First of all: this song, is AMAZING. I love it with my life, definately one of my top 5. It makes me very happy to see someone else appreciate such a great song! Secondly, the story goes very well with it :) I think you did a good job with the characters and their emotions. I think it is a really well done story, and I applaud you!
Hayleekins Report Review
Before I forget, butterbeer is one word.
Onto the good stuff then. You do a wonderful job of portraying emotion in this fic. I really felt for the characters. It was easy to put myself into the situation, which, in itself, was quite believable. Each pairing, Ron/Hermione, Harry/Akina, they all have magnificent chemistry and play very well off of eachother. I never once questioned the nature of their relationships. Also, I was very impressed by the turn around in this story. Usually in a fic like this, the switch (Ron being a drunk to Hermione being a drunk) feels strange and out of context, almost like you're suddenly half way into a completely different story. But in yours, there was a delightful flow throughout that was quite successful in keeping me interested. The irony we mastefully written. Well done!
As for what needs work, you make a number of grammatical and spelling errors and your sentences tend to run into eachother. At times, because of these mistakes, the fic becomes a little hard to follow. I suggest finding a good beta on the forums to help you out with all that. It'll make a world of difference, believe me.
On the whole, Whiskey Lullaby (love that song by the way) is a beautifully haunting piece of fanfiction that I think people will truely enjoy. I know I did! You're a wonderful writer, buriedalivebylove, really. Great work! Author's Response: Oh wow, I really don't know what to say. Like your review for Jupiter, you made me feel really good about my writing. As for the finding a beta, I appreciate your advice for me to get one, and I did advertise in the help wanted forum after reading this. I thank you so much again. Really. Report Review
depressingAuthor's Response: That was the idea Report Review
oh mi gi.... it almost made me cry *sniffle* thats really good!Author's Response: I'm glad to know that my writing can move a person that much. Thanks! Report Review
that was so sad, i just wish that i had the music to go with it.
loved it absolutely.Author's Response: Thanks so very much for taking the time to review.
xoxo Report Review
Aww! im sorry to hear this fic matches your mood! It is very sad, but good at the same time. the song was v. fittingAuthor's Response: Thanks for reviewing lovely <33 Report Review
Wow...that was great. So sad but very nice how you wrote it. I wrote a song fic to this too if you want to read it. Anyways, great job.Author's Response: Thanks. I'm gonna read and review it today. Thanks so much for being my first reviewer Report Review
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