You have every right to be proud of this one. At first with all the repetitiveness of Narcissa loving white i was getting annoyed, but as i keep reading i realized it was necessary because with as many times as you said it the color white was framed in my mind when she heard of Sirius' death.

Ever since reading HBP i wondered how Bella and Cissy would take his death, because harry mentions Tonks and her sadness for Lupin and he thought it was sadness for Sirius.

This is nearly perfect Characterization of them BOTH and your details and imagery were phenomenal. Great read.

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*sob*

That was amazing.

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Holy crow! Is the boy in the picture Sirius? Thats very great! I like your writing skills! :) Keep it up.

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This is a wonderful insight into Narcissa's feelings the night Sirius died. We know how his death affected Harry, but we do not often think about his cousin. Thank you.

You did an excellent job on this story and you SHOULD be proud of it.

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I loved it and it brought tears to my eyes. Imagining Narcissa being so vulnerable was very contrasting to how she is often portrayed.
Also Bella, Cissa and Sirius's relationships are so well thought out and believable.
As I said I absolutly loved it.

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that was very depressing!! but i rreally enjoyed it...and narcissa seemed more like a person than a wicked to the core female dog!!
i liked the relationship between sirius and cissa, also her love for white it was creative and pure.
-Lyra

Author's Response: Thanks so much for the review, Lyra! It was meant to be depressing, so I'm glad you saw it that way, lol. Also, I'm glad you liked my Narcissa...I tried to make her as human as possible. Thanks for your compliments! ~Cat

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Wooow. This was so amazing. I just loved reading this, and the thing that I loved most was your original writing style. I love how there are so many seperate paragraphs, and how you write in present tense. You have a style of writing that is all your own, and it really captures the readers attention. The added bits of the colors, like white and red, really added to the appeal of the story. You have real talent, and I am just amazed at how brilliant this story was! Personally, I adore Narcissa as someone to write about in fanfictions, because I think there's something to her that JK hasn't written about, you know? Well, anyway, I'm rambling. This was just brilliantly done, and it fits in with the books very well. Thank you for this, it was beautiful! =)

Author's Response: Wow, thanks so much, I'm flattered :) Your comments on my writing style mean a lot, because I think that's a wonderful compliment, so thank you! I'm really glad you enjoyed the story; I love Narcissa too, because she's kind of myserious; I love to characterize her. Thanks so much again for reviewing! ~Cat

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And you should be proud of this one =) I really enjoyed reading it.

Author's Response: Aw, thank you! I'm really glad you enjoyed it! ~Cat

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amazing amazing amazing writing. seriously you're absolutely brilliant. all of the feelings expressed between narcissa and bellatrix pull you in , making you feel as if youre rly there experiencing and feeling everything. quite heartwreching. amazing job=]

Author's Response: Wow, thanks so much, I'm flattered! I'm glad you liked the Bella/Cissa scene, it was my favourite to write. I'm currently writing a Narcissa short story, so check back soon! [/shameless plug]:P ~Cat

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How brilliant is this?! It's amazing!
The whole mood of it is really lovely, and it makes you really feel for Narcissa. We have a whole lot more sympathy for her character now!
Your use of colour and visual imagery works really well, too.
And we love the fact she had a soft spot for Sirius!

10/10

Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much, Clu, I'm flattered! I'm glad I made you feel for Narcissa, I was hoping to evoke that feeling. Thank you so much for a wonderful review! ~Cat

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its amazing, i didnt get to read the whole thing as my sister is kicking me off, yet still i am crying. i felt i have to review. sorry it is so short. xXx

Author's Response: Thanks so much, I'm really glad you enjoyed it! And don't worry about the shortness, all reviews are good :) ~Cat

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i's wonderful. just wondeful. and its weritren really well, all the feelings, all the thoughts...just one word i have for it: wonderful.

Author's Response: Thanks so much, I'm flattered! ~Cat

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Wow, I really like it! I like stories that show a different insight into the Black family, I always have, and I have one of my own as well, though slightly angsty; something that can't be evaded when involving any member of said family. Your story though gives me an idea on the closeness of sirius and narcissa; it, for some reason seems likely, and I have seen it before.
Thanks again!
SnowyBella

Author's Response: Bella, thanks again for a lovely review! I like stories with insight on them too...I'll check out yours :) I'm really glad you enjoyed it, thanks for reviewing! ~Cat

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I really do love stories that show the Black children's good side. Narcissa has always been kinder than her sister in my opinion and we all know that she has love in her. 10/10

Author's Response: Thanks, Belle! I'm really glad you liked it, thanks so much for reviewing! ~Cat

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Meep. I got a tear in my eye over that. Poor Cissy, i never thought i would hear mysaelf say that, but i am saying it now. Poor Cissy, poor poor Sirius...

That was a amazing! I loved the way you described her feverish control of the colour 'white'. It was an interesting idea which had never occured to me.

When you were describing Cissy's eyes this stuck " A tiny ripple in the smooth perfection." It was perfect! It got me totally hooked!

Anyway... rambling! Another awesome one-shot, another example of how good you are at writing! :)

10000/10
~Cadi
x

Author's Response: Don't worry, I love these rambling reviews! :) Thank you so much for this! It was my aim to get people sympathizing with Cissy, so I'm glad it worked!


The white theme, funnily enough, was never intended to be a big part of this. It was merely going to be one line that would help demonstrate her personality...and then it kind of took over, lol.


Anyway, I am so glad you liked this, and I am beyond flattered by this review. Thank you so, so much! ~Cat

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It was so sad, Cat. I got quite teary, though I didn't cry (I'm proud of myself lol)

I really like the idea that Narcissa's favourite colour is white; as white is the contrast colour to her last name and to the colour of death, Black. I love how fragile you portrayed Narcissa, and how obvious her love for Lucius is, but how you also made Narcissa leave Bellatrix and have her only break down fully when she hears of Sirius' death, not Lucius' imprisonment. The only problem, and it's not even really a problem, just a suggestion, is the addition of a mention of Andromeda in here. I'm not sure how you'd interpret Narcissa's feelings for her other sister, but I think that she'd think of Andromeda when she thinks of Sirius... as supposedly, Sirius favourite cousin was Andromeda.

Great job, Cat!

-Terri

Author's Response: Aw, Terri, thank you so much for the lovely, lovely review!


I'm really glad you liked it so much; and you know, that's exactly what I was thinking when I picked white :) And thank you so much for pointing out Andromeda! I'm absolutely horrified to realise, only now, I didn't even consider her when I wrote it! I'll look over it soon, and see if I can mention her :)


Thanks so much for reviewing, Terri! *hugs* ~Cat

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Aww...I luffled it! It was very sweet.

Author's Response: Thanks so much for the review, I'm really glad you liked it! ~Cat

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it sucked. you suck. the world sucks. it all sucks....

ok sry. It was actually okay and makes me look at her from another point of view. However, after I compare it to your other masterpieces, I can't really say I loved it.

Author's Response: Erm....I'm glad you thought it was ok...and thanks for the compliment at the end! ~Cat

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That was really beautiful, Cathy! I read it with a lump in my throat. I never pictured Narcissa to be like you described her to be. But you certainly convinced me with your skill. I didn't even recognize it was Sirius in that photo intill I read the last line. And was the girl Narcissa?

One question though, who said this line,"Maybe he thought you were too far gone to be saved,” she whispers. “Maybe I was, too." I am kinda confused. Other than that, I hardly found any mistake or typo. Great work, Cathy! Keep it up. I'll be reading your other stories too. I am sure I'll love them :)

Author's Response: Hi, Tahi! Aw, thanks so much for the compliments! A lot of people have said they didn't realise it was Sirius; and yes, it was Narcissa ;)


I believe it was Bellatrix who said that line. Sorry for the confusion! Anyway, thanks so much for reviewing, and the wonderful compliments! :) ~Cat

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That was so amazing. 10/10

Author's Response: Aw, thank you so much! I'm glad you thought enough of it to rank it 10, that's one of the best compliments I can get :) ~Cat

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Fabulous!!! I stand & applaud thee Maid Rainbow!! I absolutely loved the eloquence personified in Narcissa. Marvolous write!!

Author's Response: Oh, thanks Mum! I'm so pleased you liked it that much :) Thanks so much for the compliments, it's made my day! ~Cat

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I really love how you connect Narcissa and the color white. You also write her feelings and her relationships with people beautifully. I think she’s rather numb, is that what you’re going for? Anyway, great job on the fic! Keep writing.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm thrilled you liked it :) Yes, numb is what I was going for; it's difficult to explain, but it is kind of the best way to describe her feelings for the better part of this :) ~Cat

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That was soooo incredibly sad!!! It was a wonderful story, but it made me want to cry! It was wonderfully written, and a wonderful view of Narcissa! I love stories about the Black Sisters, so, yeah... This was sooo sad (but good!)!!! love, glPiItTtAer

Author's Response: Ohh, thanks so much glPiItTtAer! I'm so glad you liked it, and glad it...well, made you sad :P Thank you heaps! ~Cathryn

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This is really beautifully written, similar to a stream-of-consciousness piece. I like it a lot, wonderful job!

Author's Response: Aw, thank you nicalyse! I'm so pleased you enjoyed it! I am rather proud of this story, so I love hearing it's good :) ~Cathryn

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Of course I could tell. I love reading those missing moments! Ooh, and present tense! Nice job with it. Though it is so strange that white of all colors is her favourite. What a paradox! But imagine white on her pale skin, she’d disappear. Why white? Oh oh, some sentences are quite short, some are just fragments. While it is okay that way, they should be fewer, as a pattern starts to occur. There is a place, where you use ‘she’ too much, and it turns out a little awkward. One correction – Lucius’s!

I really liked Narcissa’s characterization. I always imagined her as the good gone bad type. But her heart is still pure in your work, that’s what always hooks me onto a story. The twist. The thoughts of the lost souls. You have really captured that concept well. It is a great piece of fiction! You should be proud! It is profound and you really get into her head and heart. That’s what all authors try to achieve. I really liked those parts best: He tried to save me, “Maybe he thought you were too far gone to be saved,” But nothing will ever wipe the memory of the grin on the face of the innocent little boy. Yeah, the last sentence just did it for the story. I really love Sirius as a tragic hero, and all the transformations he went through. He used to be innocent, untainted, and carefree, and life made him miserable and broken. But I digress. Thank you for writing such a great psychological portrayal. There should be more out there :)

Author's Response: Wow, Lyn, thank you so much for the brilliant review! It's made my day :D


Firstly to your question; why white? Well, as you mention later in the review, I've made it so she is still pure inside, and white is the colour of innocence and purity. Also, as a previous reviewer noted, it seemed ironic that white was the colour she chose to hide behind, yet everything shows up on white. I guess white, for me, was just the obvious choice :)


Thanks for your comments; I know the sentences are short and fragmented, that's how I wrote it to be. It was mainly written that way to give the reader an understanding more of her feelings; I agree that some may be too short, and I mean to fix that. I'll check the she's too...and I'll fix the Lucius thing. Thanks for pointing those out!


I'm glad you liked her characterization. That was one thing I worried about while writing it; that people wouldn't like the purity I tried to put into a character painted quite nastily. I tried to draw from the scene at Snapes in HBP. And I have to say; those two lines have to be my favourites too. In fact, the whole story was created from those lines of dialogue between Bella and Narcissa.


Once more, thank you for such a wonderful review. I really love getting ones like this :D Thank you! ~Cathryn

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