I didn't think anything could be worse than your grammar but to have Harry physically striking Ginny, maintaining that he's done nothing wrong, with no one saying a word against him for going too far, and the Weasleys still allow him in the house? Friend of the family or not if anyone treated their daughter like that they would have asked him to leave. In the least Harry would have immediately realised that he had gone too far, tried to appologize, or offered to leave himself.

Abuse of any kind should never be author sanctioned or left unredressed. The characters must be made to account for their misdeeds. Bad form, Ms Potter.

 Report Review

"McGonagall had owled them telling Ministry people would meet them in the 15th so they could decide what they would do with the house—Godric’s Hollow. Harry wasn’t sure he wanted to be back in that house in the state it was. But, he could probably find his parents’ stuffs, like photographs and other objects."

Correct English:

McGonagall owled them, letting them know that ministry representatives would meet with them on the 15th to explain to procedures of repairing the Godric's Hollow house. Harry was nervous about returning to the house while it was still in disrepair, but he was anxious to find any of his parents belongings that might still be intact.

Also, "Stuffs" is never a word.

 Report Review

You need an editor desperately, this is painful to read!

 Report Review

This is an awesome story. One of the few I've read here that does not have Harry/Hermoine getting godlike powers or being heirs of the founders or queen and kings. The story moved me to tears.
Excellent work!

 Report Review

I am liking the story so far but can't stand your grammar..sorry..it really is awful

 Report Review

Well done. I love the plot. Hermione slapping Draco was great. I thought she was going to be kind for a second with her touching his chin like that. I feel like you should've made that part a little more menacing instead of like talking to a small child.

As a side note you have a lot of spelling errors. Mostly with tenses. You've also put in that 'Harry released...' instead of 'Harry realized...' There's loads of other stuff in there. I would recommend going through it again and editing. It's a great chapter but the errors in verb tense are bad.
~Meg

 Report Review

I don't know where it is, and I should have commented on it when I saw it, there is one paragraph that makes no sence at all. Please reveiw your own work and look for it. It's in the last three or four chapters.

 Report Review

I really enjoyed your story. There was enough danger and intrigue to make it interesting. The relations with Ron and Ginny were pretty good.
I don't know what a beta is, but if it like an editor, they need to recheck your work. The is a lot of gramatical errors and some of it just didn't seem to flow like it should.

 Report Review

Wicked. but i love it!

 Report Review

just a little something i've noticed: hope u dnt mind.
it's realised not released.
just plss tk cr of tht whenevr u next edit..

 Report Review

Wow!
I am falling in love with this story as it proceeds.

moving on now!! can't hurry enuf 2 d next chapter.

 Report Review

i read a few paragraphs in and i cant continue, the grammar is very horrible. And Kreacher is meant to be talking in 3rd person and not saying stuff like 'random'. Cliche'd story, i dont like it

 Report Review

Wov a very interesting read alltogether ..i like it very much...thanks

 Report Review

nice .i like it very much and am trying to reach the minimum required 20 characters.

 Report Review

I absolutely loved your story! thanks for writing it, now I'm gonna go find more of them so I can read them too!

 Report Review

this is one of the best. i regret your decision not to make a sequel. :( but otherwise, i enjoyed this story a ton. =D

i_love_harry_12721

 Report Review

I loved this, I really did! I kinda wish it was longer but you can't have everything right? The last chapter was excellent but it would have been cool if Harry had announced to everyone that he had a son, like James did in the memory. But hey thats just my opinion =] Also, the bit where he tells James everything was a little cheesy but apart from that I loved it =]

Great job!

 Report Review

NICE STORY!HOPE YOU WILL COME OUT WITH MORE EXCELLENT STORIES.

 Report Review

That was so sweet! Great job and very well done! I loved seeing how nurturing Harry was with James and I loved everything about it. :D

 Report Review

I am more a fan of the dark and painful but I have to admit this was a very good story. I am a big H/HR fan so its nice to see another one. keep up the good work you wrote a great story.

 Report Review

it would hav been better if dey wer both married

 Report Review

I'm really sorry, but after reading the first paragraph I must say that there is no way in acertainplace that I'll ever finish reading this story, let alone finish the chapter. As an English Lit student I'm absolutely appalled at the lack of proper punctuation, the poor word choice and the abysmal flow of the story. It just hurts to read this. Sorry!
Is English your mother tongue by the way? In any case you're in desperate need of a new beta, because the one you've got is really bad. There is no way that a self-respecting beta would ever let you post this story in good conscience. I would advice you to take more time writing and re-writing your stories and then send them to a good beta. Hopefully, reading books will help you with all the issues you have with grammar.
I hope this will be a bit of a wake-up call for you, so that you can (hopefully) improve your writing.

 Report Review

AW! I LOVE IT! PLEASE CONTINUE TO WRITE H/HR STORIES!

 Report Review

I can't go on reading. Is English not your first language? You even had a beta?

 Report Review

GREAT! I LOVE IT! PLEASE CONTINUE WRITING!

 Report Review