hm.Well I read the whole thing and thats a start :] Most of the time I just stop reading a story. But there are a few things, in some part you talk like your just making an extra note of things. Like here:"Draco and Hermione were sitting at opposite ends of the couch in their common room, which they got for being head boy and girl." Theres just something about the "which they got for being head boy and girl" part thats brings down the sentence. You gave lots of detail though and it has a good plot. Report Review
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