I really enjoyed this!
First off, I just love your style of writing. It has such a nice flow to it and it almost makes the story seem rather poetic too. :)
Secondly, I love your portrayal of Remus and Sirius. I also loved hearing Remus' side of finding out Sirius' betrayal since we never really learned much about what his emotions were.
I loved the touching moment between Molly and Remus too. I've always felt as though she is a motherly figure to all of the characters in the book. You write her very well too :)
I enjoyed this! Very well written. :)Author's Response: I'm so pleased you enjoyed this! Ah, my style of writing. It has taken years to develop and I still think I'm changing every day, haha. I do tend to have a bit of poetic flair, I'll admit. :)
Remus and Sirius are seriously the best characters for writing angst. So much material to go off of. Grief and betrayal are my favorite things to write. ;)
Yeah, Molly is definitely very motherly and I couldn't have Remus starve. It helps that she's lost family to the war too, so she knows how he feels in a way, minus the whole betrayal bit.
Thank you for the kind review! :) Report Review
Gah, gah, gah this was just so fantastically wonderfuly BEAUTIFUL. This might be my favourite of everything of yours that I've written just because it was truthful and, I don't know, I just loved everything about it.
I liked him talking to Kingsley, Minerva (who seemed so soft and warm! And I don't mean that in a bad way, I liked it) and everyone that stopped around. It was nice, and I thought the ending was just such a perfect way for things to finish.
I could gush about this one for a very long time, trust me :)
-ACAuthor's Response: This is probably one of my most favorite stories too. I think it's one of my best written, that's for sure. It's very raw and grief-driven, which is always fun for me to write.
I love writing Minerva in a motherly role for the Marauders, like she looks at them as if they're her children, and it's always how I've thought of her so it fit very well in this. Kingsley was a last minute addition, but I think it worked.
I'm so happy you loved it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thank you for all your lovely reviews, they mean the world to me! Report Review
I love how you can put so much description in your stories. That's the key of a good writer and obviously you are one. I think it's almost nice the way you write Sirius and Remus.
I mean I still ship Tonks and Remus, but I'm not thinking that this completely of the charts.
I think you did such an excellent job of portraying their emotions and relationship. What they were both going through really came out, and I got a really good sense of how it was going.
You are really a good writer :)
LizzieAuthor's Response: S/R is my OTP so I do enjoy writing them a lot. I'm glad you're sort of warming to the idea that there could have possibly been something between them. I love writing emotions, especially when it comes to angry, grieving, broken young men so I'm glad it worked well for you. Thanks for the compliments and for reading and reviewing! Report Review
LOVED this piece. Again, you've explored some really neat and under-appreciated moments here.
Sirius's emotion in the first section was so real to me. I love the physical touch you gave the magic used to bind him to James and the undoing of the Fidelius Charm. That's really unique, I think, and it definitely drew me in to your writing. I also really loved the tenderness shown in Remus and Sirius's relationship. Even simple, faithful gestures have so much meaning, like a last kiss before departing. Remus's feelings of betrayal were also so, so real. You wrote them very well. I loved the line about how Sirius's only tattoo isn't a Dark Mark; instead, it's an inscription that makes even less sense in this moment.
As always, your imagery is spectacularly vivid. I also loved the attention paid to background characters like Minerva, Molly and Kingsley. The ending was interesting as well, the transition from drinking to forget into drinking to remember. Poor Remus has a lot of pain, and you write it quite well.
academica (Slytherin)Author's Response: Hi!
Sorry it took me FOREVER to respond to your review - no excuse.
I'm glad you enjoyed it. I absolutely adored writing this story and I think it's one of my best.
The whole 'physical touch' thing is definitely something that appeals to me, that helps me bring to life how solid their friendship is, how real it is.
I love delving deep into the mind of a betrayed, grief-stricken Remus. It's a lot of fun writing angst. I love when you pick up on details, like the whole tattoo thing.
Thanks for the lovely review and for enjoying this! Report Review
hello there! this is AditiDraco95 from the forums!
Omg, this was such a deep and intense fic. Even though I don't like slash, I found this heartbreakingly beautiful. I loved the way you wrote Remus. Sirius' characterization was good too. I liked when Molly comforted Remus, it was touching.
Overall I found this entire fic very moving and the emotions came across strongly.
Very well-written. Great job!
End of an Era review extravaganza
Forum Name: AditiDraco95
House: SlytherinAuthor's Response: Aw, thanks for such a lovely review! Glad you read it. :) Report Review
This was incredible. And that's an understatement.
I love Sirius/Remus. One of my favorite ships. So when I saw this, I got really excited! I think you did such an excellent job of portraying their emotions and relationship. What they were both going through really came out, and I got a really good sense of how it was going.
I love how you can put so much description in your stories without making it "flowery". It reads like a published book, which I cant say a lot on the site.
You have such a talent for writing. I reallly did enjoy this :D Great job!
-NaidatheRavenclaw, RavenclawAuthor's Response: Remus/Sirius is my OTP so I'm glad you love them as much as I do! I love writing angsty fics where I can explore grief and anger. Remus and Sirius are the perfect subjects for that. I think it's funny that you say I put so much description without making it "flowery" but that's how I would usually describe my writing, lol. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing!
Thank you for taking the time to read and review. I'm really glad you loved this. I think it's the best fic I've ever written, personally, so it's nice to hear good things about it! Report Review
I really enjoyed this! Everything seems to flow perfectly. I liked the confusion felt in remus, how he was unsure of his emotions, at loss with the situation. I find that very realisic. My favorite part was without a doubt the dream.I liked how it revealed everything, but without making it stand out too much, that impression of the memory fading after a dream was mastered in this story. The fact that we can't remember, but e can FEEL the dream. My only critisism, would be that last part, it's sort of unclear when it's supposed to be, and where. But other than that i really loved it!!^^Author's Response: You didn't have to review just because I reviewed yours, but thank you all the same! I'm glad you enjoyed it! I'm not quite sure where the confusion is in the last part? The story was written pre-DH so Remus survives the war (which lasts longer) in this fic. It says it takes place twenty years after Halloween 1981 and he's back at the bar where he had drinks with Kingsley before. Hope that clears things up! Thanks again. :) Report Review
Another well written story. :)Author's Response: Thank you! Report Review
This was beautiful! I'm a huge Sirius/Remus shipper, and this is one of the best stories of the pairing I've ever come across. Not only do you write beautifully, but you can write this pairing while keeping the two in character (which is surprisingly difficult, as testified by the hundreds of terrible Sirius/Remus fics out there)Author's Response: Aw, thanks! Remus/Sirius is my OTP and my favorite characters to write so I'm glad to see I'm doing a good job. Report Review
that was really really well writen.
i mean it's hearbreakingly sad, but its brilliant.
the last bit was so sad. with the ghosts of familiar faces.
actually it's a bit depressing. i think i'm going to have to read something funny after this :]
i loved the part with molly. i think you described her so well, and how she helped him.
10//10Author's Response: Aw, thank you. This was sad to write but I think it's some of my best work, if I can be so humble. ;)
I hear that a lot - that people have to go read fluff after reading my stories. I'm okay with that. I love writing angst.
Thank you so much for your review. Report Review
you have the very uncanny ability to make me cry. i don't know how you do it, and i wish i had that gift, but reading this makes me believe in everything, and nothing.
not to mention it makes me terribly incoherrent. i love this.Author's Response: I'm okay with making you cry. You have no idea how your words affect me, how they make me feel like I'm something great. Thanks. :) Report Review
GAH, darling this was beautiful! Honestly, your description, it blows me away. You make the words seem alive, and the sentences flow so beautifully together! I loved the focus that you had on Remus' feeling, and the insight on exactly what it must have been like for him. I can honestly say I never paid much mind to how lonely those years must have been for him.
I think especially that last paragraph really brings the entire piece together, cementing it and just bringing the entire fic to life. I wish I had your talent. It's not story-telling so much as it is painting a picture in people's minds, and you do it brilliantly! Author's Response: -glomps- Thank you for such a lovely review! Using the staff competition as means to get you to review my stories was a good idea, i guess. :P Report Review
Hmm. I really liked this, and I myself am more partial to femmeslash.
I think you were worried that the characters seemed OOC, but I think you captured the tragedy of loss well.
The only thing I didn't quite enjoy was the dream bit. It was artistic, but I think that Remus was lost, he would dream about Sirius, killing Peter...or something like that. I don't think Remus would think about what Peter did with a mind muddled with loss.
All in All; really nice. :D
Author's Response: Well, I'm glad you enjoyed this despite it not being your exact cup of tea.
I think loss is a very easy emotion for me to write, for some reason, so I'm really pleased to read that it works well here and I didn't completely butcher it.
I can see your POV on the dream. I kind of wanted to add in a hint (albeit not very subtly) about the truth of what happened, but of course, Remus doesn't understand why his subconscious is telling him that. I guess it was a pretty obvious thing to attempt that just fell a bit flat.
Thanks so much for your review. :) Report Review
Gees, first of all, I have to praise your excellent writing skill. The story's wonderfully well written. I won't usually read this pairing but your writing style got me hooked.
To the story:
The first scene with Remus and Sirius made me quite curious and interested; they were best friends and obviously lovers, yet Sirius couldn't trust him and left without a word. The emotional turmoil he was going through that moment was absolutely well described. I love it when Sirius kissed his lover a last time before he left and this sentence was adorable:
He kisses Remus one last time, eyelids fluttering closed, letting his lips linger for a moment. He turns away quickly, afraid that any longer and he will be too hesitant to leave Remus’s side now that he knows the truth.
OMG, the next scene(s) in Remus' POV was/were even better. I like the scene when Remus felt remorse and anger when he heard the news from Minerva about Sirius' betrayal. You captured the moment very well, it was perfectly well described, especially I liked this one paragraph very much:
The tattoo was something Sirius had done just after they left Hogwarts, a reminder to himself of the boy he once was, who had stepped out of the shadows of his surname to create a bond with three friends, a bond he promised to never break.
The dream Remus had and Sirius being so affectionate to him, that was cute, (sorry for the lack of a more appropriate term) I am really speechless. And then Peter coming into play, killing his two best friends with the Unforgivable Curse. Wow, the scene was so wonderfully described. I'm amazed how you captured the encounter between the two lovers and the real traitor.
Before I forget to quote it down again, here's the line I love so much from the next scene:
...to make him feel old and weary and that she shouldn’t tell him how to deal with his grief. But he can see loss in the lines around her eyes and sometimes, sometimes he forgets that she’s already had to bury both her brothers.
Awesome, really awesome. With Molly comforting Remus and caring for him like she'd do with her family.
Oh wow, I really have to add you to my favourite author's list. (I only pick the best!) Did I mention that I LOVE your writing style? ^_^ Your descriptions are brilliant, my dear! The story it itself didn't seem rushed, it flows perfectly well. The characterisations of Remus, Sirius, Peter in the dream, then Minerva and Molly, all are canon. Fantastic.
^_^ Report Review
That story was incredible. Beautifully written, heartbreakingly honest and just about perfect in every aspect - I applaude you. I adore your characterisation of Remus and the detail you put in was just perfect - it seemed like every single word had a purpose in the story, which I suppose is what great writing is.
Minerva’s eyes widen and her hands shake. Remus sees the sky in her eyes, sees the sadness, like rain clouds, darken the bright blue and he’s already falling away from her, from her outstretched hands that want to grab him and hold him (because he’s as much her son as they all are, they all were).
That was one of my favourite bits - I love the bit about them being her sons and the falling and - oh, it's so beautifully tragic for both of them and you've written it so well. I only hope that one day I can write this ship as beautifully as you.
Perfect story - I commend you. Report Review
That was beautiful. It was Slash at it's best. The imagery in this piece was inspiring. Your characterization was amazing. The way you write Remus is what I call perfection. You have broken my heart in this piece, there was so much pathos towards Remus, and hatred towards Sirius. Even though we all know that Sirius was innocent, you made us all hate him for what he apparently did to Lily and James. You have made the story flow beautifully between events.
The dream was heart-wrenching and left me in near tears. You wrote Sirius wonderfully. The adoration he clearly had towards Remus was lovely. The romantic scenes you included were heartbreaking.
Even thought the on-shot was long you managed to pull it off. The way you wrote this was canon. The piece was truly realistic. You have made the reader feel such empathy towards Remus, and the other characters included. Truly magnificent work Missy!! Author's Response: Aw, Jemma, thank you so much. You're too kind. I think this is one of my better works and I'm ridiculously happy that so many people love it as much as I do.
It's hard to write fics prior to PoA knowing what we do about his innocence, but it's kind of interesting to see if I can actually convince readers for that brief moment of time that they're reading this that he's guilty.
Thank you for your compliments. I'm so unbelievably flattered. Report Review
Wow. I think this is an awesome story. You really feel the emotions and it is so real. I think you capture the esscence (sp) of the Marauders wonderfully and you tell their tale well. I really think you did a great job, capturing all that would hav gone on and its great. I really like the little touches of the tattoo and stuff, very nice. I think your characterization is rally good, they are very cannon and well developed if you ask me =) A Great Remus/Sirius, keep it up!Author's Response: Aw thank you. Remus/Sirius is my OTP so I love writing them. This is one of my better works so I'm really glad you liked it. :) Report Review
Remus swallows thickly. “Yeah? What’d he say?”
“A lot about love. I bet it’s hard to live with what he’s done. I can’t even understand…”
I don't know why, but this piece made me tear up. Loved this story, absolutely loved it. *favourites it*Author's Response: Aww, poor Remus. I just want to snuggle him. Thank you so much for the review and the favorite. You're awesome! Report Review
Hi! You've been widely reccommended as a good read, and by some of my more favorite and respected authors, so I thought I'd come take a look, heh. And indeed, I was highly rewarded! (o: Let me first say that I rarely read Marauder stories, but for very good authors, I'll go for it. Or perhaps, just for slash, heh...
So moving into the review! When we get to the scene were Lupin wakes up without Siurius... Eugh, it's gut wrenching reading about someone leaving another. I feel so bad for Lupin. I don't know why it does this to me, though a lot of it has to do with great writing, but I just feel so torn up for the person feeling such ache and loss... And then, it's multiplied by his belief that Sirius has done the unthinkable...
There is no spell, no potion that can even attempt to mend the gaping wounds that tear and ache inside his chest. Beautiful line.
But he can see loss in the lines around her eyes and sometimes, sometimes he forgets that she’s already had to bury both her brothers. What alovely way of putting these characters into perspective and bringing out more than their older-selves... As I said, I don't read Marauder stuff much, but this is brilliant and perfect for me, getting to see who these characters were when they were younger. I adored Molly's small scene...
'her words offering him the world.' That line just makes me go, 'mmm..' I dunno why, it just does. Carries such weight and meaning. Very nice.
Eugh, wow, heavy ending. A lovely piece here. I shall be marking you to read some more stories! I'm terribly busy and time constrained in the next few weeks, but I do promise to come back sometime!! (o: Report Review
Oh my god, oh my god. I am so in love with your writing and I don't ever want you to stop, you hear me?! :) Oh dear. How shall I start. All right, well, how about the first thing I fell in love with (there were lots of things, I assure you). Sirius' eyelids fluttering when he kissed Remus' cheek. That may sound silly, and so insignificant in what is such a wonderful, layered story, but honestly... I love things like that, because I can see them, because they're real. And there's so many real things about this. Remus climbing out of bed and getting his ankle tangled in his sheets just filled me with joy; I so love it that you put those little things in. But to be perfectly honest Missy, you could write a novella about Remus going shopping, doing his laundry, taking out his rubbish, and I would still lap it up, and it would still be incredibly poetic and resonant. I love spending time with your Remus and Sirius, any time at all -- I suppose because we know how precious their time is together :)
Remus' reaction to Minerva's news. Uh. It killed me. So intense and tangible, and his anger... I don't know how you captured it but you did: the anger mixed with grief over Sirius' betrayal, and his underlying love which (I don't think) was ever quite fully extinguished, despite the hate raging on the surface. How beautiful that you made his inner war reflective of the war going on all around him, of which Sirius and Peter were a part. Like I said, there's so many layers. I just adore the way you can explore these deep, complex emotions and then just completely bring it back to something real, like him stepping on a broken cup; he's still in the world, still having to live, to get up, get dressed, despite all these things weighing on him. I felt his emotion so much.
The dream was frightening and awful, and I panicked, just like Moony did, thinking it was real, that you had somehow made this AU where Peter does kill Sirius. :'( It was amazingly done. And I would like to pinpoint one line: "tears spilling like prayers from the mouths of saints." Perhaps my favourite line in the story, and so, so interesting that you should use it for Peter. We don't usually associate Peter with saints or prayers, but perhaps the tears are prayers for what Peter could have been, had he chose a different path? I don't know. God, your words are lovely.
I could a novel about this and not say enough; so I won't bore you with any more :) Just for what it says about loss, and grief, and love, this is amazing, even without the other fantastic little details. *sigh* I've missed your stories. Report Review
Beautifully written. I could actually feel Remus's pain and confusion and shock. Report Review
As someone who normally loathes and despises the present tense, you did a very good job of this. My only complaint is that the dream thing feels a little out of place, as if you're trying too hard to tip him off that it wasn't Sirius. But it was still well written, just like the rest of this piece, and it was marvelous at making you feel the sense of absolute utter loss that Remus feels. It's magnificent, and I love it. Author's Response: Yeah, I sometimes have problems with adding things in my story that aren't always necessary but I want them there to make easier transitions into things. I'll keep that in mind for future reference though and make a point to avoid doing that. Thank you so much for reviewing. Report Review
I knew you would make me cry. After Remus woke up, I cried openly - in a bus. Again. You always do that to me. I find this story to be one of your best work. I can't explain why, but it's just so amazingly well-written and the words you use, the sentences... I can't believe that you're not a poet. You should be. Every story I read from you makes me feel like I've found something extremely precious. I want to hold it close to me. Your words touch me so deeply.
Remus' sorrow is so tangible. I don't know how you always manage to make it so real, and it's never melodramatic. It's always so god damn real that it makes reading almost painful... and yet, there's some kind of an inner peace behind every word you write. I tried to find you examples... it's the way you describe things. You have your own special way of showing things and it's such a beautiful and serene way. Gah, words are never going to be enough. I just love yours. Author's Response: I love you! Okay, so, I think that's the second time I made you cry on a bus. Maybe you shouldn't print my stories out and read them on public transportation. ;)
Yes, so, thank you so much for your kind words. I never know how to respond to your reviews because they are so precious to me. Just...thank you. :) Report Review
This is a good story. Normally I don't read slash only because I find where one of the characters is completely OOC or it is not a well thought through plot line like your story is.
There were no grammatical errors as far as I can tell.
The only thing that I can find concerning is the conversation between Kingsley and Remus. It seems like you are having them being good friends. I don't know if that is ever talked about in the book, but here it is not completely over whelming so it takes away from the integrity of the story.
Overall, it is very good and I thoughly enjoyed it. I am going to add this to my favorites.Author's Response: I read on the Lexicon somewhere that Kingsley speaks to Harry about James with a sort of familiarity that might mean he knew them before, so I just drew off of that. But thank you for mentioning that it just didn't work for you. Sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn't. :)
Thank you for reviewing! Report Review
That was really beautifully done. I quite enjoyed reading it. Thank you for asking me to review. :)
There are so many things that I could say about this piece, but I hardly know where to begin. I think one of the great things about it is that it will appeal to a whole bunch of people. Even though slash is a major part of it, I don't come away thinking about that aspect. You've done a magnificant job of conveying the feelings of loss and abandonment Remus must have felt, not only when James and Lily died an Sirius got shipped off to Azkaban, but also when Sirius fell through the veil.
You captured my attention from the very beginning: I really couldn't look away. I like that you began with Sirius leaving. The way you demonstrated the bond between James and Sirius (seeing as they were best mates) was great. Of course he knew something wasn't right!
I love to experiment with this style of writing. I've only done a one-shot that his the same kind of "present" feel (in which I consistently spelled Regulus 'Regulas'), but I really love to read it. You brought tears to my eyes. Your descriptions were spot on and I just all around loved it. :)
nana_banana_xx3Author's Response: Wow...thank you so much for the very kind review! I'm always worried when I write slash because I know of people stipulate that they will not review slash when opening up review threads, so I find it more difficult to get the same amount of reviews compared to if I were to write a simple gen fic. But with fics like this, the story is mostly about Remus and his grief, so I feel as though people shouldn't really be looking at the slash rather than the story as a whole, so thanks for bringing that up! :) Report Review
Terms of Service
categories & genres
short story collection