I reached a count of over 100 spelling and grammatical errors before I was halfway through the chapter. Spell checks aren't exactly difficult to use, you know. I shall stop reading now as I can't read without getting angry.

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he might be talking about ron and hermione but he might also be about duncan. i think maybe harry should see his arm

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i figured with the ear thing he was an elf, can't wait to read the next chapter. suggestion spell check.

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Great start i just don't like how everything is so close together..

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Thanks for the read mate, it was interesting and captivating...thanks again for letting me wander around in your version of the potter world, was fun!

cant wait to read the sequel...

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interesting...just outta curiousity, why can't harry remember anything???

Love the party scene, its got a good balance of emotion...

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nic`e battle scene...what harvest was ole vol-der-butt talking about???

Was sorta hoping duncan had more weapons, maybe next chapter huh???

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I really like this chapter, it had everything and left you wanting more, your really good at the whole suspence shindig...lol! so im guessing harry ends up with gin???

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wonderful ...wonderful.really great...i liket it much

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Hi, I liked the idea in your story but it was very confusing with the grammar, I just wondered if you would like a hand with sorting it all out into more manageable paragraphs, I just wondered also how old you were and whether English was your first language which would explain some of the confusion.


I loved the idea of using letters within your story too, please please get back to me on this one because your story has great potential, and I would be more than happy to edit for you!

Alicia x

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um. there are literally over a hundred small mistakes in this story already. most of the grammar and spelling... but the style of your writing... is cringeworthy... i admire you for writing this much but mke it easier to read. Dont draw 1 sentence out into four... basically... get someone to edit it for you... cause it literally scares me... you had to have noticed this when you were writing it and i know im a hypocrite for the "..."s but this story has already lost its appeal to me.

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I've read Barb's fics and this one already but I got bored && read psychic serpant and this one because Ialways felt that this was a better plot than her second one. However, the grammer and spelling in your chapters are not up to scratch- I think that you need a Beta.

Aside from that I think that this fic is fantastic but please space out the paragraphs. Big blocks of text put people off and tbh it really hurts my eyes =[

For future info, there should be a space between each spoken line eng:

"good morning harry," said dumbledore.

"Hello..."

Different descriptions should also be like this.

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Have you considered fixing the spelling and spaces? 'Cause it's reallt off putting!

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Your word substitutions i.e. less for else and lack of a competent editor have forced me to stop reading your story.

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I've read this story a few times and your other one but what I want to know is what the hell happened in the forest last year. From your point of view. The stories are good but I was kinda lost when I first read it so I think you should make a story for what happened in the forrest last year or something. Thank You, by the way can you check out my story.

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I began to read this story but just couldn't cope with all the appalling grammer/spelling error's. They detract from the story and make it impossible to get into it. You urgently need an editor.

Sorry for the poor review I know it sucks but so does the grammer etc.Rick

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ginny's name is ginerva just an fyi

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bloody brilliant story there man completely different plot i like it very much may let harry blow the two of them up would have been nice just kiddin keep writing

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very good so far i like the plot but harry has too much of a noble streak with sorry this and sorry that and the story is just full of so so many spelling and grammatical errors u could have done a beta reading write can i be urs ?

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your story is very good, but there are a lot, a lot of typos... and there are also large paragraphs that could be broken up so they don't seem so long... your plot is excellent so far but if you read over your story and found the lil mess ups, it would be much better and easier to read


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With the exception of the grammar mistakes which made the story cloudy at times, I really loved it. Is there a seqel?

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pfffft!!! NO WAY! it cant have finished :( now im depressed! i hope there is a sequel!!!! *crosses fingers* in fact im gonna go check!!!

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woooooooooooooo... finally!!! jeeez i hate Harry/ Ginny fix usually (lol the 6th real book ANNOYED ME!) but i think it goes well with this one! pssst i have got signed out an i cba signin in again!

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i usually hate harry/ginny fics but i think that it owuld be better to be a h/g fic tahn a h/h one... be way too aukward (sp??)

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dun dun dunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!

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