9 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Marshal 

4th April 2017:
This was a fun chapter, I particularly liked seeing Slughorn. I know a lot of people loath him as a character but he has always fascinated me and I tend to like his way of thinking being in the backround stroking the ego of famous people who can get you what you want and need... But still it was fun watching James and Harry squirm under his clutches! I love how it is same-o same-o with him. I particularly love how Horace collected like all the Potters.

It also amuses me that Horace wants Harry to teach - I think Harry would do well in it but if it's not what Harry wants then it is an ill fit.

You also did a nice job of building tension here for the coming final match. I will say though that I'm not sure I'd find interst in a game that was all about the snitch but that's just me I mean when points don't matter and it is all about the win the focus is all about the snitch but I do understand in James' shoes wanting to do everything you can to help your team so maybe, from that angle it would be an interesting game.

Anyway another fun chapter that was fairly enjoyable.

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Review #2, by onestop_hpfan18 

6th August 2016:
Of course James had come out of the match against Peru as the Player of the Match... love it. I also loved the camaraderie between the England teammates.

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Review #3, by nott theodore 

24th March 2014:

I meant to say this in the last review, but I really want to shake Cleo's hand for getting McLaggen with a Bludger. He definitely had that one coming, and it seems like I'm not the only one who thinks the same!

It was brilliant to see that James felt like he was becoming more of an equal amongst his England teammates in this chapter, because they're all facing something new together and none of them have ever played under this much pressure with this much at stake before. He's easing into his position in the team and adapting more to the demands and requirements that makes, and it's good to see. I definitely don't think he could have handled any of this a few months ago, if he'd carried on as he was before he got dropped from the team.

I think it's a good decision not to write all the matches out all the time. There's a lot of Quidditch in this story and there's only a certain amount of ways that you can write a Quidditch match, I think, so skirting around the edges of some of them and letting us know the outcome instead can make it more interesting.

I'm so glad England won! And James was Player of the Match in the World Cup semi-final - that's a serious achievement for him! After that I doubt that Demelza will be dropping him from the team again to play McLaggen, even if he has recovered from his injury. I loved seeing Josh Wadcock coming back in after recovering, and the way that all of the team were congratulating each other.

Aw, Della likes Ryan! That's so cute, and I love the fact she did her best to get what she wanted and asked the Thunderers to sign them all together. Go get him, girl! I'd love to read about their time in Australia, if you get any time to write about it!

Slughorn's appearance was just perfect, you captured his character so well in this. I feel like this story wouldn't have been complete if he hadn't appeared, now, especially with the world cup going on and both Harry and James being there together. And that part gave me so much to think about! I love James's loyalty to the Falcons but the fact that he hasn't signed the contract yet... is he going to end up teaching? Will the Potters do it together? Hmm...

And England are playing Ireland in the final! Clearly I am more talented than Trelawney :P *pats self on back* Now I have no idea who's going to win, and it's going to be hard with teammates and friends playing against each other, but I'm looking forward to it!

Sian :)

Author's Response: Haha, I suddenly remembered Cleo vowing to knock McLaggen out a couple of chapters ago and thought "that's going to happen..."

James' new-found confidence is odd, isn't it? It's not "I feel like I'm good enough to perform on this stage", it's "everyone else is feeling just as lost as me". But you're right; it's more a case that he doesn't feel alone, or that he's the weak one in the team compared to the others. Bless him. :)

I had a large battle with myself over whether to write this match. I always INTENDED to - because how can you skip a semi-final of all things? But I was stuck on it for weeks because I didn't know how to write it, and eventually I made the call to pass over it. We've had enough Quidditch over the last 60 chapters, I don't think this feels like a huge omission. Plus, there's now the final to come. :)

Yep, Della likes Ryan! Because I'm a sucker for a cutesy romance sideplot. :P I'm hoping I can write something about their time in Australia, it's on my list of things I could write about if ever I find the time amidst Derailed. No promises, but I'm not ruling it out. :)

SLUGHORN. You know, initially I didn't plan to insert him into this chapter. But my beta reader was forever throwing him into her chapters and saying how fun he was to write, and eventually I decided I wanted in on the action! Luckily, I was able to find a way of putting him in without it seeming forced; it DOES seem only right for him to be swarming around at a World Cup. And in the end James was able to have a conversation which is fairly important. :)

Haha, yes, you should study Divination! Thanks for reviewing :)

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Review #4, by Slide 

4th March 2014:
I had a review in progress while I read this for the first time. And then I closed the window. SLIDE IS SMART.

I like the touch of how James' inexperience is now no longer as big a deal, if only because the rest of England are as out of their depth as he is. More or less. I like seeing Michael do more - Demelza's good, but she comes across as rattled, despite expressing her belief in the team. Michael backing that up is good to see.

On the one hand, it would have been nice to see a semi-final game. On the other, I agree and appreciate that there are only so many times you can depict a Quidditch game, most of the tricks have been pulled out, and skipping the semi-final in order to keep more vim and vigour for the final is a perfectly sound idea. We have had a LOT of matches this story, and one could fuss about, 'Oh, maybe there should have been fewer matches earlier,' or the like, but A: I'm not sure that's true, and B: If only we could all edit the hell out of our serialised stories once they were done. Sigh. I think it was a good build-up to the gaining of confidence, bringing everything down to a more micro-level of James wigging, then getting his bearings, which was all we really needed to know. Adversity happened and was overcome.

I had the sense, while reading, that I'd lost track of Ireland and, oh my, what if the final winds up being England vs Ireland. My drama sense tingled most accurately.

Della is adorable. Good chapter! I promise a better review next time as I will not DESTROY my work before posting it.

Author's Response: So many times. SO MANY TIMES I have done this too, and lost a magnificent review in the making. And the thought of having to type it all out again is so painful that I run away from the chapter for about a week or more. Luckily, my most common mishap is pressing the back button, and if Chrome is being clever it saves my masterpiece for me. Shutting the window is just curtains though.

In all of James' worry that he's in new territory, he's forgotten that with every step they take through this competition, more and more of them are finding themselves in his situation. This is that moment of realisation - and actually, I imagine it's a comforting thought in one sense, that he's not the only one wading into the unknown. Demelza's in a similar position herself! Hence why she's more rattled - she's been charged with getting some serious results from an England team, and the closer they get to the end the more nervewracking it gets.

Oh yes, the semi-final debate. This chapter gave me a huge headache because the last thing I wanted to do was write another Quidditch match. I knew the Dreaded Final was looming, and the thought of having to write the semi-final out as well was putting me off getting this chapter done. So in the end, I made the call to skip it. Yes, it would have been nice to see, but on the whole I think I've spoiled you guys with matches, so hopefully this one's omission isn't too disappointing. The final will definitely have much more focus - it has a whole chapter to itself, naturally, and it's a whopper. I've written it. It probably needs a lot of editing. But the first few painful steps are done.

You called an Ireland v England final a chapter or so back, so you clearly hadn't completely lost track of them! Drama indeed. Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #5, by Lily Smith 

27th February 2014:
Just wanted to let you know, that i really love this story! You really are a great writer, and have a way of really illustrating the Quidditch matches without it becoming tedious. I also think you really do the characters justice, they all have real personalities, and you don't try to change the characters that Rowling wrote to fit a different story type. Thank you, Lily :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much! It's always a relief to know people enjoy the Quidditch because I worry that I saturate people with it. I've definitely saturated myself, that's for sure! After this fic, no more Quidditch. Ever.

I'm glad you like the characters too. I'm a big fan of fully fleshed out characters so I endeavour to do that within my own fics. Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #6, by Secretbooknerd 

27th February 2014:
So good!!! Update soon please, I check back every day

Author's Response: Next chapter is in the queue! Thanks for reviewing :)

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Review #7, by a rollerball 

14th February 2014:
awesome update, please do it again soon :)

Author's Response: Next chapter should be up soon. Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #8, by Penelope Inkwell 

11th February 2014:
HOORAY! Going to the finals! Weíre going to the finals!
--I feel like this is an actual team that Iíve been following. Like, I need a jersey and some pom-poms or something. And shouldnít I be cheering for my own country? I guess itís like the Olympics. I have my second tier nations--like, if my own is out of the running, Iíll still be happy if those ones win.

Iím not sure if thatís unpatriotic, but thatís beside the point. Especially when James Potter is involved.

Speaking of James--Player of the Match? In the semi-finals of the World Cup? You GO! :D

And also, the Slughorn cameo was great. That man...Also, good to tie in the Falcons. Love to see the team loyalty, there.

And Della has a crush on Ryan! Yay! Oh my gosh, Della and Ryan in Australia. Would you be willing to do, like, a one-shot of that? I would be so excited to read about those two. I would be all over it!

England versus Ireland. Friends versus friends. Falcons versus Falcons, yes? If Iím remembering right, Ryanís on Irelandís team, as well as some of the others (I need to look back and brush up on all that info, anyways).

Iím excited to see whatís next. Big things ahead! Thanks for another great chapter update! :D


Author's Response: It's not unpatriotic at all! You're supporting James, and that's clearly all that's important here :) But on a personal note it does make me pleased if you're so happy about them making the final, because it means I've succeeded in making you WANT them to get there. If that makes sense. It did in my head. :/

Oh, Sluggy. I've always read other people's portrayals of him and thought "That was just SO spot on" and wanted to give it a go myself. He's wonderfully easy, he just sucks up to the important people *snickers* His friend wasn't supposed to try to recruit James, but when I made him a Quidditch team owner I figured it would be unrealistic if he didn't head-hunt, so James got pounced on. :)

I actually have a lot of ideas in my head for one-shots, and if I ever get the time to write them, I would probably throw them up here. So I'm open to more suggestions! I can certainly pop Ryan/Della on my list, although I can't promise I'd get to writing it. I have a sequel to write after this, so I don't want to add too many more projects *giggles* But I'll see what I can do! :) Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #9, by JTD 

11th February 2014:
I don't write reviews for stories very often but I really think you deserve as much praise as possible for this story! The story is by far my favorite story on here. Keep up the fantastic work and update soon!

Thanks!;) -josh

Author's Response: Thank you so much, I'm really glad you're enjoying! The next chapter should hopefully be up soon. :) Thanks for reviewing!

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