Wow! So powerful. So tender. So nicely written. A little jumpy in the pacing of your writing - perhaps a little more work on your descriptive passages - but good, solid, writing. Well done!Author's Response: Thanks. It's an older piece and needs more description, as you said, but I liked the idea. Report Review
WOW what a brilliant story
i almost cried!
would be 10/10 but...
YOU KILLED HARRY POTTER!
i mean... HOW COULD YOU?
so a mark knocked of for that!Author's Response: Thanks, I know I know, it's a horrible thought, but my boyfriend told me that Harry should have died, that it would make the story better, so I wrote it. I think he just doesn't like it that I spend so much time doing Harry Potter related things, but there you are. Report Review
Aww, good for her. I like this story, it's well-written. keep it up!Author's Response: Thanks, I'm working on it as we speak. Report Review
Hurm, I think it was abit fast and jumpy. Not really really, but just a bit. I liked the idea, of waht Harry said and everyhting. Great job:)Author's Response: Thanks. Report Review
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