I love all of your Grimm/McGonagall stories, incredible poignant and beautiful. The scenes all came across as very still, almost photographic, while to read it was wonderfully moving absolutely terrific.Author's Response: Thank you! This is so amazing to hear because I love writing these characters, and it means a lot to have people enjoy reading them just as much. ^_^
This story is particularly photographic - I like that way of putting it! - because I imagined the setting more strongly than the characters. The land is a character in itself, really, and Grimm's line that Minerva is inseparable from the landscape is very suiting to this. :D Report Review
Awww that was lovely. Great job! :DAuthor's Response: Even with the ending? It's a very sad story, but that scene in the Scottish hills - if that's what you're referring to - is picturesque and emotional, and I'm glad that you liked it. ^_^ Thank you! Report Review
this made me cry! what a wonderful story. thank you for sharing itAuthor's Response: Thank you for telling me that you liked it! :D Report Review
So sorry to see Grimm gone. As it so often is; you never know what you have until you lose it. Minerva could never admit to herself how much she needed Tibbs until there was no chance that he would ever pronounce his love for her again. You have written this entire series very well. Your writing is nearly the polar opposite from mine, but i really enjoyed all of the passages relating the inner monologues of the principal characters. My own style centers more on the spoken conversation between the characters. Your style is the kind i am trying to put a little more into my own style. I'm really happy to have found your stories. I am sure I will be reading many more of them in the near future. Happy writing.Author's Response: It was hard to write his death, and to make him disappear, but I could not figure out how to bring him into the book's canon. McGonagall in the books could not be distracted by his presence, and death was the only way to separate them permanently, sad as it is. And you're very right that she most misses him when he's gone and never coming back - only then can she admit to herself the true depth of her feelings.
Sometimes I wonder if I include too much internal monologue. Dialogue took a long time for me to write properly, and even now, I avoid it unless it's necessary to move the story along. Maybe it's because I'm not much of a talker myself, but who knows. If you want to switch styles, you're very welcome to mine - I'd love to be more comfortable with writing action and dialogue. ;)
Thank you very much for your reviews! I do hope that you'll come back to read more stories when you have the time and inclination. I've very much appreciated hearing from you. Report Review
how do you do it Susan? the banner for this story is one of my favorites, and this story is so sad but beautifully written. The finishing lines linger on which only adds to the creative talent of your writing well done Susan!!
LoreAuthor's Response: Thanks very much, Lore! It's one of my favourite banners too (can I say that? :P) and it's wonderful that you also enjoyed the story (which is also one of my favourites). Thank you for taking the time to read and review this! ^_^ Report Review
i hoped Tiberius would stay with Minerva but sadly he died. this was a great fic.^_^
Harry and GinnyAuthor's Response: Thank you very much! It is a sad ending for both of them, and it would have been much better if they had stayed together. For some reason, though, I wasn't able to make that happen. :(
But I'm still glad that you enjoyed reading this! ^_^ Report Review
I'm quite saddened by this. I think what's worst is that first he wants her, then he's freaked out, then he wants her again and finally he just gives up on her. I wanted him to have more constancy than that.
Meanwhile Minerva cannot bend the slightest bit. I understand her loss, but I also know from my own experience that he would have grieved with her, even years later, if she could have explained to him what they were grieving for. Knowing that he went on to raise his niece, I have to think it was a twisting of the knife for her.
There were just so many near misses in their happiness.Author's Response: Now that I'm most of the way through writing "This Longing", I'm starting to want Grimm to be more consistent too. :( There's so much potential for a great relationship between the two of them, but it never works out, and that's painful to think about. They could have had a lot together.
Though you're right in saying that both of them were to blame for the end. Grimm may have been a coward, but Minerva was too stubborn to let him know exactly what she felt about it all. She shut herself off, and he could never really know her anymore.
Arg. It's too sad. I wish I could rewrite a bit more happiness into their lives.
Anyway, thank you again for the review. I'm sorry that this one was a much sadder story to get through. Report Review
I loved this story. It felt very heartfelt and I felt really sad. I had not read any of your stories previously except 'The Fires Within' which was very nice. However, your Grimm trilogy is quite breathtaking and addictive. I loved 'ad memoriam' and even 'ghosts of you'. I have currently started reading 'this longing' and eagerly look forward to an update! Please continue your amazing work. :)Author's Response: Wow, thank you! ^_^ It's wonderful that you enjoyed this story and its prequel - they're two of my favourites (well, any of the three Grimm stories are my favs really). The first person narrative in this story here made it easier to get into the sorrow Minerva was experiencing - I don't think it would have been quite so heartfelt from an outside perspective. :) Report Review
Oh God.. I wish I hadn't read this. And I definitely mean that as a compliment.
I'd been delaying reading this as it was 'part 3' and thought I'd wait for 'This Longing' to finish first. But then I had some time to kill and couldn't help myself :S
I've come to love Grimm so much that I may be genuinely traumatised that this is how their story ends :( Poor Minerva. It's beautiful, but just so tragic. I may need a little recovery time before I can read about Grimm again..
And the fact that you got me so emotionally invested - that's the compliment :)Author's Response: I wish it could end happier, the two of them do deserve better. :'( That would, of course, mean that I would have to write a happy ending, which isn't genetically possible. *thinks*
It is a great compliment that you like Grimm and was made sad by this story. It's horrible that you feel so traumatised, but you're right, it means a lot to the author when someone feels such emotion after reading a story. The characters have become real, not just words on a page.
I really thank you for this review. I'm so sorry that the story made you feel so horrible, but I'm glad that you took the time to tell me that it did that. Means I got something right. ^_^ Report Review
This one shot was a beautiful story of Minerva's past that many people don't get to see. I thought you did an excellent job making the tone and flow of the story to match up with its theme of sorrow and regret. I also liked all the little details that you put in about the time period (like the brother lying dead in France). I think the story was sad and it gave the reader a different perspective of the Minerva McGonagall we know and love. I did find it interesting that she once had a child, but that the child was lost, since we never see McGonagall mentioned ever having children or even being married. This gives us some insight as to why she never did. I loved the ending and how you paralleled the two funerals and the two men waiting for her at the gate. I especially loved the words she chose to use for Tiberius in the end.
There were a few parts that got confusing. At this part "I haven't believed since I saw the dead girl in seventh year, and the look on Grimm's face after he'd found her." I am assuming that Minerva is referring to the little girl she miscarried, but I wasn't really sure. I thought maybe something else had happened at Hogwarts and a student had been killed. I think the confusion stemmed from the fact that I didn't really know when this story started in Minerva's life. I was caught off guard when it said that it had been fifteen years since they had lost their daughter. This may be just me who missed something. It is easily remedied with a line or two about what her age is when she is at her father's funeral. For some reason I thought she had just recently graduated from Hogwarts.
I also wanted to know a little bit more about Tiberius and what his past was. How did they meet and what exactly had happened that led him to leave Minerva when she was pregnant? You may have intended to keep him a shadowy character just like he was hidden in the shadows at the gate. If so, then good job. If not, then maybe you could add a snippet of information here or there about his past and his relationship with Minerva.
I also found one tiny mistake and it is here:
"Two years since had returned, finding only emptiness between us." I think you meant to put a "he" in between "since" and "had".
Other than those few critiques, I think this is a stunning portrayal of what Minerva's life could have been like. It was realistic for both Minerva and the time period. I also loved your use of names, as in Janus being the brother of Minerva and how both names were references to the Roman Gods. Nice job with that.
eternalangelAuthor's Response: Oh sorry! I should have responded to this much much sooner. *hides* It's a really helpful review, and I hope I found the right typos when I went through the whole story again, searching for them. :) I love it when people point those out because I can't always find them myself.
Thank you for taking the time to write out such a wonderfully insightful review. ^_ ^ I worked out some of the confusing parts to make the story flow better - that sometimes meant removing the bits, while at others simply rewording them more understandably. I did intend this story to be a bit more ambiguous than other stories - there should be those shadows and empty spots, mostly because of the first-person narration that's really deeply in Minerva's head (one thing that bothers me about first-person is that writers try to describe and tell far more than anyone would if they were actually telling or experiencing a story). Adding all that background in would ruin the effect of bleakness. If I had stuck with the third-person, perhaps it would have worked better. :(
It's great that you liked how the two of them were portrayed, especially Minerva. She's not the easiest to write, perhaps because she's not given too much limelight in the canon. Or it could be that all female characters are like that for me. :P Thank you very much for this. :) Report Review
So sad :'( I love it though! Brilliant one-shot! and I absolutly love your banners :) I hope your not too busy, but i was wondering whether you could make me a banner or not, see im more or less new to this site and I hve no idea how to put up a banner let alone make one :). If you can I will be so grateful but if not, it doesnt matter :)
Loony lovegoodAuthor's Response: If you want a banner, you'll have to go to the Dark Arts forums to request them. ;) Thanks for reviewing - I'm glad you enjoyed the story. Report Review
I'm not sure why I haven't reviewed this sooner - most probably because I'm very, very lazy. Anyway, I think this is the sixth time I've read this so I thought, eeep, I'm so mean, I should leave a review! xP But. enough about moi.
Tiberius is probably the most canon-like OC I've ever read. In fact, if he were canon he would probably have multiple fanclubs (let's be realistic here. I'm serious. He would. XD) You write him without the unnessecary descriptions, like he is a character you already know inside-out. It's, in a word, amazing.
And Minerva. I've been reluctant to read any McGonagall fics for a long time, ever since once I read one about 'Minnie', who was a slut and whose main aim in life was to win the affection of hottie 'Tommie.' But this. -sighs- You stayed true to her character, and made her feel real. When I went back and read the books afterward, and I pictured the McGonagall scenes in my head, I could completely believe that maybe she had once know Grimm and had a miscarriage and all of that. It all fits in. =]
Your style of writing is fluid and easy-to-read... I don't get bored with description, or connversation. I didn't skim-read a single paragraph! XP I think this is your best fic yet, although all in all you're a very strong writer and should be commended on your skills.
11/10 XDAuthor's Response: Fanclubs? LOL! That's made me laugh so much that I can hardly type. About me knowing him inside out, that's very true, since this is the fourth (?) story I've had him in, so in my mind, he's become like a canon character - fully formed and ready to fit into the right situation. But wow, thank you for the fantastic compliments, it's great to have created a character like him. ^_^There was actually a story like that about Minerva? *is scandalised* Rotten, the things that people write. I'm glad that you think she's in character - making someone like her who's always the strict teacher in the books into someone more romantic is a good challenge, and I worry that it doesn't always work all that well. Thanks so much for this, Saba. It means so much that you took the time to read and review this story, and even more than you enjoyed it so much! ^_^ Report Review
That was beautiful.
"How much of me had they buried with him?" gorgeous line. heartbreaking, depressing and beautiful.
I love the MM/TG pairing.Author's Response: Thanks! ^_^ It means a lot that you enjoyed this story, and that you like the pairing. Report Review
*gapes at screen with her mouth hanging open*
IT WAS FANTASTIC! The way you wrote Minerva was just excellent. Why doesn't this story have more reviews? It deserves Way more than what it has.
Also you wrote Dumbledore really well, he was totally in character.
Your descriptions were mind-blowing, they just sucked me right into the story- give me some of your talent please!! I would be the most happiest woman alive!
But in some part, like when there talking about their child it could be given a teeny bit more description.
Thank you soo much for letting people read this!! =DAuthor's Response: Aww, thanks very much! Your review has made me blush terribly and I can't think of much to say other than a profuse thanks for saying such kind things. ^_^ It really means a lot that you enjoyed this story. Report Review
Overall, I think that this is a good piece. You managed to show Minivera in a different light and show that she is more then just the strict teacher.
The narrative structure was good. I liked how you showed her thoughts on something and then gave us the scene on why she was feeling the way that she felt. It gave a complete picture so that the reader was not confused on what was happening.
The clarity on plot and your writing style were good. The part that I was somewhat confused about, or that was somewhat unclear, was when Minivera and her lover were talking about the miscarriage. It seemed like Minivera thought that it was his fault that she lost her child and he would do anything to have her back? Maybe a little bit more descripiton would help this part.
Overall, it was a good story. I liked it.Author's Response: Okay, I'll take a closer look at that part - it's one of the ones I was already iffy about (but second opinions definitely pinpoint the problems even better). I'm glad it was only that part - it was worrying me that maybe more was too vague, since I'd gone so bleak with the descriptions. Thanks for taking the time to review this, dracoslover1. This review is very helpful and I appreciate hearing from you. :) Report Review
Deary me! Well, what can I say? Which words could possibly do this story justice? Which words have the power to make people cry without them first anticipating it? The words you used.
I love the line about the flat heartbeat of her child, you can carry off description like that.
You asked me to comment on the story by telling you if the story made sense, and yes, it did. And the ending, well, what can I say...bittersweet.
Your characters show a certain inner strangth both through their actions and their speech, something only immensely good authors can write to such an extent as you did.
Sorry, this is a really crap review! I can't seem to say what I want to...! So, well done!Author's Response: Wow, goodness this is quite a review. It means so much that you think all these things about my story, which happens to be the story I'm most proud of. Thank you very much for taking the time to read this for me. ^_^ Report Review
It was simply breathtaking and deserving of way more praising reviews than it has. I was going to skip passed it as its not a story I would usually read but I'm so glad I didn't. You had me gripped from the beginning, that simple question hooked you right in.
Your writing, or the way you write, is simple beautiful. Your vocabularly rich and sentences perfectly constructed I couldn't of stop reading if I'd wanted to. The whole piece just flowed perfectly taking me on this incredibly sad journey with McGonagall.
The characters themselves were flawlessly written. For an OC Tiberus could have so easily slotted into cannon. He didn't seem forced but convincing and unique, as though he had his own place in the series himself. The way he was introduced gradually into the story before he became a true part is the way I would imagine McGonagall letting someone into her life, especially a love interest. Waiting nervously at first completely guarded before he finally managed to push his way in.
As for McGonagall you kept her true to character and yet made her seem completely unique. She never lost that element of strictness and attempt at flawless perfection even when her guard had completely fallen it was there. I think what made the story pleasant to read was that you took something you couldn't imagine McGonagall being and yet made it completely convincing. The two characters played perfectly off each other, their conversations somehow managed to be meaningful and deep and yet they never lost that natural air so they never seemed forced.
It was the attention to detail though that really made this story what it was. The way you built up such a complete picture of the landscapes, the situations and the people themselves. It really made the piece come alive. I particularly loved the line about the sheep although I'm not sure why! This attention to detail stretched into the back story which was portrayed enough, what was there was effective and concise but without leaving me caught up in useless details.
I feel I need to make a quick note about Dumbledore who was written completely true to character. He said enough but remained elusive (if that's the right word it's getting late). He was an important character to bring in at the end as I often feel in the books it is perhaps his friendship that McGonagall values the most.
I have just realised the length of this and I appologise but I'm too tired to edit it and it deserves all this praise. An amazingly well written and spectacular piece of fanfiction. Could have been a missing moment- but would have been better than anything written in any of the books. Author's Response: Wow, this is quite a review! Sorry it took so long to respond to - I really don't know what to say! You aren't the first to mention how "canon" Grimm appears, and it still amazes me to hear it - thanks very much for the compliment. :D I'm glad that McGonagall was in character, placing her in a romantic relationship is a challenge, especially since I'm leaning away from the fluffy type of romance that often appears in fanfiction. She seems more complex than the books let on, at least to me, and trying to bring out that complexity makes my head spin at times. Haha, I'm even more glad about Dumbledore, though, since he's hard to write without alluding to his glinting eyes or lemon drops every line. :P Thank you so very much for taking the time to review this story with so much depth and detail. I really appreciate hearing from you, and all your compliments still make me blush. ^_^ Report Review
I am defiantly at a loss for words. You are sheer brilliance. The way you write, and the absolute power of your words, amazes me. You are extraordinarily talented. I felt like I was reading a celebrated published work not fan fiction. The characterization of Minerva and Tiberius was faultless, and you made Tiberius seem so perfectly real, as if he was written in full in the back of my mind. His relationship with Minerva was so thick I could feel it. And, quite exceptionally, you made me shed a few tears, something I am not prone to unless I've been made to feel something so strongly. You are really, really talented.
(Oh, and I'm currently writing a paper on Emperor Tiberius, and I defiantly noted the awesome name!)
Author's Response: Dani! Thank you! This review made my day, both because it was unexpected and because it's amazingly awesome. ^_^ It's wonderful that you thought so highly of the story (which I was feeling worse and worse about as I wrote, which is usually the way it goes :P). And yes, I do suffer from an obsession with all things ancient Roman, even crazy old emperors, haha. =D I can't thank you enough for this review. ^_^ Report Review
Oooh.. a long one-shot, but it's divided by Roman numerals which helps me out a lot!
I - I love the way you convey emotion through simple facts. Your writing style is very strong and concise. The backstory you are beginning to tell is very well done! I love the idea that she had learned to hide her emotions, and I wonder who "he" is. I'm scared that it's Voldy, but I'm trying to keep an open mind. So far I'm loving it!!!
II - At first I thought that MAYBE, just maybe, this elusive man was Dumbledore, but you introduced the character of Tiberius. I love the way you set up their dialogue. You don't slow it down by adding in unnecessary description. You keep it pared down, and I think that it has a more emotional impact that way. This really builds up some of the background for the solitary Minerva that we see in the series. She has a complicated love, but she still feels passion and uses logic and self-control to keep her real feelings from interfering with her life.
III - This scene is just so well-done I can't really think of a lot to say.. I love the phrase, "The idea of need was one I couldn’t grasp when it came to him." It sums up her whole identity, almost. I really like that Dumbledore was there for her and comforted her just by being there and not leaving her alone. I don't know if you wrote this prior to the outing of Dumbly, but that scene also has more significance because Dumbledore is one of few people who probably knew exactly how Minerva felt.
Anyway, I'm glad you requested this review. Your writing is just - superb, amazing, and any other synonyms that I coudl think of. GREAT JOB!
Author's Response: First of all, thank you very much for looking over this and giving such a detailed review. I really appreciate it. :) I find it incredibly interesting that you thought the mysterious man was Dumbledore - it easily could have been, and it builds up some suspense that I didn't intentionally put there. :P The scene with Dumbledore at the end was tacked on as an afterthought - not only did it bring the story full circle, but it was a nice touch to slip him in as an understanding figure once JKR released her news, haha. That last scene can be read without knowing the news too, but with it, there's a totally new meaning latched onto the story. :) Once again, thank you an incredibly huge amount for reviewing, and enjoying, this story. It means a lot that you liked it so much and I'm glad there weren't any major problems with the story. ^_^ Report Review
Aw that was so beautiful and sad it made my eyes welled-up with tears luckily they did not fall though I'm running out of tissue. And that last line was the perfect ending to the story you are a master of words.Author's Response: Aww *huggles* thanks so much, SilverShadow! I'm sorry that it made you cry, and I'm blushing at your compliment. It's wonderful that the story made you feel that way. ^_^ Report Review
I really enjoyed this thank you. I little look into the distant past of Minerva Mcgonagall...:)Author's Response: Thank you very much! :) Report Review
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