Hey, i can make you a banner, just fill out everything below and email me at Flying_high_1@hotmail.com
People on banner
People to play them
Specal Pics you want
Anything else you want on itAuthor's Response: Oh that would be terrific thank you! I owe you one! Report Review
THATS IT!?!?! that is not very nice of you. please hurry.
Author's Response: Oh all right. I am just digging up inspiration right now. I should bring this doozie to a close soon. But we haven't even touched the wish yet have we? Don't worry, all in due time. Report Review
This is an awesome story I ove it please write more very soon!Author's Response: Thank you for reading and reviewing! Report Review
WHAT THATS IT!!!YOUR SO MEAN^_^ JOKES DUH!!
CAN YOU UP DATE IT IS A GREAT STORY SO PLEASE UP DATE.
ALL THE GOOD ONES ( WELL GOING TO BE GOOD ONES) GET ABANDONED SO PLEASE DONT ABANDON IT AND KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.
i am terrible at spelling so dont hold it against me. thanks!^_^Author's Response: I take longer to update. I am sure that by the next chapter, you will get your money's worth. I never abandon anything. I had a break with this story but I just realized that I take longer to update. I will make the next chapter very good and we will start to tap into the central plotline for the story. That's right! We've only been setting the stage up until this point!! Report Review
Cool last battle. Some good details. The lines of * sort of get bothersome, but other than that, it was all pretty good. I liked seeing all the different scenes of the battle. Seems crazy and chaotic. Cool spell with Harry's wand sucking up the AK curses from Voldemort. Like that Lupin was there to help. I'm not sure if I can see McGonagall leering at Voldemort, lol, but we can imagine it, heh.
Nice beginning. I'll try to come back and read some more as I have time. (o:Author's Response: Thanks a lot for reading! All that I was pretty much trying to convey you seem to have picked up on brilliantly! The leer seems out of character, but it was my first fanfic chapter ever. I wanted to 'stretch my wings' so to speak. I will try to update as fast as I can! Report Review
Very good. I LOVED it you are a great writer! keep writing so I can keep reading :) Author's Response: Thank you thank you thank you!! I will have Chapter 5 out for spring break! Report Review
cool story you should make more chaptersAuthor's Response: Thank you for reading! A new chapter should be out by spring break! Report Review
HURRY!!! i lovve it so much! u have to hurry! i added this story to my fav.
10/10!Author's Response: YEAH! I cannot tell you how long it has been since I have had a review! But definately! I will have one out for spring break! Report Review
wow! great, very dramatic makes you thing ur actually there.Author's Response: Wow, thanks. Y'know, it's great to finally get reviews for this story! I will actually have Chapter 4 (I kid you not) up shortly! Report Review
I hope you don't mind double review, while I wait for your next update. Guess what? My chapter 3 has finally updated after a long wait! Please do come to my story and tell me what do you think of it.Author's Response: of course i don't mind. i am going to try to update but i have so much work i don't think that i will have the time for a while. uncle danger is going to college! Report Review
Wow. What a fantastic story! I've just been drawn into the Harry/Hermione shipping, and did a one-shot, loved writing it so much that I am just about to write another one- longer. 'Sunset In Her Veins.' Anyway- fabbbbbbb story once again, and can't wait for chapter four!!!! :) Author's Response: Thank you for reviewing and I will be sure to check your stories out! Report Review
So far, you start off with a bang of action, and I love it as I see this story are consistent in action.
So far I'm working on my story, plotting more chapters and second chapter has been posted, ready to be update in next few days. Author's Response: I am glad that you seem to like mine as much as I like yours! Chapter 4 should be up soon but it is a doosy to write. Oh well we can only do our best right? Report Review
First of all, I gotta say that I totally agree with you with the character preferences you listed in your bio there. Harry's my fav, of course, but Sirius pulls a VERY close second. And Ginny...blah. Mrs. Weasley should have had all boys, if you ask me. I try to write Ginny fairly in my story, but I want to screw her over sometimes, I'm so evil. *grinning wickedly*
And now on to the story...
Holy crap!!! This was like, wicked intense! The battle scenes were awesome (please excuse the lame surfer lingo there), and Harry was incredible, just...wow. I'm a bit speechless, which is really saying something if you're a writer, eh? LOL 67/10, this was amazing. On to the next chapter.Author's Response: Thanks a lot. I actually just finished 'What the Heart Wants,' and I was thoroughly impressed. We definitely share some opinions of characters. Hope you like Chapter 2 even more. Thanks you again for reading and reviewing! Report Review
Nice long chapter and very well-written. I like it a lot! Keep up the great work and update soon!Author's Response: Thank you for reading and reviewing! I always look forward to your reviews! Report Review
Wow first review for this chapter! I absolutely love this fan fic!! u have to write loads more RRRREEEEEAAAAAAAALLLLYYYY RRRRRRREEEEEEEEAAAAAAALLLLYYYY fast!! Love that Sirius is alive. both the 5th and 6th books were really depresing so this is great!! H/Hr all the way, i love it!! ;)
liAuthor's Response: Thanks a lot! I am glad that you share my enthusiasm for both H/Hr and Sirius Black. The loophole in the veil was really fun to exploit and you will here much more on that in future chapters. I will try to update as soon as I can. Thanks again! Report Review
Alright, second chapter under your belt, and here I am back to give you another review.
I liked this chapter. You still change points of view a little, but it's blended in better, so it doesn't stand out as much, so good on you there. You have very good descriptions in this chapter, which I really like. The chapter does move around a lot, so I don't know . . . maybe slowing it down a tad would help. The change to Grimmauld caught me off guard, but that would be a horrible thing to happen to it, so good imagination there.
The kissing scene, I would maybe lop off part of Harry's talking. Someone saying aloud that they've fallen for the other person I think sounds odd, and feels even weirder. It would (I think) be much much better if you maybe had Harry say he felt different, and started explaining, but then Hermione interupts by kissing him.
Sirius might be alive eh? Well, that would be a wonderful thing to happen for Harry I think. I would have thought Lupin might have wanted to go as much or more than Harry, but he was right, there is alot to be rebuilt. But one thing, there wouldn't be any dementor's at Azkaban anymore, since they left and went with Voldemort.
Anyways, again, I've left a long comment. This chapter is working much better though, and I'm glad to see it. Keep it up, and it'll be interesting to see where you take this.
ps - like the penname (if I read it correctly, it's from the Simpsons, right?)Author's Response: I have a lot of fun reviewing your comments. As for the pace of the story, I don't think that will change for a while. This is the part of the story where everything builds up. When the climax of the story happens you will notice a slower pace. As for the kissing scene, I thought of actually making it as odd sounding as possible. Harry lost out on most of his childhood and he was never really one for relationships so he still has a lot to learn. I also didn't really like writing the park scene but I felt that it was necessary for things that will come later on in the story. Sirius is alive (or isn't he) well the next two or three chapters will tell the tale of the rescue. There will be dementors involved because I am playing along with the fact that the war is over and the dementors were drawn back to Azkaban to work. As for the penname I guess you are right it is from the Simpsons but when I created it I didn't even think of that really. Well thanks for reviewing and might I recommend to other readers your one-shot 'It's All in the Stars', Report Review
Love this fic, update soon!!Author's Response: Thank you! Chapter 3 should be up any time now Report Review
LOVE IT TO BLOODY HELL !!!!!!!!!!!! ADD SOON!Author's Response: Thank you! Chapter 3 is validating. Report Review
WOW!!!!!!!!Author's Response: THANKS!!! Hahaha. Report Review
Very good chapter! It`s very well-written and you discriped Harry`s feelings towards his new "freedom", now that he doesn`t have a prophecy to fulfill which on the other hand side, guarded him, very well.
There`s one thing that somehow really diverts me: You always let Harry call Remus "Lupin". I believe they know each other well and long enough that harry (and the others) can call him "Remus", don`t you think?
Keep up the great work and update soon! i wanna know if they find Sirius! but I wondered why Remus didn`t imediately agree with Harry and go and rescue his brother (not by blood but by heart)
~ Aileen :ODAuthor's Response: I always look forward to your reviews! The reason why Lupin, Sirius, and Harry have become more formal so to speak will be explained later on in the story. I am just trying to lead into that. A good catch on your part. Thank you for reading and reviewing! Report Review
Well that's a very interesting little twist, an exit to the portal. Your story is very good. I particularly like that way Voldemort died. Not too much drama, but enough to let the reader know the importance of the situation. Having Ron react the way he did was very true to character and shows that you put a great deal of thought into it. Overall I am very impressed with this story and will be looking forward to your future updates. Keep up the writing and I will keep up the reading.Author's Response: Thanks a lot. I am trying my best to build up the drama so that towards the middle/end of the story it will climax. At which point the story will get intense. I will try to update ASAP! Report Review
Not a bad start, especially for your first fanfiction. There are a few things you may want to consider though, just to help improve your story and help it flow better. I'm writing my first fanfic too, and I always love getting reviews because a lot of the time they help, so hopefully this can do that for you!
Your change point of views a lot, sometimes for just a paragraph. Stories are easier to read if you keep point of views to as few jumps as possible. For example, with Lupin and McGonagall getting ready, you could have it stay in Harry's point of view, and just have Harry notice them getting into position, and that they both knew their purpose (although what was McGongall's purpose? She didn't actually do anything in battling Voldemort).
Just a short question, at the beginning, you say it's a war that has been waging for decades, that would make Harry and the others fairly old, right? How old are they exactly?
That's about it. I think you're doing a great job though. Your writing is good, and Harry's little talk with Voldemort about love was a good part. I'm one of those people not liking the idea of Harry using an Avada Kedavra, since it tears the soul and is dark magic, but it gets it done.
Anyways, I've gone on long enough. Again, good start, congrats on starting a fanfiction, and hope to see you updating soon!Author's Response: Wow what a review! I am glad that you like it. As for the perspective, I completely agree. It was just a way for me to express the thoughts of all of the characters involved. In future chapters there will be fewer perspective changes. The war had been waging for decades but this is because it had been waging since before Harry was even born. Harry and his friends have only really been out of school for two years (making him about nineteen years old). As for the Avada Kedavra, I know that it is an Unforgivable Curse and is very Dark Magic, but I really couldn't waste time going into the research and development of another method of killing Voldemort. It would draw attention away from the main focus of the story which will develop into the power of granting one wish later in the story. Once again, one of the better reviews that I have read in a long time! Thanks a lot! Report Review
an amazing startAuthor's Response: Thanks a lot. Chapter 2 is currently validating. Report Review
wow, that was impressive. i really like it. interesting way to go about Voldemorts downfall. Keep it up! :O)Author's Response: Thanks a lot. It's reviews like yours that keep me going. I won't let you down. Chapter 2 should be up soon! Report Review
Terms of Service
categories & genres
short story collection