I really liked this! It was very sweet, and I found no spelling/grammatical errors. I don't usually like stories with lyrics woven through, but I think I'll make this an exception.

Author's Response:
Aww, thanks! If you liked this, perhaps you'll like the sequel.

Carrie

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Aww, this was really sweet. I love the idea behind this and how Seamus tries to get away from the wizarding world after Dean's death. This was truly beautiful.

Author's Response:
Aww, thanks so much!

Carrie

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Oh, it's so sweet! *sighs*

Author's Response:
Aww! Thanks, Saba!

Carrie

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Awe! Yay Carrie w00t!! I loved it. It's teh shizz. 10/10 with a couple of stars and smiley stickers and let's add the fray too!
~Mollie

Author's Response:
Yay! Heehee! Thanks for the review, Mollie!

Carrie

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Hello, chic =]

Aww, I felt so bad for Seamus. I just wanted to give him a big hug...lol
And I really like the fact that you chose him as the character to write about - rarely have I seen a fic that characterises one of the more minor characters so well. I really liked and will be sure to check out the sequel.

~Reine~


Author's Response:
Aww, thanks so much, Reine!

Carrie

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I should think that 'crumbled' should be 'crumpled' ??
There are some rare punctuation mistakes, but nothing that everyone doesn't make, just missing out a few commas:)
no other mistakes are present:)
It's a good story, but no time to read the sequel, I'm sorry:(
No probs, I'll give the rating, 9/10
sorry but I couldn't give ten, for no story is just perfect, but yours is quite near to it:)
Good Luck:)

Author's Response:
Thanks so much for the review!

Carrie

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Well I loved the country song huge fan of it really. I am not going to give you a good review I'm going to give you a truthful review so here goes.

Good stuff:

You seemed to know were you going with the story the whole way through, and you made sure that you kept it going. The characterizm of Seamus was well done, and you had a good sense of emotion for each charater.

Bad news:

althought you may have an expanded vocabulary I only saw a small portion if it. Were was all the description? You could also have spent some more time introducing Meg to us so that we knew a bit more about her appearence. There were some mispellings as well and you should try a beta.

Other than that the story was amazing.
well done

7/10



Author's Response:
You mean characterization? If so, thank you!

Thanks for your advice.

Carrie

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That was a sweet and touching fic. To be honest with you Anyone/OC is not realy my cup of joe but I liked it. It seems like something that owuld appear in Chicken Soup for the Soul. However maybe next time you could slow the pace just a little bit, or expand the time frame because I found it just a wee bit hard to believe that Seamus is head over heals over Meg in just what a couple hours? I leked though that oyu made it friendship-y toward the end. Keep it up!

XxVampireXx

Author's Response: Aww, thanks for the review! I'm glad that you liked it!

Carrie

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Very good. Any sort of story about Seamus is sort of rare. So it is always nice to see one in the archive.

He's a little to dismissive of Lavender's death though. I understand that Dean's death would hurt him more, but you may want to work on showing just a tad more emotion there.

Just to raise the angst level a nouch or too.

Well done!

DA Jones

Author's Response: Thank you so much. I'll work on the Lavender part. Angst isn't my strong point, and I'll work on it. Thank you so much for the review!

Carrie

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Good chapter. I think there could have been more descipiton in it though. Like why Seamus entirely gave up on magic---what was it about the deaths of his mother, his best friend and his girlfriend that would make him want to deny the main part of who he is. And why is Meg wanting to deny herself being a witch and work in the Muggle place? What is Meg really like besides a witch that works at a bar?

Other then that it is good.

Author's Response: Thank you! I was planning on going into the whys in the sequel sometime. But thanks for the suggestions, etc!

Carrie

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I like this story, it has a lot of originality. I liked that you concentrated on a more minor character, took his personality and kind of blew it up to fill a story, filling in the gaps with how you saw him. You also did a good job of integrating the song lyrics into the story. Overall, this story is quite good. 10/10, you might even consider a sequel.

Author's Response: Wow, another sequel suggestion for this! I've actually got the sequel up. It's called 'More Than a Love Song.' Thank you so much for all of your kind words.

Carrie

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Fantastic. I was browsing stories and I clicked on this one. I didn't even realize you wrote it until I was dine reading this.
Gen

Author's Response: You were 'dine' reading it, Gen? Naughty, naughty, but thanks for the review.
Carrie

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Here I am, ready to review! ^_^

I liked it! Seamus/OC isn't my favorite ship, but when the fic's written well, it's enjoyable to read about. The song fit very well with the story - I've never heard it before, but the words fit perfectly.

This is just me, but some of your sentences seemed a bit short and choppy, and a few things were repetitive. I think you can make some of your sentences longer, maybe combine some of them, which could also help not repeat things. Now this was only in a few places - overall, it wasn't too bad.

Your spelling and grammar - I congratulate you, it was great! I didn't see one spelling or grammar mistake throughout the whole fic.

Honestly, I think that Seamus would have NEVER let it slip that he was a wizard, but I suppose it was the only way that he could find out that she was a witch, and so on. It went just a tad bit fast, with Meg inviting him over to her house and everything, only after they'd talked.

You ended it well, but I felt that the last sentence was just a tad bit confusing, I had to read it over a couple of times. Overall, you did a great job, and I enjoyed the fic! It was really cute, and definitely well thought out.

8.5/10

*Lauren*

Author's Response: I am go glad you enjoyed it! This is my first shot at a Seamus fic, period. I'm glad the song fit the story. I was just listening to the Cars soundtrack, and I had to write a fic with this song.

I'll work on the choppy sentences. I'll re-revise. And, yes, English is my best subject in school and always has been. Yay for good grammar!

And the Seamus letting it slip, I couldn't figure another way for him to find out about her being a witch.

Thank you for your kind words and for your critisism!

Carrie

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Fantastic! Well written and a nice flow to it. I liked it a ton -- going in favs.
Nothing to C/c on from me -- Great job!!
Keep writing!
Love ~K [9/10]

Author's Response: Awwww, I'm glad ya liked it!
Carrie

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That was soo sweet Care. It was one of those stories that played with a single moment filled with emotions. and the song fitted well.

Well.chowder, see you at TST
10/10

Author's Response: Aww, Penni! Thank you so much. I'm on my way to TST! LOL! Thanks for the ten!
Carrie

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It's Brunilocks from the Got Fanfic team!

Interesting choice! I liked how you characterized Seamus, seeing as we do not know much about him or his background. You dove deep into his emotions and the plot was nicely done. I almost expected it not to be so good, since most of the seamus fics I have read aren't up to par. But you did a fantastic job.

Now, I don't think The Final Battle would be capitalized, seeing as it isn't a Proper noun. the final battle is how it should be. Apart from that you did great. Keep at it ;)

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I always worry about my characterization, especially on minor characters like Seamus. I'm so glad I did well with that. I'll fix the final battle thing. I only capitalized it because of the fact it was an event, but I see your point as well. Thanks so much for the review and for getting it done so quickly!

Carrie

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Hey, it's Claire from the forums.
First off, it's Seamus Finnigan, not Finnegan =]
Besides that? What a lovely story you've got here!
I must admit that I was tentitive to read a Seamus story...merely because the few that I have looked at have been below average. However, once I got further into the story I could tell that I would not be disappointed.
You've done a great job characterizing Seamus, because as readers we barely know him.
This was beyond sweet, "'Yeah,' Seamus answered. You are."
I also like that you didn't make the two jump each other...the relationship goes slowly, which is much more believable.
Overall, great job.
I really enjoyed it!
xxx

Author's Response: Stupid computer. I typed it that way, but the computer changed it to 'Finnegan.' You know how computers are.

I'm really glad you liked it!

Carrie

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Ahh! I absolutly LOVE THAT SONG! Lol and the movie.. this strory was SO CUTE! You should do a sequal, like Seamus and Meg marry or something

Author's Response: Aww, I'm glad you liked it! I have been contemplating a sequal. I think I shall. I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Carrie

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Since you love your oreos, you get a good sized review! Hehehe
Wow, this was very moving. It wasn't one of those 'OMGI'mgonnashagyounow' fics, but rather just one of those 'moments'. There aren't as many out there as there used to be, so it was good that this one could be one. =)

We haven't read much about Seamus in the books that gives us a HUGE description about his personality, so I think that this helped with the insight of his character. I love how you made Meg a muggleborn witch, she reminded me of Hermoine a bit. And I as well loved the whole

“Yeah,” Seamus answered. You are.

Part. =P It was an awesome addition. Wonderful work! I usually don't like the minor character stories, but this was lovely.

Author's Response: Aww, I'm glad you liked it! I don't actually like to do those 'OMGI'mgonnashagyounow' moments. I do have a fic *coughcough* in which that happens on the occasion, but I personally like those 'moments' as you called them. I find them much more romantic. I'm glad you liked my characterization. I always tend to find that the hardest bit.

So, so glad you liked it!

Carrie

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