Reading Reviews for Moving On
  
111 Reviews Found

Review #1, by mef_hplvr Chapter 8

28th August 2010:
This is a great story!! Oh goodness!! I wish Harry and Ginny would just hurry up and get engaged *hint hint*...just joking. but please try to update as soon as possible

Author's Response: Thank You so much for the review! I actually wrote this before DH came out so I decided to discontinue it, nevertheless thank you so much for the review! :)

~Leo


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Review #2, by madelgranger Chapter 6

22nd April 2009:
I really liked this chapter. Ginny's of age! It's definately a good cliffie. Thanks for writing!

Author's Response: Haha yeah this cliffie got a lot of attention :P Thanks for the review! I appreciate all the reviews you've given me! Thanks so much!

~Leo


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Review #3, by madelgranger Chapter 4

22nd April 2009:
This was such a cute chapter. I love fluff! I really like Harry and Ginny (of course), and Hannah was really cute. Thanks for writing!

Author's Response: I am glad you like it. This story is pretty fluffy :P. Hannah was just I felt a cute little girl that could be thrown in :P. Thanks for the review!

~Leo


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Review #4, by madelgranger Chapter 2

22nd April 2009:
I liked this chapter. Ginny is my favorite! One thing I noticed - you kept spelling "through" as "thru" (although that could've been intentional, I suppose). Anyways, I'm quite intrigued by the Grangers' disapproval, so I'm off to read the next chapter!
Thanks for writing!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! Yeah this is one of my old chapters when my spelling sucked even more than it does now :P. Yeah I had a very interesting idea for the Grangers ;). I am glad you like it!

~Leo


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Review #5, by madelgranger Chapter 1

22nd April 2009:
This is great; it's very funny and cute at the same time. Harry and Ginny's interaction was perfect! Thanks for writing!

Author's Response: Thank You I am so glad to hear you like it :). Their interaction I thought was so fluffy :P Thank You for the review!

~Leo


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Review #6, by datbenik513 Chapter 8

9th February 2009:
Nice chapter, without too much ado.
Wedding panic, nerves on the limit...and the wedding itself, which was very realistic.
Very carefully written, your style improved drastically.
The flashback was nicely, seamlessly integrated.
Please update soon!

9/10

Cheers,

Zoltan

Author's Response: Glad you liked this chapter way better cause it is way closer to my current style :P I'm happy to see you liked the flashback too! Thanks for the amazing review! :D

~Leo


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Review #7, by datbenik513 Chapter 7

9th February 2009:
This one was nice, well written, less grammar problems. A bit of a filling chapter, actually, but with some nice little scenes.
Maybe slightly too much detailing, nevertheless, I enjoyed it.

Good job! 8/10

Author's Response: Glad you liked this, and yes it was a filler chapter :P I know too many details but hence the fillerness of it. Thanks for the review!

~Leo


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Review #8, by datbenik513 Chapter 6

9th February 2009:
Spacing gets weirder with each chapter...

The trial part was not that good, to be honest; I felt that the dialogs were rather forced. Also, the trial of such a vaste amount of criminals charged with those horrible crimes, would require lots of preparation, lots of witnesses, and there would be much more legal formalities. It would have been more on-the-spot if you'd indicated the scene took place on the n-th day of the trial.
Walking out from a trial when you are subpoenad as witness, may result in criminal charges against you. I don't know Wizarding law, obviously.
Surprised Umbridge was still there...
Sweet family scene on Ginny's birthday. Only one remark, I can't imagine Molly was happy with Ginny coming of age. beaing a mother hen as she is, she most probably would have preferred her never come of age and be always around.

This chappie was little below the level of the previous ones, still,consistent. A 7 is in place.

Author's Response: Gr stupid spacing. I am going back to edit that.

I really didn't know what to do here to be honest. I think I just wanted to get the trial over with. I may go back and edit it if I can get a good idea of a change I can make.

Glad you liked Ginny's birthday bit. Normally I would have Molly be over bearing but I figured I would give Ginny a reprieve for today and make her have to pay for it with something else later. Plus her youngest son is getting married, she is busy enough as it is. Sorry you didn't like this chapter as much but thanks for the review anyways

~Leo


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Review #9, by datbenik513 Chapter 4

9th February 2009:
This chapter is more dialogue based, at some places I found the pace rather slow, talking of unimportant to the story things.
I did like the part at Diagon Alley, it's nice to see things are going well, shops being reopened, Florean returning.
The Chocolate frog cards of our heroes is an interesting development; one could expect they would be issued very soon after Voldemort's downfall. The ending part with the small girl, Hannah, was lovely. Ginny's sentence was just in place: "Who knew, that the famous Harry Potter is actually good with kids."

Take care for avoiding cliches, otherwise nice writing, easy reading.

8/10

Cheers,

Zoltan

Author's Response: I'll admit this chapter was pretty slow, I really just needed a filler. I did like the ending with Hannah though. Sorry about the cliches but in my defense, when I wrote this over a year ago no one else had written much so there really were no cliches :P Thanks again for reviewing!

~Leo


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Review #10, by datbenik513 Chapter 3

9th February 2009:
OK, the confrontation with the Grangers. From the viewpoint of a Muggle 18 years is far too young to get married, but these kids are old beyond their years. They have seen so much.
You made Harry and Hermione trade places, which is rather interesting. Normally Hermione would be rational and Harry would lose his temper, just like at the end of OotP, when he trashed Dumbledore's office. While it felt a bit off in the beginning, on second thought it made sense, as it underlined the enormous changes these kids went through. How much do you have to suffer to be turned so upside down?

Nice chapter, save the usual punctuation and spacing warnings.

8/10, good job!

Author's Response: That's the idea. Oh why they are marrying young. Most wizarding people got married at 20 anyway. They are just 2 years early because they are mature for their age, and you know, they almost died for each other, that too. I decided to show a bit of Hermione's hot headed side and I figured since this doesn't REALLY involve Harry, there was no need for him to go all explosive. Thanks again for the review!

~Leo


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Review #11, by datbenik513 Chapter 2

9th February 2009:
I told you I'd be back...
Again some formatting and punctuation issues, and
"He sighed and began head back"
should be
"He sighed and began heading back" or simply
"He sighed and headed back"

So, the last train ride home. I was kind of surprised all of them had already clear career ideas, but hey! they are also much more mature than an average 18-year old. Of course, Hermione has the brains to be an Unspeakable, and Harry's and Neville's career choice were also evident. Nicely written part.
Then the confrontation with the Slytherins. While it was rather believably written, I didn't expect them to be at Hogwarts at all, or at least shut their freaking mouths, but on second thought it all makes perfect sense, as in your AU the Battle took place not at Hogwarts, but some place else.
OK, the Grangers. I know already what's in the next chapter, but their reaction is quite understandable. Being Muggles, they might not understand that getting married at 18 is normal in the wizarding world.

Good job!

Author's Response: Eeep more punctuation :P

I'm glad you understand that I have the characters a certain way for a reason, and that when I said this story is AU I meant it was AU. A lot of people don't get that for some reason. Anyway, the Slytherin part just so of struck me for some reason, but I am glad you liked the chapter as a whole. Thanks for the review!

~Leo


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Review #12, by datbenik513 Chapter 1

9th February 2009:
Hi Leo,

As promised, here I am with the reviews.

First, the bad news, but you already know them. Some punctuation problems, mostly missing commas, some typos. The indenting is funny and there are too many empty lines between your paragraphs, which doesn't help the readablilty of your text.

Second, the good things, there are more of them :)
The introduction with Harry paging through his photoalbum was perfect.
The characters are believable. You managed to add some depth to them.
There are some nice phrases I really liked, e.g.
"she made sure to sway her hips and flick, her messy but still gorgeous, red hair"
Post-Battle fics do have a high probability to end as a bunch of useless cliches, So far I haven't found any of those in your story, but you have to be careful.

So far, promising, and surely not bad for a first fic. Good job and an 8.

Cheers,

Zoltan

Author's Response: Thank You so much for all the reviews. Yes I know the punctuation pretty much sucks. I can't even believe i made so many mistakes. I'm glad you like the photo album bit. I took me a while to come up with a good starter idea. I'm glad so far there are no cliches. Thank You so much for the review, glad you enjoyed :D

~Leo


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Review #13, by Sierra Govett Chapter 8

30th October 2008:
I loved it! Please keep writing! Is something going to happen with Harry and Ginny soon?

Author's Response: Thank you! I'll try my best to keep this story up :D And of course something is going to happen soon! Some characters are going to come in and stir up a little trouble in paradise ;) Thanks for the review!

~Leo


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Review #14, by Poetic_Ruby Chapter 8

27th October 2008:
I liked it! It was nice and simple and the memory was a cute touch. Hermione's moment of panic was brilliant, too, lol, because it definitely sounded like the overreacting Hermione usually does sometimes lol.

Author's Response: Haha I'm glad you liked the Hermione part. I came up with it at the last minute :P. I am so happy that you liked it though. I've been so busy and I'm trying to write more now. So hopefully more stories will be up soon!

~Leo


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Review #15, by SexyDoorFrames Chapter 8

14th October 2008:
The chapter was amazing. I loved it. Awesome. 10/10

Author's Response: Thank you! Glad you loved it!

~Leo


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Review #16, by The Other Dobby Chapter 1

9th October 2008:
There's a heck of a lot of smiling in that first paragraphs. I'd recommend using some synonyms, otherwise it gets repetetive. You have a thru in there, which is really only acceptable in drive-through windows and chatspeak. As a quick test, try reading fics aloud to see if the commas and stuff are in the right places. Otherwise, a good start.
The Other Dobby

Author's Response: I agree. Way too much smiling. This was actually my first story and looking back on it I can see a lot of my flaws. But I do appreciate the advice as well as the review. Thank you so much :)

~Leo


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Review #17, by avidfan68 Chapter 8

9th April 2008:
Good story so far. I just finished reading all 8 chapters, so I thougth I'd finally review.
I liked the re-introduction of Dean. Something fishy is going on with him. I wonder if his new job is at Hogwart's so he can be close to Ginny? Just a guess!
I also enjoyed the banter between Hermione and Ginny and Harry and Ron about the weeding day jitters. Cute.
Thanks for a nice read and keep up the good work.

Author's Response: Oh thank you! I'm glad you like it. Wow you are really observant....especially with Dean. As far as his job...well....you'll see ;) And actually the banter was a last minute addition, but I thought it would be a nice add on. I'm glad you like it! Thanks for reviewing! :)

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Review #18, by westcoastlovex Chapter 2

27th March 2008:
I'm a bit bored.. but you seem like a good writer.. so i'll keep reading...-jessie

Author's Response: Sorry you're bored, it gets better. And soon more exciting. Thanks, glad you think I'm a good writer.

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Review #19, by westcoastlovex Chapter 1

27th March 2008:
I've never been a fan of Hogwarts era stories.. But ill give yours a chance...-jessie

Author's Response: Thanks. Glad to see you're giving something new a chance

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Review #20, by OmiXitsXJaime Chapter 1

13th March 2008:
Hiya, Jaime here! *Smiles foolishly* I love what you've written so far and am about to cry because I cant read anymore until tommorow. Bye bye for now and keep up the good work!!!

2000/10 =D

-Jaime

Author's Response: Haha! hi Jamie! Oh well thank you! I'm sorry, that you're about to cry! But I'm glad to hear you'll be reading more! Thanks so much for the awsome review! I need to hurry up and write more! :P

-Leo


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Review #21, by Voldemora Chapter 1

24th February 2008:
Aww, that's so cute! Really great!

Just one problem. This sentence:
However Voldemort and his Death Eaters suffered many more casualties and that was the way he liked it. -- That sentence isn't very in character for Harry to me, since Harry hates any death at all, and I doubt that he'd outright say that he liked it that they had more deaths.

Otherwise, great story!

Author's Response: Thank You! Glad you liked it! Hmmmm I guess it's not very Harry like. That line didn't come out the way I wanted to. I meant for him to be happy that less of his friends than DE's died. Hmmmm I'll go back and do a little editing. Thanks for the tip though!

Thanks for reviewing!


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Review #22, by sexysirius Chapter 8

23rd February 2008:
omgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomg evenif that is the end update UPDATE!

Author's Response: Haha I'm glad you like it! I'll try and update as soon as I can but school is kinda kicking my butt right now. But I'll try. Thanks for the review!

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Review #23, by sexysirius Chapter 7

23rd February 2008:
wowowowowowowow luv it it rules

Author's Response: Thanks I'm glad you like it :D.

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Review #24, by sexysirius Chapter 6

23rd February 2008:
i swear fred tonks and remus are meant to be dead but it's so good i absoloutley adore it this is my 2nd favourite story on fan fic it is seriously good

Author's Response: Thank you :D Yea like I said before I wrote this pre DH and it's AU. But wow Second favorite! Thank you so much :D And thanks for all these reviews!

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Review #25, by sexysirus Chapter 5

23rd February 2008:
the battle bit was excellent i love it

Author's Response: Thanks! I was a little worried about how that part would come out, but I'm glad it came out ok. Thank you for reviewing!

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