good, sorry that you killed off Hermione.

 Report Review

bloody brilliant i neverr normaly rea harry/luna fics but do the sequal keep me informed

 Report Review

Taht was really good and you should so make a sequal!!! I wonder why they didnt put harry and luna together cause they make a much better couple than what happens in the book. 9/10

Author's Response: Yeah, they do make a good couple, don't they?

Ah well, thanks for the review Missy.
Elven

 Report Review

I love this story.
You did a great job of describing how everyone fought in the final battle


Author's Response: Thanks a lot.
Elven

 Report Review

tis a good story make the sequel!
=]

Author's Response: Thanks!

 Report Review

Hey, just wanted to let you know that I have posted the sequel to My Father is My Savior, if your interested.

By the way, I read your one-shot. It was a really cute idea for a story! ^^
~Alex

Author's Response: I'm very interested. I'll check it out soon

Thanks for the review,
Elven

 Report Review

didnt like it, too short and i dont like relationships that spring out of mid air. also alot of grammar mistakes

Author's Response: Heard it was too short, I'll need to update.
This ship however doesn't springs out of mid air.
There are lots of reasons why this ship could be believable.
My grammar, I know, will need another update.

Elven

 Report Review

uuughhh to quickly told

Author's Response: Still need to update this once more.
Heard there some mistakes.
Think whatever you want.

Elven

 Report Review

Cute!

Author's Response: Thanks!!!
Elven

 Report Review

omg !! I love this story ! You should so make a sequel !

Author's Response: Thank you for the review,
Elven

 Report Review

Personally, I thought the whole thing was a bit rushed. It was a bit strange, and Harry was quite out of character. The grammar really took away from the story, which could have been more engaging had I not spent half the time thinking about your spelling mistakes. Sorry, but I just thought the grammar kind of deprived from the story. A nice idea though :)

Author's Response: Thank you for the review.
I honestly thought I had gotten a beta on this.
Well, seems I'll just have to find one.

Elven

 Report Review

yes do iT it was good happy and sad

Author's Response: Lol, thanks a lot.

Elven

 Report Review

Aww, I really liked this story. I like the idea of Harry & Luna they seem to have a connection in the books and I think they'd be sweet together.

Author's Response: Yes, I too like the idea of Harry and Luna because they do have a connection in some kind of weird way and it's what makes them pairable (even a word?) to me.
And I'm glad they made the connection between them shown in the movie OOTP.

Elven

 Report Review

I just loved it!
it was so cute.

Author's Response: Thanks for the lovely review Bonniié.

Elven

 Report Review

I'm going to start with the small things I noticed as I went through the fic. These are relatively minor and easy to fix, but if you have any questions you know where to find me! No matter how good your subject matter is, a story can be ruined by weak sentences. One of the early ones caught my eye: "It had been a long time since his fight..." I recently learned the evils of the word 'it' and vague phrases like 'long time.' How much time has passed since that battle? Months? Years? Decades? This sentence would read better as "Years had passed since his fight with Voldemort."

You have some interesting sentence/paragraph spacing here. I'd recommend asking a beta to look over the piece to help you find a more natural spacing method.

Awww, Harry hates animals! He tolerated Scabbers and Crookshanks, so why the sudden change? I don't think that you would hate someone's cat if it was predeceased by its beloved owner. You might want to make Harry be less angry towards the innocent. Flaws in a hero are good; streaks of evil that run contrary to the will of your audience aren't. "Why did he hated those animals again?" would read better as "Why did he hate those animals?" In the sentence "Hermione Granger, smartest with..." "with" should be replaced with "witch." I like how you wrote the flashback, but one sentence confused me: "Tonks and Remus were fighting while watching each others back." Were they literally staring at each others' backs (a physiological impossibility that I'll ignore for now)? Perhaps they were fighting back to back. Also, you say that Draco had joined the good side and was fighting his father. As nice as this might be, it isn't the point of your story. The reader doesn't need to know. Azkaban is spelled with a 'k', not a 'c.' There are more grammatical mistakes here than I ought to point out. You can find a good beta through the HPFF.com forums.

Minerva McGonagall is the Transfiguration professor at Hogwarts, not the 'transformations-teacher.' I liked the line "Harry asked, wanting to know why Luna would buy such a painful memory." It's so Harry! He always did take things personally, not seeing how they would affect others.

Now, on to my major objections. Luna is NOT in character. I like the character you have, I really do, but she would be better as an OC. Also, Harry is NOT in character. He isn't really that impulsive and I could never see him asking a girl to marry him -- a girl that he's never exchanged ten sentences with and certainly doesn't know any more. I'm surprised that he even suggested working together to get over their pain -- judging from earlier in your story, he's been avoiding attachment ever since Hermione died. I know how long it takes to write something like this and how hard it is to hear that it doesn't work, so please remember that this is just my opinion.

Author's Response: Okay.
Heh, I've heard Luna is in character and Harry is too.
You seem to think they are not.
It's funny to see how opinions can be so different.

Thanks for your help however,

Elven

 Report Review

honestly, I haven't been into Harry/Luna ship, but this story was sad, in a good way. It showed good emotion, but I think the thing with harry proposing to Luna was kinda odd. I didn't like it much. But I did love how they could connect with each other.

Author's Response: Thanks!!!

Elven

 Report Review

It was a very cute story. I like how Harry and Luna could relate to each other's grief, and I feel bad for Harry having to watch one of his best friends die. I like how you made him so affected by her death without him having to be romantically involved with her. Anyway, I'm not usually a Harry/Luna shipper (big on Harry/Ginny) but I liked this. I'm still not sure that Harry would make such a huge decision right then and there. He hadn't even been dating Luna and then he decided to marry her? I think he probably should have gone out with her a little first, because that's a big deal. Also, why did Harry assume Luna and Ron were going out? All in all, though, I really enjoyed this fluffy story!

Author's Response: Thanks,
Yes, well I made that marriage deal for the fluff really.
Well as Hermione is dead and I don't like Lavender the next choice is Luna.
lol
Thanks for the review,
Elven

 Report Review

Hey, it's mischiefmanaged from the forums here to review your story. This was a great one-shot. There were some grammar and punctuation problems, but it was not distracting. It's great how the little kitten is the whole center of the story. Good job.

Author's Response: Thanks!!!

Elven

 Report Review

Yes, I would like a sequel.

Um, first things first. Yes, I'm talking, of course, about the cc. There are more spelling and grammar mistakes in this fic than there has been in the other ones. Perhaps you should read over it again, or have someone else read over it.

I enjoyed this one much more than I enjoyed the previous one, My Unreal World. There was a lot of thinking, many flashbacks and much action in this one, plus it was bittersweet and not just all sad. The flashbacks were perhaps a bit more describing than telling, I would like it to be more actionfilled rather than... you know, more like a video instead of a picture. Wow, I'm good at metaphores, he he :)

I really liked that you explained why teenagers could beat the DEs. Many don't even question that, but I'm glad you did and I'm glad you added it to your story.

Another thing I liked was how Luna told min that more people had died than just Hermione (I can't believe you killed George and not Fred, by the way, but that's a different story entirely :p ). It seemed awfully Harry-ish to be so caught up in one thing that he forgot or overlooked everything else.

While I'm talking about Harry, let me just add that I thought he was very much in character. At least until right before the marriage-proposal. I mean, that might also be in character for Harry when I'd that old, but I don't know that now :) What I do know is that I've read a story before where one character asked another character to marry him entirely out of the blue, and it was a bit weird. This seemed more appropriate, though. They shared the same memories from the Last Battle, shared sorrows and scars. They'd heal each other, together. It's incredibly sweet!

Have I mentioned that I like Harry/Luna? I probably haven't. Well, I do. In fanon, at least. They're very cute together. That's also one reason why I liked this fic so much.

My dad is playing really loud music, so I had to escape because of a heavy head-ache and I'm now hiding out on the trampoline. So that's one reason why I won't write a longer review than this. So... sorry!

Oh yeah, I almost always forget. Length. I like to say something about it whether it's good or bad. This time it's good, so... that's good.

Anyway, I see you're writing a novel-length fic. Good luck with that!

Christina

PS: You should check the correct spelling of the word "Azcaban"!

Author's Response: Thanks!!!!
I'm starting to get quite attached to your reviews!!!
They are so long and even you give some cronstructive comments about it you always make me smile when reading your reviews.

Ugh, didn't I changed that already?!
I know, it's Azkaban.
lol,

Hugs,
Elven

 Report Review

This is a good chapter. The descripitions are good and I like it. I hope you do come out with a sequel.

Author's Response: Thanks.
Elven

 Report Review

It's Carrie from the Got Fanfic? team again.

To be honest, I have never read a Harry/Luna fic before, so I'll do this to my best knowledge. I thought that the plot was very good. It started out nicely, but your grammatical mistakes outweighed it, I'm sorry to say. Grammatical errors take away from the story. Also, I think that it was a bit quick. I don't think that Harry would just propose right after finding out about all of those deaths.

I hope that I was able to help you,
Carrie

Author's Response: Okay.
Yes, I heard it's a bit rushed.
And about the grammar mistakes.
Thanks,

Elven

 Report Review

aw. this aws really sweet. at first i thought Harry and Hermione were 2gether. but then realised they were not. this was really gd. well dun

Author's Response: Thanks!!!
Elven

 Report Review

aw, thatz really sweet!!!
u've really really! got to make a sequal!!! i know everyone would enjoy it!
great story! :)
10/10
~M~

Author's Response: Oh thank you so much!!!
I'm working on a sequel.

Elven

 Report Review

Very cute, I loved the whole idea of it. I don't normally read Harry/Luna, but this one really caught my attention. I'm a kitten person ;) you have some minor mistakes here and there, but nothing to worry about, just spell check it again.

There are some places with huge spacing, if you want to split the chapter into parts, then just use the line tool in the advanced editor or the tag in the simple one.

You characterized Luna very well, so major kudos to you for that, I know it's a very hard thing to do with her.

Overall I'd say an 8 or 9 out of 10

cheers,
Magic

Author's Response: Thanks Magic for the review.
Thanks about Luna, but I find it kind of easy to write her.


 Report Review

Well done! You should totally make a sequel!

Emma xx

Author's Response: Thanks!!!

Elven

 Report Review