That was beautiful. I love that it went from sad to hopeful. 10/10 : ) Report Review
adorable! if i could just leave it in one world i would love that, but i can't because of the rules hahaAuthor's Response: Awww, thank you, Carol78y. :) I'm so happy you thought it was adorable. Report Review
write more. darn it i read a BUNCH of one-shots for quick reading and my response is always U NEED A SEQUAL NOWWW!Author's Response: Sequel? But it's finished. ^_^ Heheh, thank you. I'm glad you liked it. ^_^ Report Review
that was beautiful.
i love this story soo much.
omg..i didnt think i would ever like a one-shot this much.
you also helped me discover my new favorite ship
draco/luna is amazing...so thanks for making me obsessed lol.
off to read more draco/luna stories!Author's Response: I'm very very happy that you liked this story. ^_^ And I'm glad that you fell for Draco/Luna. Thank you so much for the lovely review. Report Review
The emotional language in this is stunning. Quite possibly, the best usage of words EVER. Great job.
I'm kind of speechless... this was just so fabulous. Breathtaking.
It's been the only Draco/Luna fic I've ever read and the only Draco/Luna fic I think I'll ever be able to read. You know? I mean, I'll forevermore compare those fics with yours... heh, I feel BAD for anyone whose Draco/Luna fic I read and review! LOL!
Your character development was fabulous. Luna was Luna and Draco was what I'd imagine Draco to be. GREAT JOB! You did a truly wonderful job!
And I apologize that I've pretty much nothing more to say. You're story was quite simply too great for words. Really, you left me SPEECHLESS!!! (no one EVER can do that, so congrats. lol)
I GUESS I'LL JUST HAVE TO GIVE THIS PERFECTLY PERFECT FIC A PERFECTLY PERFECT 10/10 FOR YOUR PERFECTLY PERFECT JOB BEING PERFECTLY PERFECT DONE!!!
You've given "perfect" an entirely new meaning to me. You've raised the bar for my expectations of all other fics I may read in the future.
:) :) :) :) :)
-SheaAuthor's Response: I'm so sorry it's taken me ages to answer this lovely, lovely review. I've been away from writing for awhile now, and it was a well needed break. I'm back now. ^_^
I don't even know what to say. Your words are beyond any answer I could give you. I'm just so grateful that you think so highly of this story, that it managed to touch you this way, that you think it's perfect. Thank you so much, Shea. I cannot give you words that could be enough. Just know that I truly appreciate it. Thank you. Report Review
This is DA Jones and this is the review you requested in my thread. I go by a different name on the forum.
Wow! Is all I can say. This is the best fic I've seen in a long time and I read a lot of fics. I'm a big sucker for Draco/Luna or really any Luna fic though, so there might be some bias.
I think you did Luna very well. That line in which she introduced herself to Draco and the crack about Luna not being well-known. And this wreck of a Draco is truly well done.
I choose to believe that in the future of your story Luna eventually cures him and then once Draco is back to himself, he dumps her for the more suitable bride Asteria. Partially because he can't stand that she's Potters friend. But somehow Luna isn't bitter about it.
The language is very evocative and lurid here and it is executed perfectly. I can find nada to criticize.
So a ten and also added to my favorites. I hope you set other pieces inthe world of this fic.
DA JonesAuthor's Response: No, no, no... no dumping for Asteria. ^_^ My canon ends to the books and that's why I chose Luna... blond hair. ^_^
This story was so eager to get out. I've never felt like that when writing a story, not the same way. It's just wonderful to hear that others have liked it, that it has made a difference. ^_^ Thank you so much for the lovely review. I'm actually beaming here because you couldn't find any mistakes. Yay for that!! What a wonderful gift to receive. Report Review
I like this story. This is how I actually pictured Draco living after the war. Oh and this song is also sung by Lacuna Coil. You should check it out.Author's Response: Thank you for reviewing. ^_^ It's always fun to know what people think of these stories I write on my free time. ^_^ Oh, I must find the song... I love it, no matter who the singer is. Report Review
Impressive. I really enjoyed this one. I love the Luna Draco pairing, and you pulled it off amazingly well. Awesome!Author's Response: Now I'm in Christmas spirit. ^_^ Thank you for the lovely review. Makes me feel so happy. Report Review
oh my god i love thisAuthor's Response: Oh, I'm so happy you do, Kyrandia. Thank you for telling me that. ^_^ Report Review
Wow this was really wonderfully written, and I can easily see that you're an excellent writer. The first person narrative pulled me in right away, and it was really nicely done to give the reader a look right into Draco's thoughts. He's very wry and sometimes sarcastic, but then he's also loving - I really love how you've written his romance with Luna. Draco/Luna is one pairing I am not willing to believe easily, but that scene was very sweet and when he is looking at her and then stares at himself in the mirror as a man in love, it was very realistic. The song fits in really great. I enjoyed reading this piece! :) 10/10Author's Response: That was just amazing of you. Gosh, I don't know what to say. Draco/Luna is very strange to me as well, but somehow... in this story, she was perfect for him. Nobody else could have played her part. Thank you so much for reviewing and saying all these wonderful things, Girldetective85 (by the way, I love your nickname). ^_^ Report Review
That was brilliant! I love stories that feature Luna as a prominent character. Well done and keep writing!Author's Response: Yay!! I'm so happy that you liked this story and my little Luna. *big smile* Ah, now I can relax... it is good enough. ^_^ Thank you for the lovely review. Report Review
Woah!! I just realized that I didn't review this AMAZING story. Rebekka!!! I love it!! I've been on the hunt for good Luna/Draco stories lately and I found this one and KNEW because you had written it that I would love it. And I was right. I love the pain of the story - the sheer emotions that you've put into Draco. You've gotten Luna JUST right and you've created this magnetism between them that's insatiable. I love it.. there are hardly any words to describe it.
Totally amazing, darling. Keep the awesome work pouring in. ^_^Author's Response: Oh Jessi, thank you so much. This review made me feel so happy. Draconian Punishment is a very personal story to me and for you to like it... thank you. It means so much to me that you left a review. *hugs* Report Review
Wow like Depeche Mode and Tori Amos totally rock (both of them) !! NIce musical taste and wonderful story, there should be more one-shots like this, really you're really good, write more I mean one-shots!! And could you read my "Who is that girl?" story just to see if you like it,please?Author's Response: Um, it's nice that you reviewed, but the site does not encourage people to use the reviewing system for asking reviews... there's a forum for that. I checked your story, but in all honesty, I'm not a reader you're looking for. I'm too old for dress-ups. ^_^ I wish you all the best as a writer. Thank you for leaving a review. Report Review
Me again, for one more! And by the way, I'm curious, where did the title come from? Where's its meaning? I'm trying to read all kinds of lovely things into it, but I'm wondering what your thoughts are as the author!
I loved this little piece. Truly. It has some wonderfully fun characterisations of Draco and Luna. Delightful, true to the characters but definitely also uniquely your own.
I like the idea of Luna as his "secretary" or really as his help mate, the rescuer, the one who makes him a little more sane. He should be sane, but he's got this whole crazy thing going on, and who does he turn to and lean on? The craziest girl we know.
But I like how you've grown her and matured her past the little girl..
Ah the part where Luna is washing Draco's hair - LOVE IT! Something about it is just so... intimate, yano? And the lines after that, where he says her name, and she tries not to show how it affects her. You've got these utterly lovely moments sprinkled in here that makes me sigh happily. (o:
And she reads him, reads his mind or whatever you want to call it. Again, so intimate and special. There's something about intimacy and those special things that I really love reading.
I find myself wishing that she could be enough, that I would never feel the need to leave, ever again. Ugh, I like this line. Just really heavy... Especially coming from Draco.
She doesn’t say anything, she can’t. There are no words, never have been, never will be. Really nice. I just love this, the dual hope and despair stuck within phrases. Ah, just wonderful. There's all this subtext beneath your words and it's utterly delightful!!
What a LOVELY one shot, my dear! I love the part where Draco suddenly realises he's in a towel and hovering over her. Teehee... (o: Me thinks that's a fun little awkward scene, but I love it because he's there with Luna, queen of obliviously awkward. And it's so believable and so random at the same time. I really like it. And I love that she makes the moves and pulls him into it... Bliss, hehe...
Great job making Draco sound like a mad scientist. He truly does sound that way, the way his mental processes bounce around. This is brilliant! Fun and very original characterisations!
Loved it, and this is definitely an awesome story. (o:
Author's Response: Oh, a novella again. ^_^ I adore your reviews, girl. Thank you for leaving them. *hugs*
Where does the name come from? Hmm... I had an image in my mind about Draco, him hating himself so very much for all the stupid things he had done and for the weakness in him. I just googled "draco" and found the word Draconian (dictionary: Exceedingly harsh; very severe). I fell in love with it. It was so perfect for the story. He's severely punishing himself for being who he is. And of course Draconian fits because of his name. That's where the name came from. ^_^
I so adore you for reading between the lines. Thank you for the extraordinary review. It's a gift to write such reviews, you know. Thank you. *huggles* Report Review
That... Was rather brilliant.
Lol, your writing skills are amazing and it has such a fine plot I don't know what to say!
ElvenAuthor's Response: Wow, thank you. I left you speechless? That's just wonderful. I'm really very happy that you loved it. ^_^ Report Review
awww thats so sweet!
LOVE IT!Author's Response: I'm really happy that you took the time to review. ^_^ Thank you for the lovely words. Report Review
Wow. It's one awesome story! For some reason I couldn't concentrate on reading anything tonight - that was until I came across this. I don't even normally read Draco-centric stories, but this one took away my breath and the ending sent shivers down my spine. You are a brilliant writer, and I'm adding this to my favorites:)Author's Response: Wow, thank you. It means a lot to me that this story captured your attention. ^_^ Oh and I'm absolutely thrilled to hear that you loved the ending. Thank you so much for leaving a review. ^_^ Report Review
Sweet and awesome story!Loved it!Author's Response: Thank you, dear. I'm very happy to hear that. ^_^ Report Review
So sorry for getting here so late! Work is an absolute terror. Okay, before I say anything else, you have to realize that my thoughts are an utter swirling mess right now. Usually, when I review stories, I can pick out a few central things that the author did well, maybe recurring themes, or specific characters that I'd like to point out. But with you, everything… absolutely everything is worth its weight in gold, and if I had my choice, this review could stretch for miles. I could point out every other sentence and feel how much thought you put into choosing the words and phrases. So if this review seems vague at times, it's because I love this one-shot to death, and I'm unable to express it in words worthy enough for it.
Where should I begin… I guess just Draco. I have never read a fanfiction and liked him. Never. I admit that most are ridiculous Dramiones, but still, no one has put so much life and soul into him. When I read your Draco, I can forget Tom Felton for the blissful duration of the story, and instead, I can focus on what he's made of - the helplessness, the confusion, the numb pain, the overwhelming emotions he tries to suppress, his own mocking self-loathing hidden underneath, and his tremendous ability to start anew and love in the end. As he narrates, I can almost hear that low, quiet, bitter and slightly sarcastic tone, observing and analyzing everything around him including himself, but all the while tainting it with his own broken faith and hope. There's a small sentimental part of him that values simple things still like his old wand (for some reason, him missing his wand touched a chord in me), or a quiet smile on Luna's face, or just the soothing feeling of being near a human being who won't judge him. Every few sentences, it's like you peel off another layer of him and express someone more vulnerable underneath until there's nothing left. And then you build him up again with, of all the people you could have chosen: Luna. God, I never even considered the pairing, but after this, I think it's probably going to be one of my favorites.
How shall I describe your Luna? I think she is the bane of every author's existence, lol, except for the people who truly understand her nature. What I love best about your Luna is that you don’t merely tell what she's doing through tags like, "she said whimsically", or "she looked off into space dreamily" like other authors do. Instead, you speak through her actions, her matter-of-fact irritation, her exuberant un-held back smile at the end, her gentleness and iron strength beneath her frail surface. It's just so… real. When I stop to think, she IS one of the few who would give Draco a true chance to find his way in life again without passing any sort of judgment. In her own way, she's Draco's escape from the world, isn't she? Yet she also manages to be his link to the real world, someone there to guide him, someone for him to return to at the end of all things. She is absolutely stunning. I'm astounded by how you manage to create such multi-faceted characters within a single piece of writing. With most writers, it takes chapters to reveal the amount of personality you've managed to show here with each aptly-chosen sentence.
There are parts in this story that make me sit there, shivering and feeling so much pity and sorrow well up for Draco. I just have to point out these sentences and tell you how much they hit home. For one, the part where Draco muses about catching Luna's strength, where he wonders if there's a recipe for courage, analyzing it again, but not really seeing just courageous he truly is himself, especially at the end when he vows to keep on trying, when he's finally come in terms with his own flaws. He underestimates himself. And god, this sentence: "I was born wrong… never was able to please anyone, never was able to even kill one single person. And I tried so hard to fit." Just. Wow. It speaks volumes; in one simple sentence, you've capture Draco's torment in HBP, his inner-struggle and cowardliness in DH, his continuous self-loathing that we never get to see after the war ends, but one that we can guess. You've put it into words so eloquently, so heartbreakingly. Yet he was proven wrong, wasn't he? For once, he fits with Luna holding onto him, grounding him and giving him hope.
You have such an elegant style of writing. The words seem to melt into each other, and I can't tell the beginning of one scene from the end of a previous one. I just start reading, and I can't stop. There was this need to know, to explore what Draco was going through. There are no gaps that feel confusing; there's just an endless buildup of mixed emotions, crazy feelings, and pure, unadulterated angst. The angst! You are incredible; I've found myself a new hero(ine) This is going in my favorites, and boy when I get the chance, I really need to check out your other pieces of writing. I'm going to put that on my list of personal reviews :)
One last thing: beautiful banner, haha! Older Draco looks so sharp and stunning and, dare I say it, hot :]Author's Response: Two things: First, Draco is my favorite character and my personal project. I'm saving him. ^_^ That's why he might be a bit deeper here than anywhere else. Second, I adore you for commenting the banner as well. It inspired me to write this (I was halfway through the story when I asked melihobbit to make it). Every time I felt like I'm never going to be able to finish this, I just looked at the wonderful banner and thought, "Melihobbit made this for me, I want to show it to people. I must write." LOL, that must be the silliest reason to write, but it helped me. This story wanted out. It was desperate to be written. ^_^ So the banner was definitely a good way to lure it out.
I am so very grateful that you took the time to write this amazing review. I am stunned by it. I'm so very humble before it. I feel so utterly happy. I can't even begin to tell you how excited I was to receive this. It made my day. It made my whole year. I don't care that my stories never get that much attention; all I care that the people who notice my work... feel strongly about it. I hope that someday I'll be able to write stories that will make people laugh through their tears.
And I'm so happy that you thought that my Luna was in character. I was a bit worried about it since my hubby said to me after reading the first draft: she's not really Luna. I had to go back there and write it all over again to give her more of herself. I'm glad that I managed to do that. I didn't add much, but I think I added all the things I had in mind but hadn't written down before. ^_^
And I'm just sooooo happy that you thought it was angsty. When I wrote this, I didn't feel anything. I was just a mere tool to get it out. I only cried at the very end when he says he was born wrong... there I started to live through it. But before that, I was just writing it. I'm a very emotional writer and it was very weird to write a story this way. I've never written anything like this. I guess that's why it's my favorite. It's completely different from everything I've written before. ^_^ Thank you, dear. I will remember this review always. Even when I start writing my own fiction, even when I'll be a struggling writer... I'm going to remember your kind words. Thank you, truly. Report Review
That was beautiful.Author's Response: You know, I love these kind of reviews. Just one honest thought. It makes me feel so happy. Thank you. ^_^ Report Review
Draco as a drug addict? Very interesting.
This would be a really good short story or novella. It's a really good idea and well-written...but I think the longer length would give it more credibility. Author's Response: Well, he's more like a potion addict, but an addict anyway. ^_^ I was thinking if I should make this a short story, but it wanted to be written like this. I'm glad you liked it even though it wasn't quite what you wanted. Thank you for the review, dear. ^_^ Report Review
that was very good, in a vaguely depressing kind of way. you did a wonderful job.Author's Response: Thank you. Vaguely depressing? Good. I'm so glad that people feel the darkness of it. *hugs* ^_^ Report Review
*sigh* I don't know how to start, really, I don't. I can't pick one little thing out of my mind to say about this, because there's so much. It's just... so... good. People should take lessons on how to write angst from you :)
There were some lines in this that I think are quite profound, and certainly some of your best work. "walls that have never even seen paint, people whose eyes are closed even though open". How do you write like that? And how do you make something so simple become so meaningful? I'm so jealous. :) Also, another of my favourites: "I was born wrong, parts of me never fitting anywhere, as though I had too many arms and legs, too many heads, too many faces..." that is just... amazing, right there. I know exactly what you mean without being able to quite explain it.
I love, love that Snape left all his life's work with Draco. It's quite touching, really -- Snape never having had a son, Draco probably came close to being the only person Severus really cared about in the world. And there's wonderful irony in the fact the Draco is now helping to find and capture the remaining Death Eaters :) Beautiful storytelling. I'm curious, did you have any interest in Draco/Luna before writing this, or did you just think that she would be the perfect match for him? lol. It's funny, I wouldn't have believed it was plausible until I read this. Now I think they're meant for each other :) Luna is so brilliantly written. I love her line about seeing the tomb of John Constable. Absolutely classic Luna Lovegood. XD
Like I said, this is absolutely amazing, dark, poetic, stunning... and I'm so very glad you wrote it :) Going straight into my favourites.Author's Response: You are one amazing person, dear. Thank you. I'm speechless. I don't know how to respond... Myabe I'll start from the question. It's good to start from the end. ^_^ I don't like Draco/Luna. I've never read one single story about these two together. I wrote about them in Interviewing a Death Eater, but that was just an experiment. This... I told you. This story wanted to be written. I had absolutely no choice in the matter. So Draco/Luna was just something that was almost canon. Hermione is with Ron; Ginny is with Harry. Not many girls left. LOL! But I adore both of these characters. Luna is definitely one of my favourite characters (the actress is a perfect Luna in OoTP)... and putting these two together is kind of magical. I love Luna's otherworldly reactions and Draco's intense feelings. They are very different, yet somehow similar. They are both a bit extreme. ^_^
Ah, your words mean so much to me. You always know what to say... and poetic? I always thought it was your and forsakenphoenix's field. ^_^ I'm just so happy that you think it's dark. That means a lot to me since I couldn't see it myself even though that was the idea.
Thank you for letting me know what you think of this story. Thank you for helping me with it. Thank you for everything. *hugs* Report Review
I loved the connection between Luna and Draco in this fic. You managed to maintain it right through until the end without making it all fluffly.Very well written!!Author's Response: Yay!! Now you made me really very happy. ^_^ Thank you so much for the review. I'm so glad that you loved the connection between Luna and Draco. I love it, too. ^_^ Report Review
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