Reading Reviews for A Moment Under the Mistletoe
28 Reviews Found

Review #1, by The Wizard of Potterland A Moment Under the Mistletoe

4th July 2011:
This was a lovely little story that I'm very glad I read. Thanks for writing it!

Author's Response: Thank you very much!

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Review #2, by snowlilly A Moment Under the Mistletoe

17th February 2010:
Now, I have a very serious[pun intended] request: I want a video form of this. Now. Even though I can't make videos myself, I do in my head, and this is so perfectly paced, and it doesn't have the thrilling racing OMG I JUST KISSED SIRIUS moment, making it even better. And so I conclude my request. [:P]

Author's Response: Well, that's one of the best requests I've had ... ! I can't see why it needs a video though, if you can already see it in your mind's eye ...

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Review #3, by JennyMc A Moment Under the Mistletoe

15th December 2009:
Ah, this was . . . perfect for me to read.
The holidays . . . Sirius . . . it's wonderful.

Author's Response: Haha thank you! Hope you have a happy Christmas!


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Review #4, by Laughing_My_Tail_Of A Moment Under the Mistletoe

29th September 2009:
CUTE !!! love it really !!

Author's Response: It would surprise you how much receiving this review amused me. Thanks!


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Review #5, by WotcherLizzieGinny A Moment Under the Mistletoe

6th April 2009:
That was really good. You have got sophisticated writing. Keep writing more!

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm trying to write something new, but I think it could be a while before it's posted, especially because I have exams coming up and stuff. Thanks for the review!


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Review #6, by iscreamdraco A Moment Under the Mistletoe

10th March 2009:
hehe sweet story XD


Author's Response: Thanks!


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Review #7, by MissBrutal_x A Moment Under the Mistletoe

4th March 2009:
That is awesome. 8/10. I'm like obessed with the Marauders.

Author's Response: Thanks! I love the Marauders, they're awesome. Thanks for the review!


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Review #8, by numba1marauderluva A Moment Under the Mistletoe

2nd March 2009:
This was so sweet! I love how she's pretty ordinary - you know, not drop dead gorgeous or well-known or the fifth Marauder... I could go on. Ha. ;D Anyway, this was really well-written and I enjoyed it. :] 10/10.

Author's Response: Aww, thanks! Yeah, I tried to make her original, and I just felt that the other stereotypes of Sirius' girlfriends were a bit unrealistic. Thanks for the review!


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Review #9, by _Martha_ A Moment Under the Mistletoe

28th February 2009:
Well, the main character certainly has a brilliant name ;D
Anyways...Aww that was so cute!!!
I really enjoyed reading it! =D

Author's Response: Haha, I like the name Martha :) Thank you very much!


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Review #10, by Pretty Purple Pelican A Moment Under the Mistletoe

11th February 2009:
Very cute. I like that she turned him down at first, but I think she was a little too adamant about how plain she was. One thing that you really have a remarkable talent for is simple conversation, and I'm so envious of you for that. It's so difficult to have characters engage in a casual conversation without making the reader lose interest or have it seemed forced and unnatural. You, however, have done a marvelous job with it, and I think that's one of the reasons that I enjoyed this story so much. I think there is just so much beauty in the simplicity of this story. Nice job! :)

Author's Response: Thank you! I might have another look at her plainness then. I suppose it was easier because the characters were based on people I know quite well, so it was relatively easy to construct the dialogue. Thanks for the review!


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Review #11, by babbitty_rabbitty A Moment Under the Mistletoe

2nd February 2009:
That's what i'm looking for! A short story that does not lack details! I really don't get how to do it. When i add details, it becomes too long. If i keep it short, it seems colorless.
Yours is so elegant, I think!

Author's Response: Haha, thanks! I'd say just practicing at the whole bikini thing - long enough to cover everything, short enough to still be interesting. It comes with time. Thank you very much for the review!


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Review #12, by Lea Bishup A Moment Under the Mistletoe

25th January 2009:
Wonderful story, but I agree with some of the other people that it ended fast. I kinda didn't understand the ending. But I thought it was really good writing. She should totally go out with Sirius if there's ever a sequal. A well done one-shot!

Author's Response: Thanks! Yeah, I've heard a lot about the ending, but I think I like it the way it is. Thanks for the comments about my writing. I don't think there will be a sequel, but she probably would if there were. Thanks for the review!


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Review #13, by bitten by a snake A Moment Under the Mistletoe

22nd December 2008:
I love it. It's kinda of how I imagined Sirius being all smoooth like. Haha.

Author's Response: Thanks! Haha, I see what you mean! Thanks for the review!

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Review #14, by little_red_riding_hood A Moment Under the Mistletoe

20th December 2008:
hey that was a really great story!
i really liked it, do write more stuff!

Author's Response: Thanks! I'm planning on writing more soon, I'm just settling on what. Thanks for the review!

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Review #15, by Dolphins_R_beautiful A Moment Under the Mistletoe

3rd December 2008:
Aww, so sweet! I love the characterization. Sirius was so stalking her! That's why Sirius would even think about being in the library. Good one-shot!


Author's Response: Thank you! I think the characterisation was good because it was vaguely based on people I know. And yeah, it's very probably true that there were few reasons that would get Sirius within ten inches of a library. Thanks for the review!


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Review #16, by Shane A Moment Under the Mistletoe

26th October 2008:
Hi stoirmeacha,

Nicely done and quite engaging... but the ending was kinda.. I dunno... rushed? And also like, incomplete? However, if you're planning a sequel then it makes sense to leave the story at that point, but if you're not... it's a bit awkward. Anyway, good job and 8/10 from me!

Love, Shane

Author's Response: Hi Shane,

Well, I'm not planning a sequel. For me, I guess it had some sort of sense of fulfillment because Martha got what she really wanted. She regrets what she's done at first, and then it's almost like he corrects it for her. I can see where you're coming from, but in a way, I like the ending open like it is. I can see what you mean about rushed, but I've revised that ending again and again, and I think I personally quite like the effect it has.

(I also think I need to stop being so pedantic ...)

Thank you muchly for your review.

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Review #17, by momoe A Moment Under the Mistletoe

26th October 2008:
You teased with the bit of probable-lip-action beneath the mistletoe and then have them lock lips in the common room? Very fiction-ish.

I liked it. Very much. I don't read a lot of one-shots, but this is one of the better ones I've read. I like how you don't give too much detail, but rather just the right amount of detail, because then it can be finished and over with.

And your story is over. And it was great!


Author's Response: Yes, very fictional, I'm afraid. I was basing the character of Sirius off someone I knew, and trying to work with how I thought he'd react, and he isn't one to easily stand being rejected by girls (ie. he thinks he's attractive to the whole female race).

Thank you very much. I don't read that many one-shots either, I find they can be a bit OTT and cliche. Thanks for your comment on the detail, I think it's something I have trouble with sometimes, so it's good to know where it was good.

Thank you!

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Review #18, by CheleCooke A Moment Under the Mistletoe

18th October 2008:
Hi there.
This is a very nice idea, and I'm glad that it was all about a simple kiss and not about a big relationship. It makes the moment sweet and innocent, and very lovable.

I will admit that the incorrect grammer around dialogue was rather off putting. I would suggest getting a Beta to look over it for you so that you can get all the correct grammer in there and make this sweet story even better.

The only other thing I will comment negatively on is the lack of Martha sharing her feelings abour Sirius. In the summary it gives the impression that she's got a huge crush on Sirius, but it's hardly mentioned in the narrative.

As I said, this is a nice, sweet piece, and with the grammer fixed, could be even better as readers can focus fully on the story.


Author's Response: Thank you very much for your review. I see what you mean about the grammar: I think I've learnt a lot more about it since I wrote it, so I'll go back through and edit it: thanks for pointing it out.

I guess the Martha's feelings issue is something that came across differently to me as an author than to a reader, but I'll take another look at that: thanks.

I'll just go and have a look at those things: thanks for your review.


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Review #19, by Leo072491 A Moment Under the Mistletoe

9th October 2008:
I love the ending it was really sweet, and surprising. Martha sounds like a really good character and I love how you describe her in this one shot. I would love to see Martha in other stories. The only thing I wish this story had mentioned was how Sirius and Martha came to know each other. Really besides that I think you did a wonderful job and I hope to see other stories from you :)


Author's Response: Thank you! No-one's ever mentioned wanting to know how they got to know each other before, so thanks for that feedback. Thanks for the review.


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Review #20, by granpa harry A Moment Under the Mistletoe

11th June 2008:
Sorry, I can't really give a great review. I see the story beginning but but without something more, I just don't know.

I'll look at something else you write

Author's Response: Fair enough. Martha may make an appearance in my new fic, which you probably won't like anyway. Thank you for taking the time.

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Review #21, by blimey A Moment Under the Mistletoe

10th June 2008:
Aw... so sweet! I love this moment. I think a lot of people can identify with it *coughMEcough* I loved your portrayal of Sirius. Kudos!

Author's Response: Thank you! My characterisation of Sirius was based mainly on one of my best friends. I think I can identify with it. Thanks.

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Review #22, by Leent A Moment Under the Mistletoe

4th June 2008:
That was lovely! I loved how you used the first person here, and usually I don't like that much. Her inner musings were excellent, and flowed nicely with the story.

Author's Response: Thank you! Sirius was heavily based off one of my best friends, and I suppose I just put into words what I feel with him. Okay, maybe best friends wasn't the phrase - it's complicated. I'm writing something else in first at the moment, so it's really nice to hear that. Thank you very much!

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Review #23, by Novadestin A Moment Under the Mistletoe

21st May 2008:
That was magnificent! Reading something in present tense always makes me feel like I am a fly on the wall watching a scene play out in front of me. And you did it wonderfully! I absolutely loved the ending when she leaves him there and then he tracks her down, so perfectly worded.

Ok enough gushing hehe there were four spots where I think the present tense got switched with past: "I looked up to see Sirius Black", "I grinned.", "I admitted." "I bit my lip". "look", "grin", "admit", "bite" would be present tense but maybe there supposed to be like that hehe either way it was a lovely story! You get a perfect 10! :D

Author's Response: Thank you!!! Thanks for pointing out my mistakes, I'll go through and rectify them. Thank you so much. xx

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Review #24, by emily A Moment Under the Mistletoe

1st February 2008:
ep! i love it! so cute!

Author's Response: Thanks :)

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Review #25, by mischiefmaker A Moment Under the Mistletoe

3rd January 2008:
ouuww. :> i too loved it ! do you have a long story about Sirius and Martha? I think it would be fun to read, judging by this story anyway. This one surely brightened up my day, i've been looking for a good Sirius/OC fic for a long time, but without finding it. I've read too many of them i guess. This one was nice, even if it was TO SHORT !

Author's Response: No, I don't. Martha was originally going to be a character from something I'm writing at the moment (not S/OC really, sorry), but I wasn't entirely sure if it was against ToS, so I made it a different pairing. Thanks :)

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