Our website is made possible by displaying online advertisements to our visitors.
Please consider supporting us by disabling your ad blocker.





  
16 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Wonder Wall 

22nd March 2016:
God Harry is a jerk and Ron is completely right about everything. Harry has gotten so full of himself maybe Ron should have left him at the bottom of that pond in DH.

 Report Review

Review #2, by MrsJaydeMalfoy 

21st September 2015:
Okay, so I REALLY wanted to punch Ron in the beginning of this chapter. But then, reading about Hermione's struggling to get over what happened to her at Malfoy Manor really helped me to understand his side of things - even if he IS holding on to grudges and overreacting. I really hope this conversation with Harry, Ginny and Hermione can help him realize that - but I'm also slightly worried that Dom might have died because they're all crying... *bites fingernails furiously*

I really, really hope Rose doesn't let this new information about her Mom's torture affect her relationship with Scorpius.

*Hurries to read next chapter*

Author's Response: Hey there!

I really struggled with putting Ron's little snippet in there. It broke my POV rule of switching between only Rose and Scorpius. But I agree with you, think it was necessary to understand where he is coming from. And if you like the whole Ron/Hermione angle, I do have a story up that deals with her (Hermione's) post-war PTSD on my Author's Page (*hides in shame at the self promotion*)

Anyway, Ron takes a slow path to realize that Scorpius isn't Draco. Hopefully, you'll see his baby steps :D

♥ Beth


 Report Review

Review #3, by Penelope Inkwell 

15th September 2015:
I was so proud of Rose, here! You tell 'em. And I'm glad that she finally knows about her mom. I think that could help her a lot.

I'm actually really glad you gave us Ron's POV. He was so awful at the meeting--not just to Scorpius. He was incredibly inconsiderate to his own daughter, as well. But getting inside his head a bit allows it to all make sense, and for us to understand that he's connecting all this to Hermione's own torture and the aftereffects of all that. I've seen a lot of fics where Ron holds this kind of irrational rage at the Malfoys, and sometimes it seems so over the top, but you give a really good reason and explanation. You let us inside his head, and it works.

I was glad for how James and Albus stood up for them immediately.

It's still not okay that he treated them that way, but it's understandable now.


CC:

searching for a fee space to stand
ffee = free


Man, the mystery of all this is killing me. Why do they want Rose? Why attack the whole pub?

Man. That was one heck of a day.

Great job, as always.

--Penny

Author's Response: Hi again!

Rose and Hermione have a lot in common - and hiding their pasts is just the tip of the iceberg. This is the first step to the two growing a bit closer.

Thanks for the comment about Ron. I really, *REALLY* felt I needed to have that little snippet there to give his character a bit of balance. I'm a HUGE Ron fan, but writing this entire story form only Rose and Scorpius's POVs was a little limiting for that particular character.

The next-gen kids are a tight group. And even though they haven't had to fight a war like their parents, they're still quite loyal to one another.

I fixed that typo - thanks so much for catching it!

♥ Beth


 Report Review

Review #4, by Tonks1247 

9th July 2015:
So. That was kinda intense.

I have to start by saying I really do adore Scorpius’ POV. I don’t know what it is about him, but he goes about things in such a different way than Rose. He takes the time to think through situations, knows when to back off and let things go, he’s observant, and, of course, some of his inner monologue makes me laugh. He really is a great character and his adoration for Rose is just so fantastic and I’m pretty sure you’re slowly but surely brainwashing me into loving Scorpius so much that he’s my favourite next gen character…which isn’t half as bad as I made it sound there…I kinda like it actually…

Ron’s POV here was amazing as well. I think, despite not remembering exactly what comes of this conversation, that it is an important little bit to have in there. It gives a good insight to Hermione’s past and opens the doors of similarities between Rose’s struggles and her mothers. Of course, Ron doesn’t know of them quite so well yet, but the fact that he has those connections and had to see Hermione suffer like that…it really kinda hurt. I mean, it’s great, but just…makes me sad.

Rose’s POV again was good as well. I like how she continually recognizes that he’s not his family. I do think she should, you know, say that to Scorpius more than once (since Ron’s so good at telling him the opposite and he doesn’t hear differently…), but just the fact that she knows that and loves him…I just really love the two of them and their dynamic. You build them such a loving relationship and I really, really adore it.

As for favourite lines here in this chapter:

“Sure. He gets a warning.” “That settles it. Albus is her favorite.”

“Look, if you idiots wouldn’t be so proud and moronic and simply go to St. Mungo’s to get treated first, I wouldn’t have to be here.”

Both made me giggle just a little bit. :D

Anddd before I forget. I love how you had all the chapters that start with ‘break’ all in the same day! I must then question…does this occur with all of the chapters that begin with the same word? I may have to investigate that a bit further to see…also…why the letter B? (Curiosity killed the cat…and I won’t make that lame joke about me not being a cat because that would be lame ;) )

Great job! Great chapter!
-Mikaela

Author's Response: Hi Mikaela,

So happy you mentioned those comments about Scorpius's POV. That's one of the places I've been really concerned about with this story. I really wanted to make sure they each had their own "voice" and I also wanted to make sure he sounded like a twenty-something guy. I'm breathing a sigh of relief here, because it sounds like I've managed it :)

Ron's POV is the one place (so far) that I deviated going between Rose and Scorpius. I tried to take out that part - and I tried to write it from Rose POV and I also tried to write it from Ron's POV as 1st person, but this just worked the best. It's a very private moment for him and it wouldn't feel right to have it be told from either Rose or Scorpius POV, but it NEEDED to be there to give some context as to what was really going on with Ron. He's an emotionally charged character - and definitely not the best with articulating those emotions, but he's a good man, a good father and a good husband.

Haha - Rose should say a LOT of things to Scorpius more often. She's not very good at being clear with him...

I think I answered the "B" question in an earlier response, but here's the short version. The "B" thing happened by accident, after the first few chapters were named and now I just can't break it (see what I did there?) The break part was a bit intentional because it was a big day for Rose (and because it was easy to name a bunch of chapters in a row that way - haha). The "bound" part also ties together a series of chapters, but they are tied together because they are part of Rose and Scorpius making some major life decisions, but they don't all happen in the same day. And like I said before, I'm ALWAYS looking for "B" words to name my chapters, so any suggestions are greatly appreciated! There have been times that my chapter was all edited and ready to post but I had to wait a few days until I came up with the title! Sheesh!

Haha - you found MY favorite line too! I love snarky Scorpius, especially when it comes to Albus.

Thanks again!

♥ Beth


 Report Review

Review #5, by crestwood 

12th June 2015:
I don't quite understand why Ron is so angry at Scorpius right now--something tells me it is not about his being late. And wow! I can't believe I've gone this long without knowing these details. I can't believe Rose is standing up to them in front of everyone. And Ron was completely out of line for saying that about Scorpius. I understand that he's angry and doesn't like him and all, but that was definitely not something that needed to be said in front of everyone. That being said, it was totally something that he'd do.

I had a feeling that Ron was going to pull the Malfoy card at some point. I really love Harry in this story. He's really become levelheaded with age.

I've never seen Ron POV before! I thought the little moment we got inside of his mind was great. Awesome work!

Slytherin - House Cup 2015 Review

Author's Response: Hiya Joey,

Yeah, Ron is a big fat jerk in this chapter. He was definitely out of line and the whole reason why I put his short POV at the end was to give it some back story so that he wasn't completely demonized. He is so, so protective of the women in his life that he can't see the forest for the trees sometimes. He comes around though - albeit SLOWLY, but old grudges die hard and Hermione's struggles post-war still stick with him.

Thanks again,

♥ Beth


 Report Review

Review #6, by merlins beard 

6th May 2015:
Hi again, Beth!

I'm kind of lost for words at the moment... I don't even know what to say.

This was so emotional and crazy, I don't have a place to start.

Ron really crossed a line in Harry's office attacking Scorpius like that. If Scorp hadn't left Albus, Ron would have accused him of not protecting Rose.

Kudos to Harry for staying so calm at Ron's outbreak. I would have been at his throat right in front of all the other Aurors.

Rose is so great in that situation. She's cheeky and sassy and holds her own in a room full of powerful men. I admire that, and I can totally understand why Scorpius is proud of her.

I'm a little concerned about how Dom is going, and I'm worried about what Harry, Ginny and Hermione are going to tell Ron and if he'll accept that.

I'll just go find all that out in the next chapter (I hope)

~Anja

Author's Response: Hey there!

Ron is insanely protective of the women in his life. So much that he doesn't usually make the best decisions. He has a 20 year grudge against Draco and isn't about to let up on his son - *especially* now that Rose and Scorpius are an item.

I *loved* writing this side of Rose. And I wanted to show that Scorpius supports her and loves her for all that she is - he isn't just someone to turn to when times are rough.

Yeah, Dom's in pretty bad shape. But I guess you'll just have to read to find out!

♥ Beth


 Report Review

Review #7, by Ranger 

3rd December 2014:
I am so sick of self righteous Harry who keeps sticking his nose into things that aren't his business. Mainly Ron and his relationship with his children in which Harry has inserted himself even though he has no business being in it.

Also speaking as a man if I were Ron I'd have beaten Harry down for hiding that torture bit from me and then I'd have cut him out of my life. Its so utterly dishonest, some amazingly dishonorable that it makes me hate Harry.

Harry who so has to be the center of attention that he interferes with a father daughter relationship from the start. Then he ignores all of Ron's VERY salient points. The storyline is very intriguing but oh how I loathe Harry.

Also a Ron bashing warning in your summary might be warranted since one of the main points of the story seems to be Harry taking Ron's place as Rose's father.

Author's Response: I'm not exactly sure that I've written Ron the way that I've intended if you're getting this much out of it. Harry didn't really insert himself in Rose's life, rather he was always around because he is Rose's uncle (and godfather). Ron is pretty bad at showing emotion, so Rose just felt like it was easier to talk to Harry. Ron's got that Weasley temper and my version of Rose doesn't.

Harry was in a pretty tough spot on this one. I don't think he really WANTED to keep this from Ron - and he did mention that to Rose, but as Head Auror, his job was to keep her safe above all else.

I'm not a Ron-hater. I love Ron! I just wanted to flesh out the more complicated aspects of the relationships with the next generation.

~Beth


 Report Review

Review #8, by luciusobsessed 

21st August 2014:
You wrote Ron so well. I love how enraged he was and I didn't expect any less. I thought it was hilarious how the first thing he thought of was food. It's like typical Ron :) I feel bad that he compares Scorp to the rest of his family when he's obviously not. And I wonder why Hermione and Ginny had red swollen eyes? Did something happen to Dom? Eek! On to the next :D

Author's Response: Hello again!

I think I need to re-write that last part with Ron because the red swollen eyes were just because Ginny and Hermione were discussing Rose's torture and the fact that she'd lived with it for two years before anyone else found out. However, so much is going on in the story at this point that I can see where the reader could take this any number of ways.

Ron is tough. He is being tough basically to protect his wife, because Hermione was a shattered mess after the war and he helped her pick up the pieces. He sees Scorpius as part of the problem because he's part of Draco. It's going to be a longer road for the two of them.

Thanks again ♥

Beth


 Report Review

Review #9, by LightLeviosa5443 

20th August 2014:
Wow. So, again you've done it. You've given me another insane heartbreaking moving emotional chapter and I'm just sitting here like what.

Like how do you even? Hold on, i'm finding real words to use.

Okay, so I liked the way that Ron reacted, because he's always been rash and I like that you show that he hasn't changed. I also liked the way that Harry got mad. I think it was important to see how Harry really feels about Rose and how he can maintain that professionalism even with his best friend.

That said, I was a puddle of family love when Rose was healing Albus, and then snickered when she was rougher with James. It was priceless. I also was a big puddle of feels when Rose was with Scorpius, both in the first section and the last. It was just cute and believable and such a nice tender moment in all of the intensity and insanity. I feel so bad for Rose. I want to hug her.

The middle section in Ron's POV. That got me. I mean, I don't even have words. It was just insane and amazing and perfect and moving and yes. beautiful job. I loved every second of this chapter.

xoxo Sarah ♥

Author's Response: Hiya,

I was pretty happy with how this chapter turned out. I mean Rose is just running on empty here - she's had a rough day at work and then the breakthrough with Scorpius and the pub and now her dad is all being "Ron" and she just needs some solid ground at this point. Again, she finds solace when healing others. It is kind of her "safe place."

Rose and Albus have a really special connection - more so than the other Weasley/Potters. They have always been together and they look out for each other in ways that go deeper than maybe even siblings do. They are definitely closer to each other than to any of their own siblings.

I'm so glad you commented on the section with Ron - I was worried about that one, especially since I broke my POV for his scene. But I felt like I really needed to give his character some vindication. Ron is passionate and sometimes when it comes to his family, that passion just spills over and gets the best of him.

Thanks again, hon. Your reviews are so lovely.

♥ Beth


 Report Review

Review #10, by MargaretLane 

5th August 2014:
Ha, Ron is being rather harsh on Scorpius. WHY doesn't that surprise me?

Yikes, that part about him possibly looking for LILY is somewhat scary and didn't occur to me, although it did cross my mind at one point that if revenge was his motivation, then he might well be looking for an opportunity to get at Lily too and just not have had that opportunity as she is younger and usually either at Hogwarts or around her family.

Molly's parents weren't really involved in the resistance though and while Dom and Roxie's WERE, it was to nowhere near the same extent as Ron and Hermione. I think it is at least possible that somebody is targeting their children.

I think it is totally in character for Harry to decide ignoring Ron is pretty much the best bet. That's more or less what he did when he was messing up at Quidditch too, until he could get him alone.

I like the way you show the effect what happened to Hermione had on her. I do feel she seemed to get over it a little too quickly in the books. I mean she was brutally tortured and it seemed like she was a bit shaken for a couple of hours and then just forgot about it. Though of course, we don't know whether it returned to haunt her after the battle and with the events of the battle and all, she hadn't much time to dwell on it then. They do say sometimes during a war or other crisis, trauma doesn't hit in until afterwards when people can focus on something other than surviving. So I think it's quite realistic that she'd show reaction afterwards.

Oh, you've written "it was all because of the Malfoy's." There shouldn't be an apostrophe before that "s", as it's a plural, not a possessive.

I think Rose really needs to talk to Hermione. I think, more than anybody, Hermione would be able to understand what she is going through and reassure her that you CAN get over such trauma.

Author's Response: Hi hi!

Ron's abuse of Scorpius isn't going to end anytime soon - he really is not a fan of the Malfoys. Although he does lighten up in the next chapter :)

I LOVE your guesses. *begins evil laugh* but I'm not going to comment on them just yet...

You are the first one who likes that Harry ignored Ron. I just thought he would try to avoid a big confrontation in front of the entire department - until it couldn't be avoided any longer.

Yes! I agree about Hermione. I also felt like it was glossed over in the books - but I chalked it up to the same thing - she is a tough Gryffindor and had a job to do - and she held it all in. However, that sort of trauma can't be buried forever, and she would have a tough time getting through it after everything settled down a bit.

Several people have mentioned that I need a mother-daughter heart to heart. I am working on it. I think it will be the next chapter I post for the story, but it wasn't in the original, so I have to write it from scratch.

Thanks for all your cc. I *promise* I will get to all of them. I really want the story to look its best.

♥ Beth


 Report Review

Review #11, by kenpo 

4th August 2014:
AHHH ANOTHER ONE OH MY GOD THIS WAS SO INTENSE.
(BvB, by the way)

I really think I need to start limiting myself to one chapter at a time (she says as she's about to fly through this review so she can get to the next chapter)

Wow. I didn't think about how short a time period this has been until your AN. Rose needs a nap. I'm starting a campaign. #RoseNeedsANap

Okay, you mentioned in our PM that you thought I wouldn't like how you portrayed Ron, and... I'm totally fine with it. It isn't how I would've written him, but... I'm not writing him. You are. So what I would've done doesn't matter. And you imply that he isn't always like this with the comments about how Rose has never seen them fight like that, and how angry Harry is tells us that Ron doesn't make outbursts like that a habit. So no, I'm not upset about Ron. Your fic, your Ron.

I do want to see how he reacts to finding out about Rose and everything. Will that be in the next chapter? I might have to go read it... not sure... I have some other reviews that I owe people and I might want to get those done before coming back here...

I LOVED Rose here. I think that if she wasn't healing people through the chapter, she would've reacted to everything completely differently. I love how you've basically written two different characters for Rose. One when she's just Rose, and one when she's Healer Rose. I hope that some of her confidence from Healer Rose can seep into Rose Rose :)

I liked Harry here. Go Harry!

I can sort of see why Ron is so upset though. I feel like part of it (although it isn't an excuse) is that he's probably jealous of Harry and Rose's relationship. He's always played second fiddle to Harry, and now it's almost like Harry is being a better father to Rose than he is. That's gotta be rough! So... it would be one thing for me if you had Ron acting like this literally all the time, but it's totally in character for him to have these moments.

I'm a big fan of the way you wrote Scorpius here. I think it was a cool choice to make it from his POV even though he wasn't really the focus of the chapter. It was less things happening to him than us just seeing how things happen though his eyes. He seemed to do a pretty good job handling his emotions, and while it is unfair for him to get yelled at, he reacted pretty well.

I also loved him thinking about how cool Rose is!! YAY FOR SCOROSE!!!

One thing that I wasn't sure about was Harry's apparently inability to calm down Ron. I know that this was such a sore subject for Ron, but given how long they've been working together and been besties, I would've thought that Harry would be able to get Ron to take it down a notch before having to get into a screaming match with him. I'd also have liked to maybe see a little bit more of Albus?

I'm rambling, because there's so much that I want to say!! And not enough brain power to say it!!

This was another great chapter!!

-Georgia

Author's Response: Hi Georgia,

Thanks again for yet *another* awesome review! Yeah, Rose is pretty much on empty here - she does deserve a nap.

I'm quite relieved that you're ok with my Ron. I think that I do him some justice in the next chapter, so hopefully you like that as well :) You will get to see a bit of his reactions - but the scene at the end in his kitchen is where he finds out about Rose. I was worried about having too many scenes with peoples' reactions to finding out about her torture. I already had Dom, Selenia, Albus, Scorpius, Harry, Ginny (sort of) and Hermione. Not that Ron's reaction isn't significant, I just didn't want overkill.

You're right about Rose and healing. It's almost like her safe place. She knows what she is doing when she's helping others - she's comfortable and in control.

Yes! Ron is always second fiddle to Harry - and this just adds fuel to the fire. He is so irritated with Scorpius and his temper just gets away from him. You are the second person to comment on Harry not calming Ron down before the outburst. For one, I don't know if Harry realized how irate he was until he started shouting his head off at Scorp - Harry was busy running the meeting. Secondly, he was still kind of torn because Rose had specifically asked Harry not to let her father know about her torture. Although, the point is pretty moot because Ron finds out at the end of the chapter, anyway.

I am always SO relieved when someone tells me that they like how I wrote Scorpius. I originally wrote this story in first person POV, then tried to switch to third person POV, but I just couldn't tell the story the way I wanted to. And because it is really about BOTH of them, I needed to switch between Scorpius and Rose. Needless to say, I am not a 21 year old pure blood wizards whose parents died when I was 15. I am super nervous about being realistic when it comes to his voice. I don't want him to sound like a wimp.

I also had already written two scenes (that took place in the same day) from Rose's POV that had her in Healer-mode. I thought it would be nice for the reader to see how Rose works from his POV - SO glad you liked it!

I can't tell you enough how much they mean to me!

♥ Beth


 Report Review

Review #12, by Dianainga 

27th July 2014:
I am confused...what happened at the end of Ron's POV? Is it Dom? Surely, they had some better way of contacting Ron especially with him being a Sr. Auror. Love the story..but was confused by this.

Author's Response: Hi!

Thanks for the review! I think you are the second person to comment on the confusion with Ron. I am going to edit that - still thinking of how I want to do it. It isn't Dom, the other three are just going to finally tell Ron about Rose's torture during her abduction. She had told Harry a few months back, who confided in Ginny and then Hermione found out about it earlier that night. The reason they didn't contact him was because it wasn't a true emergency and - ya know Ron - he needs a bit of time to cool off.

Thanks again - I appreciate the feedback!


 Report Review

Review #13, by Cake 

23rd July 2014:
Sorry, I realized that I needed to clarify something
My previous review was of the story as a whole. I binge-read it and was too excited to post a review on every chapter.
I wish I was eloquent enough to tell you everything I think about your writing, but I agree with almost everything in the other reviews I have read.
Grammar and spelling are really important, and you did a great job with the editing. People often don't realize how distracting and disillusioning editing mistakes can be.

Author's Response: Hello again!

Two reviews - wow and thanks! I think you're doing a fine job of telling me what you think! I do work fairly hard on the editing part, because I agree with you about grammar and spelling - a story can have a great plot, but if you are always coming across glaring errors, it takes something away from it.

For right now, I am updating fairly regularly, so you shouldn't have to wait too long for the next chapter. Thanks again for stopping by!

~Beth (Veritaserum27)


 Report Review

Review #14, by Cake 

22nd July 2014:
The only specific praise that I have is that I really enjoyed the last few chapters where Harry, Ron, and Hermione's experiences were brought in. Those instances connect this story with the original series, which helps me connect with the characters you're developing. Also, the adult aspects make it more realistic and relatable, and I'm impressed by your subtle innuendo and classy restraint.
I eagerly read through this in one sitting and was really disappointed when I didn't find a "Next Chapter" button on this page.
I felt like it would be wrong of me to enjoy your writing so much without telling you. I am desperate for the Harry Potter universe to continue expanding, and you do a very nice job holding true to the characters and story line.

Author's Response: Hi!

Sorry for not responding to this sooner. Thank you, thank you, thank you for taking the time to write a review.

"I eagerly read through this in one sitting and was really disappointed when I didn't find a "Next Chapter" button on this page."

That is one of the nicest compliments I've ever received! I've done that with other stories and I never really imagined that someone would be so drawn in by mine that they would read it all at once!

I'm glad you noticed the little pieces of the books that I've put into the story! No one has mentioned that yet!

Thanks again!

P.S. I LOVE your username! Is it in homage to the band - or do you just really enjoy eating cake??


 Report Review

Review #15, by amelia_rose_pond 

22nd July 2014:
Ah!!! Such a fantastically written scene! I can't wait for the next update!!

Author's Response: Thanks for another review and the kind words.

I hope to have another update soon!


 Report Review

Review #16, by CambAngst 

22nd July 2014:
Hi, Beth! It's always a nice surprise when I check in with this story and there's a new chapter posted.

I didn't really think about the timeline until I was reading your author's note at the end, but now that I think about it, Rose must have been running on fumes throughout this chapter. She made it through the aftermath of the mass-splinching, she got it on with Scorpius, she went out to a bar, she survived a death eater attack, she had that huge emotional moment with her mother... Wow. She literally must have been on the verge of collapse.

I feel like some readers might not agree or approve, but I have to say that I thought you got Ron exactly right in this chapter. He doesn't deal with change well, nor does he deal well with adversity when it's personal. He tends to get angry, look for scapegoats (Hermione in the early part of Sorceror's Stone, Harry in Goblet of Fire and again in Deathly Hallows) and say nasty things that he regrets later. The fact that everyone is telling him that he's wrong would only tend to make him angrier.

With Rose, I thought you hit a pretty good balance. She was very immersed in her work, which gave her the confidence to challenge her uncle. "Harry spoke first, since everyone else was pretty much tongue tied, in awe of her... well..." Yeah, that. ;) At the same time, you didn't overdo it. She still can't quite bring herself to tell her father off. She's hurt by his cruel words and lack of understanding. Instead, you gave her small shows of defiance, like holding Scorpius's hand or tucking into his embrace.

Scorpius's emotions made perfect sense to me throughout. He's worried about Rose and angry at the mistreatment she's suffering from her father. At the same time, he knows he's on thin ice, job-wise. And I think he had faith that Harry wasn't going to let Ron go too far, which probably helped.

The way you wrote Harry in this chapter was, for me, a big improvement over the chapter where Rose finally tells him about Stannous. I could feel a bit of fire and emotion there, tempered by the fact that he was presiding over a meeting full of people who work for him. I did feel like it was a little too late and a little too formal when he finally told Ron off. Given how well he knows Ron, I would have expected him to try to slow the Ron Train down a bit earlier and a bit less administratively. Then again, maybe he just knows a lost cause when he sees one.

I think the character I was most confused by in this chapter was Albus. Up to this point, you've painted him as something of a hothead who's viciously protective of Rose. Here, he watches her absorb a mountain of abuse from her father and he really only steps in to try to defend Scorpius.

I really liked the PoV changes in this chapter and I thought that every scene added something. Ron's scene added some very necessary color and depth to his anger. Without that, I think Ron would have come off a bit caricatured. Instead, you made his feelings seem natural and believable. For a moment, I was tempted to believe that you were dropping a cliffhanger on us, but I think they're just going to tell Ron the truth about what Stannous did to Rose. The final scene from Rose's PoV added a little closure and certainty to her feelings at the end of this very long, very hard day.

I didn't see a single typo or misplaced word in this chapter. Great editing, and overall great job!

Author's Response: Hello again,

Wow. This review was amazing. I love all your reviews, but this chapter had me a bit worried. In truth, I was actually the most concerned over my portrayal of Scorpius. I really didn't want him to come across as wimpy. He also has a bit of a temper (only from time to time) and I chose for him to remain calm and focused here. I guess the dude it just really in love ♥ .

So glad you approve of Ron and Harry. I've gotten the most comments on Ron (as you predicted). I think Harry is trying to be delicate with Ron here - Rose is his daughter, after all and she came to Harry first. When Ron just explodes, Harry goes on the offense.

As far as Albus goes, maybe I didn't convey enough the seriousness of his injuries. He was in bad, bad shape. He should've been at Mungo's with Dom, but he refused. At this point, he is barely listening. He feels a bit better when Rose administers her care to him, but not completely recovered.

I might have to fix the last part from Ron's POV. More that a few people have commented on not entirely knowing what happened. It wasn't a cliffhanger or anything else. I just didn't want to write another scene about someone else finding out about Rose. Not that Ron's reaction isn't important or significant, but we've already seen, Albus, Dom, Selenia, Scorpius, Harry, Ginny (to some extent) and Hermione. I was thinking it would be overkill.

Thanks again!

Beth


 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login
Add a Review