Hello!! This story isn't exactly new so I don't know if you still check in for the reviews, anyway here my review!
First thing: I won't say why the spanish titles 'cause actually I'm Italian! ahah! so the italian title was the first thing that made me want to read your story and it was worth it! I liked more the scene with the trio in the common room but also the description of sirius, so dark, and i loved Dung's comment at the end of the paragraph...
I'm curious about all the figlia dei morti thing, but you said you couldn't use your account so problably there won't be any more chapters...sigh...
One last thing: in the chapter titles there is a mistake, it's il regalo di James and il programma di Voldemort,but it's not a big error and all my reviews are full of mistakes!! I loved your idea about the language thing!!
You're a great writer, it's very well written!!
Ciao! Report Review
Hey, this looks good! I love this! Please continue, you've really caught my interest. Your writing is lovely. Report Review
I think you made a timeline mistake when you first flashed back to Harry and Ron with the time turner. Second, I'm assuming your story follows post HBP, seeing how McGonagall is headmistress now and what not but if it is in sequence, wouldn't Harry and Ginny been broken up already? This isn't exactly criticism but a correction I guess. Other than that, I liked the recap with Bellatrix and Voldemort trying to find La Figlia Dei Morti. It sounds so Dan Brown-ish (He's the author to Da Vinci Code and Angels and Demons). As for my story, it's called 'Protector of Mankind' and it's pre-HBP, which is basically a substitute 6th year fic hahah. I do hope you'd give it a read ^_^. Report Review
The flashback was done really well, of course with minor grammar things here and there. But I'm not here to get to the nit and grit of that. The personification you gave to the common room was very macabre, the room almost felt like it was alive! That was one of my favorite parts. As for the letter, "he ultimate sacrifice a parent can give to their child!" No offense, but I think that's been drilled into Harry's head numerous times already so repeating it wasn't necessary. Report Review
My e-mail address for this account has not been in the database for months, and lately admins have ignored my requests to get it back on :(. So the TakeMeAway account is DEAD FOREVER!!! My other account has now been suspended because I transferred La Figlia Dei Morti to that one so I could edit it. So yeah. These fics will not be updated. Report Review
hey gurl, where are you?? you cant possibly still be banned from the site can you? omg, you havent died have you?? that would be tragic!! PLZ UPDATE SOON!!!!!! take care~*~MC01 ;-P Report Review
great story, can't wait to read more Report Review
This is your best story, without dubt. Very well written, thrilling and interesting. Pleace update soon. Report Review
I love this story! It is really good! Update soon! Report Review
Wonderfully written, and your not even 15 yet? Wow. Well I'm impressed, thanks for the review on my story, and I've got the next chapter up... or it will be soon! Report Review
I don't know which tory it is that you wanted me to read, but I chose this one. Great job, keep writing! Report Review
OoOoh.....wahts gonna happen?? youve got me trapped! this is a very well written story! im liking it more and more. i hope the next chappie comes out soon! one more thing, i think the date september 1988 was supposed to be september 1998, right? dunno, just wondered. great job so far and pleez check out my fic(title in my review for 1st chap). im going to have a new fic out sometime soon and itd be great if you could R/R that one too.(when it comes out). till next time, take care~*~MC01 ps.this is in my faves now! ;-) Report Review
this sounds like a very different but very cute story. i really like how its begun. one thing, when harry was reading the note from james, it said '...myself and padfoot(sirius) three years ago.' i think you meant thirty. it wouldnt add up right if you meant three. oh well, i still think its good and im gonna go read the next chapter right now~*~MC01 ps.sry its taken me soo long to R/R for you. pleez check out my fic, HP and the Vampyrs of Hogwarts. Report Review
Hmm...welll...erm...it was an OK chapter at best if i'm to be completely honest. I dunno, this just doesn't seem my sort of fic. Please don't take offence to the following critisisms, hopefully you can use them to improve. Firstly --- Voldemort. He seems far too humane to be convincing enough. I really can't see him showing such blatant favouritism to any of his followers so i found his compliments to Lucius very OOC. Also, his dialogue just doesn't seem to fit at all. There are way too many common words in his vocabulary that i doubt you would find him using much in cannon. The way he expresses himself just doesn't seem to match the terrifying aura that everyone has grown to assosciate with him. --- Secondly --- Harry. He seems to have adopted the hot temper he had during OotP when it has clearly been shown that he has, in fact, matured greatly since then. Thus, his character seems to have taken a huge step backwards and consequently, he too seems OOC. ---- What i'm basically trying to say is that the characters all seem to be fairly out of character. Some moreso than others. But i found Harry and Voldemort just totally unconvincing in this chapter. ---- I also noticed a lot of incidences which have been obviously dragged up from the other books. Such as Harry throwing different words at the gargoyle in an attempt to get it to open. We've all seen that already, so in a way it doesn't add much to the story and in fact makes it seem boring as we are simply being forced to re-read old material. I think you really need to attempt to branch out a little in order to make this story slighlty more original (or at least as original as fanfiction can get) and not follow the format of the books from the series so so rigidly. I also think you would do well to re-read one or two novels from the series so you can acheive a more rounded, up-to-date view of the characters. I apologize if this review upset you in any way. Though one unsatisfied reviewer out of 110 isn't bad now is it? What do i know anyway? This story may prove to be a massive hit on this site. It's doing quite well already in fact. Report Review
This fic is awesome! How else could you have gotten over 100 reviews for just two chapters?! That's why I am asking, no begging, you to update it for all of our sakes! Report Review
Alright! You've updated your story! Great job! Can't wait for the next chapter! Report Review
This is really good! Thanks for reviewing my story, and I can't wait for the next chapter. ^_^ Report Review
excellent fic so far.
Absolutely loved Harry's line about not using the time turner for educational purposes. Report Review
Absolutely brilliant pleease put the next chapter on soon Report Review
Oh, God, I'm so sorry, you guys, my account's been suspended for a while! I can't log in or get new passwords! Noooooo!!! I'm sorry!! *dodges chairs and wastepaper bins* Report Review
oooo...bad harry!!! ME WANT JAMES!! ME WANT JAMES!!! ME WANT JAMES!! ME WANT SIRI!!! ME WANT SIRI!! lol u get my point...i really like ur riting...u have a distinct style adn i love the imagery and diction!! but the character seem to no too much about their future!! besides dat no prob!! btw wut yr is this in? oh wait...nvm...mione is a hg!! so 7th...so i m guessing harry and gin are back?!?! AWESOME!! lol i LOVE dat couple!! lyl lyl cant wait for more and pls read my stories if possible!! lyl lylAuthor's Response: You want James more than Siri????? Impossible, Siri's the best! Thanx for the compliment. Don't 4get that James wrote the letter two days before his death, and they all knew that Voldemort was after them, otherwise why would they get Siri to be Secret Keeper for them? I like Harry and Ginny too, they're sooo sweet, precisely why I put them back together!! Thanx for your compliments!!! .:Sam:. Report Review
omg !!!!! wow!! tear wreaking!! amazing and i totally loved it!!! pls pls pls pls pls pls tell me dat theyr going back to the marauders time!!! i beg of u...i love those stories...well g2g and read more...lyl lylAuthor's Response: Thanx, I didn't realise chap 1 was that sad! yeah MWPP are the best stories ever!! Well, all I'm gonna say is that they DO go back to the Marauders' time! Ooooh, it's gonna be so good writing that, I can tell!!! HEEHEE!! Report Review
MWPP stands for Moony,Wormtail,Padfoot and Prongs. Come on! You could've figured that one out ;) ~ Sam MAuthor's Response: Duh ...knew it ewas something like that ... ^^; Report Review
Wonderful! I really like the way you write Voldmort and his deatheaters! Looking forward to reading more!Author's Response: Thank you! I enjoy writing about Voldemort, i reckon you need askill to get it right, which loads of people have! Report Review
Hey, just got through the first chapter. It's a very promising start. I only read the first couple of lines and knew you were a good writer. Only one critisism though. James seemed a bit too well-informed about his own future in that letter. I find it hard to believe that he expected their lives to end in the way that it did at Godrics Hollow. Other than that it was a fairly good chapter. I'll have to read the second chapter another time though, i'm a little busy, though youll recieve another review once i do read it.Author's Response: James wrote that letter a couple a dayd before Voldemort killed him. They all knew Voldemort was after them, that's why Sirius made Wormtail their Secret Keeper. Report Review
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