I'm crying. I don't know what to say, this is just.. so sad.. (but well written, you've done a good job) Report Review
Ohhh... I entered this challenge too. I really like the way you wrote it. It was well set out and really sad. Well done. Report Review
This is the saddest story I have ever read. I'm so touched I'm in tears!
Mrs. Weasley is completely in character. It was SO sweet how she had flashbacks of Ronnie giving her dandelions and Ginny saying she'd stay young just for her. So much love there, and then the Forever young bit... It was perfect.
10/10, and it's going in my favs.Author's Response: I'm so glad you were touched. :)
Thank you. Report Review
Oh how sad was that. Poor Molly :( I'm going to go eat a PB&J sandwhich now :( Poor Molly...Author's Response: Thanks for the review!
I hope you enjoyed the sandwich. Report Review
oh my god. this was amazing. seriously. i thought it was gonna be cheezy when i first read the summary. most of them like this are. but this literally has me in tears. two thumbs way way up.Author's Response: I'm glad it wasn't cheesy. :P Thank you for the lovely review! Report Review
Quite a powerful piece. You certiainly touch the reader. I don't even have any critques, because it was basically perfect. I especially liked that you had Charlie come in at the end; it shows that she does still have children who love her. Poor Ginny and Ron. :(Author's Response: Molly does still have children who love her, but there's going to be two empty spots in her heart where Ginny and Ron used to belong. Thank you for the review. :] Report Review
Beautiful! not too wordy but not too blunt...just the way it should be. you captured the moment wonderfully. Molly cries, as expected, but even that isn't prolonged. I loved the metaphor with the clock-it worked perfectly. Excellent work!Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it. :] Thank you for the review. Report Review
Oh my gosh, that was so sad. You did a wonderful job with the emotions and back story. Amazing. My eyes were brimming with tears. Absolutly amazing.
*Eli*Author's Response: Thank you. :) Report Review
That was so touching, I'm crying. That was the best Angst I've read before, basically because it mentions the happy times, and then saying what had happened. I was crying when it mentioned Harry turning up, I couldn't wish for a better story really! Excellent work!Author's Response: Thank you so much! I think when someone dies, you remember all the good times and then your sense of loss is magnified and everything becomes more painful. Eh... Idk if I'm making sense. But thank you again for the review! Report Review
Am crying right now. Beautiful, heartbreaking, but beautiful. Author's Response: Thank you! :] Report Review
It's amazing when people can make the reader's heart stop because something in the story has touched them. It truely is an amazing gift.
I'm unashamed for telling you that you made my heart stop, you made it stop and you made it swell with sadness. Cor, I even started to cry when I started to read about the young years of Ron!
Amazing story, I love it.
- Yasery.Author's Response: Aww! I'm sorry you cried, but I'm also glad that I was able to touch you in some way. Thank you for the lovely review. :] Report Review
Twice she had watched helplessly as golden hands magically disappeared into the awaiting arms of Death and Time. The clock was so familiar, yet so condemned. Everything was just ticking away. How many more hands would she have to see disappear? And only seven hands were left. No mother should have to bury her children. Never.
Amazing lines...so powerful in its truth...
Ok, I always like to make comments as I go along the story, but I was completely gripped til the end. Wow. That was an amazingly sad story. You could really feel Molly's grief...and it was just so real...I mean, there's hardly any mention of wizards or magic...it's just raw, human emotions you've got here, and it's extremely well-written. Awesome job.
Author's Response: Thank you so much. I'm really really flattered. :] Report Review
Aww. That was wonderful. Simply wonderful. (Not in the sense that Molly losing her children is 'wonderful' xD). You have excellent grammar, and I love your writing style =] Brilliant job!Author's Response: Thank you so much! :] Report Review
I loved it! It literally made my heart ache. I would have liked for it to have a bit more description as it probably would have added more weight and emotion. The simplistic language was a smart move. It was overall a good story with a solid plot. My only real complaint is that more description would have added weight and emotion. But otherwise, great job!
~MistyAuthor's Response: Hmm.. I suppose I couldn't really find spots to really really describe, but I'm glad you liked it. Thank you for the review! Report Review
Oh my gosh, I tried so hard to fight the tears, and it was a losing battle. The memories you've made Molly relive were wonderful, and so fitting. Having happy memories of her children makes this piece even more powerful. You've captured her grief very well, her desperation of losing her children.
This One Shot is truly heartbreaking, very well written and deserves nothing but a 10/10.
~Mon *hug*Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review! I was thinking about a band director who passed away last year when I wrote this. :] Report Review
Oh my goodness! That was so sad, but so beautifully written! It made me tear up! Great job!
1000/10! :DAuthor's Response: I'm glad you liked it so much! Thanks for the review. :] Report Review
Very sad, and very moving. No matter how many children you have, losing one (or two!) is painful experience. I see nothing to CC here, my dear. Beautifully written. juls (mother of one.)
**Molly stood by the doorway and took one final glance around the room. The stars on the ceiling still did not twinkle. And with that, Molly closed the door with a final goodbye.** Stands out to me.Author's Response: Thank you so much! :] Report Review
omg!!! that was sooo sad. Poor Molly. I simply loved your story.
10/10Author's Response: Thank you! Report Review
So sad- I'm near tears!Author's Response: Thank you for the review! Report Review
This was a beautiful and sad story. Amazing work! I loved both flashbacks, they were so sweet. The part that really got to me was how Ginny said she'd stay young forever and then in dying young, she reamined forever young. That gave me chills, seriously. Awesome job.Author's Response: Thank you! The forever young part is one of my favorite parts as well. Thanks again for the review! Report Review
This. Was. Beautiful.
So many lines jumped out at me while reading this (it's HPromanticxxx, the one who started this challenge) and I love it.
Twice she had watched helplessly as golden hands magically disappeared into the awaiting arms of Death and Time.
I like that idea about the clock. That when you die, the hands just disappear like dust blowing in the wind.
"I'm sowwie, Mummy," he said with an innocent smile, wiggling out of her arms.
Such innocence...I like how you wrote about him wiggling. Sounds just like a little kid who loves you but wants to go out and explore the world, not be in his mother's arms. Kind of like a foreshadowing that Ron will grow up and have adventures without his mother.
The little girl crawled out from under her covers, and hugged her mother. "Don't worry, Mum. I’d never leave you behind. I'll stay young forever just for you!"
And Ginny had died young.
Oh my god. That scene...wow. Tears sprang to my eyes when I read those lines. So powerfully written, I can hardly express myself.
And I like what you wrote about the stars, that without the person who lives in the room, they no longer shine as brightly. Again, another powerful statement hidden amongst a mass of words.
And with that, Molly closed the door with a final goodbye.
I'm not sure what to say about the line, except...I adore it. Just the idea of Molly glancing around the room and closing the door as a way of silently saying goodbye to her two youngest children.
You did a GREAT job. I loved it, so much.
On my favorites, along with all your other stories.
QuidditchSeeker aka HPromanticxxx
P.S. Chapter Three of If You Take Time to Look is up!Author's Response: Thank you so much! I loved the challenge, so thank you! Report Review
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