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6 Reviews Found

Review #1, by cherry_pop94 

28th December 2015:
Another great one!

I wonder where they're going to put up Eva? The Potter house perhaps? That would be hilarious to be honest.

The end with Selena's nightmare was really good. I never thought about that before, but Saint Annard was full of death and Selena was there for ages. I remember the one line, earlier in this, she said 'we had metaphysical sex in the metaphysical world.' It was funny, I mean I really did laugh out loud at that thought, but then I realized how tragic that is. And I was reminded of that here. Selena might appear to be put together, but she'll never forget that she loved Methuselah and he's dead.

Wow, I mention him in like every review and he's been dead since Ignite. Honestly, the real question here is when will I be over Methuselah? The funny thing is, I wasn't all that attached to him in Ignite, I just can't stand seeing Selena in pain.

Stefanie

Author's Response: Eva in the Potter house is, as you now know, hilarious.

Selena was in Saint Annard for a couple of days at least (I forget exactly how long). But yeah, for all the fronts she puts on, she has been through some HORRIFIC things which other people can only imagine. Saint Annard did nothing new, but it did dredge all of her brushes with death up to the surface. It's what left her so volatile in the face of her father's visit in future chapters.

But Selena gets her happy ending! Even with poor Methuselah gone. But wherever he is, Scorpius wasn't REALLY lying. He wants her happy, so he's happy.


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Review #2, by water_lily43175 

8th December 2015:
Oh my days, I'm going to have to go back and read Ignite again somewhen, if only for all those times when Scorpius tried to get into the Ravenclaw common room. I FORGOT ABOUT THE DOOR.

Ha, I love how Rose is actually very astute about Scorpius. "homo-erotically codependent', Scorbus in a nutshell.

I swear, Eva's grown to become the most morally GOOD one of the lot. It's odd, in a way, but she really does feel like she has a far better grasp upon herself than any of the others do. But then, her story arc peaked in Starfall; she's had her moment of self-destruction and self-assessment and come out the other side. No, she's not perfect, far from it, but she seems a lot more observant than any of the others do right now, even Selena.

And speaking of. It's just twigged that we haven't been in Selena's head, not PROPERLY, for a long while now. Yeah, sure, we had her chat with Lillian, but that's about it. And we still don't PROPERLY know what happened to her when she was in the Council's custody. She's as troubled as the rest of them, poor girl. Matt is so adorable when he's with her. GUH all the feels. For an accidental romance, they are so beautiful together.

Author's Response: Scorbus in a nutshell indeed. She's also been spending way too much time with Selena to be talking like that.

Eva really is the most self-aware of the group. I think it's part and parcel of redemption; she had to know who she was to know how to change, to know how to walk away from her flaws and her weaknesses. It's helped her thus become good, now she accepts compassion and a desire to help others. The rest of the characters tend to become bad people when they kid themselves over what they're doing, or at least wilfully ignore the consequences. Eva's redemption makes it harder for her to do that. She fooled herself for so long about Thane, she's not going back to that.

Yeah, part of me still wonders, sometimes, if I shouldn't have written Mattena as a romance. And then there are chapters like this where they're kind of sweet.


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Review #3, by scorprose 

22nd April 2015:
Hi. Sorry for the late review. But your writing is marvelous pl dont have any bad feelings on it. We all love your writing. update soon.

Author's Response: I must admit I was having a bad day when I wrote that author's note. ;) No worries about the late review, just thanks for taking the time to drop one at all! Glad you're enjoying the story.

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Review #4, by RelentlessFire 

21st April 2015:
Matt passes from one broken girl to another eheh
I can't wait to know more
Giulia

Author's Response: Matt apparently has a thing for trying to save girls who should save themselves. More coming all the time! Thanks for reviewing.

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Review #5, by mymischiefmanaged 

17th April 2015:
Hi! I can't believe I've gone multiple chapters without reviewing again. I'm so sorry I need to be better! But I've loved the last few chapters and I love this one.

First off, sorry again about some of the more frustrating feedback you had on the Scorpius/John moment back there. I know you said people were asking for justification and I just want to reiterate that you in no way need to justify your decisions, especially not that one. I thought it added depth to Scorpius's character we hadn't seen before. We've only known him so far as hung up on Miranda and then in love with Rose, so it was nice to see him in a more casual setting. Also I'm a huge fan of John. I'm pretty sure he won't be particularly important in this story but I hope we see some more of him because I like him a lot.

I'm looking forward to seeing Rose and Scorpius reconnect. They're both in this mess where they need to be honest with each other but there's been too much hurt for them to properly do that, and I think they need to figure out some of the other stuff going on in their lives before they'll be able to properly talk everything over. Going on this mission together is hopefully a way for them to get back on a level where they understand each other and can figure things out. Also I think Rose's reaction to walking in on Scorpius and John is really touching. She's not being judgemental at all and although it's upsetting she's not angry, which says good things about her. She recognises that she doesn't really have claims over Scorpius at the moment.

I'm intrigued by what's going to happen with Albus and Eva. She's always been such a fascinating character and I'm keen to see what their dynamic is like now that she's shifted more towards the moral end of her spectrum. I like the pace you're moving their relationship at. It wouldn't be believable if Al was too quick to forgive her, and I'm glad she sees that he's not really in the right state of mind to be making big decisions at the moment. Her doubts about Scorpius are really interesting too and I wonder whether there's some truth in what she's saying. I hope Scorpius doesn't end up getting them all hurt, especially Al. Albus's blind faith in his best friend is sweet but concerning and I'm glad Eva has recognised this.

I adore Selena as always and I like how she had a vulnerable moment here. She's letting Matt in more than she's really let any of the others in and that's a good sign. I like her friendship with Rose but I think it's much healthier for Rose than for Selena so it's good to see her letting somebody else in. ALSO I like how you've reintroduced Miranda to this story and are redeeming her a little bit from the way she was in Book One. I don't know if she'll feature much in future but it's nice to see Selena holding on to something from her old life and to see Miranda trying to adapt to help her friend, even if it's never quite going to work out.

I can sort of see what you mean about pacing in your author's note. I've really enjoyed the last few chapters and have no complaints but I agree that flow is maybe a little bit different to how it's been in the past. I wonder if it might run together a bit better if you focus each chapter around less characters? So maybe you don't need all their stories to feature in every chapter, and can instead devote more to one or two of them at a time? For example, this chapter could have had its whole focus on Rose and Scorpius and have taken their story further, and then next chapter could have dealt with Albus and Eva. It's just a suggestion and is by no means necessary, but if the story's causing you problems it might be something to try for a bit while you get back into it. Either way, I'm still loving reading and definitely don't think you need to change anything about the way you write so I wouldn't worry too much about it! Everyone has difficult writing times sometimes.

This is another wonderful chapter. Sorry for being so inconsistent reviewing recently. Looking forward to chapter 22!

Emma xx

Author's Response: Ha, it's okay, so long as you're reading and having fun, I'm happy. Reviews are the bonus. Okay, they're a bonus I love, but they're not The Point.

Thanks again for the support on the John thing. It's not going to be super important to the story, but it's an aspect of Scorpius nevertheless, and I do maintain I would have been asked much less to justify it if it had been a random girl. But, it's done and I'm not gonna change it and the plot goes forward. We may see a little John in the future!

Rose IS incredibly hurt by Scorpius and John, but she does identify that she isn't really ALLOWED to be. On the other hand, she's still a bit of a brat about it last chapter, but having calmed down she's starting to make amends and grow up and get on with what they have to do. Especially seeing as she hasn't even told Scorpius about her breakup with Matt; it's hard to get judgemental when you're sitting on something like that.

Eva sometimes has the clarity of an outsider's perspective on people like Scorpius, and the mixture of clarity and cynicism can do Albus a lot of good. Of course, Albus has to want to listen to her, and while he's kind of slowly coming around to accepting her - forgiving her's harder - we'll see if he does hang onto her words.

I think Rose hypothetically COULD support Selena, but it would take Selena specifically seeking Rose and both of them being super honest about it. While I think they could do it and get away unscathed, it's not really going to occur to either one of them to try right now - Selena will never open up to someone if she has an excuse not to, and Rose is full of excuses not to. Basically, Rose is so busy she doesn't chase Selena, and to support Selena means chasing her. Which isn't really a criticism of Rose, but it does mean Matt is way better positioned to help Selena.

We will see a little more of Miranda; not much, but she and Selena were friends for a reason and I didn't want her story to just be, 'She cheated on Scorpius once and drifted away from Selena.' Like, Scorpius and Selena both liked Miranda for a REASON, even if she was flawed. It does those two a disservice if we don't see Miranda's qualities.

Pacing has been hell. Weirdly I tried to separate out the characters plot-wise because I found in Starfall that having all six Active, Engaged characters in the same place meant that when something happened I had to stop and demonstrate how it affected ALL of them. Which took time. Compare this to Ignite, when things could happen like Scorp and Rose out in the woods which didn't need ANY kind of reaction from Methuselah or Selena; it didn't Affect them. My hope had been to separate the characters like that, but everyone's story's so bloody intertwining and COMPLEX that it's hard. However, as the plotlines separate further, your idea about a chapter JUST about one plotline/gathering of characters, and doing it like that, is a rather good idea. It won't happen just yet (if nothing else I've written first drafts up to Chapter 31), but there are a few things I'm coming up to where that route might work well.

I shall endure, regardless! But thanks for the very useful feedback, and the kind words, and the excellent review! Don't you apologise, any reviews at all are great.

~ Cath


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Review #6, by whykay 

17th April 2015:
Don't worry about the story / pacing etc. It is fine. We just get edgy because we are tantalized by the story and though you give us chunky chapters every time, we just want more. :) Everything is dandy and as I have always said, it's your devotion to your characters as well as the storyline that makes you stand out. It's awesome!

Now back to the hauntingly beautiful chapter - this was really good, though I could not figure out the turning point for Rose - was it normalcy? Because I sure didn't see it through her inability to have a decent conversation and prolonging her misery.

Of course there is more to Scorpius keeping away. I suspect it's him thinking he will die soon - maybe that's what Thane told him to keep him fighting alongside him (though it feels unnatural that Thane would manipulate him in *this* particular way).

I have been wondering about your theme for Oblivion - what does one deserve? Who deserves what also rests on the choices they made - did they make the easier choice or the harder choice? Which one is what, and at what time??! And on what basis do you judge them? Such wonderful philosophical questions! :)

Albus-Eva and Scorpius' death really threw everybody, including Matt, who didn't even like him, to their worst moments. And they coped the way they did and suddenly when Scorpius came back, everyone started looking at themselves and their choices and I don't think anybody was happy. Of course, if Scop had come back immediately, he would have been blameless. I still can buy his whole point about not finding Albus and seeing Rose move on... if not for the fact that he has been behaving and talking really mature about dead boyfriends wanting their exes to be happy. That leads me to conclude that he must be scared for his mortality and he didn't want to upset the apple cart twice over. Or will he, if it happens again? - will they be better prepared to face it, if that's ever possible? This really tugs at my heart and makes me want to legilimens you to find out your intentions.

And I love how you have turned this story to its larger purpose, one which is larger than Scorose.

Matt - this was so poignant and deep - him admitting how dark it was without Selena and Scorpius. He lost a hand and got a tonne of wisdom. Not bad at all. And I love he GOT Selena's loneliness and realized shallow promises - she never was and has never been the center of attention for her Lillian or her father. Up came the mask of gaiety and then came Methuselah, who tore down everything. And then he went and as she healed, Matt came with a glimmer of hope, only to ditch her for Rose. No wonder the Chalice latched onto her loneliness and magnified it, bringing her nightmares. And I must say, what a wonderful catch about Miranda! It really accentuated Selena's loneliness in a lovely, obtuse way. And I understand why Matt related to that - he woke up to see Rose with Scorpius. :D

Anyway, can't wait! Please do keep going!!! I can't speak for others but its impossible for me to get disappointed in your writing. :P

Author's Response: You guys are always so awesome. It was a pretty whiny Author's Note, I freely confess (I was having a bad day and I knew this chapter didn't progress plot as much as I might have liked, and was thus sulky), so I'm kind of regretting it, but reviews like this always cheer me up anyway. ;)

Rose has basically Calmed Down. She was prepared to work with Scorpius before the John thing, and now she's had the chance to chill out. She chose to sign up with him and she knows she's being rude at him. Deep down she doesn't want to be distant from him, and she knows it's illogical to push him away when they're working together, so for once she can't wallow.

Scorpius does still have his secrets. As do I!

I'm sure I had ANOTHER 'clever' theme that Oblivion was about (not intentionally, it just crept up on me) but I've soundly forgotten it, and 'what do you deserve' is absolutely the #1 theme. It's tough. Most of all for Eva, which I think is why she's turning out so strong (I think) in this story, but it's tough for everyone.

Selena's 'I'm always alone,' was one of those lines I didn't mean to write until I wrote it. Like, I didn't even consciously see that about Selena, and then the words were on the screen and I had to sit back and stare at what I'd written, because of course it's true, of course it's been the absolute defining factor of her. Methuselah made her Not Alone. Then she lost him. Matt is starting to Get It.

Miranda isn't a BIG part of Oblivion, not at all, but we do get a little bit more work and resolution on her and Selena.

Thanks a bunch for the review. ;) I promise I shall stop being whiny Slide about this - sometimes I am my own worst critic - but I always appreciate this kind of feedback anyway!


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