Reading Reviews for Once Again...
  
25 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Phoenix_Flames How It All Began

19th January 2009:
Hm.

You have an excellent plot and your writing is very good. You have great characterization. I particularly like how you portrayed Scorpius.

This is very good, but your grammar and spelling got in the way of reading it. With all the mistakes, it is difficult to take in the wonderful story. Your paragraphs are arranged in a slightly odd way and there were quite a few mistakes. I would suggest getting a beta. It is their job to help minimize these things and that makes the story much more enjoyable. Perhaps think about how you order yoru paragraphs, for it made the flow a little rocky, but it was still brilliant nonetheless.

This was very good and I can't wait to see what else is in store for this wonderful story!!

8/10

Author's Response: hey there! thanks for the review!
ok, i've been pondering getting a beta and then putting the first few chapters through again because you're right about the grammar, but i haven't discussed this with Lex, which i will most definitely do, because this is a joint account. Both opinions matter here. :)
and I'm glad you enjoyed it still! Chapter five should be coming your way sometime in the near future!

xoxo, Lolo


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Review #2, by Labby Marauders for Short

31st January 2008:
Interesting chapter. I really liked the beginning with all of the description. I can definitely see more improvement in this chapter and a lot less grammar/spelling mistakes than in the first one. Great job with that! I love how you have a history of Rose and her with another boy and that she's thinking about Scorpius . That's cute. The main thing about this chapter was the confusion that it didn't happen right after the last one. It might be good to explain that it's a couple years later. Great job!

Author's Response: There is definitely more to come with Scorpius and Rose. Yeah this is the first chapter we put through Microsoft Word so it was a lot better. We did mention in the last chapter that nothing of interest happened until their third year so we did tell you just not in this chapter. Thank you for reviewing all of our chapters it is definitely fun to read your reviews!!
xoxo~Lex


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Review #3, by Labby More Pressure and Relief

31st January 2008:
Ah.. interesting chapter. I love how Scorpius was still sorted in Slytherin - that kind of makes it more real. I hope that the others still try to make friends with him so that the houses merge a little bit better and the prejudices aren't so bad.

Again, the grammar and spelling in this one wasn't great, but it wasn't as bad as the last one. The main criticism I have about this chapter is that not that much happened, but you were able to set up the scene a bit for more. Great job so far!

Author's Response: We definitely have a plan for Scorpius so keep your eye on him and he is mentioned in the 4th chapter and he's in the fifth so keep your eyes peeled. Sorry this chapter was written awhile ago and we just really wanted to get all the details in and get passed it because the plot happens in the third year.
xoxo~Lex


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Review #4, by Labby How It All Began

31st January 2008:
Alright, that was an okay beginning. The plot seems pretty good so far and I really like the way that you've characterized Scorpius. There's not much known about him, so you can be pretty creative. I like how he's a little different from his father and that he's searching for some more friends.

The grammar and spelling in this seemed pretty bad. I would definitely suggest to look at the find a beta section of the forums and see if you can find a beta to look at this story. It just was pretty distracting with all of the mistakes. I'm off to read the next one!

Author's Response: Thanks I was planning this story for awhile so I already really know everything about the characters but to tell you the truth I have no idea where this story is going to end up. Thanks we are now putting our chapters through Microsoft Word before we post them so hat should fix the grammar and spelling stuff.
xoxo~Lex


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Review #5, by ~*~ali~*~ Marauders for Short

30th January 2008:
soo i was just cleaning up my e-mail inbox, and i saw the e-mail where lex sent me the link to your story...

i read the second and third chapters and i just have to say that you guys are getting really good! ^_^

(I really like the scorpius thing... i expected it to be someone else, but then you said blonde hair and i was like "WHAT?!" lol)

it was a little confusing going from the second to the third chapter i'm not going to lie lol.. you skipped a lot without much explanation but hey... it was okay lol

good job guys!



Author's Response: hey there! thanks for reviewing, its good to hear from you again!!

we're very pleased that you like it :)

yeah, the dream thing was a little different, but that's what we were going for. lol.

sry that it was a tad confusing... it was a little hard to make the transition from 2-3 with the whole age thing and all, but we hope to explain most things in later chapters.

thanks for the honesty :)

keep reading!

~~lolo~~


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Review #6, by rosai_gryffindor Marauders for Short

20th January 2008:
excellent chapter, girls!! i loved it! very fun and refreshing to read, and your characters, especially Rose, were really well written! i loved the charm idea, especially when hermione made the star one! and i cant believe that rose is kidding herself that that dream meant nothing... ah well!
anyways, great chapter! update soon!!!
Rose :)

Author's Response: aw thanks so much rose!!

and im glad you liked how Rose was portrayed, it means a lot to me, because she's one of the best characters to write! well, in my opinion, her and katie. Lex favours Star and Lily (can't say i blame her, they're great characters too)!

we'll update as soon as possible! we promise that it won't take as long as last time!

~~Lolo~~


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Review #7, by jenrabbit Marauders for Short

20th January 2008:
YAY!!! you guys are posting again! It was wonderful (of course), and I totaly give it a 10/10. update really, Really , REALLY soon, PLEAZ!! I liked the idea with the pendants, that was really sweet. I also like how they are now OFICIALLY the Marauderettes, that was clever.
kisses
~*jenni*~

Author's Response: hey hey! im so glad that you liked it!! i wrote this chapter myself, and the next one too (lex wrote the next two, 5 & 6), so it means a lot! of course we'll update really soon! lex is gonna type up chapter 4 really soon, and then we'll post it. it should be up sooner than this one, because we had some troubles with rejection and what not, but its all good now!

glad you like the pendants idea, it was one of lex and my better ideas :D

and im also glad you like the officialness of the marauderettes. that was my personal touch. hehe. :)

keep reading!!

~~Lolo~~


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Review #8, by xlilyx Marauders for Short

19th January 2008:
yey update :) haha great chapter but i want to read the other half! the marauderettes lol

update again soon :)

im the first to review yey me :)

Author's Response: yeah you are the first reviewer YAY you!!! anyway sorry for the long delay it got rejected TWICE and now i have to type up the fourth but it's already written so i should be coming soon. glad you liked it.
xoxo~Lex


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Review #9, by Princess Di More Pressure and Relief

11th January 2008:
Hmmm... I saw that, but I had re-read it a second time to fully comprehend it.

Author's Response: lol, i assume you comprehend it now? good! keep reading! It's gonna get so much better from here!
we sent the third chapter in for validation a while ago, but it got rejected, so it'll take a bit longer. Sorry, but it should be up soon!

~~Lolo


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Review #10, by Princess Di How It All Began

11th January 2008:
Ooh lala, Professer McGongall has arrived!

Author's Response: o yes, she has arrived! :)

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Review #11, by chocolatefrog123 More Pressure and Relief

11th January 2008:
nice job! :) this is really good so far.

Author's Response: Thanks a ton!!! We are updating really soon.
xoxo~Lex


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Review #12, by chocolatefrog123 How It All Began

11th January 2008:
that's really good!! i'm really liking this. its sounds great! rose is really well-written! nice job!

Author's Response: Thanks so far it's been both Lolo and I writing Rose, but now Rose is just hers so if you ever see Rose after thes two chapters it's all Lolo's doing well whatever is in her persepctive.
xoxo~Lex


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Review #13, by ginnyweasley_potter More Pressure and Relief

11th January 2008:
i know. so awesome. the hermione thing, and the Rons nearly headless nick. so awesome. i tend 2 make random hp references in my stories 2 .

Author's Response: Glad you liked it and glad you noticed those. Keep reading!!
xoxo~Lex


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Review #14, by xlilyx More Pressure and Relief

11th January 2008:
hey,

i like this it is cool- me, being the harry potter geek i am, noticed all the repeted lines and stuff from the books/movies :P good job i am enjoying this and hope you dont take too long to update again :)

10/10

xlilyx

Author's Response: Thanks a ton!! We sent in our chapter, but it got rejected so we'll resend it and then it should be up. Keep reading and we will try and put more repeats.
xoxo~Lex


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Review #15, by rosai_gryffindor More Pressure and Relief

5th January 2008:
great chapter too! if a little rushed... still, i enjoyed reading it! and would certainly like to read more when you update!
Rose :)

Author's Response: thanks again! ya, it was a little rushed, but the next chapters are pretty good if i do say so myself! so keep reading!
~~Lolo


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Review #16, by rosai_gryffindor How It All Began

5th January 2008:
great story, gryffindorgals! i am likeing the albus/rose stories now, they seem fun and refreshing after the era's i usually read! i like your characterisation, and the look of the plot so far. (few mistakes in spelling, but nothing too major) so yeah, great job! im off to read the next chappy now...
Rose :)

Author's Response: well thanks bunches! hope u enjoy the next chapter
~~Lolo


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Review #17, by ginny321 More Pressure and Relief

25th December 2007:
Um, I'm assuming you've read the books, as there is DH canon in here, but Dumbledore kind of died in HPB.
Otherwise, pretty good!
I'll be checking for updates.
8/10.

Author's Response: omg! i never even noticed that she wrote dumbledore in there! thanks for telling us! well, lex wrote this chpt, so the blame falls on her, lol, but seriously, it was a total mistake!

we'll try to update it so that we change it to the rightful new headmaster (we did actually come up with one)! but for now, pretend that it doesn't say "Dumbledore"! thanks for rating and reviewing!

and without your comment we probably never would have realized our typo :P xoxo~lolo


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Review #18, by immature_atmosphere How It All Began

23rd December 2007:
oh. i love it! well done! so um. will they all be in the same house? like a min marauders thing. that would be cool. and who is lilys brother?

Author's Response: you'll have to read the next chapter to see who is in what house. It says what house everyone is in. Lily's brother is a new character. Lolo has the book right now so she has the list of all our characters so I don't know his name, but I can tell you that he is James Potter's (the second) friend. Thanks for reviewing and you should definitely read the next chapter. Also if you know anyone who could make us a banner that would be greatly appreciated.
xoxo~Lex


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Review #19, by ginny_weasley_54 More Pressure and Relief

21st December 2007:
amazing story. can't wait for the next chapter.

Author's Response: thanks! we'll update as soon as the queue lines get back to normal! and don't worry! we'll be writing tons over the holidays! maybe even some new stuff so keep yer eyes open!
xoxo~lolo


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Review #20, by jenrabbit More Pressure and Relief

13th December 2007:
Hey guys, luvin it so far!! I saw what you left my copycatter, and am eternally greatful btw. So update soon, i know you two have seprate fics, but still can't you make a little time for this one? (pouty lip and puppy dog eyes). 10/10 all the way!!!
kisses
~*Jenni*~

Author's Response: thanks so much Jenni for remaining faithful to Once Again, and i sincerely promise that we will ABSOLUTELY make time for this story! i love it too much to stop writing it! it was a tad difficult to figure out how chpt. 2 was going to fit in our schedules but fear not, we have come up with a brilliant can't fail plan that will undoubtedly get new chapters in faster, but still have enough time to work on our other stories! and it was my pleasure to support u with the copycatter deal! what was going on in her mind when she copied i can't even fathom!
so in conclusion, thanks for reviewin, and plz update soon on Dragoness!
xoxo~lolo


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Review #21, by Lolo_Lex_gryffindorgals More Pressure and Relief

12th December 2007:
So sorry if there was confusion I responded to the wrong review. OOPS! Lolo is probably ticked at me because it's her story and I answered one of her reviews. Sorry guys I wanted to respond to the review below the one I responded to.
xoxo~Lex

Author's Response: ya sry for the confusion! lol! jeez lex! takin all my reviews how dare you? its ok i forgive you, grrrr!

so ya, w/e, I CAN'T respond to it now! just next time READ WHAT STORY THEY REVIEWED FOR!
xoxo-lolo


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Review #22, by Sirius_Padfoot_lvr How It All Began

12th December 2007:
here's a hint:
maybe if u guys posted more chapters, then u would get more reviews
just a thought...
please update son!

Author's Response: ok thanks for reviewing! we've been trying to update as soon as humanly possible, but its a little hard with two writers. anyway, we have put up our new chpt in for validation, 4 days ago to be exact, so it should be up soon! we'll most likely be putting up new chapters sooner next time so plz keep ur eyes open and continue to review!
xoxo~lolo


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Review #23, by Alison Kallonen How It All Began

7th December 2007:
crap.. I forgot to rate it... this one has my rating in it lol



Author's Response: thats ok, we can't see the rating anyway! we know you love it though! this is lolo btw! i really appreciated your ideas! and we have already submitted the next chappy! so if the backlog doesn't lie, it should be up sometime tomorrow! buahaha!
much love, lolo


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Review #24, by Alison Kallonen How It All Began

7th December 2007:
Very well done girls! ^_^ I like the way that you guys kinda stuck with the feel of J.K.'s writing style, it made it feel more authentic.

I also liked the way that you incorperated who's kids your characters were, it made them feel that much more recognisable.

A few things you could work on:
-restrict your use of brackets, it almost cuts the reader from the story as you read it. And especially cut them from dialogue in all cases.
-some of your descriptions of what your characters were doing while they spoke were a bit awkward (for example, you mentioned hair quite a bit in one part). If you find it difficult to add detail while they're speaking, try writing the dialogue, then going back later to add some description. It can make it easier.
- in some cases, your writing kind of skips ahead, while in others it draws the details out. Be more consistent since it's one scene. (for example, the conversation in the compartment is well done, but when the Flint girl comes in, that's a bit rushed. Also, near the end when Lily dissappears and then returns, it feels a bit rushed).

I think if you work on those areas a just a few more, your writing skills will be absolutely excellent.

I really really enjoyed reading it girls! Keep up the good work and give me more to read! ^_^



Author's Response: Thanks so much for the advice lolo snd I thank you. We will definitley work on it. It was a little rushed in the end because it 11:30 on a school night and I was just trying to get it in so the story would be up faster. It really means a lot to us that you review because we only have one besides you even though we've had 100 reads! so thanks
xoxo~Lex


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Review #25, by jenrabbit How It All Began

26th November 2007:
I luv it!!! you know usually i don't like next generation fics that much, but this one i'm liken. update soon!!!
kisses
~*jenni*~

Author's Response: hey thanx that means a lot! did ya no ur our first reviewer ever? well u are and that makes ya special! lol so we're workin REALLY hard on the next chpt., so it'll probably up soon... asap anyway!

xoxo--lolo


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