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8 Reviews Found

Review #1, by UnluckyStar57 

7th August 2014:
...I forgot about this chapter.

Really, it must've been a dissociative thing, because I don't enjoy remembering all of the high drama and utter angstiness that happens. :/

It's very well-written, of course, and I KNOW that it all needed to happen, but WHY?!?! Why are you so excellent at pairing the very, very good with the soul-crushing, heart-wrenching bad and making me think that it's supposed to be this way?! *sob* Stop making me FEEL things, darn it!

So, since I forgot about this chapter, I thought that things were looking up for a longer period of time (for a change). And the first little bit of it was all happiness and gruff!Fitz and cohesive!Prides. It was great. Really, I loved seeing the team finally coming together after their devastation at the loss to Appleby. They're learning from their failure.

BUT MARIAH WALDMAN IS AN AWFUL PERSON. I'm sure that you get a lot of reviews that snark about her and her utter ridiculousness, and this review isn't going to break that tradition. Gr... She is so utterly awful, and it seems that her main mission in life is to stir up trouble for Fitz. She is jealous, lazy, ambitious in the worst sort of way, and positively conniving. In short, she's probably the embodiment of characteristics that people see in themselves (I know I do). As unfortunate as it is, I can understand why Mariah Waldman is so necessary to the plot of this story. But that doesn't mean that I like her. :P

And McCormack is just being dumb at this point. She's willing to believe MARIAH WALDMAN, who is FITZ'S EX-WIFE. Of course, the things that Mariah said were true, but why did McCormack have to go and get all angry about it before hearing Fitz's side? Why would she believe a player over a coach? Is she in cahoots with Mariah? Gr. Ugh, you know, at this point, I'm thinking that this story will end with Fitz taking a different coaching position (maybe in the junior league) just so that he can date Molly. But I don't really want that to happen. :/

AND THEN YOU HAD TO GO AND KILL MY FEELS. Because Fitz just HAS to go and tell Molly about McCormack's inanity, and then he tries to pull away from her when he doesn't even want to. And he thinks that she'll leave him later because he's just "someone for her to fix." Oh no. No no. Fitz is being so overdramatic in this chapter. He's got a terrible temper, yes, but can't he think rationally? Why don't he and Molly have a legitimate conversation for once, and sort things out?!

Your characters are giving me a headache. But in the best possible way. :)

I'm going to read on, just in case everything turns around again in the next chapter. (I hope it will!)

~UnluckyStar57

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Review #2, by AlexFan 

1st August 2014:
Mariah Waldman needs to go fall into a hole or something because this girl sticks her nose in business that has absolutely nothing to do with her (well it technically does since if it went bad between Fitz and Molly, which it has, how well they get along affects how well they work together and the rest of the team). Seriously, does she have some kind of jealousy issues or something? Does she want Fitz back but the reader doesn't know it yet? What is going on inside of the head of hers? You could say that Mariah is worried about things going ugly and the team falling apart but I doubt that that's why she stepped forward and did what she did (or maybe she is worried about the team in which case I respect her decision).

But of course it was Mariah who sold Molly and Fitz out, why am I not surprised? SHE NEEDS TO STOP BLOWING HOLES IN MY SHIP THIS IS NOT OKAY.

I've got my eye on her from now on.

The part about their break up that saddened me the most was the fact that both of them thought that the other didn't care as much as they did when in fact both Molly and Fitz (the idiots) cared a lot about each other. I just felt like yelling at the two of them until some sense got knocked in that YOU TWO CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER AND YOU LOVE EACH OTHER SO STOP BEING STUPID.

I guess this is how being a reserved person can get you in trouble. People end up thinking that you don't care about them because you don't exactly display too much emotion.

Onwards to see how well Molly and Fitz are going to get along after this and how it's going to affect Molly's playing on the field.

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Review #3, by LightLeviosa5443 

7th July 2014:
Hello, back for more! Yay!

Awe, he felt warm in his toes because of Mollys smile. That's so cute. Oh wow, he didn't scream and yell like usual? It was a good practice? Uh oh McCormack. I CALLED IT. I TOTALLY CALLED IT. I HATE MARIAH SHE CAN JUST LEAVE NOW. BYE MARIAH BYE. I hope Fitz yells at her, but I'm afraid if Fitz goes and yells at her then she'll try to kiss him and Molly will walk in and it'll be bad. SO maybe Fitz should just stay put. Oh my god. She's not going to fire him is she? Okay, maybe I should scroll down and read instead of freaking out... Yeah, I'll do that.

AWE. FITZ IS IN SO DEEP AND SO IN LOVE AND SO JUST CUTE AND HE CAN'T EVEN HAVE HER. Ugh. Poor baby. I want to cuddle him. Molly is going to be devastated when she finds out. I might cry a little. I'm afraid. I HATE MARIAH SO STINKIN MUCH IT'S PAINFUL. Ugh. My heart is already breaking and he hasn't even said anything yet. And Molly is so gentle and so kind and she's so comforting and he's just broken. I hope he says that McCormack said they can't see each other anymore. At least.

Oh god. What a cute family interlude before the heartbreak. Um, Fitz, you are TERRIBLE at breaking up with people. He really is. Poor Molly. Poor Fitz. I just want to cuddle them both. Ugh. Awe. I can't even say anything. That was so sad. You did a beautiful job of writing that, but I'm not happy about it. THAT WAS SO SAD.

Poor Molly :(

That was a wonderfully heartbreaking chapter. I've never raced off to read the next one so fast. Ever. (by the way, the chapter title fits the chapter beautifully).


xoxo Sarah ♥
House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: He loves her ;) Her smiles make him happy. And yes, he didn't have to scream. Not much, anyway, since he's always cussing at someone. Mariah is rotten. You called it! Good job :) Yes, keep reading, don't freak out!

He's pretty pathetic when he's all in love and self-sacrificing, isn't he? But cute.

And she is very gentle and comforting but Fitz just then did not need her to put it quite the way she did, she sort of inadvertently triggered a bunch of his insecurities. He is completely crap at break ups.

Thank you so much for the review! I always love reading your reviews :D I'm really glad you liked it, and thanks especially for the comment about the title. I have a hard time with titles.


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Review #4, by ohnobeans 

1st July 2014:
ugh :( what a wonderfully written breakup that wasn't really a breakup because they'd never really been together anyway.

Author's Response: They weren't really "together" but still managed a painful breakup. Poor things. Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #5, by Celestie 

24th June 2014:
Oh no :(

I mean, we all saw this had to happen eventually. I personally thought Fitz or Molly would pick their careers over their relationship (and I honestly would not blame them; a lot of people would make that choice), but it sucks even more that Fitz would actually prefer her over his job. Urgh. It's one of those angsty character moments where I see him walking away, leaving her alone in the rain or something in a movie.

I really hope Molly doesn't misinterpret all of this as him not actually caring that much for her, even though he's trying to come off that way. And Mariah -- I wonder what her motive was for being so nosy. Does she resent Fitz or Molly at all? Are there any lingering feelings or is it just one last territorial move? I mean, she'd been pretty quiet lately so I assumed she was behaving.

Drat, I hope the angst doesn't last too long. Thanks for the update and update soon :D

Author's Response: Yeah, it was kind of inevitable - and honestly, they likely both would pick their careers, when you're doing sports at this level, it'd be hard to choose another way. In face, Molly's POV next chapter... Well, you'll see tomorrow ;) And yeah, he would prefer her but is afraid to ask for that kind of commitment.

Molly's POV - and more on Mariah - coming soon! I'm going to post chapter 15 tomorrow morning and 16 next Saturday :) Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I really appreciate it.


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Review #6, by ThestralPrincess 

24th June 2014:
I feel bad for not reviewing more often, because I adore your story. It makes my day every time I see an update! I adore Molly and Fitz. This chapter is so sad because I just want them to live happily ever after by now :( You write so well!

Author's Response: Aw thanks so much! I'm really glad you're enjoying the story. This is a sad one, I know. But thank you for the compliment! And you know the HEA will come - this is a romance ;)

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Review #7, by aurorasoltice 

22nd June 2014:
That's bound to happen, isnt it. Will molly be able to keep her cool tho? Prety sure she will. Thank you for the lovely update =)

Author's Response: Ah, but will she? Maybe not at first ;) And yeah, it was bound to happen. Thank you for reviewing!

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Review #8, by :) 

22nd June 2014:
So
So
Sooo good! Update soon!!

Author's Response: Thank you! :D I'm going to post chapter 15 next Saturday.

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