HURRY! HURRY! HURRY! HURRY! HURRY! HURRY! HURRY! HURRY!
Write more! I'm freaking out here! Report Review
Woah! Having Lily and Alice cat fight is ... a bit too much for me. It just makes me want to say ... MEN!~!Author's Response: It is a bit dramatic, but that's the style I was going for when I wrote it...at least I think it was, it was so long ago! :)
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OMG ... those last sentences Alice said is scary!! What's she going to do?
And this is very interesting ... Lily is obviously besotted with Frank ... and Frank is now interested in Alice ... Complicated triangle!!
I like it!Author's Response: Yes, this was done for an old challenge about love squares, so I tried to make it as terrible as possible. Thanks for reviewing! (and I'm so glad you found the story again!) Report Review
I really like your story and I hope you continue it! Great chapter! 10/10 =)Author's Response: I really hope I get a chance to, because it was an interesting idea.
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I just saw that you abandonned this story, but can you pleeeaaase continue it??? i really like it, i want to know how it finishes! please? *drops on her knees*
Author's Response: Well I've just reread it and realized that it wasn't as hopeless as I thought it was. So if I get Writer's Block for my newer stories, I'll be sure to go back to this....but surely you know how it ends? :) Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
I didn't get the link :( are you sure you sent it to the right person? Its
H3RM10N3 ;)Author's Response: Yeah, that would be a problem since I sent it to mrshermioneweasley. Oops...:)
I just resent it. Sorry about the mix-up. I tend to assume things, and you know what happens when you assume... Report Review
ok, so I haven't actually read this, but I NEED to know where you got the picture of the curly haired girl (Alice?) on your banner. I totally want it. If you tell me, I will love you FOREVERAuthor's Response: Haha, I PM-ed you the link. Hope it helps! Report Review
Oh my God. *Grins* This just keep getting better and better. Can't wait 'til the next chapter! 10-10Author's Response: Hehe...Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
this was a good chapter, I would elabirate more, but I don't feel to good right know. Good story.Author's Response: Ooh, I hope you feel better. Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
I love love love it please keep writing and let me know when you update.Author's Response: Yay! I'm so glad you like it...I'll definitely let you know! Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
gotta say i've never read a story like this one. haha. the whole lily, james and frank, alice mixed up. i like itAuthor's Response: I'm so glad you like it! Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
Aw! How cute!!! : ) 10/10 LOVE the shower scene! *wink*
Love from Drue
xoxoxo Author's Response: Yay! Glad you liked it! :) Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
I absolutely love this story, but only because I know things will turn out alright, otherwise it is a GREAT but very depressing story.Author's Response: Haha. I'm sorry that such a fluffy story is depressing! :) Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
Ooooh; I love it. I really do. It's so believable. And I totally relate to Alice, this happened to me... except my boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend -.-
Anyway. It's brilliant, and if you fancy updating soon, yah?
Cathy.xxAuthor's Response: Ooh...I'm sorry! :( I think cheating is the worst thing someone can do...grrr...but luckily James and Lily aren't cheating on their significant others, so all is dandy in the world. I will try to update! Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
You've done a fantastic job.
It's so original.
It's going to be messy, thats obvious...but you've made it really natural..believable.
The Frank/Alice bit worked well..it coudl have been horrid and forced. But you worked wonders.
Excellent work! Can't wait to read more!
Author's Response: Yay! Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
I just realized you updated! So glad I checked. Anywho, I just love love triangles, and especially well-written ones. Great job as usual and keep it up! I'll be awaiting the next chapter.Author's Response: Oooooook! Actually the next chapter should be up in about a week...I'll probably be posting a new one-shot in the meanwhile, so keep an eye out! Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
[answer to your review request]
Oooh, the drama! *Grins* Ok.. I'm in love with this story. Thanks for making me read it :D Love all the conversations between the characters. It's all so believable and funny! Def. putting this to my faves. 10-10. Author's Response: Haha, I love drama! You're welcome, thank you for listening to me when I asked you to read it! Report Review
Ha! My favorite part was when they were describing Lily back and forth - totally cute! And this quote is amazing, "Oh, my dearest Lilyflower..." :D
And, oh so dramatic at the end! You totally pulled this little "soap opera" off. I love this - going in my favorites. Please update soon!Author's Response: Ooh...favorites....I feel special! Haha. Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
I could only find one tiny error: Right after here you're missing quotes - Merlin knows I don’t.
VERY nice story so far - I'm a total fan of your writing. You capture feelings perfectly, and this plot kept me very entertained. Honestly, if the next few chapters will be better I can hardly wait! :)Author's Response: Ooh, good catch! Yay! You like me, you really like me! :) Thank you for reviewing! Report Review
[answer to your review request]
I love your "soap opera drama". It's really good! I like how it's starting out... you know, with James beeing with Alice and Frank with Lily. I also like your style of writing, you write good! The flashback was brilliant, btw! *snicker* 10-10Author's Response: I'm glad you like it! Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
I am so glad that you posted yet another chapter. I love this story. I loved the description in the beginning, that was perfect, and you really captured the reader. I really feel bad for Lily, she needs to date James, because he is a perfect guy in almost every way possible. I laughed at the part were Lily had to be nice to James. James is rather smart to be able to figure out that Lily was forced to spend the day with them. James still has feelings for Lily that is so sweet. I felt bad for Alice in the end.
Great chapter post more soon.
Author's Response: I agree that Lily needs to date James, but I don't exactly think he's perfect in every way. In this fic, Frank is more of the perfect one, while James is the heartthrob who is just incredibly human. As was shown in OotP, he was kind of a bully and, here, he showed less sensitivity towards Alice than he probably should have. I also feel bad for Alice. But don't worry, she gets her own in the next chapter...then you'll feel bad for Lily! Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
another great chapter.
extremely brilliant chapter.
cant wait for more...Author's Response: I should have another chapter up sometime next week. Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
and a greatly written chapter.
great job on the character's personalities and conversations.
cant wait to read more.
10/10Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
Great chapter! I loved the descriptions. For example, this one:
“That’s fine, babe,” he answered with a small smile. He must have seen her disconcertion at his dispassion, because he quickly pulled her into a slight hug and kissed her temple. “I’m game for anything, as long as it’s with you.” Lily couldn’t stop the faint blush that rose up into her cheeks. Frank always had that affect on her…his Irish charm and quaint manners could charm a nun.
I liked how instead of something like, "Lily blushed," you said "Lily couldn't stop the faint blush that rose into her cheeks." That was excellent and the rest of that paragraph too was very well written.
No CC for this one. I look forward to reading and reviewing more!Author's Response: Thank you! Now a faint blush is rising up into my cheeks...lol. Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
Hello! This is ciaoxbella from the forums!
I think this was a great start so far. I've never read a story including Alice and Frank at school, and this is very original, I think.
Just a few little things...
In this little paragraph:
“I know,” she reassured with a smile and small kiss on the lips.
I think it should be "I know," she reassured him with a smile and a small kiss on the lips.
"She screamed playfully, and took off. Frank continued to chase her." maybe it's just because I haven't gotten a lot of sleep lately, but I'm not sure I can see a scream being playful. I suggest maybe changing the verb. Maybe yelped? (okay, that was the best I could come up with at the moment. Sorry x)
Overall, this is a great, interesting story that's also not your typical James/Lily, I think. The characterization is also spot on. Great job!
Author's Response: Good catch on the typo! And the screamed playfully issue...maybe I'll change it to squeal. That can be playful right? Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
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