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15 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Tildis 

1st January 2016:
Wow, i just LOVE this chapter. Its mesmerising how their love is so strong and how they are able to express this love without words. This was a pleasure to read, you truly showed that you have a way with words that goes without saying. Kudos to you!!

Author's Response: Hi there Tildis!

I'm so, SO sorry that I've taken so long to respond to this. I was so excited to see that you took the time to leave a review on my story. I'm really fond of this chapter too! I really wanted to convey their deep emotional attachment to each other - and how it goes beyond passion and love.

Thanks so much!

♥ Beth


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Review #2, by AutumnRed 

1st November 2015:
I. Love. This. Chapter.

I mean, I love every chapter really. But I absolutely adore this one. Usually I like more conversation than description, as I'm impatient. These paragraphs, however, were so captivating that I couldn't look away or speed through.

The bathing scene is incredible. Like you described it: unhurried and magnificent.

xoxo,
AutumnRed.

Author's Response: Hi there AutumnRed! Thanks so much for taking the time to leave a review. It was so lovely to log in today and see this. I really did enjoy writing this chapter - I thought it was high time and Rose and Scorpius to get together ;)

Thanks again!

♥ Beth


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Review #3, by Penelope Inkwell 

17th October 2015:
Hey Beth! Here for review #2 of our swap! :)

So, this didn't go the direction I was expecting, and I'm quite happy with that. I like how, even though the last section showed us that Scorpius still wasn't a perfect communicator, this chapter showed how good a fit he and Rose are despite that. They may not always know what the other is thinking, but they get each other. Rose understood that what Scorpius needed was the reassurance that she accepted him totally, just as he was, and she gives him that. They aren't always good with words, but they can sometimes communicate without them.

This chapter was just like this huge exhalation of relief. Here I was expecting more confusion and arguments and words, and this was just...calm. Soothing. It was a "we're gonna be okay" chapter, and I think that it was very well placed. I also like your idea to keep this chapter short and separate from what else to come. I think it reiterates that, in the midst of all the craziness, this is a sweet, even sacred, moment between them. A little bubble of calm and love. I think this whole chapter was just super important, both to their development and to the pacing of the story.



CC: Well, it's gonna be nitpicky, obviously, because you write so well. So, fair warning ;)

“Don’t think he’ll be back tonight,” Al said, referring to James as his head twisted to claim Selenia’s mouth.
--You've already written "referring to James" here to clarify Al's meaning, which is good. However, I think changing "said" to "added" might help with that endeavor, because it helps show that Al's comment is not a new statement, but an add on to his previous words before Scorpius interrupted with his internal monologue.

His left arm was bare and still bore the marks from battle.
I knew that I was approximately thirty seconds away from seeing more of Al than just his naked arm.
--like, how is his arm naked? Is his sleeve rolled up? Cut away? I was just trying to figure out what was going on here and how to picture it, since it's mentioned several times.

Her hands found the fastening to my robes and she deftly undid the clasp. She glided it off my shoulders and let it fall to the ground.
--I think maybe "glided" would be better as "guided" (though honestly I didn't notice that the first time I looked at the sentence). And also, I think maybe it should be "She guided them off my shoulders," because it seems like he'd be referring to her gliding/guiding the robes (plural), rather than the clasp (singular)

Rose’s lifted a cloth dampened with soap and warm water.
--It seemed like this should be "Rose" instead of "Rose's"

I am a nitpicky monster! Please do not pitchfork me!



Al and I had been effectively living together for ten years, which means that Selenia and I had been effectively living together for seven years.
--I loved this little bit of humor right there in the beginning. It made me smile.

My fingers reached toward her face to trace the side of her cheek, but the contrast between my filth covered hands and her porcelain skin caused me to recoil and pull away from her.
--oooh, symbolism. Poor Scorpius. It's not your fault. Well, I mean, the actual dirt kind of is? But not the emotional dirt of your family legacy. Not your fault. Poor baby. At least Rose understands. I really loved how understanding she was. I love them.

You did a great job in imbuing this scene with emotion and tenderness and understanding, all without any dialogue! Again, I think that was a great choice. Nice work, as always!

--Penny

Author's Response: Hi there Penny,

I'm working through my unanswered reviews and I still have two left from our swap! Sheesh - I'm sorry about this. I'm so glad you liked this chapter and found it a welcome reprieve to the angst and action that's been going on. I felt it was necessary to give the couple some time to comfort each other. They both are in the process of recovery and Scorpius really needed to know that Rose wasn't about to blame him for his family's past.

Thanks for all the cc. I made those changes you suggested. As far as Albus's bare arm goes, Rose had to remove the entire sleeve the night before. It was mentioned in the chapter before. But I guess if you aren't reading the story all at once, it would be easy to forget that.

Thanks again, Penny - your reviews are so helpful and awesome!

♥ Beth


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Review #4, by MrsJaydeMalfoy 

21st September 2015:
Awww, YAY! I'm so glad that they're okay - I was really worried that Scorpius was going to go mental and try to break up with her! But it was SO nice to see them have such a lovely, calm moment together after everything that's happened.

Another great chapter, and I'm off to the next!

Author's Response: Hiya,

I loved writing this chapter, and I loved writing the two of them together. In a weird sort of way, it made *me* calm to finally give them this moment.

Thanks so much!

♥ Beth


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Review #5, by Tonks1247 

11th July 2015:
AHHH! Oh my gosh, I forgot about this chapter!

This was such a sweet, sweet moment for the two of them. It was something they both needed, to just both be there and together for a while and to figure out, without words, that they were okay. The fact that an apology didn’t need to be given, that they both understood each other and the emotions that came through…I mean, they should have talked a little bit to clear up the air, but that’s just the logical part of my mind talking. The emotional part of me is in love with this chapter and how it was so sweet and so simple. It was such a great moment for these two, and a needed one for them to be able to move forward with less secrets than before.

And I could go on, repeating how lovely this chapter was, and how well written it was, and how much I love Rose and Scorpius and how much they are such a good fit for each other, but I would honestly just be saying the same thing in a million ways.

Lovely, lovely chapter!
-Mikaela

Author's Response: Mikaela,

Okay, I admit that I'm pretty happy with how this chapter turned out. I began writing it and got really into it when I suddenly realized I hadn't put in any dialog between the two of them - so I just went with it and I think it was really the best thing for the two of them to just *be* together instead of worrying about what to say and how to say it. (sorry for the run-on)

Aw, I'm so, so touched that you felt so connected to the two of them as a couple. That's what I was going for here and gah! Thank you so much!

♥ Beth


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Review #6, by crestwood 

12th June 2015:
Al and Selenia are my second favorite couple after Scorpius and Rose. I'm not sure why. I suppose their relationship seems very public, but not for the sake of showing off. It just feels like they literally can't keep away from one another. So cute.

I find it funny that they apparate inside of their house. Even in a big house that seems like such a silly wizard thing. (even though I'd totally never walk if I could apparate, honestly)

You're able to write scenes in which people communicate so much without any words at all. Such masterful writing. I'll never be able to do what you do with romance. Which I suppose is saying something since I'm primarily a romance writer. I'm actually blown away by this chapter. Basically in tears. Once again, this is my favorite Scorose ever and probably always will be.

Slytherin - House Cup 2015 Review

Author's Response: Haha - yeah, I really love Albus and Selenia too. They are the couple that's been together forever and is so solid but at the same time, still act like they've just gotten together. It's sickeningly cute. In most other respects they are very conservative, but they've got this super powerful attraction to each other.

Haha - the apparation inside the house is because I remember Fred and George doing it when they first got their licenses. Plus, the house is old with really steep stairs and since the kitchen is in the basement, I figured that people who had rooms on the upper levels would find it much faster ;)

Joey! Pish posh on you! Your Anthony Goldstein story is BREATHTAKING with the wordless communication.

But I have to say that I am pretty proud of this chapter (and I'm blushing while writing this because even though I know I have a lot of reviews on this story, I still am pretty unsure of my writing as a whole - I always get so stressed out when I post something new).

Thank you so much Joey, you have no idea how much these reviews mean to me ♥

Love ya, Beth


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Review #7, by merlins beard 

6th May 2015:
Oh my god...

Seriously, is there a mail order for guys like Scorpius? I want one!
He is so perfect for Rose and Rose is so perfect for him. The way you wrote the characters amazes me. They seem to be nothing without each other, both broken and barely able to function on their own, yet when they are together, the world rights itself and they can take on anything.
Truly two halves of one whole.

I am so incredibly happy that they aren't constantly fighting because of small misunderstandings, as they often do in other fics.

It is like Rose's therapist said in that one chapter: You can talk without using words.
They were not too good at verbal communication over sensitive topics, but they have developed a language they both understand, where everything is allowed, where they can talk about everything.
This chapter is one of the very few on this site that has made me feel really intimidated by its unlimited perfection in every little detail.
I learned so much by just reading this chapter. I think I'll have to read it again and take notes next time :D

Thanks so much
~Anja

Author's Response: asdfkl;'!

I don't know how to respond to this. I mean.

Thanks so much. I just...

Thank you. You've made my whole year with this.


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Review #8, by ValiantMD 

12th September 2014:
such beautiful love.

Author's Response: Hiya!

Thanks so much for this! It was such a treat to wake up and see this sweet review!

Thanks!

Beth


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Review #9, by luciusobsessed 

21st August 2014:
Idk why but I think Al and Selenia are super cute. I wish you would write a fanfic about them only. I love that little Scorp/Rose shower moment, you wrote it so elegantly. I hope you update soon because I love this story and I need to know what happens next!!

Author's Response: Hi!

So glad to see you back for this. I let out a squee when I saw you had left me more reviews. Thanks so much!

Awe, you liked the shower scene - yay! That took a while to get how I wanted it, but I was pretty happy with how it ended up.

I'm working on the next chapter and it's kind of stuck right now, but after I get over this hurdle, updates will be faster.

Thanks again!

Beth


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Review #10, by LightLeviosa5443 

20th August 2014:
OKAY. SO THIS.

EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IS PERFECTION.

LIKE I LITERALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO PUT IN THIS REVIEW BECAUSE EVERYTIME I TRY TO TALK ABOUT IT IM JUST GOO AND CAN'T FORM NORMAL WORDS AND IT LITERALLY COMES OUT LIKE ROSE TRYING TELL SCORPIUS HE'S HOT.

LIKE LITERALLY.

Your descriptions. I'll start there. Everything was so tender and sweet and carefully done and I just loved how gentle everything was. I feel like this chapter could've gone a lot of ways and you took so much care with it that it came out remarkably beautiful.

The emotions. This chapter was like one ball of every emotion known to everyone ever. Like it was just so jam packed with all of these emotions and moments and I just wanted to melt in them. I think I did melt in them.

Everything about this was just wonderful. I loved every single word in this chapter. I normally try not to pressure people to update, but gurl you need to update soon. I might die if you don't. No joke.

xoxo Sarah ♥

Author's Response: Hey,

Wow. This review was amazing. I'm so glad that the emotions and tenderness came through. I always get super nervous when I write the love scenes because I don't want them to be cliche or silly or just plain unrealistic. So I think relief is my first emotion. But you've put me over the top with your kind, lovely words.

I really, really wanted to show that their relationship was more than just a great love, more than mutual respect, so much more because... well, you know because you know a bit more about the story ;) I'm so glad that it was successful.

Thanks for this. And I have updated! Woo hoo - more Scorose for everyone!

♥ Beth


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Review #11, by LilyFlower_x 

18th August 2014:
Just re-read the whole story together with the revisions and it hangs together perfectly. The new details make it better to read and I love this story still :) Can't wait for the next chapter! Love this story!

Author's Response: Hi hi!

Wow! You re-read the WHOLE story! So glad you liked the revisions. I'm much more comfortable with the writing overall. Thanks again for this wonderful review!

Beth


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Review #12, by Paddlewaddle 

11th August 2014:
This chapter was beautiful. That raw emotion and tenderness came across so well in the shower scene and the aftermath that I really had no words to describe how perfect they are for each other. This chapter really resonates the the title of the story "Actions Speak Louder than Words". It may be short, but it was probably one of the best chapters that really showcase the relationship and the unlimited trust that Rose and Scorpius have in each other. This story keeps getting better and better and I can't wait for the next!

Author's Response: Hiya!

You always *get* my chapters so well! It just makes me squee for your reviews! I know it was short, but I said everything that was needed. I'm so glad you enjoyed it and really *felt* how much these two care for each other.

Thanks again!

Beth


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Review #13, by MargaretLane 

10th August 2014:
Yikes, you update quickly. *grins*

This is REALLY nitpicky, but "said she would just wait for you down there" sounds pretty formal for casual conversation. "...said she'd just wait for you down there" might sound more natural. There are a few other places too where contractions might make things sound more natural.

I like the fact you continue to make reference to their injuries. Stuff like that is easy to forget, or to omit, feeling it will get repetitive and it's not really realistic that they would never be mentioned again. It makes far more sense that they WOULD be thinking about them, as they are here.

I also really like the sentence where he feel tears in his eyes. Somehow you write that in such a way that one can really feel his helplessness and sadness over everything that's happened.

Hmm, that's an interesting distinction, how Rose looks at the injury differently when working as a Healer. It shows her professionalism - that she is able to put aside her relationship to the injured and her worries about them and just concentrate on her job. And she thinks she isn't strong!

Again, I think "she told me we'd a bond most people wait an entire lifetime for" might sound more natural than "she told me that we had a bond that most people wait an entire lifetime for."

I'll admit I'm not a great fan of romantic stuff or of physical description, which this chapter contains a lot of (I tend to skim the battle scenes in Harry Potter and just wait for Dumbledore's explanation of what was basically going on), but that's just personal preference and I do see the importance of this chapter and how it shows Scorpius and Rose beginning to get over all the things that stand between them - their family histories, both of their traumas, his worry that he might be pushing her into something she's not ready for - and realising they need each other and can help each other. So while it's not exactly my favourite chapter, I do see that it's a significant one.

Author's Response: Hello!

Work has been a bit lighter the past few months, so I've had time to update at a more regular pace. I don't think I'll be able to keep it up through the fall, though :(.

I've been trying to make a more concerted effort to look at my dialogue - specifically the contractions, and I 100% appreciate the feedback on this.

Forgetting about injuries or birth dates and all the other little details is also a pet peeve of mine, so I try really hard to maintain accuracy.

Yeah, Rose is a top Healer. I can't believe that she doesn't see how strong she is either - sheesh Rose!

Haha - I was actually going to PM you and warn you about this chapter - but you read it before I had a chance. I knew it wasn't your cup of tea, but I REALLY appreciate the review. I can promise you that we're done with the mushy stuff for a bit!

Thanks again!

Beth


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Review #14, by maggie4721 

10th August 2014:
Great chapter, only wish it was longer. :)

Author's Response: Hi!

Thanks so much for the review! This chapter was really hard for me to write - I know it was short - sorry!


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Review #15, by CambAngst 

8th August 2014:
Hi, Beth!

I'm thinking really hard about the ideal word to describe this chapter. What word really captures the lush depths and gripping sensuality of your descriptions? It feels a little odd, but "luscious" comes to mind. Reading this was an almost tactile experience. It's too bad that you can't close your eyes and still be able to read, because at times I felt like I could have closed my eyes and actually experienced the sensations that Scorpius was feeling. You wrote it just that well. Bravo!

His encounter with Albus and Selenia was a nice little mood-setter for what was to come. Scorpius obviously wasn't going to stick around for the show, but I think it put him in a mindset for the best way to celebrate being alive and all in one piece.

Based on your descriptions of the ash and sawdust covering him, it seems that Scorpius and Ron released a lot of pent-up frustration on the woods.

Wow. The whole shower scene was an amazing piece of writing. I don't think you could have done a better job of drawing the reader into a scene. It was so vivid. Losing yourself in it was effortless. THIS is how two people who deeply, passionately love one another interact. It was honestly breathtaking.

I don't think there's anything else to say. I certainly didn't see any typos or grammatical problems. It was short and beautiful and amazing. Great job!

Author's Response: Hiya Dan,

I'm still swooning over the awesomeness of this review. Wow. And seriously. Thank you.

Luscious. I love it.

I couldn't help myself with the Al/Selenia scene. They are just that 'madly in love from the beginning' couple that can be annoying, but you love them so you put up with it type. (Wow - seriously run on sentence, there - haha).

The shower scene took a few edits to get right, but I was actually pretty confident when I submitted it. The very last paragraph (that I wrote forever ago), I was the most proud of.

Scorpius needed this from her. He is really alone in this world - no parents or basically any other family. He does have his Aunt Daphne, but she lives in the Muggle world.

And Rose needed to do this for Scorpius. She 'needed to be needed' by someone for reasons other than Healing.

I know this chapter is so different from the others, but I really had fun writing it!

Thanks again!

Beth


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