Reading Reviews for Not Everything Is As It Seems
  
7 Reviews Found

Review #1, by jada.caron Another Year Begins

9th May 2012:
it's just getting good

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Review #2, by maruder at heart Another Year Begins

8th July 2006:
dude its RT here and i think u need to start writing man i have wriutten like the first 4 chppies to my story and then i have a oneshot that im puttting on one the next chappie to my story is accepted and then i have the first chappie to another story written but i gotta wait forthechappie for this other storyt to be validated and then i have the first two chappies to the sequal written even though i m not even close to done the actual story i noe so weird and i dont have any idea wat i m writing either
lolz,
RT
and no im not doing band next year

Author's Response: aww y not? well i'll send u an email so read that k? hope ur summers been good. hope to see u soon. toodles.

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Review #3, by mm24 Another Year Begins

21st June 2006:
Okay good job! I liked it! But it was kinda hared to follow but still great! Question. Is Blaise Hermione's coisin? It just wasn't quite clear. But I still like your story! You must continue it! Thanx

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Review #4, by Calm before the storm Another Year Begins

12th May 2006:
Story= rushed + non-realistic + spelling + grammar + abbreviations + OOCness of character.

Rushed= Hermione would not just be all preppy and be like, "Oh, my gosh! I'm a pureblood! Yay!" I'm sure Hermione would never be like that...

Non-realistic= Hermione was supposed to meet Rory, who we don't even know and who y ou haven't explained, after she just met Dumbledore. She would be respectful, not like this.

Spelling= Mione? Supposed to be: 'Mione. Ur: Your. WOW: Wow. *Spelling is very important in a story. Bad stories are ones who have bad spelling, let me tell you. Your's is mediocre.

Grammar= 'Rory had bright blue eyes, was very fashionable. straight layered hair, and overall beautiful.' Should be: 'Rory (insert last name here), was a fashionable girl with blue eyes, straight hair, with an overall look saying that she was beautiful.
( she had gotten a whole is wardrobe over the summer): (She got a whole new wardrobe during the summer.) *Grammar. Very important. Your story has to have a good base, meaning it has to have good grammar in order for everything to make sense. By the way, you don't have to be beautiful and sexy for men to like you. Rory and Hermione sound a bit like sluts.*

Abbreviations= Very picky. K: Okay, BFF: Best friend forever, OMG: Oh my God, Oh my gosh, U: You. *Whenever your in a story, never use abbreviations unless it was like that in the real Harry Potter stories. It doesn't lure the reader into you story.*

OCCness: *We have no idea who Rory is... At least tell what year she is in, how she and Hermione had become friends, her last name and if she is a pureblood or not, and what house she is in. We don't really need to know that Rory is sexy... What about her personality? Hermione is too OOC, unless you intended to. Ron and Harry= TOO OOCness. You should try to at least make them in their character.*

The most important thing I suggest is to have a beta. Sorry for the harshness, but that's just me.



Author's Response: I know but it's my first story come on cut me some slack. Also I was going to edit the story some more but I didn't have time and they just posted the story. Just because they are pretty doesn't mean that they are sluts.Well would you like to be my BETA?

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Review #5, by buzzy Another Year Begins

12th May 2006:
more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Review #6, by D'artagnan Another Year Begins

12th May 2006:
Using text speak like BFF and OMG is letting your story down.Stop using it if you want to give a professional impression

Author's Response: Got it, i'll try to fix that thanx for the advice.

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Review #7, by HermioneG149 Another Year Begins

11th May 2006:
Yay! I love Draco/Hermione fanfics too! My favs are Hermione is a pureblood stories! Great Job! Please update soon!
HermioneG149

Author's Response: I'm glad you like it. I'll try to update as soon as I can. Toodles!

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