Reading Reviews for On the Way Home
  
15 Reviews Found

Review #1, by norapotter Home

8th September 2007:
*stares at the blinking curser wondering how to say what she wants to say as she realizes that she has a big smile on her face that had replaced the previous lump in her throat* I'm sorry but i really was wondering how to express how good this was. It is so hard to put it into words so i figured i would just show you instead of tell (hehehe i sound like me english teacher).
This was absulutly wonderful. I love how you described Harry's weariness. And your style is wonderful. You write with a certain type of smoothness that flows almost, i don't know how to put it into words, the closest word i can come up with is poetically but it doesn't even fit that description. As you said it is differant (well you didn't say that you said it was odd and in my mind odd means weird, weird means differant and differant means cool.) and it really was. There arn't very many pieces like this. Your style of description mixes so splendly with harry's weariness and determination to get home.
But i was a little bit disapointed about something. With your wonderful, unique, brilliant, fantastic, informative way of describing you never once mentioned how soar he would be or how cramped his feet were. and how far had he been walking? and how long had he been gone. It seems that with this wonderful piece and style and harry's desperation, i don't know i feel like that is needed.
But other than that this worked out really well. And I don't know if that would have worked, i mean, you are the author. I don't know if you thought of that and tried it and it steared the piece away from your main point or goal, or if when or if you do try it it won't work. Just a suggestion.
I am going to rate this 10/10 for its wonderful description that flowes poetically and illustrates emotion. Good work!

Author's Response: Wow! That was SUCH an amazing review. I cannot tell you how happy I am that you enjoyed it. And on the subject of showing not telling---I suppose I could say your reaction made me do the same thing. :-)

Yes, this is certainly one of my most "weird/different" stories, but I am so glad you were able to enjoy it. You got it! You really got it! Not very many people have gotten that down. And the thing about my style...oh my gosh, seriously? That is so nice to hear! :-)

The funny thing is, that since writing this in the winter, my writing has IMPROVED a LOT! So, although I haven't here, I probably would have described how his feet hurt, how long he had been walking, and more visual description in this, too. But I agree, that could work very well. I probably won't change it, because I have enough going on with my non-HPFF novel and don't really have enough time to go back and edit it, but if I ever have the urge to change something, that is going first on the list. It's a really good suggestion.

Again, thank you SO much for my review. It really made my day and I can't tell you how happy I am someone GOT it!

-Anony_Mouse, :-)


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Review #2, by jenniiiiii Home

27th June 2007:
This seems longer than it is...I liked it being short. Any longer and it would have lost its sweet little point. I don't think you should expand it.

You know, you've got a really interesting way of writing. You seem to focus on different things to most people - like in this you focus on his journey home rather than what happens when he actually gets there. In Revelation, you focus on the trio's friendship as well as Ron and Hermione's romance. It's really quite interesting, and very unique. Most authors would have gone on to describe what happens after Harry finally turns up at Ginny's door.

This is very simple but very emotional, and I really like that. Harry is sort of disbelieving, there's no strong, dramatic emotions, it's all very languid. Which is odd considering the angsty emotions! The ending seems to have more of an impact that way.

Okay, I don't have anything left to say for once, so good job and I liked this one as well! I'll check out some more of your fics soon.



Author's Response: Awww, really, you liked the length? YEA!!! I do too, as a matter of fact---just needed some time to come to that conclusion. I had a reviewer tell me they didn't like it, but hey, that's their problem, not mine, right? ;-) (I'm joking, of course...obviously I should take into consideration every suggestion, but ultimately, I doubt I will expand on this).

You really think my writing is unique? Aww, you have no idea how touched I am!!! You're right about Harry's reaction; if I were going to expand on it, that would be the one thing I would definitely do so, but then again, it would ruin the simplicity of this fic, so I have rather mixed feelings about it. =D And besides, my writing teacher said that description helps build character development, so I suppose I did that, here (I'd really have to reread it, though). But I'm glad you liked the ending--twas my favorite part!!!

JENNI, YOU ARE SOOOOO SWEET!!! *ginormous huggle glomp* That you like my writing...author of the month...YOU...all of your writing is so very unique that I'm uber pleased you were able to enjoy mine!!! Aww, you really don't have to do, but if you do: I'm going to be editing "Lost and Found" soon, so if you're really interested in reading that, tell me and I'll PM you when I'm done. Out of all my fics, "Not Just a Sidekick" is probably the most different...but then again, you're going to/have seen, Wicked soon, so "No One Mourns the Wicked" works for that!!! Still, it's all up to you, essentially ["Her Father's Gift" is mostly a bit of fluff---my first published piece of fanfic].

AGAIN, JENNI, I LOVE YOU!!! I might just have to give you some better reviews, soon. I'm aware my others weren't the greatest. ;-)

~Mara


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Review #3, by stargazer Home

14th June 2007:
That was really cute. I enjoyed reading it. I think you did a great job on the challange, I'm glad you took it up. It is rather an odd fic, but I love those. I love the last line when he finally gets to see Ginny after so long. I was hoping that nothing had happened to her or that you would have made her meet someone else, I'm glad to see that you did neighter of those. Well like I said you did a great job. I enjoyed reading. :]]

Author's Response: Oh my gosh, thank you!!! Heehee, kudos to enjoying odd fics--this is probably one of my oddest! =D Yes, one of the reason I made this a Harry/Ginny is because in my other fics, I always kill Harry, so I wanted to write a happy one for a change. Thanks SO much for enjoying and even more, inspiring--it really means a lot to me! :-)

~Anony_Mouse, :D


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Review #4, by SiriuslyCrack Home

11th June 2007:
Short but sweet. That's all I can really say, Mara. I enjoyed reading Harry's thoughts after defeating Voldemort and I liked how Ginny came into every one of them. It just shows how special she is to Harry. So far, no spelling or grammar errors. I liked the ending as well. The hero is finally home...to his family...to his beloved. What's more satisfying than that? ^.^

Author's Response: Thanks so much, Tahi!!! It's one of my "weirder" one-shots and it's unbeta'd, so it really means a lot to me that you enjoyed it. Thanks SO much for taking the time to r&r.

-Mara, :-)


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Review #5, by HermyJane Home

7th May 2007:
What?? It ends there?? Noo! I demand more! That's alright, but it did end a little abruptly. Your story was beginning to draw me in (definitely a good thing) and I couldn't wait to read on but there was nothing more. Ah well. I loved how you described what happened almost right after Harry killed Voldemort; how he was feeling and how he saw the world now.

Author's Response: I'm sorry! *cowers and hides* I suppose my point, when I wrote the story, was to convey a simple moment in time, so the G/H meeting might have ruined that, and it was also written for the "Nothing" challenge (only a limit of what I could do with that, with the site rules), so...to continue would be too much of "something"! Again, really sorry, once again. I don't think I'll be adding to it any time soon (see my bio), but I do have several other stories here that don't end quite as abruptly, if you'd like. =)

Sorry once again! I am glad you were able to enjoy it, though!

Thanks for the r&r!

-Anony_Mouse, :-)


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Review #6, by LilyEPotter Home

24th April 2007:
great chapter.

Author's Response: Thank you! It's a bit odd, so I'm glad you enjoyed it. =)

-Anony_Mouse, :-)


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Review #7, by AloneintheDark Home

3rd March 2007:
Wow, Mara, that was really beautifully written, and I don't think it is strange at all.

There is so much that could be left out in a plot like this, but I dont think you left out any detail. It was really beautifully written, especially the ending :P that was great

definitely a new favorite of mine :)

-Anjii

p.s. I got a gallery at TDA, you can check it out here: http://the-dark-arts.net/forums/index.php?showtopic=18491&st=0#entry217737

if you want to, of course, you dont have to.

10/10

Author's Response: Hey, Anjii! So glad you enjoyed it. It was an odd little fic of mine, mostly written because I realized I killed Harry in all my H/G's so far, so I'm glad you liked it. Also glad you didn't think I left out any detail-there's so much to capture in a scene like that! The ending is my favorite part too. :-)

Did you get my PM? I checked out your gallery; I shall have to comment soon, it's great! ;-) I'm starting making graphics too, but I don't have nearly as many as you, so I can't start a gallery yet. I want that Galinda avator!

Anyway, thanks a lot! PM me back so I can give you that beta-ed fic (when you have time of course).

-Mara, :-)


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Review #8, by Quibler Home

28th February 2007:
I like it! I love it's difference. The short paragraphs pack a lot of punch, a real literary tool!! This is a great story that manages to express tons of emotion in just a few lines!

Author's Response: Hey, Quibler, always a pleasure to hear from you! ;-) I'm glad you liked this fic. It is rather different, which makes it mean ten times more when people enjoy it. I've considered expanding it, but I'll probably keep it just the way it is. Thanks so much for coming back here-I ♥♥♥ your stories and reviews!

-Anony_Mouse (Mara), :-)


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Review #9, by ElissandrAnne Home

19th February 2007:
Wow, you did a great job on the emotions. Poor Harry - it's true he didn't choose his fate. But at least, he defeated Voldemort. And now, he's free to love Ginny... Right?
I'm sure that she will help him get over it and live... He's feeling defeated because he's so tired. Right? lol.
At least, the last paragraph is hopeful.
Good job!

Author's Response: Oh, really, Anne, you enjoyed it? YEA! It's so short that it's nice to find people who really take the time to leave such a nice review and enjoyed it. My shortest story, actually!

I'm glad you think I did a nice job with the emotions-I was going to go back and edit this with more emotions Harry would have had, but I thought they just really wouldn't work with the scene I was trying to convey, however realistic they happened to be (though it was a GREAT suggestion from Andrina_Black and I might just use it for something else!). Anyway, yes now he's free...I realized that in all my other H/G's I killed Harry so I thought that I needed to make him live here-besides H/G rules! :D

He is tired, you're right. I totally agree with you, though others might have a different interpretation, mine is the "happy" one-Harry and Ginny forever and together!

Thanks, Anne!

-Mara, :-)


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Review #10, by AndrinaBlack Home

12th February 2007:
This was really sweet (in the end) and emotional (or however I should describe it. Translated: I liked it!
One thing you might want to think about is the other emotions Harry might have felt. I think especially about how he felt being a killer. He might have felt almost scared of himself. Concerning this I want to refer to your other story; Not just a sidekick (sorry if I didn't remember the name correctly). In that one you explore so much of Rons emotions.
I think though that it is a good idea to concentrate on Harrys feelings about Ginny, and my suggestion might make it so much more angsty.

I really have liked your writing in the two stories I have read and another day I will read more!

Andrina

Author's Response: Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

What a good idea! That was a very, very good idea about another one of Harry's mixed feelings concerning this scene, and since I wanted to expand it, one of these days I'll try to edit it in! ;-) Thanks SO much for the suggestions-it's such a complex scene, Harry, after killing Voldemort, that there is definitely always room for improvement.

Thanks again! I hope you will enjoy my other stories again if you read them. You're a good reviewer (and by the way, you did remember the title right)!

-Anony_Mouse, :-)


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Review #11, by Trina216 Home

11th February 2007:
thanks so much for writing this for my challenge! its almost exactly what i wanted; a lot of description of feelings, surroundings, etc. and i compliment that your descriptions are well written and thought out...even though i didnt really want the plot of the story to explain the major events that take place in the books, i like the idea i understand that its pretty hard to write a story about nothing lol

good job! i look forward to reading more of your writing :-)

Author's Response: You're so welcome! Thanks for inspiring me. I probably could have made this challenge more what you had originally invisioned, if I really wanted to, but I just wanted to make sure it fit the ToS. :-)

I'm really glad you enjoyed this though! I know it was short, but...I have no ideas how to expand it! Anyway, like I said, I'm really glad you enjoyed it, and I hope you enjoy more of my other writings, if you get to them. :D

Thanks again! I really wanted to do a happy Harry/Ginny, for a change, so I'm really glad you have me the inspiration.

-Anony_Mouse, :-)


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Review #12, by GinnyWeasleyPotter Home

10th February 2007:
MARA!
I'm getting to this fic sooner than LAF, sorry about taking so long for that one...ANYWAY...

Yay, Harry/Ginny!!! *hugs both of them* I really liked how you started it out, your descriptions, everything. Though it was a bit short, it was definitely very sweet! The ending almost made me cry- “Ginny,” said Harry, and he watched as her face slowly began to relax. “Ginny-it’s okay. I’m here. I’m finally home.” I loved that, I really did...I think that you could have used just a tad more detail to make it longer, but otherwise it was really good.

I would leave a longer review, but I'm feeling really lazy right now...*hits self*

10/10

~Lau da Cow

Author's Response: LAUREN!

I'm glad you liked it; if I think of more details I will definitely consider expanding it, I'm just not sure where I would put the details in! I'm sooooo glad you enjoyed it; I find it a bit strange, to be honest, so I'm glad you enjoyed it. I really wanted to write a happy Harry/Ginny, where Harry's alive, since in my other fics, he's dead...I was thinking of you, when I wrote it, so I am very glad you enjoyed it!

Don't worry about the review length! It was fine, believe me. And thanks for r&ring, Miss Awesome La da Cow...I'm so glad you like it! *huggles*

-Mara (whose only interesting nickname is "Mar"), :-)


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Review #13, by a diffrent type of flower Home

10th February 2007:
pretty good

Author's Response: Thank you! And thanks for the r&r too.

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Review #14, by saberwolf Home

10th February 2007:
Dude I'm sorry but it was just too short.

Author's Response: I'm sorry you didn't like it, but do you have any ways to continue it? Next time, I'd love to hear how I could expand it!

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Review #15, by Fahima Home

10th February 2007:
awww...so awesome!

Author's Response: Awww...thanks for the review! I'm glad you thought it was awesome. :-)

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