4 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Teddy1993 

28th September 2014:
I didn't really expect Astoria to be suspended from Hogwarts. Not this early at least. I wonder how this will end. Great chapter!

Author's Response: Hehe, these last few chapters thrive on the unexpected. Thanks for the review!! :)

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Review #2, by nott theodore 

16th August 2014:
Hi again, Jenna!

Oh wow, after the way the last chapter ended saying that things were going to get even worse I was wondering how they possibly could, but you managed to write events that were simply terrifying to read. I was so scared for Tor all the way through this chapter! In the back of my mind I know that she's going to survive because it's a trilogy and she's going to marry Draco, but at the same time I get nervous that things are just going to go badly for her, and if not for her then those around her. I'm also really conscious of the prediction that two of the people she loves are going to die in this war, and we're approaching the end of the year too...

The incident with the manticore was absolutely chilling! I don't know how you managed to conjure up such a scary image in my mind but the animal sounding terrifying and horrible and I can't believe that it's allowed to be in the halls of Hogwarts, patrolling for rule breakers to turn them over to the teachers. And if the appearance of the animal, and its smell, weren't enough, it started speaking and everything that it said was just so creepy and horrible that I felt goosebumps!

I'm not surprised that Tor experienced one of those explosions of innate magic that are meant to protect witches and wizards, but I'm so scared for her! I love the way you explained the way that magic works though, and that it can protect young witches and wizards from incidents and accidents that would easily hurt a Muggle child - that ties in really well with canon. But Tor's got a broken leg or something and she's unconscious in the corridor with Terry's letter - you know how to make me scared!

I really enjoyed reading the scene in the hospital wing too, even if I was worried for Tor all the way through it and horrified at what the staff were doing to her. The fact that she wanted to see Daphne there, even though they've not been on the best of terms recently, made perfect sense, because siblings really are some of the only people that you never need to care about appearances with and there's a comfort in their presence which is hard to explain. It's clear that even though they don't always get on well, Tor really does love her family.

I'm glad that it was Snape who came to the hospital wing to see her rather than the Carrows, because not only would they have been crowing in a victory over her, but I feel like they'd have tried to inflict more injuries too. Even so, Snape was so harsh with her, although I suspect that it may be because of orders that he's received from others outside of Hogwarts and he has to go along with them to appear like someone who's true and loyal to the Death Eater cause. Her mother was horrible in the way she didn't seem to care for protecting her daughter, though! The only good thing that seemed to happen there was that Tor hadn't directly written to Terry, since she was able to pass it off as a letter to Taurus, who at least is a Slytherin and pureblood. But her mum did mention that there have been all sorts of rumours about her daughter and that's making me really worried for what's going to happen when Terry comes back into the story!

I didn't expect Draco to be the one to escort Tor home to Malfoy Manor but at least it wasn't one of the bigger Death Eaters who probably wouldn't have cared that much about Tor's feelings or not scaring her or anything. I liked the fact that she had a sort of send-off committee, too, and that Ginny cared enough to try and tell her to keep fighting. And the Nott boys ♥

I thought the scene between Yaxley and Tor in the Malfoy garden was great. You made Yaxley seem so human in that scene, because he's so worried about his family. He's disappointed in the way that Tor's been defying the Carrows and isn't going along with everything he's taught her, especially since she always seemed to be his favourite daughter, but even so, he really cares about her and loves her and doesn't want her to get hurt. He's in a bit of a precarious position, since favour with Voldemort is always difficult to maintain - if Tor starts misbehaving so obviously as well as her grandmother having gone into hiding, then things could become really difficult for their family.

Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse after Tor having the encounter with the manticore and being sent home from Hogwarts for lessons with a private tutor (and I'm dreading to see who that tutor's going to be, especially if it's someone appointed by the Ministry), she manages to walk into a room full of Snatchers who don't seem to care much about the fact that her father's Orpheus Yaxley. Tor's got a real talent for walking into situations like this one (which is definitely not a good thing) and I was so worried about what they were going to do to her. When Yaxley came in and defended his daughter so violently, I could understand why he'd done it, and it proves how much he loves Tor, but at the same time it shows how cruel he can be, as those are his automatic reactions. And then that last line about Nagini coming to the room is just chilling and horrible to think of!

Actually, I'm scared to press the next chapter button right now because I know the next chapter contains the scene that we glimpsed in the prologue. So the Snatchers that are here at Malfoy Manor have probably brought Terry here and that's why Tor's been taken there, because they suspect something about the two of them... Oh no. I can't believe that we're here already, and it really doesn't seem like over a year since I first started reading this story!

Ah, okay, plucking up some Gryffindor courage and carrying on...

Sian :)

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Review #3, by marauderfan 

15th August 2014:
Wow, your description of Manticores is super creepy and with its protruding head and three sets of teeth I imagine it looking like the alien from Alien. Omg scary.


Wow, that scene was so intense, the one where she got suspended and her mother didn't stand up for her. I'm glad she still has those bonds of solidarity with the DA (though she doesn't know about them exactly) as she leaves, with Ginny silently urging her to keep going.

Well, I had thought that was intense, but the scene at Malfoy Manor was even more so! Aah! I can't believe that happened. Also I really like the way you highlight Astoria's relationship with her faher in this chapter: he is disappointed in her for not turning out how he wanted her to be and for having a stubborn, opinionated mind of her own, but he cares about her more than anything. So complex in the grey areas of good and bad and that's one of the things I love most about this story.

And since I've been away so long, there is another chapter waiting for me, which i'm going to read immediately! So, until next time!

Author's Response: Hi Kristin! :) So first of all I am way too late in responding to this amazing review and I am so sorry!! There really is no excuse.

Ah, I was terrified of the manticore too! Yeah definitely some sort of weird alien demon thing. This is kind of where Tor's good luck runs out and she has to face everyone about what she's been up to. :P

Tor isn't Ginny's main focus, but they do have their weird bond and Ginny is rooting for her to be okay. I'm excited to write more of their friendship in the sequel! :D

Hehe, I'm glad you liked the scene at Malfoy Manor! The chapter title, Monster, was supposed to function for both big scenes in a way, with the manticore being the literal monster and then Tor herself, or the Death Eaters and her parents, being monsters in their own right. Her father definitely cares about her, but at the same time he can't just be a good father because he has to tread a very fine line for his power and safety. I'm glad you like the grey areas, as they are so fascinating to write! I don't even know whether I love Yaxley or hate him, haha. :P

Thanks so much, lovely! :D

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Review #4, by Fox 

30th July 2014:
Gah! What happens next??? Please say there is more... I have read the entire thing in a day (and that's difficult to do when you have school) and I am dying to find out what happens next. Please don't let this be the end

Author's Response: Hello! :)

Aw, thanks so much! I'm so honoured that you're liking the story and took the time to read all of it so quickly - wow! I promise that there is more, hopefully coming soon. There are two or three chapters left of this novel, and then two sequels for the future. :)

Thanks so much for the lovely review!

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