*like i've said, you write great stories!* PS about the comment on the trouble with Santa story: just leave another review on another story if you have any advice Report Review
awww this is a great start to a story!!! i can't wait to read more if you post it!!!Author's Response: Thanks, hun! Maybe some day when I'm really bored, I'll write more! That's why I didn't just delete it! Thanks! Report Review
hurry and get to typing this was realy sweetAuthor's Response: I really don't know when/if this will get updated, but I'll try. Report Review
It's a good story at the moment. You could try to catch more people's attention by grasping hard how Hermione feels. GenAuthor's Response: :) Thanks! Report Review
Well helloo there Kenzie, it's Jen (curtaincall). I Author's Response: Hi! It looks like the little box cut you off. That's sad. :( Report Review
hey waz up i really lovr=ed it it was very sweet.hope you make more chaptersAuthor's Response: Thanks! Report Review
this is a really good story. you should continue to write it. please update ths storyAuthor's Response: Thanks; I'm trying. I'm running into...issues with it. Maybe over the summer (which starts June 1)? I'll try soo hard, seriously. Right now, I'm working on a writer's j submission. Thanks so much, loff! Report Review
This story was pretty good. I like the idea of it, the plot. but I felt that it was a bit too short and that the interaction was... rushed? Maybe I'll go check out this other story you mention.Author's Response: Eek. Ya. Pretty much. Report Review
first of all I am not good with constructive criticism I will tell you the good and the bad. Good: You have a strong start you let us get in the head of Hermione and Sarah. Bad: you might have a full head and get of track. (no more bad) you do have a strong start though:)Author's Response: Thank you; I hope to get chapter 2 up this month. Report Review
Oh, I really love this ... *sigh*. No hope for a new chapter???Author's Response: No, no, I wouldn't say no hope. That's why it's not abandoned yet. I like this story still, I really do. I'm just...frusterated with it right now. I've drafted chapter 2 literally five times, and they keep getting lost, or stolen, or put in the toilet (ew)... Ya. It stinks. So I kinda want this to go away right now. I hope to update this, however, it won't be a novel anymore. I have a much better "homeless child" story line. So, I hope to update, I really do! Thanks so much for the compliments!!! Report Review
Great descriptive language (though I'm not entirely sure than Starbucks is that popular in England...it's more American I think...meh...) The way you described the station and Sarah was absolutely excellent. However, the the way Sarah talked was a bit odd. I don't think street kids would be calling anyone "ma’am" in the time this is set in and I think she'd be a bit more cautious. Still, I really enjoyed it and look forward to an update. Have a nice day! :-)Author's Response: Thanks! Yes, I was aware faintly of the Starbucks mention; I wasn't sure what else to put in there. Is there a major coffee chain in Britian? Anyhow, I'm glad that you liked Sarah, and there is a bit of a reason that she talks in this way. It should be revealed soon (in theory). Thanks so much, and I'll try to update soon! However, I have a new novel-ish story that is almost a carbon copy of this, only the guardians are different, and the OC is better written, I think. Her name shall be Ana. Anyhow, thanks again! Report Review
poor sarah! draco is missing out on the trip of a lifetime and to put a small child on the streets like that unspeakably low even for HIM (no that is not a flame its a statement)Author's Response: Thanks! Report Review
Very good start that you have. One thing that you could improve on is descripitions. You probably could have put some more descirpition into what Sarah looks like and them going to Hermione's place.Author's Response: Thanks! I have quite a bit of Hermione's house in chappie 2 (which had a draft, then that draft got lost, then it had another draft, and THAT got lost, and now I'm sick of it). But don't worry. This'll got up, eventually! :) Thanks so much!!!!! Report Review
Good really.Author's Response: thank you. Report Review
Hi, good start. I wonder why she's out on the street? hmm. (An electronic staircase! Are Muggles so lazy that they can’t even walk up a flight of stairs?) haha, it takes too much energy to walk up the stairs =) I like it though, only wished it was longer, but that's just me, it's up to you to type as much or as little as you want. I think Sarah has a lot of sense for an eight year old, how long has she been on the street? Author's Response: Thaks! I'm glad you liked that line. It came from a trip to Chicago, actually (well, this whole story did, really). I'll tell you how this story was born (though you probably don't care). We were in the subway station, and my brother, whose about Sarah's age, hung back to look at magazines. Well, this lady (who looks a lot like Hermione grown up, actually) goes up to him and asks him if he's lost and refused to let him leave until we went back up the escalator and said, look, we're his dad and sister. The whole thing was an inspiration. lol. So I hope you enjoyed that little rant! Thanks sooo much; I really appreciate it! Report Review
Good start! I liked that you made Hermione an Obliviator - if they really have to do what you made her do, she's the one for the job, since she's Muggleborn! Poor little Sarah. The Malfoys are really bad people. Who is her mother? Um, right, you probably can't tell... I'll have to read. Hermione is very kind to take her home. You seem to have a good story there. Update soon. AnneAuthor's Response: I'll try to update! I'm glad that you liked Hermione's job! Thanks again!!! Report Review
I know it only the 1st chapter but i'm already in love with the story. I can't wait to see what happens. right fast!Author's Response: I'm trying! I swear!!! I'm so glad that you like it. After I'm done with my Christmas story and 2 reports for school, I'll have this, I swear!!! :) Report Review
good work && update soon xxAuthor's Response: Thanks; I'm trying. Report Review
really like it. good name too. please write some moreAuthor's Response: Thanks! I'm trying! This is one of the first I'm gonna update, because unlike BMBV and LYFU, I still like the premise. :) It's coming. Report Review
Really great idea for an ff. i ♥ it and can't wait to read more!!! please update! : D Author's Response: Thanks! I'm working on it! Report Review
Nice beginning. I'm looking forward to seeing where this story goes. :-) Brilliant job! x Hermione FanAuthor's Response: Oooo, thanks!!! I'm working on chapter 2 right now, and I'm actually liking this story again!!! Report Review
Next chapter plzAuthor's Response: Working on it, I swear!!! Report Review
Since you left a nice review on our story we thought that we should leave a review on your story and we are sure glad that we found your story. All of your stories are quickly being added to our Fav.s! You are such a great author, its nice to read orginal Draco and Hermione stories and all of your stories sound like have very interseting plots and we are going to try to review on as many as we can! Happy Writing ~Alayna & Danyel~Author's Response: Thanks! But I will warn you (and I am not afraid to reveal this) DRACO AND HERMIONE ARE NOT GETTING TOGETHER IN THIS STORY!!!! lol. It's not going to happen. So...erm...sorry. Glad to get that off my chest! Anyways. I'm really glad that you liked it. (And BTW, I thought I'd let you know that your banner is almost done.) ~*~KeNzIe~*~ Report Review
Are you going to update anytime soon its a really great story so far.Author's Response: I'm seriously trying. I know exactly what it supposed to happen in chapter 2, down to the food they're supposed to be eating, but it's been a combination of me being too busy and lazy to draft it. But now that I realize that I can not start a new novel (which I have a horrid NEED to do) until I update a few things, I'm getting this back into gear. So more is coming, I swear it.... ~*~KeNzIe~*~ Report Review
Great story! Update soon....Author's Response: Working on it. Report Review
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