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17 Reviews Found

Review #1, by siobhan_malfoy Kicking and Screaming

15th March 2008:
hi i was wondering if you could make me a banner?
if you can please email me at siobhan_malfoy@hotmail.com
thanks

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Review #2, by OvergrownEden9 Kicking and Screaming

24th February 2008:
As great as the first ^_^ Update soon, please. :) x

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Review #3, by OvergrownEden9 Formalities

24th February 2008:
I love it. Draco/Ginny is my favourite fanon ship - ever. You really characterized them well, and it's all very very believable. Amazing writing style too. 10/10 :)

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Review #4, by NikkiRadcliffe Kicking and Screaming

5th December 2007:
This story was so good.Great Job.Can I request a banner from you?

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Review #5, by secret_soul Formalities

2nd October 2007:
I finally got round to reading the whole chapter XP

Okay, firstly - the conversation between Ginny and Tom was perfect. I loved the opening paragraph about the snow and their little exchange - it really seemed to capture Ginny's character and introduce us to her now, after all that's changed for her, and her characterisation was just lovely. You could see still a resemblance to the old Ginny we know from the books, but you've really shown how the battle and growing up has changed her - I love that you've made her your own and still kept her canon, beautifully done.

Moving on - I think the pace you've kept is great, interspersing the current happenings in the story with a bit of memory to give the reader a glimpse into her life post-Hogwarts. Love the bit about the ex-boyfriend who collected stamps XD

Draco's characterisation is spot on from the moment we meet him and I love their little dialogue, especially the shag/shave bit (actually laughed aloud at this). I also really like (and this is a technical thing, which shows what a geek I really am XP) how you intersperse the dialogue with longer descriptive paragraphs. I always find that some authors hold on dialogue too long and it stops the piece from flowing as yours does so beautifully. Also - the little descriptive details you put in are fantastic especially (yes, I'm coming back to this again) the snow bit. You are clearly a very gifted writer (this I knew anyway, but it's nice to confirm).

The last line is perfect. Just... gah - it's fantastic. It sums up the chapter and their relationship and the characterisation all in one. Good job - I'm off to read chapter two.

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Review #6, by StuckonPrivetDrive Kicking and Screaming

22nd September 2007:
OMG! I love this. It was so great and I love that's it's the second chapter and they are not together yet. I love the sexual tension and the realism.

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Review #7, by GubraithianFire Kicking and Screaming

17th September 2007:
Another absolutely wonderful chapter from you, Trix. Skillfully done, indeed.

Last chapter, as most first chapters are, was indubitably expositional, showing us the resigned personal - for wont of a better word - relationship between the two main characters. This chapter was more professional, a little more polished, a little more frosty - all of which is more suitable for this reality-centered section. And when I say reality, I mean... I can't explain it properly, but it just centers more on daily life, on the pressures of the every day world - do you know what I mean? At any rate, you once again started the chapter with would-be innocent banter, this time between Kingsley and Ginny. You always mention in the beginning how Ginny yearns for excitement as a change from the monotony of her adult world. I really loved how you portrayed Kingsley, how he doesn't favor her just because of previous familiarity, how he insists on getting the job done. And, again, you use a fixed staple of life to bring about another topic: in this case, you chose coffee, certainly appropriate, considering the workplace setting in the beginning of the chapter. Very well done there, I really loved the coffee talk. (I happen to agree with Ginny - I wholeheartedly prefer tea.)

The middle section delves deeper into what disarray Draco's life has been thrown into; I would love to see that contrast with Ginny's real personal life. Every detail was very well thought out, and my personal favorite was how paint chips fall off the door whenever Ginny knocks. It was very insightful, very personal, and I loved how even in the midst of his parole officer, Draco refuses to change. You've painted him as a very stubborn, nearly to the point of laziness. I really, really loved that. There were two parts I particularly liked: Ginny lying to him, and Ginny putting Draco in a curse resembling the Imperius Curse. What makes both parts all the better is that she feels a little vindictive towards her childhood bully but still feels a little pity, if you could call it that. I just makes her feel so much more complex, and I loved seeing that.

I also wanted to talk about the inclusion, or the absence, of Lucius and Narcissa. What I found most intriguing was the detail that Andromeda and Narcissa have reconciled. Ordinarily, I would think this improbable, but the way you have portrayed this world makes it completely believable, and I commend you for that. And, on a related note, the way Draco is denied all but the most mediocre of his rightful belongings shows, again, the flaws in this society. What is also thought-provoking is that he almost pleads with Ginny on not working at a meager bookshop. I'd love to see this concept elaborated in the future, but the way you wrote the scene makes me think you shall.

The same goes for what you did during the interview. I just really, really loved that section. The exchange - or lack thereof - between Pennifold and Draco was very well done. I can't explain what it is that makes it so astonishing, but it feels, again, so well-characterized, so real. Absolutely delightful. And that last image, Draco leaving Ginny in the street, was absolutely unforgettable. I love that sort of thing, and you handled it with such nonchalance and yet so much weight, becuase it is at this point that we see, coupled with the last part in the first chapter, how much each of them is infuriated by the other, and from this I see even more tension. I'm so excited to see how exactly you write the future chapters, simply because of how great you've done with these! ;) You're doing splendidly, my friend, and I will definitely be looking forward to seeing more of where this is going!

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Review #8, by square Kicking and Screaming

17th September 2007:
GAH, why must it end there?! GAH.

GAH.

It was perfect! You write both Draco and Ginny unbelievably, and I love the role reversals, it was fabulous. And teh half-nekkid Malfoy was definitely not a disappointment. :oP I'm going to continually stalk you and this story, just so you know. ILY.

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Review #9, by GubraithianFire Formalities

17th September 2007:
Trix. How long has it been since we've last been in contact? Too long, I'd say. I've been debating reading this intriguing-looking piece for a long time, and now that you have updated, I really couldn't resist.

And I'm so glad I finally have checked this out. Really. Everything was delightful, absolute wonderful. First, I have to gawk over Ginny' conversation with Tom. I don't think anyone else has specifically pointed this out, but it was a really good, seemingly slightly detached opening. It was personal enough to delve into the fabric of the world as it has become, but impartial enough for the audience to look on curiously, waiting to be beckoned deeper into the enchanting narrative. The comment about snow was, I think, like the What color is ice line in Flawed. You use an element of life, one used often in metaphor, and you still manage to twist it into something new, and translate it into something else, something infinitely more profound. I loved this part, and as I said, was a great opening.

Going into the Draco interaction - as others have said, it is very difficult to keep Draco in character when dealing with a romance between him and someone like Hermione or Luna or of course Ginny. However, I think it is much, much harder to keep him believable in a friendship, and especially so in one that you have masterfully illustrated, just in this chapter. From his reluctance to answer the door, to the shag/shave comment (which admittedly is another favorite line in this chapter) to the niceties they exchange after this dialogue, you've captured what a relationship that Ginny and Draco have developed ought to be, considering the context, as well. Absolutely astounding.

All that said, my absolute favorite part was the last two paragraphs. Phrases like "... his eyes a pool of boredom" add to the descriptive element you have done so well establishing in your writing. And his action in that last section was a very controlled burst of anger, something seemingly random but I am guessing hints at difficulties to come. Perfectly Draco Malfoy, if anything was. And that last line was perfect. Perfect. Concise, and gets the point across without fluff, it is very rough, and - I can't say this enough - so like the Draco you have so skillfully portrayed.

I can't praise you enough on this thoroughly wonderful first chapter, and I am impossibly happy at having another chapter to see more of where this story is going - and oh, the places it'll go!

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Review #10, by sabs Formalities

13th August 2007:
i love this so far, your an amazing writer, I cant wait to read more!!!

Author's Response: thanks! I'm working on a second chapter ;)

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Review #11, by gaby Formalities

25th June 2007:
Please write the next chapter!!!

Author's Response: it's being worked on, I promise

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Review #12, by siriushpfan Formalities

5th April 2007:
you've accomplished a weighty task, keeping draco in character. i'm impressed with the first chapter and am anxious to read more, you certainly have a flair for creative writing. kudos.

Author's Response: Aw wow, thank you! I am actually worried about keeping them in character, yet having something happen in the future... but it's taking me a long time to update, so at least I'm putting thought into it! thanks for reviewing!

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Review #13, by andharrywokeup Formalities

9th December 2006:
The relationship you have created between the two characters is so fantastic. It is such a realsitic way of what would be a very uncanon ship. It's nice to see a Draco who is so lost that he really doesn't hold much pride anymore, the way you had him talk of his father's fortune really worked with your chapter title. I especially likd the shag/shave interaction. You also have an excellent balance between dialogue and description. Very well done. 10/10. As always, Trixy, you work leaves me addicted. :)

Author's Response: aw sweetie ^^ that means so much to me, thank you. I was very wary when I wrote this, and the longer I think about it, the more convinced I am that I have a good idea... but I don't want to rush it, and if I did it now, it would be rushed. No time, stupid exams looming. thanks for reviewing!

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Review #14, by squaredancer Formalities

15th October 2006:
ZOMG. :o I've known you could write ever since... well, the first time I read your writing, but in a draco/ginny context?? It's brilliant!! Easily one of the best I've read, and it's just the first chapter. The description was amazing, and your characterisation of Ginny is just the way I like her. She was spunky and original. Your back story, also, is fabulous. Not only entirely believeable, but it makes a lot of sense. I loved the touch about Draco never cleaning his house, or never buying her favourite biscuits. ^_^ That's such a Draco thing to do.


Anyway, fabulous job, hon! I really do love this fic already. I've put it on my favourites, and I expect an update soon. :P I'm going to bug you forever now. Loff you long time!

Author's Response: Me loff joo long time too ^_^ Thanks for reviewing sez! Coming from an avid D/G fan, it really means so much that you think it's believable. I'm working on the next chapter, am about 1000 words in, but it needs a lot of work yet. Still, I'm having fun doing it! Yay :)

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Review #15, by i_follow_bliss Formalities

10th October 2006:
This will be the first D/G story I read. I'm usually into the D/HR...but we'll see! ;)

I look forward to hearing some witty banter between Ginny and Draco. Loved the shag/shave comment! Very Draco. Hmm, Ginny as a parole officer? Very interesting...will we be hearing about any other former classmates who she, um paroles? (is that a word??) Will Pansy pop up at all? Oooh I'm so excited about all the possibilities! I look forward to reading more!

Oh, you really caught my eye with the utopia bit...will you go in more detail about that in the future?

Okay, that's it, I'm shutting up!


Author's Response: I haven't thought too much about characters that Ginny has paroled, but there will be plenty of her colleagues in the book, as well as some old friends of Draco's. The society will be explained a lot more, some cracks around the edges will be exposed... I'm really enjoying writing it, even though it's taking me a while to do! Thanks so much for the review :)

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Review #16, by Bittersweet Ending Formalities

9th October 2006:
Can't wait until the next chapter! Being an H/G shipper, it irks me not to see them together, but I love the realistic way Draco and Ginny have this awkward-- can I call it... friendship? Anywho, great read!

Author's Response: Thank you! I know, I like Harry and Ginny together too, but I'm trying something different here. It's quite a challenge :) thanks so much for reviewing!

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Review #17, by nomikkin Formalities

9th October 2006:
So like I said before, I like this. It's a very nice beginning; it sets up the story very nicely. My favorite part had to have been this:


“When was the last time you had a good shag?”


“Draco! When was the last time you shaved?”


“Oh, it’s been that long? Ouch.”


Looooooooooff jooooooooooo!!!!!!!

Author's Response: Heh, thank you nomidear :) I liked that part too, and I plan for a few more arguments like it! Loff joo!!!

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