wow. Characterization: Hermione: She was most definitley in character for this. She showed her true Gryffindor qualities taking huge risks like that to help the order out. And she was very responsible also, plus the fact she reacted very in character to all the sucking up Draco Malfoy was doing, i almost laughed. You can tell she loves Harry though, but she has to do what's right as well. So yeah, Hermione was definitley very much in character. Harry: There are two faults to Harry, his arrogance and his anger. You really showed this through the chapter, i mean, the way he reacted when he found out about what Dumbledore was planning was very realistic. He shows that hen really cares for Hermione and he was very much definitley in character. Pansy and Ron: These were both in character as well. Snape and McGonall: ha ha lol, still trying to figure out which one was more serious, they were both very in character. Dumbledore: He was also very in character, asking a little too much of people but knowing the outcome will be for the greater good. Draco: He was the only one i found to be ever so slightly out of character, he may be a slytherin but he isn't al together stupid, he'd still hasve that six-year old grudge against her pureblood or not I think if you'd included the edginess in his persoanlity then everything would have been a lot more beleivable. Plot: This looks very interesting, interesting choice for a song, and i'm intrigued to read more. This looks promising and you're off to a very good start here. Spelling: There were definitley a fe mispelled words in theer but i do very strongly suspect that they are just typing errors, they can very easily be edited. The only advice i could give to improve on that would be to double check your chapter for spelling mistakes before posting itoff so you don't have to go through the whole editing process later on. Grammar: There were a few sentances in there where you jumbled up your wordclasses, and there was an absense iof pronouns here and there which made your sentances sound slightly repetetive but nothing that necessarily stood out. Punctuation: There were just one or two misplaced commas but nothing bad, everything else seemed to be spot on. Descriptive Language: I think this is something that could definitley be improved, it's good, i just thing a little bit more detail here and there would make everything sound much better, and create a clearer image in my head. Overall, the story sounds interesting so i'm going to continue to read on. Just remember to edit your mistakes. That's all the constructive critisism i can give. 10/10 KatieAuthor's Response: Katie - Thank you for taking the time to write such a very long review ^_^ This story is horrific and might even be deleted at this point - I wrote it three years ago and haven't looked at it since! It is absolutely not exemplary of my work. ^_^ I am glad you pulled some positives out of it though! Report Review
But- but - NO! *gasps* A decoy? Dumbledore sacrificed her? That's - I'm very indignant right now. They could have told her the truth- she would have done it anyway! Lovely story =) It really was amazing. I can't believe that plot twist at the end- and I'm so sad that Hermione died. I can't tell you how much I love your writing.Author's Response: Aw -blush- This is one of my oldest pieces - I am really flattered you like it ^_^ Report Review
"She's dead, Granger." *shivers* That was amazing- the title fit perfectly. And I wish Harry hadn't forgotten that her life depends on deciet- but Harry is always in an emotional whirlwind, so that was realistic =) I loved it. Onward!Author's Response: Thank you so much!! Report Review
Schniblets! =) *runs around panicking* What an amazing chapter- the way you described Harry's pain was so vivid, and even though she's sanctioned by the Order, Hermione truly feels as if she is betraying him. And I adore your characterization of Draco - "Take my hand" *shivers* Amazing. You are such a gifted writer.Author's Response: You flatter me too much girl!!! Thank you so much dear ^_^ Report Review
This is going to be ridiculously intense- I can tell =) It all ready is! I love it- I've never read anything that really, really conveyed what it would mean for Hermione to be with Draco. And this struck like a lightening bolt. I'd leave a longer review- but I'm too excited to get to the next chapter! 10. =)Author's Response: ^_^ Forgiven. Thank you so much for so avidly reviewing ^_^ Report Review
Second time I read this... Still so fascinating.Author's Response: wow thank you so much!!! Report Review
realy good story :) keep writingAuthor's Response: Thank you Jenna! Report Review
alright, if you were sititng right beside me know you'd probably be deaf from the amount i'm screaming. you are a combiner of loved things! Queen+HP+Moulin Rouge= BEST STORY EVER!!! damnit dumbledore, you lied! and she died! great story celtic!! p.s: UPDATE ARABESQUE SUPER SOON PLEASE!!! xx leighAuthor's Response: Thanks so much for reading!! I really appreciate your support!!! Report Review
explosive chapter!!! loving every word :D xx leighAuthor's Response: Thanks so much for reading!! I really appreciate your support!!! Report Review
AWW HARRY!! dammit dumbledore -_- great job! xx leighAuthor's Response: Thanks so much for reading!! I really appreciate your support!!! Report Review
WOAH!! i love you Celtickisses!!! you have merged my love for HP w/ my undying love for moulin rouge!!! absoloutely fabulous!! xx leighAuthor's Response: Thanks so much for reading!! I really appreciate your support!!! Report Review
This is so sad! I really like it, nut you made Harry believe Hermione was evil and you made Hermione lie and become a really good actress. And of course Gryffindor's Lioness and the Golden Trio's voice of reason is gone! It is a really good story and I think that you should write a sequel about how Harry deals with Hermione's death and how he shuts himself away, doesn't sleep, doesn't eat, doesn't speak, stays in one spot, gets mad at people at the drop of a hat, thing like that. And if you do I have the perfect song to go along! Just let me know-hermioneginnylunaAuthor's Response: I appreciate the offer! I don't think I would have tiem for a sequel with my other fics - but I do apprecite it ^_- Report Review
really good keep writingAuthor's Response: Thank you very much ^_^ Report Review
love the way it ends. Author's Response: Thank you very much Report Review
wow i have to say that the very end of this is my favorite part. its so real and so painful but beautiful at the same time. Author's Response: Thank you so much Orla ^_^ Report Review
OH THIS IS PERFECT!!! I absolutely adore this story :) It's sad... but with Harry Potter being the best book ever, and Moulin Rouge being my favorte movie, this is just amazing. I LOVE IT. 10/10 stars :DAuthor's Response: Aw ^_- Moulin Rouge is my favorite movie as well. I think I may need to go through and edit this story.. its so outdated. ^_^ Report Review
Wait, hold on, what? Draco was going to join the Order? Whoa, now that's what I call a plot twist, lol. Great story! It was so different to read a sort of anti-Dramione from you, lol. But you did a fantastic job with it. 20/10 :-PAuthor's Response: It is weird to have anti-dramione from me, eh? Wheee. ^_- Report Review
Ok, so this line was amazing: Note to self: hug Dumbledore . . . and buy him socks .. nice thick . . . wool.. no silk... silk socks. Another great chapter. I can't believe Harry and Ron are being so thick.Author's Response: Thanks love ^_^ Report Review
Poor Harry! Aww. I am not a Harry/Hermione shipper in the least, but I feel so sorry for him here. Ok, going on to the next chapter, cause the suspence is basically killing me.Author's Response: Aw suspense is good! Report Review
Ooh I love this so far! Haha, I love how they're tricking Draco into thinking she's a pureblood. That's great. I can't believe she's going to get the dark mark though!!Author's Response: Crazy huh? Glad you are enjoying! Report Review
great story Author's Response: Thank you ^_^ Report Review
I liked it a lot, more than I had initially thought I would. I'm glad you wrapped the lyrics to certain songs within the story itself. I you hadn't seen Moulin Rouge before it helped understand a bit :P. Moulin Rouge is my favorite movies (going on 8 years now!) and I think that you did it justice in a song-fic-ish way :P. I wasn't crazy about the lack of information to all of us (and Hermione) when she had first got herself into the mess... I thought Harry knew that she was acting it all out "/... because he was there in the office when it was announced. Ah, well. Good job, even with the minor confusion I suffered (lol). And, all of your banners are lovelyy. -DanaAuthor's Response: Moulin Rouge is, likewise, my favorite movie. I am glad you think I did it justice ^_^ I really hate this fic... it needs some serious updating lol. But thank you!! Report Review
I can see how much you've improved since your first story - but this is still pretty good. The plot fitted in perfectly with the song, and it was well-written. :) Over all very enjoyable, of course.Author's Response: Heh heh remarkable how much difference there is, eh? Thanks Dracana ^_^ Report Review
Great ending, very true to the theme you had going. You had me gasp and breathless. Kudos to youAuthor's Response: Thank you T! Report Review
I'm feeling Hermione's frustration at the fact that no one took a second to double back and say "So...why?". They all just took it in stride and crucified her with it. Ugh, Great work!Author's Response: thank you so much! Report Review
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