I seen a few mistakes, but they aren't major. All in all, I really like this chapter. Report Review
Is the story finished?Author's Response: No, it isn't quite finished. I have just now realized that I don't have all that I have typed validated on HPFF, and now that the queue is closed, I can't update, like I'd like to. I will, though, as soon as I realize that the queue is open again. Thank you, though, for wondering if it is done yet, or not! Report Review
Are you going to update soon?Author's Response: Yes, I'm working on finishing the nextcl chapter right now, andim I'm almost done with it. I had to take a months break from it to frantically put together a writing piece for class, a poem for our school "journal," so to speak, and a poem for a contest that my teacher wanted me to enter, and happy to say that I won 1st place and a $50 gift certificate to get books with! Anyway, I'll just finish the chapter, type it, and it'll be up as saloon as its validated!! I'm glad that you're anxious for it though, and thanks for keeping updated on my work!! :) :) Report Review
The plot on the whole isn't bad, but it's a bit inconsistent considering it's supposed to come straight after DH. Although later chapters seem to be written better, and with less of a hotch-potch of tenses (1st chapter - either all in the past or all in the present), so I'm guessing you've taken some constructive criticism on board, or just got into your stride.
There's barely any mention of Fred dying - and losing a brother tends to affect people, and none at all of anybody else. Have they just postponed the trip to Australia? The chapter when they had dinner with the rest of the order could have been expanded - you say they are nervous about it, but then barely mention it. Also, considering McGonagall's reaction to Harry's supposed eath in DH, don't you think she'd be a bit more friendly? And how on earth has the Minister of Magic got time to train prospective Aurorers? Try not to rely so much on what's been said in previous books, but think about what they would say/do in that situation.
Hope you don't think I'm being too critical! It's intriguing anyway, keep going!!Author's Response: Oh, I will keep going, and no, I don't think you're being too critical! I love these rambling reviews, they help me with my writing. They have postponed the trip to Austrailia. I'll see if I can expand the dinner chapter to be a bit more involved. With Mcgonagall, she'll become a bit friendlier later, I'm working on writing that chapter right now, just haven't finished it. She knows there's work to be done, and she takes that seriously, as you know from previous books. As with the Minister of Magic . . . you'll see. I already have that planned out. It'll come up later. I'm also not sure what you meant when you said that it was inconsistant coming straight after DH, and when you said to think about what they would do in a situation. If you could possibly give another review, that would be great! It would really help me to understand your review a bit better! All in all, though, thanks for the review and the help! :) Report Review
good story write moreAuthor's Response: Thanks for the review, and I'll get more up as soon as possible. Report Review
This is getting good. Next chapter soon please.Author's Response: I'll get it up as soon as possible! Report Review
Your writing has improved from chapter one. I like where your story is going, perhaps we'll see Harry show his full potential and power in up coming chapters. By the way your writing is taken on a more fluid movement to it, keep it up.Author's Response: Why, thank you very much! I'm running out of things to write in reviews, so don't think I didn't enjoy your review. Thanks, and I'll get the next chapter up soon! Report Review
Pretty good chapter. I want to see hat they do with this training.Author's Response: It'll be up soon, sorry about the lack of updates recently, the validators caught up to me, and I haven't been able to write fast enough. This time of year is really hectic for me, and so I haven't had as much time to write as I wish, but I'll get it up as soon as possible! Report Review
lol i love how ron goes i love you out of nowhere lol
update soon! =)Author's Response: Thank you, and thanks for reviewing every couple of chapters! Some people just review once, and think that's ok, but authors really like it when people who read it review more than once. Anyway, thanks for the review, and I'll update as soon as possible. Report Review
oh no! thats not good! lol anyway nice chappie! but btw, i thot quartet was only for singing ppl? oh well anyway keep writting!!Author's Response: Thanks, I'm glad you like it! Quartet, Trio, Duo, they can really be used for anything. For example, I'm in a string quartet in school, and that's not singing. But it can be used to refer to any group of four people. Report Review
good job, the recap was a good ideaAuthor's Response: Thank you! I've had mixed reviews about the recap, so I don't know whether it really was a good idea or not, but I'm glad that some people like it! Report Review
I like that Harry takes Hermione and Ron with him when he slips out of the Great Hall. Nice chapter!Author's Response: Why thank you! But, I really can't take credit for that. It was still under the catagory of what JKR wrote. But, I'm still glad you liked it! Report Review
Another great chapter. Keep up the good work, and update soon!Author's Response: Thank you, I'll try, and I will! Report Review
Do I detect a bit of foreshadowing at the end of this chapter?Author's Response: Maybe . . . Report Review
hehe very nice!! Loving the story!! Can;t wait for an update!!Author's Response: Thank you very much! Report Review
I thought this was just another Harry/ Ginny thing, but I'm glad I kept reading. You have a nice story and the writing is good. Please keep writing and try to fatten up the chapters.Author's Response: First, thanks for the review! I'll try to fatten up the chapters. The chapters that I've already written were originally only written for a free writing assignment in class, so I wasn't really going for long chapters, and I really try to stop where it will keep the reader hanging. I'm glad you liked it! Report Review
IM SO CRAVING FOR MORE!!
PLEASE UPDATE SOON!!
SOON AS YOU CAN!!!
AND IM BEGGING!!
THAT WAS LOVELY!!
IM CRAVING FOR MORE!!
I'LL BE WAITING FOR THE UPDATE!!
SO PLEASE DO!!
10/10!Author's Response: Thank you so much! Begging . . . I swear, it'll be up as soon as I possible can! It's up for validation, so now it's up to HPFF to get it through! Report Review
MORE MORE MORE MORE MORE MORE MORE MORE MOREAuthor's Response: Alrighty, then! It'll be up soon, I promise! Thanks for the review! Report Review
Forgot to review the first time this chapter came out. Nice to see their task completed but you're right...short chapter. I look forward to your next post (hopefully soon)Author's Response: It'll be up as soon as the validation in complete. Thanks for the multiple reviews! Report Review
This is great come on you have to keep writing because I can't read it fast enough, though can you include Harry's proposal and Ginny trying to tell her mum while Mrs weasley is to busy fussing over her about other stuff. That would be really funny. This actually one of the only Hp stories that feels like JK's Harry Potter, there must be just something in the style of writing.Author's Response: Thank you! For the writers' duel, I'm writing about Ginnys proposal, and I might see if I can incorporate that into the story, if at all possible. I'm glad that you like my style of writing . . . wow, JKR? Not quite . . . or maybe I'm being modest, I know many people like it, but not sure if it's worthy of something that JKR had invented! Thanks for the review, and keep reading! I have another chapter up for validation, but I'm taking a short break for Writers' Duel. I have two that are ready to be put into the queue, but I have to get to them first. Report Review
Not bad... I was shocked by Dumbledore's reply... but you made it where it could be something he would say... training? hm... I suppose I'll read on.Author's Response: Thanks for the second review! I tried to go off of some things that he had said before, such as Nitwit, Blubber, Oddment, and Tweak, and put it together in a letter to the quartet. I'm glad you thought it was interesting! Report Review
Wow... tell you the truth, I was writing off the corny fluff piece about Ginny and Harry, but when you thought about the warmth of the locket... I thought that was interesting. Mind you I've only read up to this point, but I have this suspicion that this locket will be used sometime later in the book. Maybe Harry's in a battle while Ginny is only standing close by; the locket get's cold, and therefore Ginny is terrified... You know? So many possibilities with this locket idea. I'm impressed. Well done, chap!
PS. I think you could have done better with the love pieces with Ginny and Harry. Suggestion: Try to make sure that what you want the character to say is still within the personality boundaries JK Rowling placed when she wrote the book. It would make the story more believable.Author's Response: Alright, thanks for the review and helpful comments! Really, when I had first started writing this, I hadn't included those parts, but when I started sharing it around, people thought I should, so I added them. Being in 7th grade and never having had a boyfriend before means that I have to go off of things I previously knew, or have read. Gives very limited sources of background, but I make do. Most people like it, and that's fine with me, I'll live with it for now. Later, I'll go back and fix that when I finish the piece. Thanks again for the review, and I hope you like the rest. Report Review
I love your story. I have been reading it this whole time and I love it. It is very original and I love it. Keep writing!
-GiaAuthor's Response: Why, thank you!! By this whole time, you mean . . . ? Not sure, but I'm glad you think it's original. I tried to think of something that no one else would think of, and this is what I came up with. I'm gald you like it, and thanks for the review!! Keep reading, and I'll keep writing! I'm thinking of doing some one-shots, and I'm working on a few, so keep checking back and they'll be up sometime when I get a chance to finish them! Report Review
Ah! That was short. Your story has an interesting plot and story line. I like it for the most part. But you're characters need a little more insight. Their thoughts and emotions need to be a bit more thourough. It's kind of like your speaking more of what's going on and what's going on around them, rather than what parts they play in thier situation.
Great job! Keep up the good work!Author's Response: OK, thanks for the comment! I'll try to be more . . . complete, for lack of a better word. I'll have a new chapter up as soon as I'm allowed to post, since the queue is closed right now, for me anyway. Check back, and review again! The chapters might not be as thourough in the next few, since I've already finished them, and right now, I'm not going back to fix it! When I'm done the story, I'll go back and fix some of those small things, but until then, I guess I'll just have to accept it the way it is!! Haha . . . ah well, Thanks again for the review! Report Review
haha, I love it. Way to go...Author's Response: Why thank you! Keep checking back, and review again! It means everything to us authors! Report Review
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