Reading Reviews for Give Me Moments
  
24 Reviews Found

Review #1, by HugsandKisses15 Four

9th October 2009:
So, just wondering, but are you planning to continue this story?

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Review #2, by :( Four

4th November 2007:
update soon please...its been a long time since u last updated :(

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Review #3, by Romina Stephanie Four

13th September 2007:
And yet another well-written chapter. I read this some days ago, but at that point, I didn't really know what to say. There was very much to say... I can't say it was all that eventful and I would've loved it to be a litte longer. But hopefully, the next chapter will make up for what this chapter lacked (though, it wasn't all that much!)

Overall, I liked reading their potion-making scene and the scene by the lake. James's reactions at having failed so many times was heartfelt, and I felt sympathy for him. Lily surprised me; she was very tolerable and patient and I liked that. In most stories, she screams at him for opening his mouth. I'm glad this isn't as all the others J/L I've read. But that's not the point right now, so moving on: as I've said before, I really like the way you've portrayed them both. I wonder how things will work out now that she walked out on him by the lake. If she's angry with him - as in James - for it... I mean, why would she be? He didn't do anything wrong... But I suppose it's not always fun to hear that, no matter who says it.

Then we have Severus and Lily. I'm glad you've kept this canon and kept them as being friends. Perhaps that was originally planned, but since I don't know if that's the case, I'll guess =p He seemed a little soft, but I assume that's the effect of having Lily near him. Terrible though, what he said. I wonder if James really misunderstood it. He probably did... Considering Severus's feelings for her. I'm eager to read some more about the two, though I'm more eager to read J/L and I'm curious of where they're heading now...

Then we have Remus and Sirius! Despite their short part in this chapter, I'm glad you included it. Make the readers know that there's still something going on between them. Of course, I'm curious about the two of them as well. I know this is mostly centered around James and Lily, but it'd be nice with some more Remus/Sirius.

All in all, this was written beautifully and you painted clear pictures in my head. Not overdone with descriptions and balanced with dialogue. That always keep it interesting. The story is coming along nicely and I am, as mentioned, eager to read more. Wherever you decide to take these characters, I'm sure it'll turn out to be splendid. Keep it up!

Author's Response: Originally, I had this chapter very long but it'd be TOO long really, so I'm making that overflow into the next chapter. I'm sorry this one wasn't up to par, but hopefully you'll stick with me for the future :) I promise, the next one is eventful!

I wanted to make Lily a bit more patient in this chapter to show that kind side to her that we heard about from Lupin's perspective. I understand if she was being short with James for bothering her about something, but when it's her duty to teach him something and he gets upset, then she'd feel guilty rather than mutinous. It's a bit hard to explain, but I'm glad you appreciate the outlook :) I think she's just mad at James because he blurted it out so viciously, and maybe because he didn't understand hers and Severus's relationship at all.

I actually twisted that part in my favour, about Lily & Severus. I hadn't intended on giving him a large part in this story, but given the facts in DH, I decided to go with it. It's too delicious to pass up! and that softness is just for Lily - as you can tell from past chapters, he is most certainly a git :)

I don't know why I threw in that random little paragraph, but I wanted to show people what was going on while James was away from Remus. Sirius and Remus took advantage of that break, while James felt heavy guilt for it. I just found it a bit funny :P

I'll try so hard to get a good update up for you soon! thanks so much, I really do look forward to your reviews :)


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Review #4, by Faiiry_PriiNceSs Four

11th September 2007:
Amazing, like always. And that was still an odd twist on things for Snape. He should really think things ot before hes speaks haha. Like that isn't going to make you look bad. "I just want him to get hurt and you will laugh at him and finally see what I offer and we can run off into the sunset." I know, I over exaggerate.

Author's Response: haha, I know, he really doesn't think before he talks around Lily. he's too eager for him to like her and hate James.

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Review #5, by joojoo Three

28th August 2007:
Oh, this is lovely! I absolutely adore this... and the fact that you show Lily as something except the rule-abiding know it all that everyone else portrays her as makes me want to squeal with joy. You keep everyone in canon - except perhaps Pettigrew who seems quite sharp in this story... though I guess that's far more interesting to read than turning him into a fat, ugly, cheese-loving tag-along. The best bit is the fact that you actually allow James some slip-ups ( like the one at the end of this chapter) which shows that he still holds a candle for Lily, though it's not one of those constant streams of complimetns,etc. ... which generally gets tiring after a while.
I really can't believe you don't have any more reviews. For a story like this one I'd expect far more... I hope you do get them coming in soon. I can't wait til you update with more! I shall be waiting!
~joojoo
x

Author's Response: I think I have hardly any reviews for this because I am so very, very bad at updating! haha, I try. I love writing Peter a bit different to how other people see him, and I don't think he could possibly have been friends with the other Marauders without a bit of a spine. don't worry though, he'll be a bit of a git too. glad you're enjoying this!


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Review #6, by joojoo One

28th August 2007:
I ADORE the introduction to your story. It's absolutely amazing. The line "As adolescents go, this May was a brat." just got me hook, line and sinker. It was so brilliant... there's no words for it. And such perfect deptiction of British weather. We really have no seasons. *sigh*
But yes, I love it. And it's great how there seems to be a bit more to James than the average cocky prick that loads of people show him as. I'm off to read the rest of the story! I can't wait to see where you take this!
x

Author's Response: We do have really bad weather on our side of the pond, don't we? I'm in Ireland, and seasons are just non-existent. I really wanted to play with the weather in this story, sorta contrast and compliment it. but I digress - thank you for the lovely review :)

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Review #7, by Faiiry_PriiNceSs Three

16th August 2007:
This story is as amazing as the other two so far =] I like what you are doing with it. I'm glad Lily decided to help James after Snape blew him off. But poor James, Lily having a boyfriend? Bad luck. If only he was a nerd.. What she wants in return is surprising. But I absolutely love your story and writing so keep it up =]

Author's Response: Oh, Walt is a nerd, just not a bad looking one ^__^ I'm so glad you like this

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Review #8, by lily Three

4th July 2007:
you have to update soon, i love your story alot!!!

Author's Response: I have updated, and am working on another :)

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Review #9, by ellaxoxo Three

22nd June 2007:
aww . screw walt. go james!! whoo. =] loves it! cant wait for more..

Author's Response: haha, aw but I like Walt ^_^

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Review #10, by siriuslypadfoot62442 Three

21st June 2007:
Aww wow. you write brilliantly. I wish I could click the next button and read more chapters b/c this story is lovely! I'll be looking for many more updates :]]]

Author's Response: Thank you, you're very kind :) I'll try and have an update in September, lousy exams are taking up all my time.

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Review #11, by Helovesmenot18 Three

21st June 2007:
hahaha! I love how james tries to flirt with lily right away! Update soon this is an awesome story!

Author's Response: The updates are few and far between, I'm afraid, but there will be another soon!

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Review #12, by Romina Stephanie Three

21st June 2007:
Yay, an update! I was, truth to be told, shocked when I saw you'd updated, probably because I hadn't expected it at all! So, you made my day!

This was very good - light-hearted and hilarious. I can't even begin to tell you what a great job you've done with the characters; it's rarely I see so believable portrayals. I'm very glad we got to know Lily a bit more in this chapter, and imagining her coming up with different rules for James to follow was something that wouldn't surprise me at all. Her inner struggle was shown perfectly, and I really like the way she's torn by her own, dare I say, 'prejudices' (or something similar to that) about James and the facts that he's matured a whole lot. Love it!

As for James; well, I am by this time completely in love with him. He's charming and hilarious, when he's not sulking of course. But even then I found him cute. I really can imagine him sitting there all alone, feeling sorry for himself. The brief, yet intense, moment at the end (when the silence came upon them) was so awesome! Those are some of the moments that I love! I can't wait for the coming chapters - I have a feeling it'll be very fun to read when Lily tutors James. I wonder how he'll manage not to flirt with her?

This was very sweet and I couldn't help to smile throughout it. I must mention Gwen, before I decide I'm finished reviewing. I absolutely loved the way you described her dazzling beauty. I've always thought she was blonde and tall (we were introduced to her by Slughorn in HPB, yes?) and I'm glad I was wrong. They seem to be very different, she and Lily, but still seem to be such good friends, they can overcome their differences. She also has an air of mischievousness, that I couldn't help but admire.

Lastly; I'm surprised Lily asked James to, well, reveal, some of his secrets he holds of the castle. It shows that she must trust him, at least a tiny bit and that, she indeed is interested in him (though not on the love-front... yet?!). It'll be extremely fun to follow them through these kinds of journeys throughout the castle.

All in all, a lovely chapter. I love your writing and your plot-line and I can't wait to read more. Keep it up!
- Stephanie

Author's Response: Oi, I really find myself looking forward to reading your reviews! And incidentally, thanks for the nom over on the forums!

I want to apologise for my lack of an update so far, but I'm studying for my exams at the moment so I have no time for fun stuff. I have most of the next chapter written and have taken deathly hallows into account, so that'll be fun :)

this review has made me smile so much. I'm delighted that you think it was so good. It was difficult to write - I'm having a little trouble with Lily, but hopefully I'll get there. I want to do her right!

The rules - ha! they will have a certain level of fun involved, don't worry :P

And I'm not sure about Gwen, to be honest. I don't remember if Slughorn introduced her, or if she was described, but on the hp-lexicon there was a little picture and I went with what was there. -shrug-

Thank you so much for this review. Really, I do find myself looking forward to them!


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Review #13, by thediarywithin Three

21st June 2007:
Lol, keep up the good work.

Author's Response: I intend to, once my exams are over!

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Review #14, by Romina Stephanie Two

12th June 2007:
Aw, another hilarious chapter!

Seeing James being pissed off was funny; though, I feel a bit sorry for him. No potion, no relationship with the young woman he desires and loves... Seeing her with a boy he consideres being a total nerd. Aw, I could totally feel for him.
I was not startled when he suddenly attacked Snape; I was, until that very moment, wondering when he would. Snape certainly draw the final straw, and deserved what he got. I assume it was what Snape wanted - to provoke James so badly he had a reason not to tutor him and to punish him enough to fail Potions.

I mentioned your great portrayal of James; you managed to show Snape in an equally good way. Very, very convincing. Bet he was glad he could punish James the way he did and for everything James had ever done to him. I sympathize with Snape; I do not like him, but his character is very intriguing. I'm really hoping we'll see more of him. You've pulled him off brilliantly. But I did mention that, did I not? :p

I love the way you show the relationship between the Marauders; the bond they share is so visible, I almost want to touch it (even though it's abstract.) It's just so realistic. I'm looking forward on seeing how Remus and Sirius will develop as persons, individually and together in the eyes of James. He has already seen this deeper bond, and I'm curious if he'll notice it again. I love Remus/Sirius.

Emotions and scenery are described greatly, but you still haven't overdone your story with a whole lot of descriptions. They're there, not distracting in anyway, but, as I said in my previous review, drawing me in into the story even more. It's great writing-style you've got. I really admire it.

I'm certainly looking forward on reading more - I love the plot (so far, hehe), the character portrayal, the language, the happenings (which is a part of the plot I assume) - everything. You've set up the scene perfectly. Hoping for an update soon! Great job trixy!

Author's Response: Another lovely review! Seriously, a girl could get used to this sort of treatment!

It was sort of in the back of my mind that Snape would goad James into ruining it all for himself. Snape is sneaky like that; he just sets a person up, but lets them undo themselves. I'll be writing a bit more of him, though admittedly he will be in the background quite a bit - this is a Lily/James story, after all, so everyone else is secondary.

That said, there will be some Sirius/Remus developments, but not for quite some time. I think they still don't know what to think of one another just yet, and it's a bit more fragile than your average relationship, so it'll take some doing.

And yeah, bless, Walt is a complete nerd. Wait until I bring out the Star Wars stuff, he and Lily are going to be so nerdy it hurts. I think, in a few fics, Lily has had a boyfriend, but I didn't want to give her a typical sort of relationship where the guy is easy to hate - Walt, in fact, is a lovely person. I want people to want to hate him, but be incapable. bwahaha, I'm evil =]

thanks again for the lovely review, I'm so happy to get them.


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Review #15, by Romina Stephanie One

12th June 2007:
I don't know where to begin. Earlier today I finished reading 'Flawed', and I'm still wondering what to write in the review. It's the same way about 'Give Me Moments'.

Well, I will begin with the character portrayal; I think you've created a very believable James, and that you've really caught the essence in his personality. Strong as a leader, yet a bit naïve and carefree. I just love to follow him throughout the chapters.

It's the same with the rest of the Marauders; I will dig a little deeper when it comes to Remus and Sirius when reviewing 'Flawed', which means we have Peter left. As you may know, many decide not to include him in their Marauder stories. It is according to me annoying and horrid, honestly. I'm glad he's here and I must say it's one of the best portrayal of his character I've seen in a while. You show us his fear, which will always be there, yet the loyalty to his 'current' friends. He turns against them in time, but now, he's so different from what he'll become. I truly love the way you characterize him; in the spotlight, right beside the rest of the Marauders. He may not be bright, but he has his other defining sides and you really manage to show us that. Good job!

Then we have Lily, a character that I personally found difficult to portray. She seems to have mixed emotions about James - not when it comes to lovefeelings, but when it comes to what to think of him - in other words, I think he confuses her. Anyway, I like her very much from what I've read. Caring and warm, yet stubborn and short-tempered (when it comes to James of course.)

And the chapter in general - aw, hilarious! The thought I had, seeing James being tutored by Severus was just... Funny, yet I couldn't help wondering if they could pull it off. Turns out it never did, since Snape loves to provoke James.

As for the language - grammar and spelling is flawless. It flows without any abrupt endings in the middle of the text and you manage to give a perfectly clear picture of what their feeling ans seeing. I love that kind of writing; you really manage to draw me in and that is amazing. You're a great author.

This is a very good - humorous and interesting - first chapter and I like the fact that it starts just where 'Flawed' stops. It's a promising start on what I believe will turn out to be an excellent story and I'm sure it'll have me glued to it in the future as well. Great job trixy - but now I'm off to review your second chapter too!

Author's Response: I think I'm going to find myself looking forward to your reviews! I love how in-depth you are, and a good review is really rare, so I do appreciate it. I'm a bit annoyed with myself as far as portraying Lily so far - it's not going as I would like it to, but she hasn't had much of a chance yet. I am a previous victim of 'Peter-is-evil' thinking, and trashed him in one of my fics, but I haven't done it since. He's important, and there has to be some really deep hurt there to make him do what he did. I'm going to try and weasel that out along the way. I'm so glad you thought it was a funny chapter, too, because I am trying pretty hard to keep this light and easy to read, since I tend to stick to sad stuff. No more!

I really am going to be looking forward to hearing from you again! thanks so much for the kind reviews.


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Review #16, by jenonymous One

12th June 2007:
"his gang of croonies." What's a croonie?

It's good stuff. I love the descriptions early on of the weather and the grounds, and I like James behind and helpless. (I'm really not a big James fan, but I am a Trixy fan, so I will be following closely!)

Author's Response: pft, excuse ME little miss dictionary XP a croonie is the trix version of a cronie ^^ thanks for reviewing, Jen.

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Review #17, by lupinlove Two

11th June 2007:
yay, i'm really glad i came back for this one! i'm really getting curious about how lily tied into that fateful night, so i hope you'll update soon!!

Author's Response: Oh, there's no need to be curious. That's all explained in my short story "Flawed". I'm just continuing Moments from that story.

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Review #18, by lupinlove One

11th June 2007:
i'm loving the beginning of this story!! your writing is pretty much impeccable, which is such a nice change with fanfiction, and which is what lured me into reading. hehe. (also, i love james/lily.) i wanted to leave a review because i really like the way you write the relationship between james and lily. it's not like ridiculously over the top, but the nuances are there, and i really like the "pitying looks" lily gives james. it's really refreshing! anyhow, i have to go but i'll definitely come back to read the second chapter.

Author's Response: Aw bless you! Thanks so much, I'm really delighted to get a good review. I am trying to make it as believable as possible. From everything we know about Lily and James, it's clear that it wasn't a case of "ZOMGIDOLOVEYOU! Whudda thunk it?!" So I'm glad you appreciate what I'm trying to do =] hopefully I'll be hearing from you again!

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Review #19, by DeathCabForCutie One

10th June 2007:
cute

Author's Response: ... thanks?

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Review #20, by Musicbox Two

10th June 2007:
Another excellent chapter. I'm actually glad to hear that this story is going to be a slow mover. I much prefer the long, drawn out, tension filled, believable Lily/James romance than one where the dramatically and instantaneously changed pair fall in love by Chapter 3.
Anyway, I apologize for digressing. I really enjoyed your portrayal of Snape, and while I do think James was a bit of a prick to him, vanishing the potion was just evil.

I can't wait to read what comes next!

Author's Response: James was a total berk, but he wasn't about to start being nice to Snape for the hell of it! XD I was a bit disappointed in my Snape to be honest. The chapter wasn't everything I wanted it to be, but it's good enough I suppose. Thank you for your lovely compliments, I'm so glad you're still with me!

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Review #21, by ellaxoxo Two

10th June 2007:
go remus! =] aww. i wish i could guilt people into doing things but that is one thing i such at. it was a great chapter and i cant wait for more. until the next review.

Author's Response: Haha, guilt trips are the best, and Remus pwns because he's got that whole "I'm a tortured soul" thing rockin' for him! Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #22, by AussieAnatomy627 One

10th June 2007:
i loved it!
~Aly

Author's Response: Glad to hear it =]

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Review #23, by Musicbox One

4th June 2007:
This story seems equally as wonderful of your others-- I especially loved the genius comparison of May to adolesence. I'll definitely be following this story in the future ^__^

Author's Response: Thank you, that's so nice of you! I'm a bit worried about this fic, because it's a slow mover, but please do stick with it!

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Review #24, by ellaxoxo One

4th June 2007:
=] your review box looked a little hungry! it's cute and i'm looking forward to more. until next time!

Author's Response: haha, it certainly was hungry! thank you for feeding it! there's another chapter posted now, so hopefully you'll keep with me =]

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