Reading Reviews for The Truth
  
15 Reviews Found

Review #1, by That_Nerd The Truth

23rd January 2011:
Aww, this fic is so cute.

Author's Response: Thanks for the review!

AshHa


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Review #2, by Potternerd1997 The Truth

9th November 2010:
Did I already leave a review for this story? Oh well. Here's another one, 'cos I felt like giving you some constructive criticism.
I think your use of words is simply wonderful. Your grammar is close to flawless and your dialogue...fits, if you know what I mean. It just works well with your characters and your story.
You have a pretty good use of setting and characterization through that setting, which is pleasurable for the sake of imagery to the reader.
You have the same problem I usually have but am attempting to smooth out: you want your main plot to move too fast. You start in the middle of the action, giving away everything that Hermione is thinking and leaving no real suspense for the reader to uncover. You almost make it obvious how the story will turn out.
Your story is not one that could be stretched out over several chapters, and of course, that's perfectly fine. There are so many stories that are better as a one-shot or short story. Your one-shot is very typical for a first-time story or a first-shot at a character or character pairing. (Please don't take offense to that, we've all been there, I actually deleted mine.)
I think that my favorite part was when she was in the library. That's a very Hermione-ish thing for her to do, and I would expect it out of her, and from J.K. Rowling had she been writing this rather than you. Your impeccable sense of setting almost off-puts your lack for sense of timing and pace.
Ron and Hermione are pretty well in character, too, except, I think, at the beginning when Ron is quick to agree with Hermione and express his feelings. Even though he pulls back when he gets to the meat of the situation, he still puts a whole lot out there for Hermione to hear and to expose him before he gets out.
Something I noticed: there are no other smaller characters, other than Harry. He is briefly mentioned twice, which is perfectly fine, but wouldn't there have been other Gryffindors in the common room whilst Ron and Hermione are loudly quarreling over the sofa colour? It's understandable that you didn't mention anyone or anything really because you were once again trying to get to the main part of the plot, and not bother with the trimmings. Trimmings like smaller characters, brief flashbacks, ironic references, and backdrop plot is not always essential in a story, and especially not a one-shot, but I feel that it would've been nice to hear some in this.
I really hope that I'm not coming off rude, snotty, or that I'm trying to like beat up on you because I believe myself to be better than you, because I don't. This site is completely made up of us amateurish writers looking for something to do with our spare time. You have very promising skills and I'm rather excited to look at your other work. You have more favorites than I've gotten on my stories so far, for which I congratulate you.
I wish you the best of luck with your writing in the future and hope to see you go far!
Only the best,
Hailey (Potternerd1997)

Author's Response: Oh wow, I absolutely love your review! Constructive criticism is exactly what I need. Nope, I don't find you snotty or better than me- actually I like you. Anyway, you are most definitely right that I move way to fast. I actually was just thinking that myself when I was writing a James/Lily match-up. Also, you were right about it being my first Hermione/Ron match-up. I really hope to hear back from you again and I believe I will be checking out your stories to return the favor. Once again, thank you!

~Ashley~


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Review #3, by Harry and Ginny The Truth

10th January 2009:
Aww loved the last part of this chapter, I definitely thought the fight they had was funny but Ron was mean to Hermione whem he said he didn't want to see her again. Can u check the 1st chapter (improved) and tell me what do u think?^_^

10/10

Harry and Ginny

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! Well, you know Ron, he always sticks his foot in his mouth.

Checking the first chapter, huh? I believe I can manage that.

~AshHa~


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Review #4, by Ron is my hero The Truth

1st June 2008:
aw! This was so adoable and sweet and romantic and fluffy and just wonderful! Amazing job!
10/10

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it. Yay, I managed to hit all of the points I wanted to! Thanks for the review!

~Ash~


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Review #5, by GenieAmour The Truth

13th July 2007:
Awww it was so cute! totally Ron and Hermione-ish to fight over th color of the sofa!! =D 9/10

Author's Response: Thanx for the review! The color of the sofa fight just kinda came to me. I'm glad you liked it! 9/10? Thanx for the great rating, too!
~Ashley~


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Review #6, by EternalGold394 The Truth

9th June 2007:
That was really sweet, well done!

Author's Response: Glad you liked it! Thanks for the compliment! 10/10!!
~Ashley~


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Review #7, by Dolphins_R_beautiful The Truth

4th June 2007:
Very sweet! I like the part about Hermione going to the library, that seems so much like her. I like it! ;) 10/10!!
!~Ashley~!

Author's Response: Yah, going to the library is Hermione's thing! Thanx for the review Ashley! ;P
~Ashley~


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Review #8, by Lovehpforever The Truth

19th May 2007:
Aaaw, very cute! I loved it. A little short maybe but I loved it anyway. :D Ron's so sweet ^^ 10/10

Aaand I wanted to thank you for reading my story *hug*

Author's Response: Thanx for the review, and the hug! I'm glad you like it. Sorry for the shortness, but I'm not yet capable of writing long chapters; I've tried and it didn't work. You are very welcome for reading your story, I really liked it. Thanx again!
~Ashleyl~


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Review #9, by harrypottersangel The Truth

8th April 2007:
Very sweet. Might want to consider breaking up the paragraphs and such: makes it easier for the read to read.
Keep writing!
Love ~K (9/10)

Author's Response: Thanx for the review! Yes, once again, I need to keep an eye on that! Next time I will!
~Ashley~


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Review #10, by a_shooting_star The Truth

7th April 2007:
Aw, that was absolutely adorable :]] I think you had Hermione in character very well and I loved Ron in the story ;]] The way he shouted at her that he loved her made me smile.

Just a bit of advice; you could help it but putting a space between the lines ;] It just improves readability. I really liked the last line; The kiss only lasted a few seconds, but it felt like eternity to me. An eternity of bliss. -it was a lovely way to end it! Good job :D

Author's Response: Thanx for the review! I'm glad you liked the story. The ending I believe was the best part. I'll keep up with my spacing, too!
~Ashley~


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Review #11, by emerald_princess92 The Truth

2nd April 2007:
Aw...sorry i forgot to review this story. It was cute and fluffy. 10/10++

~Ashley

Author's Response: That's OK. I like the review either way!
~Ashley~


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Review #12, by ere The Truth

3rd February 2007:
add on more, when full, this could be the new black!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review!

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Review #13, by Redheads_4ever The Truth

27th January 2007:
Heehee :) Very cute, Ashley! Loved it. Great job :) -Allison

Author's Response: Thanks for the review, Allison! I'm glad you liked it, especially since it was my first.
Ashley


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Review #14, by LovelyMioneWeasley The Truth

6th January 2007:
So cute. It was soo adorable. You did a wonderful job.
My only advice...watch your spacing.
LMW

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review! I'll try to keep an eye, or two, on my spacing.
-Ashley


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Review #15, by Redheads_sis The Truth

27th December 2006:
YAY! That was GREAT! The color of the sofa... he-he. Classic Ron and Hermione right there for ya. Keep up the great work!
-Caitlin
P.S.- Merrry Christmas...And a Happy New Year! (OMG! 2007!) 10/10!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! Yah, I thought the fight over the color of the sofa was typical for them. Glad you liked it!
-Ashley
P.S.-Merry Christmas and a happy New Year to you too!!


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