I absolutely love the insight and depth you put into these characters! You do the scenes so well, touching on their emotions and deeper feelings in a way that feels very real and true to the books.Author's Response: thanks, that means a lot! Report Review
This is great!
I love the insight into Remus's character, the torment of life and the distraction, yet still somehow seeming to cope with it all. It suits what you'd see on the outside, but gives so much deeper meaning to what's probably always been going on beneath his tired demeanor.
I do wish we'd seen a bit more of what he was actually up to though! What is running around with the werewolves like? I suppose the focus is on his character and responses, so it isn't really necessary. But it seems like you could make a whole fic out of Remus's work. Just an idea ;)
Great work! I'm off to read the rest...Author's Response: thank you so much! Report Review
I just read this entire story, and I loved it. It was very well written, which is always a plus to a good plot. The varying points of view gave great insight into each of the character's reactions to the ever worsening war. The only complaint I have is that I wish it were longer! :)Author's Response: thank you so much :) Report Review
SiriuslylvnSirius25's review #4:
Wonderful. I loved how you made it so Sirius didn't exactly comprehend exactly what had happened even as he stood there in front of the house. Most of the time people tend to have anger wash over him or he somehow knew what had happened even before finding Peter missing. It was a change in view, and I like that. 10/10Author's Response: I'm very glad you did - thanks so much for reviewing! Report Review
SiriuslylvnSirius25's review #3:
I'll get the bad out of the way...there was none! I didn't say anything to really nitpick on, and taking into consideration it hadn't been beta'd, the few grammatical errors weren't even worth noting. So with that out of the way-I adored it. I love the cowardice of Peter, the way you said he knew he would always be that way. Great job! 10/10Author's Response: Thank you! Report Review
SiriuslylvnSirius25's review #2:
I was > < that close to crying. Phenomenal. I love the way you portrayed James as being so sure of his friends, and the subtle hint that Sirius thought Remus was the traitor. But the thing I loved the most was Lily. I am so happy you made her unsure of James' choices, especially when it came to Peter.
There is really only one thing I have to say, and that's one sentence felt really awkward to me...
((Lily’s voice tore at his heartstrings, but when he looked at her – she with her head held high, her eyes no longer glistening with tears and her breathing composed – his heart swelled with pride and love.))
The middle section just didn't sound right when I read it, in my head or aloud. Still, it was another great piece and I look forward to reading the next one! 10/10Author's Response: I'll go back and check that sentence out - thanks for pointing it out to me, and for this awesome review! Report Review
SiriuslylvnSirius25's review #1
OMG! That's soo sad. It was beautifully written, and I loved your descriptions! I could practically feel Remus' pain after going through the flashbacks. I don't really think there's anything bad to say here. You're writing was very good. I think I saw maybe one spelling error, but other than that I didn't find much.
I absolutely love that it was Remus and Marlene as opposed to the usual Marlene/Sirius. Also, the fact that it was Lily who came to him at the end seemed very realistic. She is definitely the caring character who would.
10/10 definitely =DAuthor's Response: I'm so happy you liked this - it was a bit hard to write, truth be told. But thank you so much! Report Review
I love your style of writing, this story has totally hooked me. I can't wait to go read more.Author's Response: Thank you so much! I hope the rest of the story won't disappoint you (: Report Review
i feel horrible for reading it this late, my absence from fanfiction is scandalous. but i was surprised that i didn't have to even go back and reread because the essence of this story is still so wildly etched in me that i remembered everything the moment i started reading this. it made me so sad again. so forlorn and lonely when i read of Sirius in the Azkaban cell, his mind wandering and hearing sirens and being naive to think they would never die. this story was always heartbreakingly gorgeous, written in tender simplicity and really just affecting the reader in a natural way, the emtoions were never forced and i think you should really be proud of this one. because it's perfect. and sad, just like the entire story of the marauders. i'm glad i could be somehow a part of this story and the dedication in your AN means so much to me. thank you for writing this, Steph.Author's Response: It doesn't matter, as long as you've returned. And wow - thank you. It was sad, writing this final chapter, because it was a major project and I loved writing every minute of it (even though it gave me quite some griefs every now and then). And also, it has meant a lot to me that you stuck with this too and that you came back one final time. Again, thank you, Liz. Report Review
Interesting. The conflict in Peter was obvious, and you showed his reasoning for choosing Voldemort cleanly.Author's Response: I'm happy you think so ^_^ Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
Intense. I could easily see how James felt the entire time.Author's Response: Wow, thanks (: Report Review
Interesting. Very well played. Er, well, written.Author's Response: Thank you! Report Review
Wow, what an amazing ending, I absolutely loved it. It was a perfect ending.. I just get so sucked into your writing. As soon as I have more time and get a chance to catch up on everything else, I'm diving into another one of your stories... I can't wait to read more. I loved the ending of this chapter, where it's looking back on the past, how Sirius couldn't remember much, but he realized how life wasn't as easy as he thought. Of course when it goes with the title so well it's a great ending.. heartbreaking, but great. I've enjoyed this story a lot! Great job with it!Author's Response: Don't know what to say... Just thank you so much! Your reviews have been really encouraging and they have meant - and still mean - very much to me. Report Review
okay.Man.I just finished this story! Talk about heartbreaking! you did an amazing job! wow. I LOVED it! *Claps and a cookie* -charlyAuthor's Response: Thanks so much Charly! I've put a lot of effort into this story, so the positive respond always make my day! *shares cookie* Report Review
I have not reviewed the whole story because I didn't know what to say after each chapter, but I would now like to tell you that it was beautiful. This story was happy, sad, heart breaking, and joyes all at the same time. I have always wanted to read a story about what happened in the order before harry came along, and this story filled that void. This story was captivating and addicting. It was very well written and I could feel the characters pain. I loved it! 10/10Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much llamasrule789! You've made my day (: Report Review
You capture the Marauders so well.
I want to punch Pettirgrew in the teeth!Author's Response: I know how you feel! But still, I feel incredibly sorry for him and tried to write him without being prejudiced. Thanks again for your review! Report Review
Hey, this is LucyLovegood from the forums.
This is a terrific start. Your writing style is refreshingly sophisticated. It's more than "He said, she felt, he thought" etc. Your characterisations is tops, Lily in particular -even if she only appeared momentarily. I'll be reading on for sure!Author's Response: Thank you very much, LucyLovegood! ^_^ Report Review
Mind-blowing chapter, as always, Steph. You've incredibly captured Peter. You perfectly brought out the conflict in him. With Peter, it's not black and white, never, and while I believe he wasn't evil through and through, he was a coward and that's sometimes worse than being evil. There are hints of regret, but they're always overpowered by fear, the burning desire for glory...I guess that's how peter really was, always on the border line, leaning more toward the darker side. But still, on the border line. Peter thought he knew better, that's probably the deal. And I'm rambling, but what i want to say that you've done him flawlessly. The little short breaks in the chapter had a great effect on me with the significance of the words. This entire chapter was very powerful and crushing at the same time. It just leaves you feeling empty. Not heartbroken like the other chapters, but so horribly empty, wondering, just like Sirius told Peter to wonder...was it worth it?
Your writing never fails to amaze me. It's just gorgeous. I'm looking forward to the last chapter, even though I'll be a bit sad this will be over. Because it's just such a magnificent story and I can't even properly describe how much I love it.Author's Response: Thank you a thousand times over, Liz. Your review/s mean so much to me, and I'm sorry I can't give the reply this review deserves. It's been a month, and I'm still as speechless as I was then. *huggles* Report Review
Wow, what a heartbreaking chapter. This was really emotion packed and I loved it! This is such a difficult scene/moment to recreate, but I think you did a brilliant job with it. Getting Peter's perspective on this time just makes you think. They just really handed the power over to Peter, didn't they, giving away the secret. No one would suspect him, the misfit, to be the rat. It's sad that Remus was blamed when he really wasn't the one and just how much Peter got away with. No one thought he was capable to do much, but he caused everyone to believe Sirius was the one who betrayed them all. The coward seems to ruin everything. That line where Sirius said they were invincible.. that got me. Maybe if Sirius didn't think he was so invincible.. maybe that would have caused him to think. There's so many what-ifs in the Harry Potter world, which I guess is the reason why there are so many fanfics. I've really enjoyed this story so far, looking at the tradegy of how this all happened. Excellent chapter!Author's Response: Thank you Labby, for this and every other heart-warming and supportive review you've given me. (: Report Review
Hey Steph! I came to check on your story to see if any of my reviews had been lost and only noticed this one *thumbs-up* Plus I just wanted an excuse to re-read your awesome writing. :) I can't get over how wonderful this Marauders story is. It's still my favorite one on the site. I don't know how you manage to write about the Marauders without once lapsing into cliche or cheesiness, the way so many other stories do. Instead of writing about how sexy Sirius is or how James is obsessed with Lily, these characters come across as mature and thought-provoking and so human in your skillful hands. After all, their lives existed in some of the darkest days of the wizarding world - war was raging outside and they weren't all about running around, flirting with girls, and being sexy. I love how incredibly dark and grown-up this story is - you deal with some really tough and intricate themes like loyalty, betrayal, and fear, and you do it so well.
I especially enjoy the way you incorporated what few facts we know about this period of time, and work it into your own cohesive story. Like the fact that Sirius backed out of becoming Secret Keeper and immediately suggested Peter, because he himself was so obvious and Peter would seem like the least likely choice - because let's be honest, Peter IS the least likely choice. I read through this and wished so much that James had agreed to have Dumbledore be Secret Keeper ... but of course then the story would have turned out so much differently than it did.
James and Lily's relationship is written beautifully too. No marriage is perfect and though theirs comes pretty close, I like the way you've written how stressed and strained it became what with all the turmoil going on in the outside world. They're human after all and dealing with some horrible dark times. The ending scene was so scary and sad - it was so sudden how James died and he hadn't even had time to say goodbye to his son and wife before he was gone.
Amazing story ... I can't wait for the last two chapters. 10/10Author's Response: I'm sorry, but no matter what I write in this reply, it still won't give your review justice. All I can say is thank you, for sticking with this story and for your constant support. I can't even begin to tell you what it means to me (: Report Review
Hello! I returned to try to replenish some of the reviews that were lost...sorry if it's not lengthy as before, or if I just jumped right in the middle here.
I do like how you picked a chapter to tell a tale of each character. So many things were happening to these characters back at that point, and it was a great way to see for ourselves each one in a more complete way. The first war held darkness that had to be beyond difficult to see past without a shred of light. And with this chapter, you hit that tone square in the face.
The flow is excellent, building that very darkness with worry and tension. I liked how you placed Molly in here, as well as your use of Dorcas, who we know little about from canon. Your characters are spot on and interesting, and although the story is tragic, your writing style make for a compelling read.
Smiles~LeentAuthor's Response: thank you a hundred times over and over again (: Report Review
This was really sad :( I wonder why Remus just never allowed himself to fall for her. The entire time they were together, even when they were close and happy at Hogwarts, he always kept some kind of rift between them. Was it because of his werewolf-ness? Maybe he feels like he doesn't deserve her, or maybe he feels that she deserves someone better than him. I think I remember that was the whole problem with Tonks in the books, how he felt that she deserved someone much better than him. I felt really sad for Marlene. You can really tell that she cares for him a lot yet doesn't understand the gap between them anymore than he does. It's terrible that the last time he saw her was yet another rejection of being close to her. :(
This was really sad! Poor Remus. Great chapter as always, I love hearing these anecdotes of the Marauders. :)Author's Response: Yes, the reason he never allowed himself to fall for her was because he thought she deserved more. I get the imnpression that Remus has always had incredible self-discipline and that he rarely allows himself to be truly happy, because he knows that it can disappear in an instant. Something like that. And it's sad, because life's too short to worry that happiness can disappear - life itself can disappear and by then, one will be sorry for not enjoying (which is why it makes me happy to think of DH and that he did allow himself to be happy after years of neglect...)! But that's just a personal view on his character... But I'm happy you liked this. Thank you very much for yet another beautiful review =) Report Review
I think my heart just cracked a bit. First off, what a great way to set the chapter...with the memories and present events interlacing each other. I just noticed that you overuse some phrases, specifically 'keep the evil/something at bay'. I think it's been in every chapter up until now and more than once.
But you know what I think about this story...i think it is a really great work of a talented author who is giving these characters a heart-wrenching yet beautiful depth. I don't even have enough words to explain how much I liked the concept of Remus' endless care for Marlene and the ache that he had never truly loved her like she loved him. The relationship between them, so simply and clearly portrayed in those few fleeting paragraphs, was bittersweet but still had the essence of wonder, beauty and sad unfulfillment.
And how we're so afraid to act, until it is too late. Remus in this chapter was a work of genius. His thoughts and inner feelings. The love for Marlene, not in a form hers was, but still strong nonetheless. This entire story is so sad, but worth reading 100%. I believe those times were, after all, full of this darkness you convey perfectly through words, with words left unspoken, hearts left broken and then the lives of the heroes spent, but the memory of them never quite gone. Which makes me think of your title, Never Shall We Die, and it suits this story so well...because even though they're all dead...their deeds, their traces of existence and all that they felt for each other others didn't know about...that's where their immortality lies.
Sorry if this review is incoherent once again, but I'm at a true loss of words chapter after chapter. I love this.
ElizabethAuthor's Response: Aww, Elizabeth. First - thanks for pointing that out. I will keep it in mind when I start writing the next chapter. Gaah, don't know where to start replying. There's much I want to say, but I've no idea how to express myself. When it comes to the title... It makes me very happy that you say that, because yes, they would never truly die - there's much that they did during their lives that will live on after their deaths. It's like that with all of them... And that you liked my Remus. I truly love to write him, even though he causes a lot of pain to write at the same time. For everything he has lost and will eventually lose... Anyway - can't do this review justice, so I'll leave it here. Thank you, thank you, thank you - I can't even begin to tell you how much this means. Report Review
I'd like to start by saying that this will not be a particularly long review. Lengthening it would only entail some form of redundancy and repetitiveness; highly unnecessary because it can be summarised by merely a few sentences:
You are a wonderful writer. Sure, I've only read the sixth and seventh chapters but I believe I have read enough to support that. Your writing style doesn't focus on the raw emotions themselves, but how they really appear, and it doesn't at all work against you. It fits this story and your characters seamlessly.
Also, I've never read a James/Lily fic like this before, never having been much of a James/Lily fan unless the story was fluff and involved Sirius but I digress. I like how you described James and Lily's married life in the sixth chapter; it's very realistic, to the point that it made me sort of think "Hey, that's right. They would have felt that way" and etc. I particularly enjoyed the part which narrated how Lily and James had begun to grow apart. Of course, the Remus/Marlene story cannot be ignored as well.
All in all, your use of existentialism and realism has been exquisite. Your readers will have much food for thought/imagination after reading this fic.Author's Response: I haven't known what to answer, which is the reason for this late reply. Now that's the apology had been made, onto the reply: I'm glad you liked my James/Lily version in this story. Exploring their married life was refreshing, because I haven't read much of their marriage, more of them at school and it's nice to try something else... Argh, seems I can't do your review justice, but nonetheless, thanks so much a hundred times. This review meant a lot =) Report Review
Yay, an update! What a sad chapter though. There was so much loss during that time and it's sad that nothing ever happened between Remus and Marlene. It should have taught him to make most of the time he has with people. As usual your writing is very good and I just love to detail you use. I love Remus's character and it's sad to see him so distraught, but you do him justice. Great chapter and I do hope you have time to update soon!Author's Response: Thank you Labby ^_^ I'm happy you liked this chapter - I had a hard time writing it, as I've mentioned. And that you think I've done him justice. That means a lot! Report Review
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