Good, but very hard to read because of all the grammar/spelling mistakes. In the summary, there are quite a few typos - I think you meant "shine" instead of "shin" and "first" instead of "frist" along with some other things. If you edited the summary, it might attract more readers. Also, editing the story might be a good idea, too. It might be useful to have a beta to help you out with things like that. You have a good concept, though. :) Report Review
navigation
home
search HPFF read stories write stories login/register get help site links forums podcasts Terms of Service Site Rules contact us
categories & genres
Genre: - crossover - drama - fluff - general - horror/dark - humor - mystery - romance - action/adventure - angst - au - young adult
Popular Pairings: - harry/ginny - ron/hermione - james/lily - draco/hermione - more...
Format: - one-shot - short story - novella - novel - short story collection - songfic
quick links
my account ToS random story site rules help merchandise
fanfictionworld.net
