing and i just wanted to say well done :) you did a great job with the storyline/plot xAuthor's Response: Haha, this story is so old. I'm glad you enjoyed it nevertheless. IN my own opinion it is one of the worst thing I've ever written, I encourage you to check out my newest stories if you ever get the chance. I'd love hearing your opinion on them! Thanks for reviewing. Report Review
Do i get my cookie now or is it mailed to me later? LOL. Just Kidding ! love the story so far!Author's Response: COOKIE NOW. HERE
THANKS FOR REVIEWING Report Review
A very good story. Well done. Keep up the good work.Author's Response: thank youuu!! :) Report Review
I LOVE THIS STORY! IT IS AWESOME! KEEP WRITING YOU ARE AN AWESOME WRITER!Author's Response: well thank you :) Report Review
GRR...LILY YOU NEED TO WAKE UP AND SEE YOU LIKE HIM! DARN IT! COME ON! sry i had to get that out. i will do that alot at the beginning of a review say what i think about the chapter in caps. sry. i love this story and Lily and James stories are my fav. I just love them.Author's Response: hahah. Thanks so much! :) Report Review
wtf, Hot stuff?
jeez this is having a serious affect on my upchuck reflexes! I've stuck with this so far despite the gramatical errors but now, just argh. too much!!Author's Response: haha. this was written so long ago. It's realy bad and everything. so thanks for reading for a while. Report Review
I. Loved. It.
But I think they said I love you WAY too much
Great job. Bravo. Fantastico. I tip my imaginRy hat to you
Annie (",)Author's Response: woahhh. haha. that's my FIRST ever fan fiction and story i completed. I can't believe you liked it. ahoy. thanks for reviewing and battling with all the grammatical errors! Report Review
I just finished reading your story this morning and wanted to thank you for finishing it! I found it last week when I looked about a new story about the marauders and the history before Harry Potter. I 've seen that you sometimes wanted to abandon your writing, and I'm really glad that you haven't done it yet. I'm not so often connected to the Internet so I can't check permanently for new releases otherwise I would have written this review sooner.
The only thing that interrupted my reading flow have been a couple of repeaten words and some grammar mistakes.
I hope you wil continue writing!
FabianAuthor's Response: thanks Fabian! that makes me happy you enjoyed it.
that's my first ever fan fiction i did so i know it's a bit choppy. other than that i hope its okay. your review means so much. thanks Report Review
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