im not trying to be mean here or anything cos if ur like me u try to write fluff but it always ends up like this...it moves too fast and if u slow down and try to put a little more feel into it and more details it might work better cos i have to the same thing for my self...i liked her being tonuge tied around him after she started questioning her feelings for him, it was very realistic.trust me i kno from past experience *mutters about how stupid boys are* but anyway it was good but i still think u can do better!! just trying to encourge here!!^_^
-Lyra

Author's Response: yeah, as far as fluff goes, I don't have much experience making it harder for me to add an extended amount of details. There are some parts I have more experience with, such as being utterly oblivious or becoming tongue-tied once you do know, but as far as the falling in love part, so far mine hasn't been especially fairy tale-like. This is one I know needed more improvement on so thanks for the suggestions.

 Report Review

Aw. Charlie is absolutely adorable. THE perfect boyfriend. But that Joel guy isn't very nice. Laura should break up with him for being a berk. Very cute for your first fluff/romance kinda stuff. I really don't have any criticism except maybe you can make it longer? But it is a one-shot so that doesn't really matter. Great job!

Author's Response: Thanks. I was a bit out of my realm and something I did to challange myself and test my limits. I'm glad you liked it. Thanks for the review!

 Report Review

its so cute i want charlie to be my boyfriend...i heart this story its amazing

Author's Response: thank you! Charlie is really sweet isn't it. Not really my type but definately someone I can see being particularly likable and/or popular.

 Report Review

Aw!! That was adorable and I loved it! Went perfectly with the challange. Excellent job.
Keep writing!
Love ~K (10/10 in favs)

Author's Response: Thank you. When you urge me to keep writing I hope you don't mean on this one because it's just a one-shot, sorry. If you mean overall, then no worries I will! I'm glad this made it into your favs and diserved top rating. Thank you!

 Report Review

aw theyre cute

Author's Response: Finally my first reviewer for this. THANK YOU! I'm glad you liked it. It was my first try at fluff so I hope I managed to pull it off.

 Report Review